“What the flip?” I said. It was Christian, looking haggard, exhausted. Jingle bells! This kid was hard to shake. “Please don’t talk to me,” I mumbled, turning away from him. I started walking again and he fell in step next to me.
“I want to apologize,” he said. My eyes felt heavy. So did my heart.
“Not accepted.”
“Tessa, please,” Christian said, grabbing my arm and swinging me around. I gasped. He was still not allowed to touch me.
“Get your hands off of me,” I hissed, trying to pull my arm away.
His face twisted, but instead of backing up, he yanked me closer. “But ... you kissed me back, Tessa. You kissed me last night.”
He was desperate. The look on his face was absolutely desperate. I was nauseated by the reminder and the smell of spearmint that washed over my face. His hands had touched me yesterday. Ick. I pulled my arm out of his grip.
“Was it you?” I asked. Did I want the truth?
“Was what me?” Christian licked his lips, looking at mine. Gross! Dream on. His mouth would never touch me again.
“Did you send the text about Aiden and Chloe? Did you and your sister plan this whole thing?”
It only took a second for his cheeks to turn red. Carpal tunnel syndrome! That sneaky son of a biscuit. He’d sent a fake message. I’d been so stupid.
“Yes, but hear me out,” he said, reaching to touch my hand.
“Ew, no!” I pushed him backward, and a few people turned to look at us. We were quickly drawing a crowd. “It was you! All along it was you, orchestrating everything!” I was yelling. I was yelling at school and I wasn’t in the gymnasium. “I can’t believe how manipulative you’ve been. Oh, my word!”
Christian’s mouth hung open; he was probably shocked that I was screaming at him, embarrassed that everyone was watching us. But I wasn’t ready to stop there.
“I’m sorry,” he said quietly, self-consciously. “I just really liked you. I thought if you—”
“That’s not an excuse!” I pushed him backward again. He stumbled. “I’m so sick of you right now.” And I was. I looked him up and down, my purr transformed into a hiss. “I can’t believe your tongue was ever in my mouth!”
The crowd collectively gasped. Well, if they didn’t know about me and Aiden before, they certainly did now. It didn’t matter. I was done with secrets.
“Stay away from me,” I said in no uncertain terms. Christian looked crushed, and for a second, I felt bad about it. Like I’d broken his heart. But then I remembered how his hand had slid under my skirt as I cried. Jerk. Big stupid jerk.
I twirled around, turning my back on him, on the crowd, and I marched. I stomped down the hall and headed for Aiden’s class. He’d talk to me. I wouldn’t let him ignore me.
A few people whispered as I walked by. My reputation was ruined, and maybe by the end of the day, they’d know about SOS too. I turned down the English hallway and I saw him.
I saw the tousled blond hair and the long, lean body. Suddenly my urge to cry was back.
“Aiden!” I called. He stopped walking but didn’t turn around. My heart sped up.
I trotted ahead, and when I reached him, I took his forearm, turning him to me. His skin was so warm. Sweet kitty princess! I missed him.
Aiden gently removed himself from my hands. “Hello, Tessa,” he said looking down at me. I couldn’t read his expression, but he hadn’t shaved. He was sort of disheveled, and I loved him like that.
“You didn’t take my calls,” I said, my voice sad.
Aiden’s face twitched a little, but he straightened it. “I’m sorry about that,” he answered. His green eyes flicked to my Band-Aid. “I heard you needed to get stitches.”
He heard? Was he asking about me? That was sweet.
“I got one,” I said, trying to sound cute, the way he used to like me.
Aiden chewed on his lip, watching me, calm and collected. “Tessa,” he said, dropping his eyes. “I think I need a break.”
The bell rang, sending students running past us in the hallway. But Aiden and I stood there, staring at each other. It got very quiet, and I could barely breathe. “A break?”
Aiden looked down at my lips but then clenched his jaw and looked past me. I wondered if he was imagining Christian’s mouth there. “I can’t be with you anymore,” he said. “Not after ... everything. All the lies.” He shook his head.
“But—”
“It’s over. I’m sorry.” He wouldn’t look at me.
