She had no money and when the idea hit her, her stomach revolted and she shook her head against her knees. It was obvious that Eliza’s husband had plenty of money. For that matter, none of Isaac’s men or even Isaac himself seemed hard up for money in the least. Would they even miss a few hundred dollars? She would take only enough to make the needed changes to her appearance and then she could begin looking for a job. But that thought only dug the knife deeper and heightened her despair.
She had no birth certificate. No ID. No idea exactly how old she was. No clue what her last name was and no job experience, save being a veritable slave to megalomaniacs, and she hardly thought that kind of experience on an application would get her very far.
Besides, she didn’t want the kind of job that would only remind her of past shame and humiliation. Beggars shouldn’t be choosers. She knew that well. She recognized on one level that she should be grateful for any job given to her, but every single part of her rebelled at ever being treated like she was so much less than everyone else. Like she was nothing.
She closed her eyes and began to rock harder, her tears soaking the knees of her jeans. Then she frowned, recalling a distant memory. It was a few years back, one of the few times she’d been able to sneak into one of the elders’ offices undetected. She’d studied the layout and schematics of the compound, her best route of escape, but then she’d seen a recent newspaper and unable to contain her curiosity, she’d quietly and carefully thumbed through the pages, stopping on an article about more and more businesses opting to pay employees under the counter without requiring references, ID, work experience or even age. Who in their right mind would consider hiring her without knowing anything about her even if the pay was under the table?
Still, the idea was too tempting. It would be a dream come true. She could work until she had enough money saved up and then she could leave town and go anywhere in the country she wanted and start over where no one knew who she was or what she could do. She would simply be another nameless, faceless person in the crowd. The excitement that washed over her couldn’t be controlled or called back no matter how hard she tried. It was stupid to get her hopes up only to have them dashed, but she had to try. She wasn’t a quitter. If she had been, she would have done what the elders had wanted her to do years ago.
FOURTEEN
ISAAC had been so caught up in planning strategy and plotting their next move that he hadn’t checked on Jenna in the last half hour. As soon as the realization struck him he turned around frantically, seeking her out. But when he saw her huddled against the wall on the far side of the room, her legs drawn to her chest in a protective posture, his pulse sped up. And when he saw the betraying quiver of her shoulders, he cursed long and loud under his breath.
Her face was buried against her knees, her hair providing an effective barrier so her facial expressions were completely shielded, but he didn’t need to see her to know she was weeping silently, doing her best to hide her distress from the others. In that moment, she looked so alone and fragile, his heart ached and he vowed to alleviate the pain in any way possible. She was hurting, but so was he, because he couldn’t bear for this beautiful, selfless woman to suffer so much pain. It made him feel helpless and inept, two emotions he was not accustomed to experiencing in his line of work.
But she wasn’t work and she wasn’t a goddamn job. She was fucking everything.
“We’re done here,” Isaac said sharply, his gaze never leaving Jenna’s defeated posture, hating with every breath that she was silently crying and trying not to be a burden—a fucking burden! When in such a short time, she’d become his entire world.
When his teammates followed the direction of his stare, there was a mixture of softening and hardening of their expressions. None of them were happy that while they had been deciding their next move, Jenna had been ignored, sitting alone, frightened and vulnerable.
He strode over to her and simply bent and slipped his arms around her and lifted her, ignoring her startled gasp. He tucked her damp face into his neck so she would be saved the discomfort of the others’ concerned scrutiny.
“Shhh, baby,” he murmured as he carried her toward the bedroom. “Just let me take care of you. I don’t want you to worry about anything. You never have to be afraid or uncertain when you’re in my arms,” he said in a whispered vow.
She relaxed against him, her body melting into his as he entered the bedroom and pushed the door shut behind him. He didn’t release his hold on her until he eased her down on the bed and then he stood above her for a moment, hating to separate himself from her even for the few seconds it would take to collect one of his oversized T-shirts for her to sleep in.
He returned and slowly, so as not to alarm her, began undressing her. She swallowed, a small gasp escaping her sweet, puffy lips, and color stained her cheeks as she quickly wrapped her arms around her chest to cover her breasts.
