CHAPTER TWENTY.
OUR LAST ADVENTURE NOT FATAL--TAKE TO MY GROG KINDLY--GROG MAKES ME AVERY UNKIND RETURN--OLD TOM AT HIS YARNS AGAIN--HOW TO PUT YOUR FOOT INA MISCHIEF, WITHOUT HAVING A HAND IN IT--CANDIDATES FOR THECAT-O'-NINE-TAILS.
We soon recovered the road, and in half-an-hour we were at PutneyBridge; cold, wet, and tired, but not so bad as when we were stationaryunder the gallows; the quick walking restored the circulation. Tom wentin for the bottle of spirits, while I went for the sculls and carriedthem down to the boat, which was high and dry, and nearly up to thethwarts with snow. When Tom joined me, he appeared with two bottlesunder his arms. "I have taken another upon tick, Jacob," said he, "forI'm sure we want it, and so will father say, when he hears our story."We launched our boat, and in a couple of minutes were close to thelighter, on the deck of which stood old Tom.
"Boat ahoy! is that you, lads?" cried he.
"Yes, father, all's right," replied Tom, as we laid in our oars.
"Thank God!" replied the old man. "Boys, boys, how you frightened me?where have you been? I thought you had met with some disaster. Howhave I been peeping through the snow-storm these last two hours,watching for the boat, and I'm as wet as a shag and as cold as charity.What has been the matter? Did you bring the bottle, Tom?"
"Yes, father; brought two, for we shall want them to-night if we gowithout for a week; but we must all get on dry rigging as fast aspossible, and then you shall have the story of our cruise."
In a few minutes we had changed our wet clothes and were seated at thecabin-table, eating our supper, and narrating our adventures to the oldman. Tommy, poor fellow, had his share, and now lay snoring at ourfeet, as the bottles and pannikins were placed upon the little table.
"Come, Jacob, a drop will do you good," said old Tom, filling me one ofthe pannikins. "A'ter all, it's much better being snug here in thislittle cabin than shivering with fear and cold under old Abershaw'sgallows; and Tom, you scamp, if ever you go gunning again I'lldisinherit you."
"What have you got to leave, father, except your wooden legs?" repliedTom. "Your's would be but a _wooden-leg_-acy."
"How do you know but what I can `_post the coal_?'"
"So you will, if I boil a pot o' 'tatoes with your legacy--but it willonly be char-coal."
"Well, I believe you are about right, Tom; still, somehow or other, theold woman always picks out a piece or two of gold when I'm ratherpuzzled how to raise the wind. I never keeps no 'count with her. If Ifollow my legs before she, I hope the old soul will have savedsomething; for you know when a man goes to kingdom come, his pensiongoes with him. However, let me only hold on another five years, andthen you'll not see her want; will you, Tom?"
"No, father; I'll sell myself to the king, and stand to be shot at, at ashilling a day, and give the old woman half."
"Well, Tom, 'tis but natural for a man to wish to serve his country; sohere's to you, my lad, and may you never do worse! Jacob, do you thinkof going on board of a man-of-war?"
"I'd like to serve my apprenticeship first, and then I don't care howsoon."
"Well, my boy, you'll meet more fair play on board of a king's ship thanyou have from those on shore."
"I should hope so," replied I, bitterly.
"I hope to see you a man before I die, yet, Jacob. I shall very soon belaid up in ordinary--my toes pain me a good deal lately!"
"Your toes!" cried Tom and I both at once.
"Yes, boys; you may think it odd, but sometimes I feel them just asplain as if they were now on, instead of being long ago in some shark'smaw. At nights I has the cramp in them till it almost makes me hallooout with pain. It's a hard thing, when one has lost the sarvice of hislegs, that all the feelings should remain. The doctor says as how it'snarvous. Come, Jacob, shove in your pannikin. You seem to take it morekindly than you did."
"Yes," replied I, "I begin to like grog now." The _now_, however, mightbe comprehended within the space of the last twenty-four hours. Mydepressed spirits were raised with the stimulus, and for a time I gotrid of the eternal current of thought which pressed upon my brain.
