Rose could see Portia’s mind working.
Sixteen days was not enough to time prepare. Rose’s trunks were packed with clothes and a few special items. But their hearts were not so easy to pack away. Goodbyes had already been said with the Perrys and Rose knew she could not leave until she spoke with Ava. The ladies at the church meeting were truly sorry to see her go. She left them a donation in Captain Lovell’s name for the orphanage, which suffered very little damage, except a few more broken windows. The building was newer and it would be a safe place for the children.
Then she had gone over to Newgate to leave a check. One for Cecelia and one for the building fund. She visited with Cecelia and told her she was leaving. The child had had enough people leaving in her life and Rose wanted to make sure they would correspond and left enough money for a ticket so Cecelia to come over when she was old enough.
Today she decided to take the long walk to Ava’s home and found her there alone. Their house had suffered the most damage of any on the entire street. But her husband’s family money had taken care of that. Rose looked at Ava’s dark beautiful eyes and saw profound sadness. This friend had the house, the successful man, the best position in society and was the most unhappy. Ava was distant and on the verge of tears, so she made the visit short.
“Rose take care. I wish you the best. Little Carolina Jane is beautiful.”
Rose could hear the hurt in her voice. Ava wanted a child more than anything but her husband would not permit it. He didn’t want her to lose her beauty or be busy with other affairs.
“Thank you Ava. I will and please keep in touch. I’ll send my address.” Rose gave her a hug. “Captain Wyatt will come soon. Please give him my best. I will send him a note informing him of everything. I’m sure once he hears about the quake he will come to you.” She reassured her friend.
Ava nodded and turned away, shoulders shaking. Rose let herself out and walked slowly tucking every scene away in her mind to remember Charleston. It still lay in ruins, but there was busy activity day and night. She made a detour to have a look at St. Michael’s. Men were still working on it…the spire had been taken away for repair and the cracks were being plastered over this evening, she noted.
She missed her daughter and picked up her pace. The sun was going down and the soft warm winds made her melancholy. Ireland was so far away, yet seemed to be calling her. Rose could only hope her heart was right. She would have to leave Portia, Emmanuel and Thomas and Lily. She had asked them to come with her but they could not. Their daughter was in America and might need them one day.
Rose stood outside for a long time and then ran inside to the office. The child still slept. She pulled off her gloves ran outside and began sketching. One canvass, then another and another.
That’s how Captain Riley found her. Drawing madly with her charcoal pencil.
She was so busy, having found a thick fallen branch to sit upon, she jumped when he spoke not three feet away.
“Mrs. Lovell.” He greeted removing his hat.
“Mr. Riley, I did not see you approach.” She quickly turned the canvass over and laid it aside, pencils falling from her lap as she stood.
“You were drawing.”
He smiled but his eyes were sad.
“Yes, I’m afraid it occurred to me that I should render Charleston to memory while I can still see it.”
“Very good.” He said and gazed away for a moment and then back. Rose could see something made him remember his grief. The pain was apparent, for he uttered just a few words about coming to get her things on Thursday and walked away.
Rose felt his pain. She gathered up the supplies and took them inside. She had three completed and a fourth she would finish tomorrow. The minute she walked in the door she was greeted by Lily coming down the stairs.
She tossed her items on the foyer table and eyes on the outstretched arms of the babe, she ran for her and took her into her arms. Already she knew her mother on sight.
In three days they would board the ship to Ireland.
Chapter 58
Judging from the weather they should have an easy journey. The trunks had been safely set by the door. A carpetbag lay beside them with the clothes they would travel in. But for now, Rose was using every spare minute to sketch. Some odd desire took over her. She wanted to remember Charleston. Her first marriage. Her first home. The birth of her daughter in this home. She must create a legacy for Carolina Jane’s sake.
“Oh.” She set aside her work. “I must go see your mother.” She said to the child who lay on a palate on the office floor her fists swinging in the air. The winds blew the curtains at the open windows and Rose suddenly felt the urge to unpack and stay. What was that about?
