“The Guaranteed Guide to Stressing, Obsessing & Second-Guessing!”
“Yikes!”
“Yikes!” Bethany mocked my apprehension. “If that’s your reaction, then maybe you’re not ready for this list.”
“I’m ready!” I insisted. “My brain is, like, totally, totally ready for this information! Even if my body isn’t.”
Okay. So I fibbed a little. If I’m being completely honest, I’m not sure if any part of me is prepared for what comes next.
Will I ever be?
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Keep reading for a sneak peek at
JESSICA DARLING’S
IT LIST 3:
THE (TOTALLY NOT) GUARANTEED GUIDE
TO STRESSING, OBSESSING & SECOND-GUESSING
Coming June 2015
IT List 3
The Guaranteed Guide to Stressing,
Obsessing & Second-Guessing
1. Early bloomers have it bad.
2. Late bloomers have it worse.
3. Be a middle bloomer.
4. DO. NOT. COMPARE.
5. Remember: No one knows anything.
That’s it.
That’s IT?
My sister had really outdone herself with THE MOST USELESS IT LIST OF THEM ALL. (So far.) Let’s review each to-do:
1. THIS ISN’T EVEN A TO-DO. It’s just a statement of opinion. As a late bloomer, may I boldly argue that my sister’s opinion is WRONG. What’s so bad about being ahead of the curves, so to speak? I’d love to get all my growing up (and, um, out) over and done with before everyone else.
2. THIS IS ALSO NOT A TO-DO. I can at least agree with Bethany on this one. It’s no fun being the last girl in the locker room still waiting to develop enough boobage to fill the tiniest training bra.
3. Okay. This qualifies as a to-do. BUT IT’S TOTALLY NOT DOABLE. I mean, if I had any control over how and when my body would, um, pubertize (yes, that’s officially a verb now that I’ve made it up), I’d be finished with all this crazy body-morphing business already.
4. Um, let’s see. Isn’t this tip the complete opposite of what numbers one through three are all about? How do I know if I can “be a middle bloomer” unless I compare myself to the number of girls blooming before (ALL) and after (NONE) I do?
And finally, the fifth piece of nonadvice:
5. I ALREADY KNOW I DON’T KNOW ANYTHING. THAT’S WHY I’M CONSULTING THIS LIST.
There IT is, in all its uselessness. Then again, what did I expect? My sister isn’t premed; she’s flunking public relations. Sigh. That’s the last time I seek health advice from someone majoring in Image Marketing and Management.
So my sister’s guidance is totally worthless, but I’m glad I didn’t toss it out in frustration. As it turns out, the flip side could prove to be of much greater value. On the back of Bethany’s list is a fascinating document entitled “The Top Secret Pineville Junior High Crushability Quiz.”
Why do I have a funny feeling it won’t stay a secret for long?
Contents
Cover
Title Page
Welcome
Dedication
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty-One
Chapter Twenty-Two
Chapter Twenty-Three
Chapter Twenty-Four
Chapter Twenty-Five
A Preview of Jessica Darling’s It List 3
Copyright
Copyright
This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, or persons, living or dead, is coincidental.
Copyright © 2014 by Megan McCafferty
Cover photograph © 2014 by Howard Huang
Cover hand-lettering © 2014 by Alison Carmichael
Cover design by Maggie Edkins
Cover © 2014 Hachette Book Group, Inc.
Excerpt from Jessica Darling’s It List 3 copyright © 2014 by Megan McCafferty
All rights reserved. In accordance with the U.S. Copyright Act of 1976, the scanning, uploading, and electronic sharing of any part of this book without the permission of the publisher is unlawful piracy and theft of the author’s intellectual property. If you would like to use material from the book (other than for review purposes), prior written permission must be obtained by contacting the publisher at
[email protected]. Thank you for your support of the author’s rights.
Poppy
Hachette Book Group
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The Poppy name and logo are trademarks of Hachette Book Group, Inc.
The publisher is not responsible for websites (or their content) that are not owned by the publisher.
First ebook edition: September 2014
ISBN 978-0-316-24502-9
E3
Megan Mccafferty, Jessica Darling's It List 2
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