Erotic Love = I feel only (sexual) desire
I once heard a great priest talk. I do not remember his name. I have no idea how he looked like.
I remember him saying:
“Do not fear sex, it comes as natural as eating and drinking. [...]
I know, there is too much talk about positions and sizes these days, and this can frighten anyone. [...]
Simply, love! (W)holly, love! [...]
Do not reduce your body to a lock searching for a perfect key to match! [...]
Do not follow others and get junk! You deserve better! [...]
Do not ask for my blessings only to procreate! You deserve better! [...]
If your soul is unlocked, no F(lesh) Key will ever be good enough for you! [...]
He said it only once, but I remembered.
He kept repeating other religious staff for days, but I forgot most of them.
Those were the only words I could hear!
Serena's Collection of Aphonic memories (2011-2015)
Serena Maier to Kai Vulcan
Hello!
I am sending you the program for the next week. Your feedback will be most helpful, as I have told you, I have never organized a Jazz Festival before.
I hope you will enjoy your staying in Hermannstadt!
Best wishes,
Serena Maier
Cultural event manager
Kai Vulcan to Serena Maier
Hallo!
Warum wollen Sie nicht Deutsch mit mir zu sprechen? Ich bin kein Fremder zu Ihnen.
See translation
Why do you not want to speak German with me? I am not a foreigner to you.
K.
Serena Maier to Kai Vulcan
Hallo, Kai!
My chief is American and does not speak German or Romanian. She wants to be sure she can read all e-mails from clients. Hope you do not mind writing back in English. Please! Besides, having the same ethnic roots does not mean we speak the same language.
Best regards,
Serena Maier
Cultural event manager
Kai Vulcan to Serena Maier
Shade! Ich mag meine Leute.
See translation
What a pity! I like my people...
Ok. I read the program. May I suggest sending us a list of nice places to eat? You are doing a great job! Thank you!
Hugs!
K.
P.S. I will talk to Kala and Romina, they will not to be late next time we meet. I saw this made you feel quite uncomfortable. Showing them the watch was not polite, they are Indians. There are some cultural differences between us, try to understand that. Think of them as musicians, only that!
You are German. Denke, man kann nicht leugnen, wer du bist.
See translation
Guess you cannot deny who you are.
Serena Maier to Kai Vulcan
This is the list for you. Good point! Thank you!
Serena Maier
Cultural event manager
Kai Vulcan to Serena Maier
It is perfect. I, Kala, Romina, Mackenzie and the French gay went to Cafe Amsterdam last evening. Do you know the place? So quiet! Loved it! Perhaps you can join us tomorrow evening.
Hugs,
K.
Serena Maier to Kai Vulcan
Hallo, Kai,
Thank you for the invitation, my job does not allow me to socialize with clients. Hope you can understand that. Es tut mir leid!
See translation
I am sorry
Hugs,
Serena
Kai Vulcan to Serena Maier
Ich verstehe. Treffen Sie im Büro, dann.
See translation
I see. Meet you at the office, then.
K.
Kai Vulcan to Serena Maier
Hallo!
I talked to our hotel manager but I could not fix the problem. She wants us to pay for everything. A police officer comes tomorrow at 12.30. Could you please help us? We need to talk alone, there is a problem of Ehekrach, how do you call it in English...get violent in a couple? Kala and Romina, again, I am afraid! Please come, there's a cafe near the hotel.
Muss ich Ihren Manager für persmission fragen? Dein Vater?
See translation
Shall I ask your manager for permission? Your father?
Thank you for everything,
K.
***
Kai Vulcan to A. D. at ArtEventin
We would like to express our gratitude to our cultural manager, Serena Maier, for solving the conflict with our hotel manager. Her solution was the right one for all those involved. We appreciate her ability to organize the festival, also
Respectfully,
Kai Vulcan, Romina Parsh, Kala Parsh, Jan Mkenzie, Michelle Glemton
(connected to Messanger)
Kai: Hi! I wrote you an official thanking e-mail. Hope your chief reads that too and gives you a bonus or something. You deserve it! Your solution made everyone happy. Thanks!