“You never have to be shy with me, Jenna. You’re so fucking perfect. So beautiful you make me ache. I need to get you in something more comfortable to sleep in. The girls brought over clothes and shoes for you, but tonight you’ll sleep in my shirt so you know who you belong to.”
Her cheeks flushed again, this time pleasure making her eyes shine, and her earlier sadness evaporated as she stared at him as though he were a goddamn hero. Like he was the only man in the world, and as long as he was the only man in her world he could manage to breathe without the ever-present panic of losing her, of her disappearing from his world and taking every shred of goodness and light with her.
He knew she was his entire world, that no one else existed for him, but he had to ensure himself an equal place in her world and future. There was nothing he wouldn’t do to make her his, to bind her so tightly to him that there was no hope of escape for either of them.
With shaking hands, he pulled the shirt over her head and slowly dragged it down her body, his knuckles softly grazing the swells of her breasts. They both exhaled sharply and her pupils suddenly covered nearly all of the pale blue, leaving only a thin ring around the dark orbs.
Her chest heaved as though she struggled to breathe, but then he hadn’t taken a single breath since he’d bared her delectable curves in order to dress her for bed. His chest burned with the need for oxygen, and only when she was fully covered once more did he find it possible to suck air into his starved lungs.
“You need to rest, sweetheart,” he said as he tucked her beneath the covers. “Tomorrow’s going to be a long day and this might be your last chance to get a good night’s sleep for a while.”
Her expression suddenly became anxious, her eyes troubled, and she looked like she was about to ask him something but hesitated.
“What is it, honey?”
“Where will you be?” she asked in a low voice, her gaze skittering toward the windows on the opposite wall.
“I’ll be wherever you want me to be,” he said simply. “Do you want me to stay? Do you want me to sleep in the bed with you?”
She licked her lips nervously, sadness flaring in her eyes for one brief second. “I want you to hold me,” she said, her lips quivering. What was going on in her head? What could she possibly be thinking? It made him crazy that he couldn’t just make everything all right for her and wipe away every worry, fear or sad thought just by willing it to be gone.
“There’s nothing I’d love more than for you to sleep in my arms,” he said, tucking a finger beneath her chin and nudging it upward so he could claim her mouth in the way he truly wanted. He wanted her taste permanently burned on his tongue and her scent to fill his nostrils until all he could smell was her every minute of the day.
It took every ounce of restraint he possessed to break the seal of their fused lips. He wanted to make love to her so badly he ached with need. But she deserved to be worshipped and taken slowly, with care and reverence, when they had all the time in the world and not when they could be interrupted at any minute because their security had been breached.
Soon, though. As soon as they moved her to a safe place tomorrow, a safe haven so isolated and fortified that no one would be able to get within a mile of the veritable fortress without hell being unleashed on them from all directions. Once again he had Sterling to thank, and not for the first time Isaac reminded himself that Sterling was not at all what he appeared to be. He was a wild card who played by no rules except his own, and he took his wife’s protection very seriously and now had extended that offer of protection to Jenna. Isaac wasn’t too proud to accept all the help he could get as long as his angel wasn’t touched by danger or violence. And once they were safely ensconced in Sterling’s impenetrable compound, Isaac would claim what was his and he’d bind Jenna so tightly to him that she’d never be free of him.
He stripped down to his boxers, nearly smiling at Jenna’s shy gaze, full of curiosity and feminine appreciation. Her innocence enchanted him. He’d never put much stock in virginity. He didn’t have a double standard when it came to women having as much sexual experience as men. But knowing he would be Jenna’s first—and last—lover, the only man to ever possess her and be given such a precious gift, instilled in him a fierce surge of possessiveness.
His inner caveman came grunting and snarling to the surface, and he felt the urge to beat his chest and mark his territory. Repeatedly. He didn’t even want another man’s eyes on her, much less any other part of him. He’d never considered himself a possessive man but when it came to Jenna, the idea of anyone but him ever touching her nearly made him insane. And he didn’t give a fuck how it looked to others or what anyone thought. The only person he was concerned with accepting his complete takeover of Jenna’s well-being, protection, care and happiness was the woman nestled tightly in his arms, his much larger body dwarfing and completely encompassing her tiny frame.
