"I've been that guy," he admitted to her. "I mean, I haven't gotten anyone pregnant," he clarified, "but I've been a dick who only thought with mine. I don't want to be that guy with you, Serena. Let's forget the locker room, okay?"
She surprised him by tugging him in the direction they'd been going. "I don't want to forget it."
"Are you sure?"
"I've had an amazing time with you so far tonight. I know this part will be just as good."
"I figured there was a pretty good chance that when you saw the clothes and face paint you were going to tell me to forget this whole Friday night normal-date thing."
She looked down at her sweatpants, tracing the S on her thigh with her fingers. "No one has ever tried this hard to make me happy." She looked up at him, her eyes shining. "Thank you."
Five minutes later, they were walking into the empty locker room. "Welcome to my world." He'd never taken a girl here before, just as he'd never taken one to see the Ansel Adams photos.
"I did a photo shoot in a locker room once. They stuck me in an expensive couture dress and had a couple of football players hold me up." At his look, she said, "It didn't seem as strange then as it does now that I'm telling you about it."
"Those poor guys, I'll bet they were both in love with you by the end of the photo shoot." When she flushed lightly, he knew he'd hit it dead-on. "They asked you out, didn't they?"
"They seemed like nice guys, but--"
"You weren't allowed to date."
"No, I wasn't. But there's no one here to stop me now."
He'd planned on waiting until they'd taken off the face paint, but he couldn't keep from putting his hands on her hips and dragging her close. "Thank God."
He lowered his mouth to hers and kissed her. Tried to, anyway, but the paint started cracking off into their mouths the second their lips met.
"We've got to get this stuff off."
"No kidding. I'm really good at taking off makeup. Let me do it." A few seconds later, she was wetting a clean towel from a small stack in the corner. "Close your eyes."
Her hands were steady and sure as she quickly wiped his face clean, and by the time she told him he could open his eyes, his skin was back to normal. Before she could do the same for herself, he said, "Let me."
She closed her eyes and let him gently run a new wet towel over her skin. Everything about her was flawless, but he was always careful not to stare too much, not to let on that he was shocked by her beauty each and every time he looked at her. Not when he could tell that being the most beautiful girl in the world hadn't always been easy for her, and that it hadn't always made her feel good or happy. But here in the locker room, just as he'd been able to stare a little longer than usual as he'd put on her face paint, he was able to run his fingertips over the curves of her cheekbones, the hollows beneath them, the sweet arches of her eyebrows, and the sensuous curve of her lips.
He took his time restoring her skin to its usual smooth, soft glow. When he was done, he threw the towel into the linen basket across the room and straddled the long wooden bench. She moved one leg across it to face him. Her skin was flushed, the pulse at her neck racing. She looked nervous. But also aroused.
And happy...most of all she looked happy. It was how he always wanted her to be.
"Kiss me, Sean."
He slid a couple of inches closer and reached up with one hand to cup her jaw. Gently, and oh-so-softly, he leaned in and pressed his lips against hers. Their kiss was barely more than a breath against each other's lips, but he could feel the impact of it all the way down in the deepest part of him.
He wanted to take. Wanted to ravage. Wanted to possess. At the same time, he also wanted something he'd never known he could want before: for their kisses to be as emotional as they were sexy. And for each one to be more than just foreplay. More than just a way to tease, to tempt.
But though he could tell Serena was as affected by these kisses as he was, he also knew from the way her body was winding tighter with each one that she was hungry for more. He'd felt her hunger last week, too, but she'd hadn't been ready for more than kisses. And even now that he swore he could feel the heat radiating from her, he didn't want to make the mistake of pushing her too fast. But, he wondered as she made a little growly sound at his next super-soft, super-sweet kiss, could it finally be time to start gently leading them down the road in the direction they both obviously wanted to go?
"Is this how you want me to kiss you?" Yet again he pressed his lips against hers, no tongues, no teeth, just the sweet, simple pleasure of being close to her.
Her hands had moved to his thighs by then, and he didn't know if she realized how tightly she was gripping him, her fingers loosening every time he kissed her, then tightening when he drew back.
"I really like it," she whispered against his lips a beat before she surprised him by saying, "but I want you to kiss me like this."
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
As her mouth crashed against his, he moved his hands to her hips to drag her even closer. Instead of pulling away, she wrapped her legs around his waist and bucked against him as she moaned into his mouth.
Layers. There were too many layers of clothes between them. He didn't stop to think before he found the hem of her long-sleeved Stanford Football shirt and yanked it up over her torso. Clearly as desperate as he was to get rid of at least one of the cotton barriers between them she helped him get it over her head and toss it onto the bench.
He stroked her nearly bare back, only her bra left on her upper body now. She was so warm, and when she arched into his touch, he finally saw what he'd uncovered.
"You're--" Beautiful didn't even come close. Gorgeous was just a word. "A miracle."
Apart from that night at the frat party, she'd always worn baggy clothes. He'd been careful tonight to make sure that the shirt he'd bought for her to wear at the game hadn't been too fitted, either. But now, with her breasts swelling over the top of the surprisingly sexy silk bra, he wanted to touch, wanted to stroke, wanted to taste.