Serena: Yeeeei! Happy you think this way.:-) I like playing Harvey from “Suits”! No promotion soon. A.D. is furious I was on your side. Now, she tries to make me quit Jazz.
Kai: What?
Serena: Ja, she thinks I'm getting too emotionally involved in this. Well, I'm not the giving you up. It's fine! She gets moody, she'll forget all about it in a week.
Kai: Super!
Serena: There is only one problem left. The office will no longer help me organize the trip. This weekend!
Kai: Do we really need this?
Serena: Yes, we do. There are nice things to see outside the city. I must organize everything alone in two days.
Kai: Ok. If you think so. Are you sure? No one will complain, I'll talk to the rest. How can I help you? I've organized trips in Germany.
Serena: Thanks. I need to see you later. Let's try that Cafe Amsterdam, this time. See you on the Bridge of Lies, near the Evangelical Church, at 6.00! Hope you remember where it is.
***
Kai: Hallo! Everything goes as planned. We've bought water and food. We don't have high expectation, just go outside the city, visit something, and have a good time. Kala will bring the guitar and we'll improvise, laugh a lot. Ok?
Serena: The idea is fantastic, but I've already convinced the driver, you know, with some money talk. We'll do that some other time.
Serena: Es tut mir leid. Ich hoffe, Sie haben nicht verärgern.
See translation
I am sorry. I hope you are not upset.
Serena: I want to show you the real Dracula castle, not the one they sell for tourists. You'll love it! It is an amazing citadel in Poenari, all in ruins, high in the mountains, wilderness all around! Hope you are in shape and ready for a long walk, we have to climb 1480 steps to get there! The view is breathtaking!
Kai: Ich bin sicher, es ist. Aber so viele Schritte!
see translation
I am sure it is. But there are so many steps!
I'm not fit for climbing. I'm sure I can't keep up with the rest and you'll have to leave me behind, eventually. I think I'll wait for you at the bus.
Serena: I am sorry to hear this. I'll just drop the whole thing, then. Call the driver and tell him the plan's changed.
Kai: No! It won't be fair to the rest! Go, have fun! I'll be fine! I won't get lost... I promise.:-) I'll stay near the bus and wait for you.
Kai: Besides, I've told you, Kala brings the guitar. I'll practice. I'm writing a song right now and it sounds fine so far. I've called it “A coffee bar we call our home”. Hope I'll play it for you one day, in Germany. It is about me, finding redemption. It won't be a hit, but it speaks a lot to me.
***
Kai Vulcan to Serena Maier
Alle meine besten Wünsche: Freude, Gesundheit und Erfolg in Ihrer Karriere. Da die Zeit schnell in diesem Leben fliegt, wünsche ich Ihnen es mit vielen Momenten der wahre Glück und die wahre Liebe für sich selbst zu verlangsamen.
Frohe Oster
n, Serena!
See translation
All my best wishes: joy, health and success in your career. Since time flies quickly in this life, I wish you slowed it down for yourself with many moments of real happiness and true love.
Happy Easter, Serena!
Kai Vulcan,
Jazz piano player and composer
Serena's status: Once upon a time in Berlin, the Jazzist played Me
Humble skies of blue eyes shut,
pouring down like rain
falling in drops,
from my chin to my groins.
My thoughts are melting on my skin
like some deep wrinkles,
too many beers or too many coffees around
and I have still not lost my thirst...
I am still at the same table, waiting for you.
What a pity we shall never meet again,
Into this dingy coffee bar we call our home
To chat about my hopeless soul,
and drench my face with heaven, like Danae
Danae by Gustav Klimt, 1907
(oil on canvas, 77x83 cm)
- excerpt from “Love Mythology”, art exhibition booklet
Gustav Klimt (1862-1918) is one of the greatest Austrian symbolist painters, famous for his highly decorative erotic art. His eclectic and golden adorned style is also prominent in his painting of “Danae” (1907), an unconventional portrait, using his favorite technique, oil on canvas.
