Read Légende d'Ulenspiegel. English Page 13


  "Just as the Emperor was about to finish his anchovy and drink uphis tankard of beer, the angel's trumpet sounded, and straightwayhe had to betake himself to the air again, grumbling at this suddeninterruption of his repast. High aloft he mounted through space,I following close behind; and as he went he hiccuped with fatigue,and coughed asthmatically, even vomited now and again; for deathhad come upon him at a time when he was suffering from a fit ofindigestion. Thus ceaselessly we soared aloft like arrows shot from abow of cornel-wood. The stars glimmered all around us, and time andagain we saw them detach themselves and fall headlong, tracing longstrokes of fire upon the sky. Once more the angel's trump resounded,very shrill and powerful. Each fanfare seemed to cleave for itself apathway through the cloudy air, scattering the mists asunder like ahurricane that has begun to blow from near at hand. And by this meansour track was marked out clearly for us, till at length, when we hadbeen carried up and up a thousand leagues and more, we beheld ChristHimself in His glory, seated upon a throne of stars. And at His righthand was the angel who records the deeds of men upon a register ofbrass, and at His left hand stood Mary His Mother, she that for everimplores mercy for poor sinners.

  "Claes and the Emperor knelt down together before the throne. Andthe angel took off the crown from the head of the Emperor, and castit away.

  "'There is only one Emperor here,' he said. It is 'Christ!'

  "His Sacred Majesty could not conceal his annoyance; yet managed toassume a humble tone of voice as he begged to be allowed to keep hisanchovy and his tankard of beer, for that he had come a long way andwas very hungry.

  "'Hungry you have been all your life,' said the angel, 'nevertheless,you may go on with your eating and drinking if you want to.'

  "The Emperor emptied the tankard of beer and took a nibble at theanchovy. Then Christ addressed him with these words:

  "'Do you present yourself to judgment with a clean soul?'

  "'I trust so, dear Lord,' answered Charles the Emperor, 'for I haveconfessed my sins and am well shriven.'

  "'And you, Claes? You do not seem to be trembling like the Emperor.'

  "'My Lord Jesus,' answered Claes, 'there is no soul that is clean,and how should I be afraid of you, you that are sovereign good andsovereign justice. Nevertheless, I am afraid of my sins, for theyare many.'

  "'Speak, carrion!' said the angel, addressing himself to the Emperor.

  "'I, Lord,' said Charles, in an embarrassed tone of voice, 'I amhe that was anointed with oil by your priests, and crowned King ofCastile, Emperor of Germany, and King of the Romans. It has ever beenmy first care to maintain that power which was given me by you, andto that end I have done my best by hanging and by sword, by burningand by burying alive, by pit and by fire to keep down all Reformersand Protestants.'

  "But the angel said:

  "'O you false and dyspeptic man, you are trying to deceive us. InGermany, forsooth, you were tolerant enough of the Protestants,seeing that there you had good cause to be afraid of them. But inthe Netherlands you beheaded, burned, hanged, and buried them alive,for there your only fear was lest you might fail to inherit sufficientof their property--so rich and plenteous, like the honey made by busybees. And there perished at your hands one hundred thousand souls,not at all because you loved the Lord Christ, but because you were adespot, a tyrant, a waster of your country, and one that loved himselffirst of all, and after that, nothing but meat, fish, wine, and beer,for you were always as greedy as a dog and as thirsty as a sponge.'

  "When the angel had made an end, Christ commanded that Claes shouldspeak, but now the angel rose from his place, saying: 'This man hasnothing to answer. He was a good, hard-working man, as are all thepoor people of Flanders, willing either for work or play; one thatkept faith with his masters and trusted his masters to keep faithwith him. But he possessed a certain amount of money, and it was forthis reason that an accusation was brought against him, and inasmuchas he had harboured in his house a heretic, he was condemned to beburnt alive.'

  "'Alas!' cried Mary, 'the poor martyr! But here in heaven thereare springs of fresh water, fountains of milk, and exquisite winewhich will refresh you, and I myself will lead you there, goodcharcoal-burner!'