But when he looked up at her face, he could read every one of her fears, every bit of her hesitation. And he also finally realized that he was gaping at her like a horny idiot.
"Serena, you don't have to be frightened." Instead of touching her breasts, he threaded his fingers through her hair. "You don't have to worry." He pressed his lips to hers, slow and soft and sweet. "It's me." He kissed her again. "I won't hurt you." Their lips brushed, tongues licked, teeth nipped. "We're only going to go as fast as you want to go." He was reminding them both. "We can put your shirt back on if you want to. If you need to."
"No." She moved closer. "I don't want that. I don't need that."
"What do you want? What do you need?"
But instead of answering him, she put her hands over his and moved them to cup her breasts over the silk. He had to close his eyes, had to take a breath, and then another, to try to keep his shit together.
So good. She felt so good. Soft and warm and round and perfect.
"This," she whispered. "I want this. I want you to touch me like this. I need you to touch me like this."
Her nipples were pebbling against his palms through the silk, and thank God she'd just told him she wanted him to do this, because he didn't know if he was strong enough otherwise to stop himself from brushing his thumbs over both gorgeous peaks.
A low moan emerged from her throat. "Again."
It was just what he'd said to her at the Frisbee Golf course when she'd surprised him with a kiss, and he loved that she was the one saying it to him now as he cupped her breasts in his hands. She held on to him as he stroked her nipples so that they grew even harder against the pads of his thumbs.
"More. I want more."
He knew what she wanted, knew what she was asking for, but still he hesitated. It would be so easy, too easy, to just take and take and take from her. But it wouldn't be worth it if he only ended up losing her once the rush of pleasure had passed.
But then,
as if in slow motion, he watched her drop her hands from his and reach around to her back. He heard the soft click as the latch of her bra came undone, almost undoing him at the same time.
"Please."
She'd not only just given him permission to strip her bra completely away, but had also made it perfectly clear that she wanted him to touch her skin to skin, without anything between them for once. Not even the thin layer of silk.
And yet...he still didn't lift his hands from her silk-covered breasts. Didn't give in to the urge to see her naked chest completely revealed. Because for as much as he needed it, for as desperate as he was to make her his, he needed this to be about more than just two horny college students copping a feel in a deserted locker room.
"Why?" He knew he wasn't being clear, wasn't making sense. "Why me?"
"Because I trust you." Something flashed in her eyes, something that he thought looked like a lifetime of wondering about the motives of everyone around her. "You're the only one I've ever trusted."
He shifted his hands so that her bra fell in a soft heap of fabric between them, but he still didn't drop his gaze from her eyes. "I'm going to keep earning your trust, Serena, every single day."
Her mouth was sweet and hungry beneath his and when she twined her arms around his neck, the full, soft, sexy-as-hell press of her bare breasts against his chest short-circuited what remained of his nearly lapsed control. He couldn't stop himself from putting his hands on her shoulders and drawing her back from him.
His mouth watered as he saw that her breasts were as perfect as the rest of her. Gently, he moved his hands from her shoulders to cup the full, soft undersides. Her nipples were rose-colored peaks that tipped up slightly, almost as if they were begging for him to lower his mouth to taste them.
His erection throbbed almost painfully as she leaned in toward him, pressing her breasts more firmly into his hands. "I love it when you touch me. I love feeling your hands on me. My hair. My face." She paused to lick her lips as she took in the view of his big tanned hands over her. "My breasts."
He had to kiss her again, had to make sure she knew just how happy, how good, she made him feel. He could have waited longer for her to let him be with her like this if she'd needed him to, but he was damned glad she hadn't.
"I want to kiss you," he said softly. "Here." He kissed her again on her mouth. "And here." He slowly slid each of her nipples between his thumb and forefinger. Her gasp of pleasure rolled up from her rib cage and then through her lips. "But only if you want me to."
"I've never wanted anything more."
Sean's groan reverberated throughout the room, bouncing off the metal lockers. He'd barely gotten to first base and she was already just about killing him. His breathing uneven, he lowered his mouth to her breasts. Her nipples grew even harder the closer he came, and when he cupped her soft flesh in his hands so that he could slick his tongue across both peaks, she made a little whimpering sound that drove him nearly to the edge.
He had her fully on his tongue a moment later, first one breast and then the other. Laving. Sucking. She shifted her hips to press even harder against his and wound her legs tightly around him so that they were full-on grinding against each other. Everything was a blur as he laid her back on the bench, one hand behind her spine to cushion it, the other still playing with her breasts, wet now from his tongue.
If he'd been able to think straight, maybe he could have stopped himself from sliding his hand down her stomach, past her belly button, and beneath the fabric of her sweatpants. But there was nothing left for Sean in that moment but how good she tasted and smelled, the sweet little sounds she made as she took everything he was giving and wordlessly begged for more.
Lord, was she wet. So damned wet and soft and hot, that as she gave a little cry and arched into his hand, he instinctively slid his fingers into her.
He felt the change in her just that quickly. Open and willing one second. Closed and tense the next.
