Fall set in unusually early this year with the cold causing trees to shed their leaves in a bright array of browns, reds, oranges, and yellows, mid-September. Ted and Alex had been back at school for three weeks, and life settled down into a predictable pattern.
Saturday morning, Jenny raked the leaves while Ritz either watched or raced through the huge piles she made. She swiped the bangs out of her eyes; she needed some bobby pins. Her hair had grown out already, making a respectable ponytail, but if she was going to keep the bangs, she needed to get them trimmed. They were driving her nuts. Fifteen minutes later, bangs pinned back, Jenny leaned against her rake and surveyed the yard.
She didn’t mind raking but despised bagging them, which was why a half-dozen piles heaped like enormous bright anthills littered the front lawn. When there were no renegade leaves left to corral, Jenny decided she needed a lemonade break before bagging. Maybe by the time she finished, Gabe would be back from the hospital and could help her.
She brightened. Maaaybe, she could pay Michael to bag them. He always needed money and it’d give her a good excuse to spend a little time with him. She’d call Mom if Gabe didn’t show up soon.
Once inside, Jenny decided it was close to lunch and she should eat before bagging. Then, the dishwasher needed emptying, and the dog pen cleaning, and...then she ran out of legitimate procrastinating jobs. She picked up her phone and called home, but nobody answered. She dialed her mom’s cell, scowling when it went to voicemail. “Nobody’s ever around when you need them.”
Well, that left... her. Dang. Jenny dragged an empty garbage can and a roll of large black plastic bags down the driveway just as Alex pulled in.
Saved. A good stepmother would put her child’s needs first. She’d be willing to forgo finishing this job, if she had to. Or she could get Alex to help. She snorted. Fat chance.
Jenny tied the bag shut and blew stray strands of hair from her face before greeting her stepdaughter with a big smile and a hug. “Hey, you. What’re you doing here?”
“Came home for the weekend.”
Suzy got out of the backseat with a baby perched on her hip. He looked so bundled up, Jenny doubted he could even wave his little arm. “Hi, Mrs. Harrison,” Suzy said as she approached.
“Hi, Suzy.”
“Suz wants me to go shopping with her, but the baby needs a nap.” Alex slanted Jenny a sly look. “You wouldn’t want to babysit for a few hours, would you?”
Not particularly.
“He’ll probably sleep the whole time. Please, Mrs. Harrison?” Suzy begged.
Be responsible for that little guy? Jenny looked from the pleading faces to the drooling baby. “I haven’t babysat in years.”
“He’s really good. He hardly ever cries, and I have an extra bottle in case he wakes up early—which he won’t. He always takes a long afternoon nap.”
“I don’t know,” she drew out, looking out over the yard. The leaves. Pasting a regretful look on her face, she turned to them.
“We’ll finish the leaves for you before we go,” Alex blurted out. “Besides, it’s good practice for when you and Dad have a baby.”
We’re having a baby? News to me. Defeated, Jenny held out her arms, half hoping the baby would reject her.
For one long minute the baby stiffened in her arms. He studied her through solemn hazel eyes, then yawned widely, laid his head on her chest, tucked under her chin. Stuffing his pacifier in his mouth, he sighed.
“See. I told you he was tired,” Suzy said.
Okay, she could do this. She might not want kids, but she was certainly capable of babysitting one little guy for an afternoon. How hard could it be? She’d put him down someplace safe out of Ritz’s reach for a nap... “I don’t have anywhere for him to sleep.”
“How about Steve?” Alex asked. “I’ve seen Sophia sleeping in a Pack ’n Play under the tree.”
“Pack ’n Play?” She frowned at Alex. “How do you even know what that is?”
“Suzy.”
Of course. “Okay. I’ll ask Steve if we can borrow his playpen, while you two get to work.”
At least she’d get the dang leaves done. Crossing through the hedge, the baby’s mouth moved against her neck as he sucked his pacifier. His weight felt strangely comforting in her arms. She knocked on Steve’s back door and tried to push it open but couldn’t juggle the baby and door. Jabbing the doorbell, she tried to peer through the glass, wondering what was taking so long.