“Go to sleep, baby,” he whispered against the shell of her ear, watching as tiny chill bumps erupted over her skin and danced down her neck. “Dream the good and dream of me.”
“They’re one and the same,” she whispered back, her breath sliding like silk against his neck. He gripped her tightly—too tightly—overcome by the sweetly spoken words. Words that gave him hope that one day she would feel the same savage need for him that had taken over him, heart, body and soul. But, until then, until she came to accept all that she was and would be to him, he had enough love, desire and determination for both of them and nothing in the world would ever make him let go of this precious gift he’d waited a lifetime to cherish.
“Kiss me one last time,” she said in an aching voice that unsettled him and immediately put him on edge. Something about the way she said it nagged at him and his gut clenched, a sure sign that something wasn’t right. But what?
Unable to resist her request despite the voice in the back of his mind telling him something was wrong, he wrapped himself around her so that no part of her skin was untouched by him and claimed her lips, more forcefully than he had until now. He absorbed and savored her taste and satiny sweetness like he was starving and she was his first meal in weeks. She whimpered into his mouth, moving restlessly against him, her movements almost desperate as she burrowed more deeply into his embrace. In that one sensual moment they were one person, not two separate entities. Nothing divided them, not so much as a centimeter of space existed between their flesh. Never had anything felt so fucking perfect. So beautiful and so very right.
“You’re mine, Jenna.” He whispered the words so quietly that they were swallowed up by her inhalation and were only audible to him. “I’ll never let you go. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do to get you back if you were ever taken from me.”
Jenna called upon the patience that had been so key to her survival during her years in the cult as she lay limply in Isaac’s arms waiting for him to drift off into a deep slumber, and even then she waited until she was certain he had succumbed to his own need for rest and rejuvenation before she began the agonizingly slow process of inching her way from his hold, holding her breath and going completely still whenever his breathing changed the slightest bit. When she was finally free and had gotten soundlessly out of bed, she hurriedly surveyed the clothes hanging in the closet, searching for what suited her purposes best.
After donning warm socks and a sturdy pair of hiking boots she exited the closet, and though she knew she should leave immediately, she stood at the end of the bed greedily drinking in Isaac’s appearance as he lay so still on the bed they’d shared for a few precious stolen hours. Guilt and so much regret overwhelmed her at the betrayal she was handing the man who’d been willing to risk everything to keep her safe. She wanted nothing more than to shut reality out and escape into a fantasy world where only the two of them existed and she could sleep in his arms, cherished and protected every night, but now she had to protect him and everyone else who were risking their lives to keep her safe from an unknown, powerful enemy who’d already proven the lengths they’d go to in order to capture her. She swallowed back her grief and steeled herself for what was to come and the pain that not only she would feel. She knew Isaac would suffer the pain of her betrayal every bit as keenly.
“Goodbye, Isaac,” she whispered soundlessly. “You were the best and only good that ever came into my life. I’ll never forget you and I’ll never stop loving you, but I can’t let you sacrifice your life for mine.”
Choking back tears, she turned and crept from the room on silent feet, making her way back to the large room where the opening to the sublevel was located. She held her breath while she slowly eased the hatch sideways to uncover the opening below it. Leaning down through the exit, she felt around until her hand bumped against the rungs of a wooden ladder that descended beneath the structure. Hastily she backed down the ladder, feeling for each step with her feet until she was far enough down to reach up and slide the hatch closed once more.
The darkness was eerie, and she had to rely solely on her hands and feet to guide her farther down. Finally she stepped onto firm ground and she could smell dirt. She stretched her arms out first in front of her and then extended them from her sides until her hands came in contact with a firmly packed dirt wall. She was in a tunnel. All she had to do was follow it to wherever it led and she would be free, her escape a success. And yet with each step she took farther away from Isaac, the more she was consumed with grief.
After what seemed an eternity, she stumbled out of the tunnel and into a grove of trees. She sped up, putting as much distance between the others and her as possible. She had no idea where she was or where she was going. All she knew was that she couldn’t stop even for a minute. She hurried into the dense forest surrounding the house, reminding her of her escape from the compound. After what seemed an interminable amount of time, the forest opened up into a clearing. She paused for a moment, frozen. While the dense vegetation was scary, the prospect of being in the open was even more terrifying. She needed to hurry and seek cover.
She’d taken only a half dozen steps when suddenly a large man stepped in front of her, halting her in her tracks. She let out a sound of fright and quickly turned to run, only to find herself surrounded.
“Well, well, well,” the man who’d been in front of her said with an obvious smirk. “This was like taking candy from a baby. You fell right into our hands, Jenna. I have to wonder why you’re out here alone and unprotected, but as it makes my job so much easier I’m not complaining.”
Before Jenna could process his statement, fire exploded through her body and she was completely paralyzed. Finally she folded like a puppet, her muscles jerking spasmodically as she collapsed. Tears of pain and shock slid soundlessly down her cheeks while she lay twitching on the ground, completely helpless as she stared up in horror into the very face of evil.
FIFTEEN
ISAAC woke with the immediate sensation something was wrong. He instantly reached for Jenna, needing the reassurance of her soft, sweet body. When his hand met with cool sheets he shot up in bed, his gaze darting around the room in search of her. The house was too fucking silent and Jenna not being where she should be immediately tripped his “oh fuck” button. He broke from the bed in a dead run, bellowing her name as the first strains of dawn began to lighten the house.
He charged into the common room and swore when he found it empty. He ran to the kitchen, a knot so big in his stomach he nearly threw up. Finding the kitchen dark, he roared her name again, and the sounds of movement all over the house could be heard as the other DSS members and their wives scrambled in Isaac’s direction.
“Has anyone seen Jenna?” Isaac barked as everyone spilled into the living room. Looks of dread filled their faces, giving Isaac all the information he needed to know. She wasn’t with any of them, and no one could have goddamn well snuck into the bedroom and stolen her right out of his arms. Which meant only one thing, and it was retold on every single one of his teammates’ faces.
“Fuck!” Shadow swore.
Isaac stood there in shock, not understanding what he knew had to be true. He was numb to his toes and he couldn’t form a single word to save his life. Dear God, why had she run? Had he been completely and willingly played? Had he been so wrong about her?
No way. He couldn’t—he wouldn’t—believe that she’d been one big lie, using him until she no longer needed his protection. He refused to accept that. There had to be another explanation.
He watched the others as a slow realization crept into their expressions and he wanted to punch something, wanted to tell them they were fucking wrong, until Knight quietly called his name.
He numbly turned to see Knight standing over the escape hatch in the common room, a grim expression on his face. “You need to see this, brother. The hatch isn’t fully closed, meaning someone used it since last night after we did a lockdown of the house.”
Isaac lost it. He slammed his fist into the wall, sheetrock shattering as a sizeable hole formed where his hand struck.
“Isaac, stop.” Eliza’s soothing voice sounded close to him, but he didn’t want to be soothed. He’d just had his fucking heart ripped out of his chest. Nothing was going to ease his pain or the tearing sense of betrayal that was like a knife to his chest.
But it was Ramie’s words he latched on to, turning to her the moment she spoke.
“I can find her, Isaac,” she said in her soft way, with eyes too old for her face. Eyes haunted by the grisly murders of the vicious predators she’d been victim to and played an instrumental part in bringing to justice.
“Ramie, no!” Caleb’s pained protest sounded. “Baby, please don’t do this to yourself, for God’s sake. You have no idea what you’d be walking into.”
Despite the brief hope that had beat in his chest when Ramie had first spoken, Isaac didn’t want her risking herself for a woman who’d betrayed them all.
“Caleb, if she left on her own, then what could I personally experience that would be so horrible?” Ramie asked, with the mild exasperation in her voice that often accompanied her responses to her husband’s concerns. “But at least I’ll know where she is, if she’s safe and why she left,” she said, directing the last at Isaac as if knowing all too well that he wanted answers.
Oh hell yes he wanted to know why, god damn it.
“I want to know even if he doesn’t,” Shadow said, irritation evident in his tone. “Not only do I owe her, but I don’t believe for one fucking moment that she played any of us. If she left, then she had a damn good reason in her mind to leave. I’d like to know what it is before we play fucking judge and jury on a woman we don’t have any business judging until we have all the facts.”