I didn’t want to cry in the middle of the hallway, but I felt like I needed to defend myself. I wanted Aiden to understand. “We started SOS with good intentions, Aiden. They were cheating. All those guys were cheating, don’t you see that?”
He snapped his green eyes to mine, pulling back his mouth in a sneer. “And you were spying, sneaking around. Why was it your business? It wasn’t. You had no right.”
Ouch. There was a pain growing in my chest, getting deep and heavy. “I still love you, though.”
Aiden blinked and sniffled once before looking away. “Yeah, well. It’s not just about you anymore.”
“Don’t,” I said, but when I reached for him, he stepped back. Away from me.
I blinked rapidly, trying to keep the tears from spilling. I needed to go home now. My life had just been thoroughly thrashed. Aiden didn’t want me. The boy didn’t want me anymore.
“I’ll see you around, ba ... Tessa,” he murmured.
I felt absolutely defeated. Aiden turned and slowly began to walk down the empty hall, dragging his sneakers on the linoleum. I stared after him, no longer needing to hold back my tears. Just as I closed my eyes, they leaked down my cheeks. I wasn’t sure how to do this. How to properly grieve for him. Cookies and ice cream couldn’t solve this problem. I wasn’t sure anything could.
Christian started calling my cell, but I didn’t answer. He didn’t deserve that satisfaction. I deleted his messages before listening to them. I was sure that the Smitten Kittens were trying to keep SOS alive without me, especially Leona, but I’d given up all control. I’d barely been showing up for practice. I’d even missed last week’s game.
Aiden didn’t sit at our lunch table anymore. He sat with Darren and the team. I stared at him sometimes, but he didn’t look back. He just kept his head down and chewed his food. He looked as sad as I felt.
He really was taking a break. He wouldn’t take my calls. His mother had begun chatting with me on the phone, though, mostly about school stuff. She didn’t ask if Aiden and I were officially over; she probably didn’t need to. Obviously he didn’t want to talk to me.
Christian and Chloe kept quiet about SOS. I wasn’t even sure Chloe knew the whole story. But if she did, she was keeping her pouty mouth shut. Maybe she was embarrassed. Embarrassed that Aiden didn’t want her. Even without me in his life, he still didn’t want her scowling face.
One afternoon, I sat in the lunchroom, half dead from exhaustion. I’d been having all sorts of nightmares lately—ones where I was running around desperately, trying to finish impossible missions. The squad was with me, but my table was without pep. It was lonely.
I looked across the buzzing cafeteria at Aiden. At the same moment, he picked up his adorably blond head. His mouth opened as our eyes met, but then he dropped his gaze, staring down at his tray. Did he still love me? Did he miss me?
Right. He couldn’t even look at me. I felt seriously dejected. Alone.
Kira cleared her throat from across the table. “Tess?” she asked cautiously. “We’ve been getting texts. Ones for SOS. But ... things haven’t been going well.”
Leona snorted. I glanced at her and she widened her eyes, letting me know that Kira’s words were an understatement.
“How not well?” I asked, pushing my tray away.
“Um . . .”
“Like Izzie almost got arrested not well,” Leona spoke up. “And I broke my glasses.” She pointed to her newly unobscured brown eyes. I was ashamed that I hadn’t even not
iced that she wasn’t wearing her glasses. My observation skills had completely deteriorated.
Leona leaned her elbows on the table. “Without you, Tess, we’re a detecting disaster. In fact”—she pointed down the table—“Kira ended up making out with the suspect! Again!”
I looked sharply at my friend, but she shrugged. My word. The Smitten Kittens were running wild. “Look, girls. It’s time. SOS saved a lot of heartache, but at what expense?” I sounded braver than I felt. But they needed a leader. They needed me.
“He still loves you,” Kira said to me, as if she knew what my real trauma was about. She smiled, her dimples deepening. “Aiden will be back.”
She was a doll for saying it, but I wasn’t so sure. A guy like Aiden didn’t just walk around life single. Someone would get their claws into him. And they probably wouldn’t make out with another boy in a car in front of his house. They’d trust him. I wished I had.
“Tess.” Leona tossed a wilted fry at me. “Heads-up, Christian is on his way.”