"I wonder what your old gentleman, the Dominie, as you call him,thought, after he got on shore again," said old Tom. "He seemed to bemighty cut up. I suppose you'll give him a hail, Jacob?"
"No," replied I, "I shall not go near him, nor any one else, if I canhelp it. Mr Drummond may think I wish to make it up again. I've donewith the shore. I only wish I knew what is to become of me; for youknow I am not to serve in the lighter with you."
"Suppose Tom and I look out for another craft, Jacob? I care nothingfor Mr Drummond. He said t'other day I was a drunken old swab--forwhich, with my sarvice to him, he lies. A drunken fellow is one whocan't, for the soul of him, keep from liquor when he can get it, andwho's overtaken before he is aware of it. Now that's not the case withme; I keep sober when there's work to be done; and when I knows thateverything is safe under hatches, and no fear of nothing, why then Igets drunk like a rational being, with my eyes open--'cause why?--'causeI chooses."
"That's exactly my notion of the thing," observed Tom, draining hispannikin, and handing it over to his father for a fresh supply.
"Mind you keep to that notion, Tom, when you gets in the king's sarvice,that's all; or you'll be sure to have your back scratched, which Iunderstand is no joke after all. Yet I do remember once, in a ship Iwas in, when half-a-dozen fellows were all fighting who should beflogged."
"Pray give us that yarn, father; but before you begin just fill mypannikin. I shoved it over half-an-hour ago, just by way of a hint."
"Well then," said old Tom, pouring out some spirits into Tom's pannikin,"it was just as follows. It was when the ship was lying at anchor inBermuda harbour, that the purser sent a breaker of spirits on shore tobe taken up to some lady's house whom he was very anxious to splice, andI suppose that he found a glass of grog helped the matter. Now, therewere about twenty of the men who had liberty to go on shore, to stretchtheir limbs--little else could they do, poor fellows for the firstlieutenant looked sharp after their kits to see that they did not sellany of their rigging; and as for money, we had been five years withouttouching a farthing of pay, and I don't suppose there was a matter ofthreepence among the men before the mast. However, liberty's libertyafter all; and if they couldn't go ashore and get glorious, rather thannot go on shore at all, they went ashore and kept sober perforce. I dothink, myself, it's a very bad thing to keep the seamen without afarthing for so long--for you see a man who will be very honest with afew shillings in his pocket is often tempted to help himself, just forthe sake of getting a glass or two of grog, and the temptation's verygreat, that's sartain, 'ticularly in a hot climate, when the sunscorches you, and the very ground itself is so heated that you canhardly bear the naked foot to it. [_This has been corrected; the menhave for some time received a portion of their pay on foreign stations,and this portion has been greatly increased during Sir James Graham'sadministration_.] But to go on. The yawl was ordered on shore for theliberty men, and the purser gives this breaker, which was at least halffull, and I dare say there might be three gallons in it, under my chargeas coxswain, to deliver to madam at the house. Well, as soon as welanded, I shoulders the breaker, and starts with it up the hill.
"`What have you there, Tom?' said Bill Short.
"`What I wish I could share with you, Bill,' says I; `it's some of oldNipcheese's _eights_, that he has sent on shore to bowse his jib upwith, with his sweetheart.'
"`I've seen the madam,' said Holmes to me--for you see all the libertymen were walking up the hill at the same time--`and I'd rather make loveto the breaker than to her. She's as fat as an ox, as broad as she'slong, built like a Dutch schuyt, and as yellow as a nabob.'
"`But old Tummings knows what he's about,' said a Scotch lad of the nameof M'Alpine; `they say she has lots of gold dust, more ducks and ingons,and more inches of water in her tank than any on the island.'
"You see, boys, Bermuda be
a queer sort of place, and water very scarce;all they get there is a Godsend, as it comes from Heaven; and they looksharp for the rain, which is collected in large tanks, and an inch ortwo more of water in the tank is considered a great catch. I've oftenheard the ladies there talking for a shower:--
"`Good morning, marm. How do you do this fine morning?'
"`Pretty well, I tank you, marm. Charming shower hab last night.'
"`Yes, so all say; but me not very lucky. Cloud not come over my tank.How many inches of water you get last night, marm?'
"`I get good seven inches, and I tink a little bit more, which make mevery happy.'
"`Me no so lucky, marm; so help me God, me only get four inches of waterin my tank; and dat nothing.'
"Well, but I've been yawing again, so now to keep my course. As soon asI came to the house I knocked at the door, and a little black girl opensthe jalousies, and put her finger to her thick lips.
"`No make noise; missy sleep.'
"`Where am I to put this?'
"`Put down there; by-and-by I come fetch it;' and then she closed thejalousies, for fear her mistress should be woke up, and she get ahiding, poor devil. So I puts the breaker down at the door, and walksback to the boat again. Now, you see, these liberty men were all bywhen I spoke to the girl, and seeing the liquor left with no one toguard it, the temptation was too strong for them. So they looked allabout them, and then at one another, and caught one another's meaning bythe eye; but they said nothing. `I'll have no hand in it,' at last saysone, and walked away. `Nor I,' said another, and walked away too. Atlast all of them walked away except eight, and then Bill Short walks upto the breaker and says--
"`I won't have no _hand_ in it, either;' but he gave the breaker a kick,which rolls it away two or three yards from the door.
"`Nor more will I,' said Holmes, giving the breaker another kick, whichrolled it out in the road. So they all went on, without having a _hand_in it, sure enough, till they had kicked the breaker down the hill tothe beach. Then they were at a dead stand, as no one would spile thebreaker. At last a black carpenter came by, and they offered him aglass if he would bore a hole with his gimlet, for they were determinedto be able to swear, every one of them; that they had _no hand in it_.Well, as soon as the hole was bored, one of them borrowed a couple oflittle mugs from a black woman, who sold beer, and then they let it run,the black carpenter shoving one mug under as soon as the other was full,and they drinking as fast as they could. Before they had half finished,more of the liberty men came down; I suppose they scented the good stufffrom above as a shark does anything in the water, and they soon made afinish of it; and when it was all finished, they were all drunk, andmade sail for a cruise, that they might not be found too near the emptybreaker. Well, a little before sunset I was sent on shore with the boatto fetch off the liberty men, and the purser takes this opportunity ofgetting ashore to see his madam, and the first thing he falls athwart ofis his own empty breaker.
"`How's this?' says he; `didn't you take this breaker up as I orderedyou?'
"`Yes, sir,' replied I, `I did, and gave it in charge to the little backthing; but madam was asleep, and the girl did not allow me to put itinside the door.' At that he began to storm, and swore that he'd findout the malefactors, as he termed the liberty men, who had emptied hisbreaker; and away he went to the house. As soon as he was gone we gothold of the breaker, and made a _bull_ of it."
"How did you manage that?" inquired I.
"Why, Jacob, a _bull_ means putting a quart or two of water into a caskwhich has had spirits in it; and what with the little that may be left,and what has soaked in the wood, if you roll it and shake it well, itgenerally turns out pretty fair grog. At all events its always betterthan nothing. Well, to go on--but suppose we fill up again and take afresh departure, as this is a tolerably long yarn, and I must wet thethreads, or they may chance to break."
Our pannikins, which had been empty, were all replenished, and then oldTom proceeded.
"It was a long while before we could pick up the liberty men, who werereeling about every corner of the town, and quite dark before I came onboard. The first lieutenant was on deck, and had no occasion to ask mewhy I waited so long, when he found they were all lying in the sternsheets. `Where the devil could they have picked up the liquor?' saidhe, and then he ordered the master-at-arms to keep them under thehalf-deck till they were sober. The next morning the purser comes off,and makes his complaint on the quarter-deck as how somebody had stolenhis liquor. The first lieutenant reports to the captain, and thecaptain orders up all the men who came off tipsy.
"`Which of you took the liquor?' said he. They all swore that they hadno hand in it. `Then how did you get tipsy? Come now, Mr Short,answer me; you came off beastly drunk--who gave you the liquor?'
"`A black fellow, sir,' replied Short; which was true enough, as themugs were filled by the black carpenter, and handed by him.
"Well, they all swore the same, and then the captain got into a rage,and ordered them all to be put down on the report. The next day thehands were turned up for punishment, and the captain said, `Now, mylads, if you won't tell who stole the purser's grog, I will flog you allround. I only want to flog those who committed the theft, for it is toomuch to expect of seamen that they would refuse a glass of grog whenoffered to them.'
"Now, Short and the others had a parley together, and they had agreedhow to act. They knew that the captain could not bear flogging, and wasa very kind-hearted man. So Bill Short steps out, and says, touchinghis forelock to the captain, `If you please, sir, if all must be floggedif nobody will peach, I think it better to tell the truth at once. Itwas I who took the liquor.'
"`Very well, then,' said the captain; `strip, sir.' So Bill Short pullsoff his shirt, and is seized up. `Boatswain's mate,' said the captain,`give him a dozen.'
"`Beg your honour's pardon,' said Jack Holmes, stepping out of the rowof men brought out for punishment; `but I can't bear to see an innocentman punished, and since one must be flogged, it must be the right one.It warn't Bill Short that took the liquor; it was I.'
"`Why, how's this?' said the captain; `didn't you own that you took theliquor, Mr Short?'
"`Why, yes, I did say so, 'cause I didn't wish to see _everybody_flogged--but the truth's the truth, and I had no hand in it.'
"`Cast him loose--Holmes, you'll strip, sir.' Holmes stripped and wastied up. `Give him a dozen,' said the captain; when out steps M'Alpine,and swore it was him, and not Holmes; and ax'd leave to be flogged inhis stead. At which the captain bit his lips to prevent laughing, andthen they knew all was right. So another came forward, and says it washim, and not M'Alpine; and another contradicts him again, and so on. Atlast the captain says, `One would think flogging was a very pleasantaffair; you are all so eager to be tied up; but, however, I shan't flog,to please you. I shall find out who the real culprit is, and thenpunish him severely. In the meantime, you keep them all on the report,Mr P---,' speaking to the first lieutenant. `Depend upon it, I'll notlet you off, although I do not choose to flog innocent men.' So theypiped down, and the first lieutenant, who knew that the captain nevermeant to take any more notice of it, never made no inquiries, and thething blew over. One day, a month or two after, I told the officers howit was managed, and they laughed heartily."
We continued our carouse till a late hour, old Tom constantly amusing uswith his long yarns; and that night, for the first time, I went to bedintoxicated. Old Tom and his son assisted me into my bed-place, old Tomobserving, "Poor Jacob; it will do him good; his heart was heavy, andnow he'll forget it all, for a little time, at all events."
"Well but, father, I don't like to see Jacob drunk," replied young Tom."It's not like him--it's not worthy of him; as for you or me, it'snothing at all; but I feel Jacob was never meant to be a toper. I neversaw a lad so altered in a short time, and I expect bad will come of itwhen he leaves us."
I awoke, as might be supposed, after my first debauch, with a violent
headache, but I had also a fever, brought on by my previous anxiety ofmind. I rose, dressed, and went on deck, where the snow was nearly afoot deep. It now froze hard, and the river was covered with smallpieces of floating ice. I rubbed my burning forehead with the snow, andfelt relief. For some time I assisted Tom to heave it overboard, butthe fever pressed upon me, and in less than half-an-hour I could nolonger stand the exertion. I sat down on the water cask, and pressed myhands to my throbbing temples.
"You are not well, Jacob?" inquired Tom, coming up to me with the shovelin his hand, and glowing with health and exercise.
"I am not, indeed, Tom," replied I; "feel how hot I am."
Tom went to his father, who was in the cabin, padding, with extraflannel, his stumps, to defend them from the cold, which always made himsuffer much, and then led me into the cabin. It was with muchdifficulty I could walk; my knees trembled, and my eyesight wasdefective. Old Tom took my hand as I sank on the locker.
"Do you think that it was taking too much last night?" inquired Tom ofhis father.
"There's more here than a gallon of liquor would have brought about,"replied old Tom. "No, no--I see it all. Go to bed again, Jacob."
They put me into bed, and I was soon in a state of stupor, in which Iremained until the lighter had arrived at the Brentford Wharf, and formany days afterwards.