Knight shifted from his position in the doorway. “I agree. Not for a second do I believe she was playing us. We need to figure out what the hell scared her so badly that she ran, and we need to do it now. Where does the escape hatch lead to? For all we know, that’s where she could be now while we stand around wasting time.”
Isaac blinked, mentally kicking his own ass. While he was wallowing in fear, grief and disbelief, his teammates were demonstrating more faith in Jenna than he was. What kind of a fuck-up did that make him? It was his own damn fault she’d managed to sneak out of bed in the first place. She should never have been able to so much as get out of his sight.
Dane spoke as Isaac started moving toward the hatch. “The tunnel leads through a section of dense forestation and then into an opening about half a mile from the house. Shadow, you’re with me. We’ll check the tunnel and see if there’s any sign she went that way. The rest of you fan out and cover every possible escape route.”
His face softened slightly as he looked in Ramie’s direction. “A decision needs to be made quickly. The choice should be Ramie’s alone, and it’s worth saying, if we’d wrapped the ladies in cotton in the past like we keep trying to do now, Lizzie wouldn’t be with us today.”
There was grim acceptance on the faces of everyone gathered as Dane’s words settled over them. Caleb turned away, resignation clearly etched on his features, but pain and fear haunted his eyes. Beau and Zack exchanged uncomfortable glances, knowing Dane was right. Without the girls, Lizzie would have died in that fucking warehouse where she’d been tortured by the men who’d made Ari’s and Gracie’s lives a living hell. Isaac knew the sacrifice Ramie was making, and he hated it, but what other choice did they have? Would he ever forbid Jenna from using her gift to save a single one of his teammates—his family? Even knowing what it did to her? No. He wouldn’t, and now he understood Caleb’s terror and his fierce protectiveness toward Ramie much more than he had before.
“Zack and I will take the east exit,” Beau said, glancing at his wife, his stare a silent command for her to remain without argument. Ari rolled her eyes while Gracie followed suit when she received the same pointed look from Zack.
“You stay too, Tori,” Caleb said in a gentler tone to his younger sister.
Ari and Gracie immediately flanked Tori, each wrapping an arm around her slim waist, sending a silent message to Caleb and Beau that they would take care of the men’s younger sister. Caleb sent them both grateful looks before he turned back to his wife, pulling her into his arms and holding her tightly, as if he already knew that she would do what she must to find Jenna.
Everyone quickly headed out in their search, leaving Isaac alone with Ramie, Caleb, Ari, Gracie and Tori.
Isaac waited, chest tight and heart hammering, as he watched the silent interaction between husband and wife. Then his attention focused solely on Ramie, knowing how selflessly she’d offered her talents time and time again, but also knowing the tension it caused between her and Caleb. She was watching her husband, determination in every line of her body, while understanding and love for Caleb’s concern clearly shone in her eyes.
“Caleb, I can do this. I’ll be okay. I can’t live with knowing I didn’t help Jenna. I have to do this and I need you to understand,” Ramie whispered.
Caleb drew in a deep breath, but he looked at his wife with so much love and worry that it made Isaac’s chest ache. He watched Ramie with every single emotion that Isaac was feeling for Jenna.
“I know you do, baby. I know.”
There was a hint of helpless frustration in Caleb’s voice even as he conceded that Ramie had no choice.
“But if anything goes wrong, anything at all, I’m pulling the plug immediately,” he said with steely determination. “I won’t risk you. Don’t ever ask me to risk losing you. I won’t even hesitate.”
He sent Isaac a look of apology, though his words were directed at Ramie, and Isaac got it. He did. He had no right to ask another man to risk his wife’s life for the woman Isaac loved, no matter how badly he feared Caleb’s interference and Ramie being unable to locate Jenna.
“Do you want us to step away?” Ari asked, nodding toward Gracie and Tori as well.
“No.”
The response came simultaneously from Caleb and Ramie.
“Just the usual instructions,” Ramie said wanly. “Don’t interfere and remain quiet. Listen to everything I say and for any useful information.”
Left unsaid was that if it was bad, Ramie not only would have little recollection of specific details, but she would be completely incapacitated. She could even die, and that was what scared Caleb to death every time she called upon her talents.