"Serena?" He immediately drew his hand away, laid it flat on her stomach. He swore as he moved to shift them back up into a sitting position. "I'm sorry. I should have asked first." He knew it didn't count, but he still had to tell her. "I meant to ask."
She stopped his apologies with a hand over his. "I liked it. Everything we were doing. Everything you did." She shook her head, obviously a little embarrassed by what she was about to say. "I think that was why I just freaked out. Because I liked it too much."
Relief swamped him, just as lust had moments earlier. Still, he knew-- "I moved too fast." Worse, he'd done it right after he'd promised that he'd always be careful with her.
"You didn't."
He brought his mouth nearly to hers. "I did." After one more soft kiss that he wished could undo his mistake, he picked up her bra and T-shirt and handed them to her. "I should take you back to your dorm."
She looked disappointed, but didn't disagree with him. Which was how he knew that he was right about stopping things where they had. After making his own adjustments--and using every single mind-control technique he could think of to will his erection away before they headed back outside--he got up and held out a hand to her.
She took it, but didn't move for a few moments, just looked at him with an expression he couldn't read. "I've never felt like this before. I don't think my heart has ever beat this fast." She moved his hand to her chest so that he could feel her rapid heartbeat. "I never thought I was a very sensual person..."
He knew he needed to let her go, and that he should keep his distance for another week, but he couldn't keep from pulling her into his arms. "If you were any more sensual, I wouldn't have a prayer of surviving you."
Her answering smile was utterly radiant. "Really?"
"Really." He picked up his bag and tugged her out of the locker room. "Now let's get you back to your dorm room so that you can get into bed and finish what I started." Just as he expected, her cheeks flushed. "And just so you know, I'll be thinking of you while I do the same thing."
He was glad when her laughter joined his as they headed out into the darkness.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
"Abi, can I ask you a question?"
Serena's roommate looked up from her book. They'd just finished going over some calculus equations and Serena hoped her explanations were helping Abi a little bit, at least. Her roommate's parents had come down on her pretty hard in the past week over not studying hard enough, which definitely sucked. Although, somehow, Serena couldn't help but think that Genevieve's complete and utter freeze-out--apart from the three-word phone call about the pictures online--was worse. At least Abi's parents cared enough about her to want her to do well. Whereas Genevieve didn't seem to care at all about Serena now that she was no longer doing what she wanted her to do.
"Sure, what's up? Is it about your gorgeous secret boyfriend?" When Serena nodded, Abi shoved her books and laptop aside and focused every ounce of her attention on her. "You're going to sleep with him tonight, aren't you?"
Serena felt her entire face go up in flames. But that was nothing compared to the way her body heated up at the mere suggestion of sleeping with Sean. As if she hadn't thought about it all week long since the football game, and wondered...
"No, I--"
"I don't know how you can stand it," Abi exclaimed before Serena could say anything else. "Sean Morrison is so gorgeous. And he obviously just freaking adores you if the past couple of dates are anything to go by, because I don't know any other reason he would take you to play Frisbee Golf or paint his face and dress up like a total dork for a football game."
Serena was really pleased that her decision to trust her roommate had been a good one. Abi hadn't leaked anything to anyone about Serena and Sean, not even to the other girls in the dorm. And it was so nice to finally have a confidant.
"I just don't get why you're holding out on him like this. Not just by not doing the most doable guy on campus, but by only seeing him once a week. If it was me," Abi said with a wicked smile, "
I'd be living in his bed twenty-four seven. Hey," her roommate added as if she'd just thought of something, "doesn't he have a twin? Wouldn't it be fun if we dated Morrison brothers?"
Serena didn't know what to say. She really liked Abi, and yet she definitely didn't feel equipped to play matchmaker. Not only because everything with Sean was so fresh and new, but also because she hadn't even met his twin yet.
"From everything Sean has told me, Justin sounds great," she said carefully, "but--"
"Or maybe I should go for his rock-star brother, Drew," Abi said with a dreamy look on her face. "He's crazy hot and his music is amazing." Without taking a break to let Serena answer her initial questions about why she wasn't yet sleeping with Sean, Abi said, "Have you met any of them yet?"
"No."
She hadn't expected to, either. She and Sean were still slowly getting to know each other. Okay, she thought as she tried to fight back a flush that Abi was sure to comment on, so maybe the way he'd been kissing and touching her last Friday in the locker room hadn't exactly been slow. Although the way he'd stopped when she'd freaked definitely had been.
Did he have any idea how much more his stopping made her trust him? Especially when she knew he'd wanted to do anything but.
"I'm sure you'll be meeting them soon," Abi said with perfect confidence.
Not for the first time, Serena wished she could be like that, so sure of her place in the world and what she wanted from it. Abi was planning to go into politics and Serena had no doubt she'd get the internship she wanted in Washington, D.C.
"Anyway, remind me why you haven't slept with Sean yet?"
Even though Abi had proved herself to be completely trustworthy so far, Serena was still scared to tell her something so intensely personal. Namely, that she was a nineteen-year-old, world-famous virgin who had only experienced a guy's hand in her pants for the first time last Friday...and that it had fueled every single one of her private fantasies since then.