Opening the door, Steve pushed a pencil behind one ear, folded arms across his chest, and leaned against the door jam. A slow, broad smile lit his face. “Congratulations. I didn’t even know you were pregnant.”
She pushed by him. “Funny, Grant. Do you have a playpen I can borrow?”
He ducked his head to get a better look at the sleepy baby. “Cute kid. What’s his name?”
“I don’t know. I’m doing Alex a favor.”
“Getting in practice?”
“Why does everyone keep saying that? We’re not having kids.”
Steve frowned. “Why not?”
She shifted the baby in her arms. Now was not the time to go into that. This kid was getting heavy, and he was slobbering all over her neck. “Do you have a playpen or not?”
“Sure, Annie leaves one here. I’ll get it.”
The baby heaved a big sigh, and the pacifier fell out of his slack mouth, hitting her arm before the floor. With one hand, she smoothed his downy blond hair and shifted him to see if he was still asleep.
She studied his little bud lips, fat cheeks, and down-swept lashes, remembering Michael at this age. He looked so adorable; she couldn’t help pressing a kiss on his smooth forehead that felt as soft as it looked. He must have just had a bath because he smelled of baby shampoo and sweet baby.
Steve returned, carrying a rectangular thing with a handle.
He took in the sleeping baby and automatically bent to pick up the pacifier.
“Great.” She nodded at the folded package. “That’s a playpen?”
He passed her and held the door open. “Come on, I’ll set it up for you.”
He assembled the playpen in the study. Suzy brought in the baby’s supplies and settled him in it with his favorite soft blankie and stuffed monkey. She popped a bottle in the refrigerator, showed Jenny where diapers and extra outfits were located in the backpack diaper bag, and left her instructions as if she were an old pro at leaving her baby, then breezed out the door.
Shell shocked, Jenny caught up with the girls as they piled in Suzy’s car. “What time will you be back?”
“A couple of hours.”
Okay. Two hours wasn’t that long. “Staying for dinner?”
“Nope, but thanks. Mom’s taking us out.”
Of course she was. How come Judith got the fun part and she got stuck babysitting? Judith was probably working. I guess heart surgery trumps yard work and babysitting duty. Jenny swung around. “What’s his name?”
“Adam.”
“Okay. Have fun, girls.” Jenny waved them away. Turning, she caught sight of Steve crossing back through the hedge. “Hey! Steve, wait. Where’re you going?”
Frantic to catch him, Jenny sprinted forward, tripped over Ritz, and went careening into him. Clutching his shoulder, she nearly knocked Steve off his feet to avoid putting her full weight on the yelping, scrambling dog. He grabbed her by the waist, plastering her against him before getting a solid grip and firmly righting her.
“Sorry.” Trying to sound nonchalant, she asked. “Soooo. Where’re you going?”
“Home.”
“What’re you doing?”
“Work.”
“Oh.” She seized on an idea to bring him back over to her house and the sleeping baby. “I was going to make cookies. Want some?”
“No, thanks.”
“How about a beer? I could make some of that hot artichoke dip you like.”
He frowned. “It’s only two, Jen. What’s the problem?”
“Nothing. No
problem. Why would there be a problem? I...just felt like company.”
“Sorry, I’ve gotta get back to work.” He turned and left.
Well, she huffed; he couldn’t get away fast enough. Feeling slightly rejected, Jenny walked back inside, careful not to let the door slam. Was Steve mad at her? All she’d wanted was a little company. It wasn’t like she asked him to babysit for her. She wasn’t a total novice with babies. She’d cared for Michael. A decade ago.
Maybe the baby would sleep the whole time the girls were gone. She tiptoed into the study and found Ritz stretched out in front of the playpen. The dog lifted her head and slapped her tail on the carpet in greeting but didn’t get up. Jenny muted her cell and unplugged the house phone so its ringing wouldn’t waken Adam.
She tried to write, but couldn’t focus on her article. It must be lack of practice that had her hovering over him. But he was so dang cute. Jenny finally gave up trying to work and settled in next to the playpen.
After a long hour, Ritz bounded to the garage door, barking her loud, welcome home woof. Jenny chased her, whispering, “Ritz, be quiet. No bark!” Jenny grabbed her muzzle and held it shut. “Shh! You’re gonna wake the baby.”