The work depicts the story of the Greek mythological princess imprisoned into a metal chamber by her father. According to the legend, Zeus, the supreme god, manages to pass by the bronze wall and visit her in the form golden raindrops that fall over her womb, conceiving a child.
This divine, transcended love is mixed with eroticism, as the painting combines a realistic depiction of an aroused woman's face with symbolic elements, the most prominent of which is the veil, uncovering her body, in a spiral form. This is not an isolated case, as Klimt's paintings have been critically acclaimed for their geometry used for hidden purposes. The sexual intercourse is not obvious to the eye, with the rectangular shape of the golden rain evoking masculinity, barely inserted into, not fully penetrating the circular form of the body which evokes the feminine.
However, the viewer may feel entranced by Danae's submissive attitude, antithetical to the dynamic flow of the divine male figure, depicted only as a golden fertilizing shower. Much like woman from the “Kiss”, the masterpiece of the painter's “Golden period”, she has her eyes closed, as she is self absorbed in this fetal circle position, isolated from the rest of the world. She is imprisoned by a piece of cloth in the color of royal purple, indicator of her aristocratic lineage, the only realistic element linking her to the myth.
Although Danae may be considered the Greek virgin mother-to-be, she assumes her sexuality as a form of challenging social and parental endorsement, as for the artist, tingling viewer perception of moral consequences of sexual behavior is the main part of his seductive power.
Serena's status: this spring, Mikael Liebfried exposed himself,
sharing the album “Delicate Predator” on my Timeline
Baffled,
I look at Love, my “delicate predator”,
plundering my city again,
Voluptuously playing the bells of my funeral,
with caustic dissonance, haft steps, not the tones
I got accustomed too.
Your rhythm has changed my poetry completely.
I saw your cheating looks petting all over...
I caught your kissing with lust my neck down,
And breathe your soft hair piercing each others.
Ah! A pride's chip! So much weight! Worry preys on my soul,
or should I have written: “cheap”, “so much wait!”, “worry”, “pray!”, “Oh! My sole!”?
Wow! I can make so many spelling mistakes, if I want to,
but you knew that already, didn't you, “love”?
How many stupid errors have you counted so far?
Your visual depiction of Love is correct no doubt,
Since there are so many incredible flowers/flours to shoot/snort
on the market, these days!
Oh! No more white roses for me, now, I see...
Orchids you've sent me... aha! at least, do you know what they mean?
The Greeks called these flowers “orchids”, “testicles”, that is...
They symbolizes virility, das Glied, alle Glieder von sich strecken
Don't pretend you don't understand my German...
How many years have you studied it in school? More than five?
So, you lost the heritage completely, but not your tongue,
Really! You can still taste my words and lick...Oh! Yeah!
And I can go on and on with this intellectual high talk,
making you feel damn embarrassed.
To be honest, I've deleted all your pictures
Tarquinus, you signed them, but I don't even remember your name.
It was Lieb...something.
Never mind!
Rape of Lucretia by Rubens,
(oil on canvas)
(draft)
“Love Mythology”, art exhibition booklet
Rubens painting “The Rape of Lucretia” (1612) presents an intimate and violent scene. Lucretia was married to Collantinus, a Roman army commander, the nephew of the King of Rome. During a military expedition, Collantinus proved his wife's virtue among his comrades, as he unexpectedly returned home with them, finding Lucretia in her chambers. One of the men in that group was Tarquinius, the son of the Roman king, who became fascinating with Lucretia's moral superiority. While her husband was away, Tarquinus came back and forced himself upon her, threatening to kill her and a slave and tell her husband that he caught them in the act of adultery.
In this scene, Rubens manages to suggest the dramatic conflict between lust and virtue. The dark shadows behind Tarquinus' body hide the malicious face of the mythological Fury. She encourages the rapist, as he aggressively puts his hands between his victim legs.
Hopeless, Lucretia tries to protect herself against this forced sexual attack, her hands and knees are in a defensive close position. Unfortunately, she has no escape, she is the victim of an ego competition among men, since her husband's pride made Tarquinus feel envious. Above her, a small Cupid is holding a torch, lighting the whole scene.
Critics believe that by placing Tarquinus in the middle, the painter suggests he is being trapped between sexual surrender (Cupid) and sexual violence (Fury). However, this interpretation is not accurate.
On the one hand, mythological Furies are famous for following perpetuators and victims in order to punish and torment them, and Tarquinus and Lucretia will eventually lose their life after this aggression.
On the other hand, Cupid is the one responsible for the encounter, as he made Tarquinus lust for her.
Therefore, in my view, the would-be rapist finds himself trapped in a “moment” in time, facing the cause (Cupid), but ignoring the effect (Fury) of his action.
Serena's status: Hermannstadt - New York,
4634 miles, 7 hours difference - for the rest
inside my mind, this moment - only me
Pathétique!
Au début j’étais comme un parfum,
Le baiser du dragon, Samsara,
Or any other scent flaming your body
Aroused, in public display.
.................................................
Common smell of pagan fantasy,
benzoin, patchouli, gardenia,
Mix the sweat of your immoral lips,
Sniffing the air around,
my clothes, my skin, my doubts, grumbling in my belly...
such an irony, too many words already, no more feelings.
.....................................................
Now, like a pillar I hold up this love
Above the feto
r of my canny breath,
Above the tang and trails of my wanderings,
As I have been in fumes since you have left.
Cupid and Psyche by Giuseppe Maria Crespi, 1709
(oil on canvas, 130x215 cm)
(draft)
“Love Mythology”, art exhibition booklet
“Cupid and Psyche” is a Baroque mythological painting, created by Giuseppe Maria Crespi in 1709. It illustrates the mythical tale concerning the revelation of Love's true nature, combining the traditional realistic style of representing human naked bodies with an extraordinary technical mastery of spacial illusion.
Cupid, the god of Love, marries Psyche, a very beautiful maiden, making only one request at their wedding that she should never look at his real face. As times goes by, Psyche falls in love with her invisible husband, but their happiness is ruined as she grows afraid her she might have married a monster.
Crespi's painting depicts this dramatic moment when, Psyche, in search of certainty, enlightens the face of her sleeping lover with an oil lamp in her hand, but her light only wakes him up in fear.
For the viewer, the lamp is the key element that makes the scene visible, as it reveals with different intensity the major elements of the setting: an orange curtain, (symbol of mystery being disclosed) and the couple (reduced to the essential parts of their naked bodies: the breast of Psyche, the leg, hip, wings and hands of Cupid). The two faces are only half-lit, as if the mystery should not be totally uncovered. However, it is obvious that the startled Cupid, desperately trying to protect his identity does not have the physiognomy of a beast. Actually, it is the fear of his moral ugliness (hidden in invisibility) that makes Psyche take action, because she cannot fully understand or obey him.
Since “psyche” is the Greek name for the human soul, the whole scene is a metaphor. Our innate emotional needs (for security and control) are questioning our blind trust and sexual attraction to another human being, the same way as Psyche is questioning the identity of her Cupid.
Like in the case of Psyche, self preservation can definitely ensure the survival of our muscular organ, the one that that pumps the blood in our body. However, only sacrificing self preservation to love commitment can determine the survival of our heart, the center of all our human emotions.
Charmer
Pragmatic Love = I have an interest
I often talk to people I meet about values, things they believe in. Usually, they say: “honesty, generosity, love.”
However, some of them cheat easily (usually, when being left alone, in another city) and turn out to be quite greedy (doing something only for a specific amount of money). I find their values to be so damn superficial.