  "And now the angel's trumpet sounded yet again, and I saw a man,naked and very beautiful, rising from the abyss. On his head wasan iron crown, and on the rim of the crown these words inscribed:'Sorrowful till the day of judgment.'

  "He approached the throne and said to Christ:

  "'Thy slave I am until that day when I shall be Thy master!'

  "'O Satan,' said Mary, 'the day will come when there shall be neitherslave nor master any more, and when Christ who is Love, and Satan whois Pride, shall stand forth together as the One Lord both of Powerand of Knowledge.'

  "'Woman,' said Satan, 'thou art all goodness and all beauty.'

  "Then addressing himself to Christ, and pointing at the sametime towards the Emperor, Satan demanded what was to be done withhim. Christ answered:

  "'Take this crowned wormling and put him in a room wherein you havecollected together all instruments of torture which were in use underhis rule. And each time that some innocent wretch is made to suffer thetorture of water, whereby the bodies of men swell up like bladders; orthe torture of the candles, whereby the soles of their feet or theirarmpits are burned and scorched; or the torture of the strappado,whereby their limbs are broken; or the torture of the four wagonsthat drags them asunder--and every time that a free soul breathes outits last upon the funeral pile let this man also endure in his turnthese same deaths and tortures, to the end that he may learn in hisown person what evil may be wrought in the world by an unjust man whohas power over his fellows. Let him languish in prison, let him meetdeath upon the scaffold, let him mourn in exile, far from his nativeland, let him be scorned, abused, and flogged with many whips. Lethim know what it is to be rich and see all his property eaten upby the tax-gatherer, let him be accused by informers and ruined byconfiscations. Turn him into an ass that he may know what it is to begentle by nature and at the same time ill-treated and badly fed; lethim be a poor man that asks for alms and is answered only with abuse;let him be a workman that labours too long and eats too little; andthen, when he has thus well suffered both in his body and his soul,turn him into a dog that he may be beaten, an Indian slave that hemay be sold to the highest bidder, a soldier that he may fight foranother and be killed without knowing why. And then, at the end ofthree hundred years, when he has exhausted all sufferings and allmiseries, make a free man of him, and if in that state of life he isgood like Claes here, you may lay at last his body to rest in somequiet corner of earth that is shady in the noonday heat and open tothe morning sun, and there beneath a beautiful tree and covered withfresh sward, he shall find eternal repose. And his friends shall cometo his grave to moisten it with their tears, and to sow violets there,which are called the flowers of remembrance.'

  "But Mary said: 'Have mercy upon him, O my Son; he knew not what hedid, and we know how power hardens the heart.'

  "'There is no mercy for him,' said Christ.

  "'Alas!' cried His Sacred Majesty, 'woe is me! Would that I had buta single glass of Andalusian wine!'

  "'Come,' said Satan, 'it is past the time for wine or meat or poultry!'

  "And away he carried off the soul of the poor Emperor, down to thenethermost hell, still nibbling as he went his piece of anchovy. Forthis Satan suffered him to do out of pity.

  "Thereafter I saw that Our Lady conducted Claes away and up into thehighest heaven, where is nothing but stars hanging from the roof likeclusters of grapes. And there the angels washed him clean, and hebecame all beautiful and young, and they gave him rystpap to drinkin silver ladles. And then the heavens closed."

  "Claes is in glory," said the widow.

  "His ashes beat against my heart," said Ulenspiegel.

  XLV

  During all the three and twenty days that followed, Katheline grewpaler and paler, and thin and all dried up as though devoured no
tonly by the madness that consumed her but by some interior firethat was even deadlier still. No more did she cry out as of old:"Fire! Fire! Dig a hole! My soul wants to get out!" But she wascontinually transported into a kind of ecstasy, in which she spaketo Nele many strange words.

  "A wife I am," she said, "and a wife you also ought to be. My husbandis a handsome man. A hairy man is he, hot with love. But his knees andhis arms, they are cold!" And Soetkin looked at her sadly, wonderingwhat new kind of madness this might be. But Katheline continued:

  "Three times three are nine, the sacred number. He whose eyes glitterin the night like the eyes of a cat--he only it is that sees themystery."