Darn. The baby couldn’t possibly have slept through that racket. Jenny hurried back to the study where he lay whimpering, looking around at the strange room through wide, curious eyes.
Ritz trotted back into the study, ears cocked, tilting her golden head as if trying to understand this new little creature. Jenny lifted him and gently patted his back. She glared at the dog. “See what you did? Big mouth.”
Gabe found them, gave her a kiss, then braced a hand on the baby’s back and smiled. “Who’s this?”
“Adam, Suzy’s baby. Alex stopped by for a visit, and somehow I got stuck babysitting.”
“The yard looks great.”
“Had to get something out of the deal.” She reached into the diaper bag, pulled out a fresh diaper, and handed both it and the baby to Gabe. “Here, change him while I warm his bottle, please.”
Gabe backed away and shook his head. “No thanks, I’ve changed more than my share of diapers, but I’ll warm the bottle for you.”
Jenny stuck her tongue out. She followed Gabe to the kitchen and spread the baby’s blanket on the kitchen table and changed his dirty diaper. Gabe took the bottle out of the fridge and put it in the microwave for ten seconds. When the timer chimed, he took the bottle out, shook it before dribbling some milk on his wrist to check the temperature. He popped it back in the microwave for a few seconds.
Taking advantage of Gabe’s empty hands, Jenny thrust the clean baby at him. If she needed practice for the children they weren’t going to have, so did he. “Hang on to him while I take this to the garbage. I don’t want it smelling up the house.”
Or maybe he didn’t. Jenny came back inside to find Gabe handling Adam like a pro. He bounced the little guy on his lap while telling Jenny about his day, all the while smiling and looking at the baby, letting him think Gabe was talking to him. That must be how he was with Ted as a baby.
And the baby responded to Gabe, too, as if they’d always been great buddies instead of strangers. Were all babies that amiable? Jenny scrubbed her hands, dried them, then retrieved his bottle from the microwave. She tested on her wrist like Gabe had. Lukewarm. Good enough.
Bottle in hand, Jenny watched Gabe entertain the infant until Adam noticed his food and nearly lunged out of Gabe’s arms in an attempt to get his meal. Intrigued by Gabe and the baby, she handed him the bottle. He settled Adam in his lap and tucked the soft cloth diaper she gave him under the baby’s full chin like an expert.
Arms folded across her chest, she leaned against the doorjamb. “You really changed Alex and Ted’s diapers?”
“Sure. Judith and I both worked. We had a nanny during the day, but at night I gave the kids baths while Judith did the dishes.”
Of course. Gabe would have been an involved father—even before it was commonplace. Jenny sat at the table and watched. Gabe took the bottle from the baby, sat him up and patted his back. After a loud belch that had to have felt good, he settled him on her lap for the rest of his feeding. “Your turn.”
Jenny tucked the baby in the crook of her arm as Gabe had done, slipped the napkin under his chin, and held on as dimpled miniature hands grabbed the bottle and crammed it in his mouth.
There was a perfunctory knock at the back door, and Steve let himself in. “Hey, Gabe. You came back to rescue her?”
“Did she need rescuing?”
Steve watched her feed the baby with an intense look on his face. Jenny checked the bottle to make sure the baby wasn’t sucking air. Nope, she was doing it right. So why was Steve staring at her as if she was performing the most fascinating feat? She returned his look with raised eyebrows.
He smiled. “See, nothing to it.” Then turned to Gabe. “She was nervous about babysitting, so I took a break to check on her.”
“Nervous?” Gabe looked at Jenny.
“I don’t do this all the time like he does,” she grumbled.
“It’s like riding a bike. Babies don’t change.”
Steve stretched his rigid neck muscles. He obviously wasn’t needed here. “Everything looks under control.” Gabe was home and Jenny was preoccupied with the baby. “I’ve got to get back to work.”
“Got something interesting?” Gabe asked.
“Not really, but it’s my own case. See ya.” Steve waved over his shoulder as he left.
Once in his house, Steve let out a deep breath and fell into the leather recliner. He stared out the window into the darkening evening. A light snapped on in the Harrison kitchen. Jenny entered the room, and Gabe followed with the baby.
Gabe took a stool and sat the baby on the counter, while she took a brown glass bottle, probably a beer, out of the refrigerator. Jenny looked at man and child with an indulgent, tender look, even he could identify from this distance. She kissed Gabe, and then handed him the drink.
Stomach churning, Steve swiveled away from the touching domestic scene to frown at his cold empty room. He should’ve stayed away. She’d been fine without him. Gabe helped her. But he’d been drawn across the driveway by a strange undeniable force he’d been afraid to even suspect was Jenny.
No, it couldn’t be her. Jenny was, Jenny. One of his best friend’s wives. His bud; Jenny. Who he’d always thought of as a little sister. This sudden nervousness and compulsion, to be with her was stupid—and annoying.
He’d tried to work but ended up watching the clock for fifty-six endless minutes. His instinct was to stay the hell away from her until these weird feelings passed, but that was stupid. It was Jenny, for God’s sake.
Angry at his preoccupation, he’d decided to test himself by going back over there. He had to be imagining things. He didn’t have feelings for Jenny—not intimate feelings. That was ridiculous. But he did.
Standing there, staring at her cuddling the baby on her lap, he must have looked like an idiot. Corny as could be, the image of her and the baby reminded him of pictures he’d seen of Madonna and child.
When Annie held her kids, he never got these melting feelings, making him want to hold both woman and child close to protect them. Why Jenny? Damn it. She was no Virgin Mary, yet she possessed a goodness and innocence that entranced him. Damn. There was nothing innocent about these new feelings for Jenny.
Are you fucking kidding me? Why her? Not her. He bolted out of the chair. With clenched fists, he paced from the kitchen, back to the fireplace in the family room.
Earlier when she fell into him, she’d felt so soft and good in his hands the few seconds before he’d pushed her away.
She tripped on the dog, you fool. You shouldn’t have even had her in your arms, and you certainly shouldn’t have liked it.
But he did. Damn him to hell, he had liked it.
He sat and leaned forward to brace his head between stiff arms. His fingers curled into his hair, pulling hard. Fuck. Fuck.
Fuck!
It had to be a mistake. He couldn’t love Jenny—not like that. He was not in love with Jennifer Harrison. But the more he repeated the mantra, the more his stomach churned and his heart burned in denial.
Damn. How’d this happen? When’d it happen? He couldn’t pinpoint a single event, and no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t erase the memory of her body pressed against his and his ready response to her. He wanted her.
You jerk. Douchebag. She’s your fucking friend’s wife. What’s wrong with you?
Luckily, Jenny hadn’t seemed to notice anything had changed. That would’ve been the ultimate humiliation, for her to realize his infatuation. Worse yet, if Gabe noticed; what a mess that would be.
He looked back out the window into the Harrison kitchen, searching for Gabe, as if Gabe could have suddenly sensed Steve’s lust for his wife and was crossing the drive to pummel the hell out of him. He almost wished for it. He deserved a good beating.
Alex and her friend walked toward the side door, with Jenny and Gabe trailing behind. Gabe stood on the landing with his arms wrapped around Jenny, warming her, while seeing his daughter and her friend off.
Wife, daughter, son. Gabe had it all. Ritz chased the car, barking. Gabe even had a dog.
Steve could get a dog. But he could not get Jenny.
He’d just have to get over her. Jenny was married to his friend, and there was no way he’d ever betray a friend. He wasn’t that guy, and there was no way he’d ever put a woman in that position.
Okay. Okay. Not a big deal. Don’t panic. She’s off limits, and that’s the end of it. Whatever you thought you felt, you didn’t. You don’t love Jenny; she’s your friend. It’s that simple.
Annie’s single. She’s available. She’s sexy and sweet, and you love her kids. Work a little harder there, dude. She might be a good match for you. Introduce her to Mom and see what she thinks. Dinner. Great idea. Yeah. He sat back and wiped sweaty palms on his jean-clad thighs. I got this.
He’d been a professional athlete. He had willpower. He could do this.
He would do it. He was not that guy.
Chapter 18