Shaking her head against the thoughts, she hurriedly found Lily to watch the baby; then to Emmanuel to get the small carriage ready.
Within the hour she was standing inside the orphanage waiting for Matilda Jane to come down the stairs. She appeared at the top and Rose could see the change in her. They hadn’t visited since the day she left. The girl was slender again and her hair was swept up in a stylish coif.
“Matilda Jane.” Rose put out her hand.
“Yes.” She lowered her eyes.
“I have come with news. I am leaving for Ireland in a couple of days. Would….would you like to see your daughter before I go?”
Matilda Jane looked up and away and then back at Rose. “No. Thank you Mrs. Lovell. I cannot. I have a new life now.”
Rose nodded and understood. “May I wish you the best Matilda Jane. I….I…I thank you for your gift.” Her voice waivered. “You have my word I will raise her as my very own daughter.”
“That’s why I gave her to you Mrs. Lovell.”
“Yes. Well, then.” Rose smoothed her hair. It seemed Matilda Jane had made up her mind a long time ago. “Shall I send you my address?”
The young woman hesitated for a long minute. “No. Thank you.” She said and with a slight hug, turned and straight-backed, went up the stairs. Rose heard the piano playing softly as she stepped out the door.
* * *
When Captain Riley sent his men with a carriage for her trunks, Rose’s heart jumped about like a wild bullet in a fire. Her eyes shot here, then there, then finally at Portia who stood off under the Willow tree, what was left of it, and lifted the corner of her apron time and again.
“I believe all our papers are signed and delivered Emmanuel. She kept her voice smooth. Should you need assistance I will inform Captain Wyatt of our changed circumstances and will ask him to stop by. If that is suitable.” She added quickly. This was Emmanuel’s house now.
“Miz Rose…uh…ain’t no one gave me a chance all my life to be a man. To own a fine house like this. Folks’ gonna talk, that’s for sure. But I’ll stand up and be a man. Take care of this place and if you and Miss Carolina Jane come back, you be owner of this house again.”
“Thank you Emmanuel. You’ve earned this house for all those years you served. It is your turn to receive. And I am so glad it is you who will occupy it. I have enjoyed it for a season, but I feel the Lord is sending us elsewhere. May God rest his hand upon this home and your family.” She gave him her blessing and shook his hand.
Lily ran off in tears, after running up and hugging Rose and the baby. Thomas nodded and stood next to his grandmother.
Finally Portia came out from under the tree and had herself a good cry in Rose’s arms. “Chile you be like my very own. Now here you goin’ off so far and that little baby goin’ too.” She swiped at the tears with both hands.
“Now, then. You have a life here Portia. And God has something for you to do. Find out what it is and I shall do the same. Do we agree?”
“Yes’m we agree all right.” She cried out and enclosed Rose in her soft embrace for a long time.
“Now den, you been loved up. Don’t you forget Miz Portia now you hear? And when you write dem long letters, I be gettin’ Lily to read ‘em. Already Lily know her letters
thanks to Matilda Jane. And she learnin’ to read better ever day. She read that Bible to me ever night.”
Rose smiled and felt tears sting her eyes. “If you need anything, have Lily write. Anything at all Portia.”
“Yes ma’am.”
The goodbyes had taken so long Rose wondered that Captain Riley’s men hadn’t driven off without her.
She turned and was helped up while one of the young men held the baby and then handed her up. Rose turned to look over her shoulder engraving in stone the vision of her home, partly tumbled and crushed but she remembered every window. And had the sketches to help her never forget.
Chapter 59
Captain Riley was commandeering his ship. New men had been hired to handle the heavy load. There were only a dozen or so passengers that decided they would travel over rather than wait for the repair of the passenger ships. There was so much activity with construction supplies coming in now that people were aware the City of Charleston had been devastated by the earthquake.
She was given a large private berth. With so few passengers they would have the run of the main deck. The sun was just going down when they set off. Good weather was a godsend and Captain Riley knew to take advantage of it. Rose prayed God would carry them over safely.
The first day waters were calm but the second day had Rose in her bed with a bucket next to her. One of the mothers saw her dilemma and sent her twelve year old daughter to care for Carolina Jane. Every time the young girl lifted the little spoon to her daughter’s mouth, Rose wanted to heave. She turned her back and tried to close her eyes which made her feel worse. The entire trip was miserable. Green in the face from the smells of others who had the same malady just made it worse.
When the waters calmed Rose ventured up on deck and gulped in fresh air. Her knees were weak from lack of nourishment and the constant swaying finally sent her below deck again. Too many days later, someone shouted “land ahoy” and Rose felt tears spring to her eyes as she held Matilda Jane close and looked out over the waters.
“Ireland.” She whispered as on the horizon she could spot a church spire. A sign she was home at last. “Thanks be to God we are safely over.”
By the time the ship docked and all papers were duly recorded the passengers were released. Carolina Jane lay heavy in her arms as Rose made her way down the gangplank, concentrating on each step. She was still weak-kneed and dizzy. She had meant to use the time aboard to study the family names in her mother’s Bible. She had not been able to focus her eyes.
“Mrs. Lovell.” Captain Riley slipped by passengers to catch up. “I understand you did not fare well.”
“No. I’m afraid I’m not made for swaying ships on roiling waters.” She admitted, glad to be breathing in fresh air.
“Have you established connections with your family?”
“I’m afraid I have not. There was not enough time to send a letter of enquiry.”
“Then you must stay with my family.”
Rose stopped to catch her breath and the child began to whimper. “Sir doesn’t your ship need to be unloaded?”
“The crew is handling it. I am headed home to my family.”
She nodded noting the sadness in his eyes. How thoughtless of her. Of course he must be beyond grief knowing he’d left with his wife and daughter and come home alone. And now he must go tell his family.
“Here let me take your bag.”
He took it from her hands without waiting for an answer.
“Thank you.”
Rose walked on, stomach sore from heaving and legs weak from the long trip.
“Me sister owns a B&B nearby in Dublin.”
The man sounded so tired and here she was thinking only of herself. The babe was asleep on her shoulder now, but so very heavy.
It must be difficult to return without his wife and sweet little daughter. Suddenly tears popped into her eyes before she could process the thought that he must feel so lost and alone. His family had come to the States on their maiden voyage to find a new life. But to come back alone. She could only imagine.
She was so deep in thought that she didn’t notice he had stopped until she heard someone call her name and turned.
“Our carriage.”
He stood holding the door open. His and her carpetbags had already been tossed in the back rack.
“I’ll take the child.” He said and gently pulled the sleeping babe from her arms.
She managed to get herself up into the carriage and with relief found a seat. He hopped up easily and seated himself then handed her the infant.
Soon, the carriage was rocking and rolling. Rose tucked the baby in her elbow and pulled her close then her eyes slowly closed. At least they were on the ground and not rolling east and then west and then east again on rushing waves. Her last thoughts were of the earthquake rearranging the earth beneath her.
Something didn’t seem right. She tried to open her eyes and found they did not want to cooperate. Where was she? Last she remembered rocks were falling about her. The nerves in her body jerked all at once waking her. They were stopped. She heard voices. Soft voices. And Carolina Jane was not in her arms.
She slid across the seat and nearly fell getting out.
“Take care Mrs. Lovell. Your child is right here.” Captain Riley said from a few feet away.
Swiping her hand across her eyes to remove the dust she turned and at the sight of the little one chortling aloud, her heart began to pace itself again. She wanted to shout at him never to take her child without waking her first. But the joy and fear at once had mingled together.
“Mrs. Lovell, my sister, Ryanne.”
Rose nodded and wondered what she must have looked like. An orphaned waif off the boat, no doubt.
“And where is me wee Colleen?”
Rose froze.
She hugged her child close and backed away and turned her back to gaze out over the green hills rolling up and down, dotted with white rock. She lifted her hand against the sun and walked slowly, past the house and away.
In a moment she heard soft crying. Tears filled her eyes and ran over. And once they started they didn’t stop. They rolled down like two raging rivers. For her parents who were here somewhere, for her husband, for Matilda Jane, for Ava, for….for herself. She was even now looking on the land from which she came. What she had only heard about now lay before her. Something in her heart calmed. She was home.
Chapter 60
Before she knew it, she was further away than she’d thought. The thick grass beneath her feet and the freedom she felt looking at the glorious green hills filled her soul. Tired, she stopped beneath a small tree and let her child play. Somehow, someway she was going to make it. She thought about Captain Lovell and his gift to her. She only now realized how ungrateful and assuming she had been. If it were not for him she would not have the money to settle herself…and Carolina Jane here. She wished the little girl would have come along while her husband was alive.
“He would have loved the wee little lass wouldn’t he?” She said to the miniature smiling face that was looking up at her.
The wind blew her unwashed hair. Turning her ear, she heard voices carrying on the wind and turned.
“Mrs. Lovell. I must be about my business. Come. Ryanne needs a woman. Would you mind. She’ll help you with the lass and . . .”
Captain Riley walked away. His voice had caught…Rose knew why.
“We have work to do…baths and food. In that order.” She popped the tiny nose with her finger. “Women need their friends. And we shall become a friend to Miss Ryanne…or perhaps it is Mrs. Ryanne.”
Rose pulled fresh air into her lungs and found new strength.
“Come in Mrs. Lovell.” Ryanne straightened her back. Me brother tells me you have left Charleston for good.”
“Yes, we have.” She said firmly. “This is our home. I have family here.” Rose noted the woman’s eyes puffy from crying.
“And your folks come from County
Claire?” She took the baby from her arms. “Now ‘tis a bath you’ll both be needin’. Hearings from travelers say those ships are dirty places indeed. Shall we?”
Rose sensed she was talking about anything and everything but what her brother had just told her.
She followed Ryanne into a small room and saw a tin hip tub sitting in the corner. “Water’s boiling in the pot….you get ready and I’ll bring hot water….cool water’s already in there. You plan on a good soaking and I’ll wash the babe.”
“Thank you.” Rose felt her throat tighten. “I’m so grateful.”
“Ah now there ye go…we Irish take care o’our own and . . .”
Ryanne stopped speaking and Rose watched her turn, pull the child closer to her breast and walk away. Patrice and Colleen were missing from this house. And she and Carolina Jane were not the two souls Ryanne wished to see.
Rose undressed and all her dusty clothing went into a pile. She missed Portia instantly. She wondered if she had made the worst mistake of her life. How would she live without Portia and Emmanuel? And she only just arrived. Knowing her mind was too tired to process her thoughts, she slipped down into the water, recently warmed, and washed her hair then laid her head back on a folded cloth. Nothing was more wonderful than being clean. Which had been a luxury in Charleston these last several weeks.
When she heard the sounds of a fussy babe, she stood and dryed, then fished in her carpetbag for the one change of clothing she and Carolina Jane possessed. They would have to wait for their trunks.
The instant her daughter saw her, she began to cry. “Oh now…oh now…” Rose soothed. “We are overly tired. I have your spoon.”
She fed her freshly washed baby, still wrapped in a drying towel. “Now we shall get your clothes and you will sleep like the baby you are.” She teased. “See Irish milk is the same as ours.”
Rose made a pallet in the small room on the floor near the window and before she laid her down, Carolina Jane was already asleep.
“She is a beautiful lass.”
Rose smiled at Ryanne.
“Go on now and take a nap. I’ll fix potatoes and carrots and leeks for dinner while you rest.”