*****
It’s kind of strange, standing here, looking at me, as my body drifts between life and death. My old body, at least, and I have to admit my new body’s a fair bit better, even though there’s not enough muscle and I still have to sort out my hair.
“Oh!” says a voice. I look round, see an older guy there, grey hair, glasses, you know the usual stuff, probably about sixty, bit stooped, bit past it. “And who are you?” I think he’s talking to me.
“Don’t worry, that’s Mark, the junior doctor I told you about.” Ah, Jane, hello. I give her my warmest smile.
“Nice to see you Mark,” but I’m not entirely sure she means it. “Glad you make an effort with your appearance.”
They both glance at each other, so I’m guessing this isn’t really good.
“Well, never mind” sighs Old Guy, “where are we on this one?”
Jane checks her notes. “We’re about to go into final procedure” she says thoughtfully. “Any thoughts, Mark?”
“What, like a prayer you mean? I’m not really that good at that sort of stuff… erm, maybe the old guy, he looks a bit religious…?”
“Er, no, Mark, I was talking about the patient. Any thoughts before we initiate the final procedure?”
“Ohhhh… yeah, course” I say quickly, “I was just, you know, thinking ahead. Erm, well, no not really he looks pretty gone, let’s do this thing.
Old Guy just tuts and shakes his head, he better be careful doing that too much. “Well, Jane, nice to see you, I’ll just leave you to it.” And without even looking at me, he’s gone.
Jane looks at me. “I really don’t know what’s got into you in the last few days, but you better get it sorted out quickly. You’re making no sense at all. You were one of the brightest junior doctors here, I could really rely on you, but since, I don’t know, since Monday, it’s like you’re, well… it’s like you’re a different person.”
I feel like I’m meant to say something in the silence that follows. “Well, maybe we could talk about it over a drink” I suggest smiling.
“Oh for God’s sake, Mark. What’s going on? Is everything all right at home? You can tell me if you’re having any issues.”
“What, you mean, like, in bed?” I’m a bit shocked.
“For goodness sake, no, of course not, I’m talking generally. I mean, look at you. You look like a mess. You turn up to work late every day, and I mean hours late, when you used to be so punctual. We could always completely rely on you. And you seem to have no idea at all what you are doing.” And she actually reaches forward and holds my shoulders. “I mean, if you carry on like this, Mark, we’ll have to consider our position. Do you understand?”
I nod. I have no idea what she’s talking about.
Jane sighs and lets go of me. “You can talk to me, you know, just don’t start asking me to go out for a drink again or anything inappropriate like that.”
Okay, well she’s hard to get. I can work on that. I give her my best smile and she sighs.
“Okay, well let’s just get on with this.” She studies one of the screens hovering above the motionless body of John Paris. “All signs as predicted” She reaches forward and touches a switch that says On / Off.
And the final, tiny light dies from John Paris’ eyes. My body turns to ice for a second. And then it’s gone.
“So” says Jane.
“So” I say.
“It’s done.”
I nod. Can’t help feeling slightly strange.
“Will you at least tidy up the paperwork for me please? Inform any next of kin that we can get hold of, stuff like that, you know the procedure… I think.” She glances at the piece of paper before handing it to me. “Hmmm,” she adds, “same birthday as you I think.”
“Erm…” I start
“Records Office. Go to the Records Office” she says. She glances at John one more time, then leaves me all alone with my body.