My eyes snapped up. Pork chops and applesauce! She was right. He was walking right for us—his long-sleeve T-shirt wrinkled and the bottom of his khakis shredded.
I turned quickly to look toward Aiden’s table, but he was nowhere in sight. His tray was gone too. He’d left, and I was glad for that. I wouldn’t want him to see Christian and me in the same room, let alone within three feet of each other.
Kira coughed as Christian reached our table. He stared down at me, his hands in the pockets of his tan pants. I couldn’t even stomach looking at him. Neither could half the junior class. The rumors in the halls were that Christian had been plotting to steal me from the start. Some even claimed that Christian was a plant by the Ducks to thwart the playoffs by messing with the Wildcats’ star player. I knew that wasn’t the case, but I didn’t bother correcting anyone. I was glad he was a social leper.
“Tessa?” he asked with his quiet voice. “Can I talk to you for a second?”
“No. You can’t,” Kira answered for me. I loved when she got a little attitude. It was adorable. I smiled to myself and stared down at the table, feeling slightly better.
“Fine,” Christian said, sounding low. “It’s for all of you anyway. I just wanted you girls to know that I’m not going to say anything about SOS. I realize that what I did was wrong. I ...” He paused, and I wondered if he’d admit to everything he’d done. I leaned toward him.
“Look, Tessa,” he said, leveling his apologetic gaze at me. “I sent that text from Cassie about Aiden, and I’m sorry.”
My face became hot with anger. Leona growled from the end of the table.
Christian glanced in her direction and then back at me. “And Chloe was the one that called Aiden’s mother about him drinking. She also asked the teacher to set her up as Aiden’s lab partner.”
“I knew it,” I whispered, clenching my fists in my lap. Total scam job.
“But we didn’t do it for any stupid playoffs,” Christian said, his mouth pulled back in annoyance. “And Chloe didn’t just do it for Aiden. She did it for me. Things have been tough for us lately and she was trying to help.”
“Help herself to Tessa’s boyfriend,” Leona called out.
“She’s not speaking to me either,” he shot at Leona. “I have nothing, okay? I screwed up and I’m sorry. I just ... I just wanted you to know that.”
I didn’t know whether to believe him. When he looked back at me, I could tell by his weakened eyes that he was sorry. He definitely was. There was a small tug in my chest because it was hard to watch someone standing so awkwardly. I turned away from him.
“Okay, thanks. Bye,” Leona said. She wasn’t one to feel sorry for people, but that was okay. My girls had my back. I should have told them about what I was planning to do with Aiden. They would have set me straight.
Christian stood for a minute, but I didn’t look up until I heard his sandals shuffle away. He didn’t stay in the lunchroom; instead, he just walked out. I felt bad for him, really. But I wouldn’t talk to him again, not after everything he’d done.
“He’s still cute,” Kira said, twisting her gum around her finger. I looked over at her in disbelief. “What?” she asked, widening her eyes. “He is.”
Christian didn’t give up easily. He practically stalked me—again. Calling, waiting for me after class. It was all I could do to not speak to him. That was how I decided to handle it. I would never speak to him again. Mature? Not entirely. But effective? Most definitely.
Unfortunately, Aiden was using the same tactic on me. No phone calls, no texts, not even a note written on the back of a homework assignment. I couldn’t even figure out his schedule. He was never in the halls, and I never saw him at lunch. He was like a ghost. He didn’t so much as glance at me at the games. My cheer kicks were decidedly less high.
I was happy that I didn’t have to do any more spying for SOS—knowing that I’d never have to videotape another sexual act or hide under another restaurant table. Kira and Leona had said they’d handle the society, but after the mishandling of the last few missions, they’d agreed it was time to let SOS go.
Leona drafted up a final letter and let me review it before sending it out. Then we hid all of our old equipment and files in a garage at Izzie’s grandparents’ ranch. Even though SOS was gone, we didn’t have the heart to get rid of the stuff. At least not yet.
But my perk did not return. In fact, my depression seemed to deepen. I missed several practices and my new cheers were less than inspiring.
At the games, my parents’ signs became more and more colorful; probably they were trying to up my spirit, but it didn’t work. I needed more than glitter and puff paint. Instead, I just watched Aiden race up and down the court, successfully ignoring me whenever I was near. My parents only asked me about him once, and I told them the entire truth. No more lies. That was my new motto. Well, that and, “Can I have whipped cream on that?” This depression had earned me about five pounds of guilt.
Chloe joined a new crowd. She and Christian seemed to patch things up when he started sitting with her again at lunch. Her group consisted of other sophomores who weren’t nearly as moody as her. I hoped they could give her some guidance in the attitude department. She definitely needed it.
But the Wildcats played well. Our team had made the playoffs for the first time in three years, and as Smitten Kittens captain, that should have made me ecstatic. But it didn’t. It had been four weeks, and my ex-boyfriend had yet to speak to me. There was nothing inspiring in that.
I wasn’t sure I’d even be able to lead the cheers for the big game. I wasn’t sure of anything anymore.
SOS TERMINATION OF SERVICES
Dear Clients,
It is with a heavy heart that SOS announces the termination of our cheater identification services. Due to recent events and dramas, it was determined that SOS was no longer able to effectively conduct investigations.
Enclosed you will find a self-discovery questionnaire to help you decide for yourself whether or not unfaithfulness is occurring. But SOS urges you to always base your decisions on concrete evidence. Not hunches. And certainly not the hunches of boys that may have ulterior motives.
SOS is thankful for your years of referrals and donations. We hope that we have made high school a safer place for your hearts.
Best of luck to you all in your future romantic endeavors.
Keep smiling,
SOS
Text: 555-0101
Exposing Cheaters for Over Two Years
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
“IF IT MAKES YOU FEEL BETTER, TESS, AIDEN looks like total crap.” Kira smiled in a show of support. The gym was loud around us as the Wildcats raced from one end of the court to the other during the final round of the playoffs. But Aiden seemed exhausted, dribbling the ball with little oomph.
Luckily for Kira, my requirement for clean language had been relaxed over the weeks. In fact, every image-conscious thing I’d ever worried about seemed absolutel
y petty and ridiculous. I didn’t even wear ribbons anymore.
Cheering through the playoffs had been difficult. Good thing this was the last game. My self-esteem was in the gutter. I was a horrible role model, and worse yet, I was a cheater. Of sorts. I mean, sure, I’d been manipulated, but nothing excused the fact that my passion pink lips were on the mouth of someone other than my boyfriend. I’d even used my tongue. Gross.
I dropped my head, staring down at the shiny wood of the gymnasium floor. My pom-poms hung lifelessly at my side. There was no cheer that could help me now.
The shrill sound of the buzzer startled me. I felt the girls line up, poised to tell the Wildcats to attack, but I stared at Aiden. His hands were on his hips as he talked to Coach Taylor, nodding. He looked so cute in his basketball shorts. I remembered how much I always liked him after a game. All sweaty and manly. We weren’t as perfect as I’d thought, but we’d been happy. I knew that.
Why had I been so quick to think he was cheating? My suspicion had gone from zero to sixty in a nanosecond. Sure, there was SOS and the history of cheaters, but Aiden didn’t have a history. Maybe we really had simply grown apart. I sniffled.
I’d never brush his damp hair away from his face again. Or hear his tender whispers in my ear as he massaged my shoulders. I’d totally effed up. My life was a mess.
“Tess,” Kira called, smacking my shoulder with a gray and maroon pom-pom.
Right. The buzzer had sounded, signaling that warm-ups were over. I was supposed to lead an encouraging cheer. I closed my eyes and took a steadying breath.
I was still a Smitten Kitten. People depended on me.
There was a distinct squeak as my sneakered toes crossed the planks to the middle of the court. It was soon followed by the sound of eight other squeaks. I looked at the crowd. They were pumped. People had actually painted their faces to look like cats. Normally, that would have made me smile. But now, I could only force a grin.
I lifted my maroon and gray pom-poms in the air and shook them. The room quieted at the familiar swooshing I provided. I knew the usual cheer, but it didn’t seem to fit the mood I was in. Something about being miserable made me less perky. Then I began a stomp, soon to be joined by my squad.