  One evening when Katheline was talking in this way, Soetkin made agesture of misgiving. But Katheline said:

  "Under Saturn, four and three mean misfortune. But under Venus,it is the marriage number. Cold arms! Cold knees! Heart of fire!"

  Soetkin answered:

  "It is wrong to talk in this way of these wicked pagan idols."

  But Katheline only crossed herself and said:

  "Blessed be the grey horseman. Nele must have a husband--a handsomehusband that carries a sword, a dusky husband with a shining face!"

  "Yes," cried Ulenspiegel, "a very fricassee of a husband, for whomI will make a sauce with my knife!"

  Nele looked at her lover with eyes that were moist with pleasure tosee him so jealous.

  "None of your husbands for me!" she said.

  But Katheline made answer:

  "When cometh he? He that is clad in grey, and booted and spurred?"

  Soetkin bade them say a prayer to God for the poor afflicted one,whereupon Katheline in her madness ordered Ulenspiegel go and fetchfour quarts of dobbel kuyt what time she made ready some heete-koeken,as pancakes are called in Flanders.

  Soetkin asked her why she wished to make festival on a Saturday likethe Jews.

  "Because the butter is ready," said Katheline.

  So Ulenspiegel stood up and took in his hand the big pot of Englishpewter that held just four quarts.

  "Mother," he asked, "what shall I do?"

  "Go," said Katheline.

  Soetkin did not like to say anything more, for she was not mistress ofthe house. So she told her son to go and do as Katheline had biddenhim. Ulenspiegel ran to the tavern and brought back with him thefour quarts of dobbel kuyt. And soon the kitchen reeked with thegood smell of pancakes, and every one felt hungry, even the poorafflicted Katheline.

  Ulenspiegel ate heartily, and drank heartily also, for Kathelinehad given him a full tankard, saying, with a malicious look, that itbehoved him to drink more than the others seeing that he was the onlymale and the head of the house. Afterwards she asked him to give thema song.

  But Ulenspiegel did not sing, and Nele was all tearful, seeing Soetkinso pale, and as it were all sunken into herself. Katheline alone ofthem all appeared to be happy.

  When the meal was over Soetkin and Ulenspiegel went up into the loftto bed. Katheline and Nele stayed behind, for they slept together inthe kitchen.

  All was quiet until the second hour after midnight. Ulenspiegel hadalready been asleep for a long time because of all the beer he hadbeen drinking. But Soetkin, as her custom was, lay on with eyes wideopen, praying Our Lady to send her sleep, but with no avail.

  All of a sudden she heard the cry of a sea-eagle, and from thekitchen came a like cry, in answer. Then, from far off in the countrysomewhere, other cries resounded, always as it seemed in answer tothat cry in the kitchen just below.

  Soetkin tried to think it was only the night-birds calling toone another, and endeavoured to distract her attention from thosesounds. But presently she heard a neighing of horses and a noise as ofiron sabots beating along the high road. Then it was that she openedthe window of the loft and saw that in very fact there were a couple ofhorses saddled just outside the cottage, pawing the ground and nibblingthe grass that grew by the side of the road. Thereafter she heard thevoice of a woman crying out in fear, and a man's voice threatening,followed by the sound of blows, more cries, a door shutting with abang, and then steps running up the ladder in mortal fear:

  All this time Ulenspiegel was snoring away in his bed, hearing nothing,till the door of the loft opened and Nele came in, out of breath,sobbing, and with scarcely anything on. As hastily as she could thegirl dragged against the door a table, some chairs, an old heatingstove, any bit of furniture that was to hand. With these she made arough-and-ready barricade. Meanwhile, outside, the last stars werepaling in the heavens and the cocks beginning to crow.

  Ulenspiegel had turned over in his bed at the noise Nele was making,but now he had gone to sleep again. Nele, meanwhile, had thrownherself on to Soetkin's neck.

