“This is no place for her. She’ll be killed, or get us killed.”
I gasped. My jaw hit my boot. I bit my tongue from spitting rash words.
You dolt. You do not know me.
Father would not approve. No lady of grace and dignity would say such things. Though at times I did not act like a lady, I had a reputation to uphold for my parents’ sake.
William watched me as if deep in thought. Why was he taking so long to answer? He’d seen my skill with weapons. Surely he knew I would take care of myself and would not be a burden to them.
My heart raced faster, waiting for his answer. If he’d said no, I would still go, but I would ride behind them without their knowledge. No! I would defend myself. I would say something. I had every right. My father’s life was at stake, and I’d be damned if I wasn’t there to help him.
No man will stop me. No man. Not now. Not ever.
“She is a girl, but I assure you, she is no ordinary girl.”
William’s words made me smile, and I showed all of my teeth to the red hair man. The man frowned. But I didn’t give a damn. He would not make me feel small because I was a woman.
Women have their own bravery. Mother’s word encouraged me, gave me strength to assert myself.
William rose from his horse to look over his men. “She rides with us. We have no time to argue. You come with us to battle the evil and save Richard. I do not care if you are a man or woman. We have the devil to fear.”
No one else dared argue.
I took off on my horse, leaving John and James behind to bring order to the chaos, while about twenty-five men followed.
“Look.” Jonathas pointed to the right to another town as we rode fast alongside the wind pushing us forward.
I shuddered a breath in horror. Smoke shaped like the devil’s hand with long fingernails reached for the sky.
It had begun.
Chapter Twenty
Home Sweet Home
My heart leapt. Flames in the distance sent smoke into a gigantic, gloomy blanket over the town. It only meant one thing: the town had been taken by monsters.
I prayed for rain. The swelling, cruel clouds and the freezing temperature all hinted, but none came. Perhaps God had forsaken us after all.
Thoughts of homes destroyed, lives taken, and people screaming and running plagued my mind. And then I remembered Aldwin’s and Peter’s guts splattered on the ground, their body parts strewn about. It was devastating to imagine the same happening to those people.
I had hoped Longinus’s promise to kill every human was empty, but the smoke over a far-away town showed he’d meant it. He wanted revenge. Perhaps he wanted to prove he was better than God.
No ... he wanted to be God.
I will be the end of your world and the beginning of a new one when I claim your land. I will be God.
Time was not on our side. The monsters might seek Jack’s town next. Hopefully, the people had listened and run as fast as they could, as far as they could. But my heart ached for the burned town.
As if Jack knew I watched him, he twisted his neck to face me with a small smile. That smile let me know he would walk the same path with me every step of the way. At least it gave me some hope we would save Father. Jack had a way of making me feel everything would be well in the end.
The wind favored us, giving us momentum as the breeze moved with us. The cool air brushed against my face and made my cloak flap as if I had wings.
“We’ll save your father, I promise.” Jack adjusted his rein and patted his horse, as if to let the horse know all would be fine.
He must have seen the worry on my face. I nodded, grateful for his words. Again, I found myself mentally thanking Jack. In my wildest dreams, I would have never thought he would be giving me comfort, strength, and the most important thing of all—hope.
When we were younger, I’d despised Jack. In days gone, I had mistaken Jack’s playfulness for meanness and spite. He’d pulled my hair, poked my side, and played tricks, making me scowl while he laughed. How wrong I had been about him.
Little Jaclyn, the one Jack fancied, Jonathas had said. Could it be true?
Heat flushed my cheeks every time I glanced his way, and I scolded myself.
As we rode together, behind the men, I looked at the past with new eyes.
“Did your mother tidy your hair?” Jack touched the long braid down my back with the tip of his finger. His lips twisted up at one side, and his green eyes grew darker.
I yanked my braids away. “Don’t touch my hair, you heathen.”
“You have no kind words for me? Perhaps you are ashamed because you fancy me?”
My face turned red-hot, and I trembled with anger. “Nay. I do not. You smell like a goat. Where did you get such a witless notion?”
I squeezed my fists by my side, ready to punch his face if he said one more idiotic thing. I looked over my shoulder to where James and Jonathas stood, making sure they could not hear us.
They chatted with other boys by the horses. Our families rarely met since we lived so far away, but once in a blue moon we would gather for a feast.
Jack’s eyes grew wider, and then his lips spread into a smirk. “’Tis true. You do fancy me, Jacky?”
Jacky? What a stupid name.
Though I’d die before telling him, Jack was handsome, and seeing him made my heart skip. Emotions I didn’t understand fluttered through me, but the thought of falling in love with such an arrogant, dumb boy made me ill.
Instead of responding with words, I aimed a fist at his right cheek. But he blocked my punch and spun me around so fast I felt dizzy. Maybe the thought of being in his arms stole my balance.
Jack’s chest pressed into my back. Even for a skinny boy, he had strong muscles.
“Next time you try to punch me, Jacky, I will kiss you. Mark my words.” Then he let me go.
I narrowed my eyes, and flared my nostrils in annoyance. “Do not call me Jacky, you dolt.”
Thoroughly flustered, I cursed at him and walked away. He wanted to kiss me? Just for a second, I wondered what that might feel like.
When I peeked over my shoulder, I saw girls surrounding Jack, talking and giggling, but he paid them no mind. Instead, he kept his eyes on me, and his gaze burned into my soul.
“We’re almost there,” William announced.
Home.
A familiar road greeted me, and the scent of heather spiraled through my nose, as smoke lingered on the horizon behind. Though the storm clouds had turned and shifted, getting darker, promising rain, excitement and the anticipation of seeing Mother coursed through my blood.
Angel felt the same as I did. Her head bobbed, and her gallop seemed more like a dance.
I thought of different ways to greet Mother and the best way to inform her about Father. Should I charge into the house? Should I wait for her to ask about Father, or just blurt it out?
How should I explain all these men at our doorstep, and how could I let her know I’d found out she was not who had given birth to me?
Please give me strength.
The sun dipped lower, almost gone, and the last rays showed me Mother standing in front of the door as we rode into the yard. Holding a lit lantern, she started toward us. I jumped off Angel and ran to Mother. She embraced me so tightly I feared she would crush me. Her arms reminded me she had always been the only mother I needed.
After releasing me, she scowled. “Where have you been? When I came home, you were gone. I have been so worried about you. I’d thought you chased after your father all on your own.” Tears formed in her eyes. “Don’t worry me again. We’ll talk later. There’s so much I want to ask. And you got a new cloak?” She admired it and then she turned to face the men. “Welcome, William and gentlemen.” She nodded, greeting them. “Luke has left. There are so many of you. How can I help you?”
William dismounted, dropped the hood of his cloak and approached. “We’ve come for supper if you have any to spare, and the horses
need food and water as well. Then we must be on our way. Do you know Richard is still at Black Mountain?”
Mother gave no answer, nor did her face betray her feelings. “Please, let us be warm. Let me get you some tea. Supper is almost ready, though I hadn’t expected so many. It’ll be simple, stew and bread, and small portions. And of course, please take care of the horses for your long journey. Come in and please tell me what you know. I’ve been praying for good news.”
When we went inside, Mother attended to the men while I went to my chamber to change my clothes. Dried dirt and mud caked my tunic and breeches. After I changed, I retied my hair. I thought about braiding it, but for some reason, braids reminded me of Jack.
I took off my boots, wiggled my toes, and let the air seep through. Using a rag, I wiped the area of my cheek Jack had tried to clean for me before, and then I wiped between my toes. Afterward, I slid into dry woolen socks, pulled my boots back on, and made sure to feel two beans under my foot. Swinging Jack’s mother’s cloak back on, I went to join the others.
The men sipped tankards of ale while Mother poured stew into hollowed out, days-old bread loaves. I helped her serve and placed a basket of fresh bread on the table.
“Supper is ready,” Mother said. “I’ve already eaten, so please, go right ahead.”
The house seemed even smaller with so many people inside. While most men sat on the floor to enjoy their meal, I stood by the fire to keep warm.
“Sarah, we’re on our way to Black Mountain,” William said.
Oh God, I dreaded the bad news to come. The carrot I’d just swallowed hadn’t been chewed enough. It felt hard and lumpy going down my throat, or maybe that was nerves.
“I am unsure how much Richard has shared about...” He rubbed the back of his head. “As you already know, Richard, John, and I were captured by the monsters, but Richard is still there. He sacrificed his own escape for ours.”
Mother busied herself by adding wood to the fire for a few breaths. Then she crumpled to the floor on bended knees.
“Mother.” I reached for her, but William got to her first.
William helped her up and held her steadily. After assisting her to the chair, he sat by his men. Then he asked a few men to get the horses ready.
“No,” she murmured under her breath. “How is this possible? Richard is a good man. He helps others. Why would God not save my husband?” She paused, covering her mouth. Her lips trembled, and the line on her forehead deepened with concern. “When I saw you, William, I knew you had come with bad news, because why would you be here and not my husband? I hoped to be wrong. I hoped to hear you say Richard”—Mother’s lips quivered, and she took a moment to collect herself—“was on his way home.”
Mother gazed into William’s eyes with such sadness. It killed me.
William explained everything to Mother: Their attempt to lure the monsters out and subsequent capture; how Jack and I had rescued them; that Father had no choice because the fire had prevented him from escaping. Then he told her about the beasts invading the towns. The whole time, Mother clenched her knees.
“Five men will stay behind, Sarah,” William said. “I trust these men. They will guard you with their lives. I believe you are safe, and the monsters will only attack towns where people live closely together. Try to keep the fire low and the lanterns away from the windows. The less attention you draw, the safer you will be.”
Mother looked at me with tears in her eyes, uncertain. “Jaclyn, will you stay?”
I wanted so badly to say yes, but I dipped my chin instead. “I must go. Father needs me.”
She did not like my response. More tears fell down her cheeks. She was afraid for her husband and her only child.
“It’s too dangerous.” Her words came out soft and gentle, like her, like her heart.
I took her hands into mine. “Women have their own bravery. Those were your own words.”
“I know. I believe. But ... but ...”
Bravery didn’t guarantee I would come back home.
I blinked tears away. “Don’t worry. We’ll bring Father home. Father did not train me for no reason. You told me before, everyone has a destiny and a story to tell. Do you remember?”
She nodded, sniffing. “Fate will lead you to a path on which you are meant to be.”
“This is my destiny. This is my story.” I knew this to be my fate in every vein, bone, muscle, and in my soul.
Mother’s silence told me she believed in my fate, too. And thinking of Father’s tale of how the lance and I had come to his doorstep, I knew I had to take the lance with me.
I had not yet even begun to understand, but the lance and I were one. Visions of Longinus and the monsters appeared when I touched the tip, and fate had set its course.
She wiped away her tears and stroked my hair. The love she carried for me showed through her glassy eyes—strong and unyielding. “May God watch over all of you. Please, stay safe.”
“I will.” I kissed her cheek.
I could not keep my promise. I had a slim chance of returning. However, I needed to have hope. I’d escaped from the monsters once. I could do it again.
William stood and walked to the door. “We can’t waste any more time, Sarah. I’m sorry to bring you bad news and have to run.”
Mother pressed her dress down, her fingers working over folds and wrinkles. “It must be done. Please bring my family back home safely, as well as Jack and your men.”
“I will do my best.” He bowed slightly with his hat to his chest. “Thank you for welcoming us into your home and feeding us supper on such short notice.”
“It was my pleasure. It’s not enough to make your bellies full, but hopefully it will tide you over until the next meal. I will pray for everyone.” Mother crossed her arms. Then, with tears in her eyes, she wrapped her arms around me. “Jaclyn. My Jaclyn. Please be safe and come back to me, and bring Father home. I cannot bear to lose either of you.”
“I will, Mother,” I said with conviction, but my heart ached.
I didn’t know if it would be the last time I would see her. Inhaling her scent of fresh baked bread and stew, I took a moment to memorize the warmth and love of her embrace. I would carry it with me to give me strength and hope.
I turned away, dreading leaving Mother alone. Hopefully she would remain safe. She had to.
“Five men will remain with you.” William pointed to them. “You know my son, Jonathas. He will keep watch.”
Jonathas raised his hand.
“Thank you,” Mother said.
I hugged Mother again, the longest I’d ever hugged her. Then I followed William’s men out of the house and mounted Angel. Mother handed me a small lantern, like the one she held. The lantern would come in handy at night.
We would pass a trading town before we reached Black Mountain. I wasn’t sure what I would find there, since it was the closest town to the mountain, but I had a feeling it wasn’t going to be pleasant.
“Wait. I need to get something from the barn. I shall be back.” I did not give anyone a chance to utter a word of protest. I guided Angel there. After entering the barn, I dismounted and went to Daniel.
“Hi there, Daniel. I wish to take something, so I’m going to come in.”
I moved past him to the secret storage place. When I opened it, the only weapon left was the lance. I had hoped by some miracle there would be other swords and daggers too. I had already taken the daggers, but having another weapon would give me an advantage, especially something longer. Releasing a heavy sigh, I picked up the lance.
“You and I have things to do,” I said to the lance. “I do not know what that might be, but I have a feeling it’s something glorious. It must be. I was born of Mary Magdalene’s blood.”
I tried to hide the lance when I got back on Angel, but there was no disguising it. Nobody gave me a hard time about it except for Jack, who cocked a brow.
“Really? It’s twice your size.”
“It is no
t.”
“Would you like me to hold it for you?” He guided his horse around Angel and examined the lance I’d tied along her length.
“No, thank you. It’s not heavy.”
“Let’s go,” William said. He gave Mother one last nod and kicked his horse forward.
“Be safe.” Mother let out a soft whimper and wiped her tears.
I waved to her, smiling through a shattered heart. She must know half my heart wished to stay with her. I needed to be brave, to let her know everything would be well.
Breaking down in front of her would crush her heart even more. It took every ounce of my will to keep myself together. I had to be strong.
Biting my lips, I recalled mother’s words. I would hold them to my heart as I faced the monsters.
Chapter Twenty-One
Monsters Everywhere
When the moon shone fullest, round like a wagon’s wheel, and the shimmering stars graced us with their presence, the night sky took my breath away. Father used to say the stars were angels’ eyes.
During the sweltering summer nights, I would sit on the porch and gaze at the sky. Mother would bring out pie, and I would sing songs. My parents would laugh at the stories I told. For the first time in my life, I turned away from the sky. I saw no beauty there—only pain, grief, and death.
Thick, ominous, clouds followed us, like the devil creeping near. Every part of me screamed not to march forward but I had no choice. I journeyed for what seemed like weeks, but when my legs urged me to stretch and my body begged to retire to my chamber, then I knew we were almost there.
My nightmare had come alive. I needed no lantern to see what waited ahead. The fire still raged in small remnants far and wide, like dragon’s breath. The pungent scent of rotten flesh assaulted my nostrils, and the feel of the devil’s touch crawled along my skin.
I rode faster.
Angel protested the closer we approached, but I urged her to continue and she eventually gave way. Screams and shouts of agony rode the billowing smoke.
I became like stone. Terrified, I followed Jack into the smoke.