  "Soetkin," she said, "I am afraid. Light the candle, do!"

  Soetkin did so, and all the time Nele never left off moaning. By thelight of the candle Soetkin looked the girl up and down. Her shiftwas torn at the shoulder and in front, and there were traces ofblood upon her neck and cheek, such as might be left by the scratchof a finger-nail.

  "Whence have you come? And what are these wounds?" Soetkin asked her.

  Trembling and groaning all the time, the girl made answer:

  "For mercy's sake, Soetkin, do not bring us to the stake!"

  Ulenspiegel meanwhile had awakened from his sleep, and was blinkinghis eyes in the sudden light of the candle. Soetkin said:

  "Who is it down there?"

  "Not so loud!" Nele whispered. "It is the husband Katheline desiredfor me."

  All at once Soetkin and Nele heard Katheline cry out in a loud voice,and their legs gave way beneath them in their terror.

  "He is beating her," said Nele, "he is beating her because of me!"

  "Who is it in the house?" cried Ulenspiegel, jumping out of bed. Andthen, rubbing his eyes, he went stalking up and down the room tillat last he found a heavy poker that stood in the corner. He tookhold of it, but Nele tried to dissuade him, telling him that therewas no one there. But he paid no attention, running to the door andthrowing to one side the chairs and tables and the stove that Nelehad piled up in front of it. All this time Katheline was crying outfrom the kitchen, and Nele and Soetkin held Ulenspiegel--the oneby the waist, the other by the legs--and tried to prevent him fromdescending the stairs. "Don't go down," they told him. "Don't go down,Ulenspiegel. There are devils down there."

  "Forsooth," says he, "Nele's devil-husband! Him verily will I join inmarriage to this long poker of mine! A marriage of iron and flesh! Letme go!"

  But they did not loose their hold, hanging on as they were to thelanding rail.

  And all the time Ulenspiegel was trying to drag them down thestaircase, and they the more frightened as they came nearer to thedevils below. And they could avail naught against him, so that at last,descending now by leaps and bounds like a snowball that falls from thetop of a mountain, he came into the kitchen. And there was Katheline,all exhausted and pale in the light of dawn.

  "Hanske," she was saying, "O Hanske, why must you leave me? Is it myfault if Nele is naughty?"

  Ulenspiegel did not take any notice of her, but straightway openedthe door of the shed, and finding no one there, rushed out into theyard, and thence into the high road. Far away he descried two horsesgalloping off and disappearing in the mist. He ran after them hopingto overtake them, but he could not, for they went like a south windthat scours the dry autumn leaves.

  Ulenspiegel was angry with disappointment, and he came back into thecottage grieving sore in his heart and muttering between his teeth:

  "They have done their worst on her! They have done their worst!..."

  And he looked on Nele with eyes that burned with an evil flame. ButNele, all trembling, stood up before Katheline and the widow.

  "No!" she cried. "No, Tyl, my lover! No!"

  And as she spoke she looked him straight in the face, so sadly and sofrankly that Ulenspiegel saw clearly that what she said was true. Thenhe spake again, and questioned her:

  "B
ut whence came those cries, and whither went those men? Why is yourshift all torn on the shoulder and the back? And why do you bear onforehead and cheek these marks of a man's nails?"

  "I will tell you," she said, "but be careful that you do not haveus burned at the stake for what I shall tell you. You must know thatKatheline--whom God save from Hell--hath had these three-and-twentydays a devil for her lover. He is dressed all in black, he is bootedand spurred. His face gleams with a flame of fire like what one seesin summer-time when it is hot, on the waves of the sea."

  And Katheline whimpered: "Why, oh why, have you left me, Hanske,my pet? Nele is naughty!"

  But Nele went on with her story:

  "The devil announces his approach in a voice that is like the crying ofa sea-eagle. Every Saturday my mother receives him in the kitchen. Andshe says that his kisses are cold and that his body is like snow. Onetime he brought her some florins, but he took from her all the othermoney that she had."

  All this time Soetkin kept on praying for Katheline, with claspedhands. But Katheline spake joyfully: