Read Legend of the Salad Traveler Page 5

Chapter 5 – The Game

  Carl’s friend was frustrated that they were lost again, but with all the unique and interesting events he had already experienced, he quickly pushed his exasperation aside. After finally negotiating to their intended destination, Carl’s friend was overwhelmed coming upon the stadium erected in the same form and style of the Roman Coliseum. Cheers and roars bellowed from the edifice. As throngs of persons entered into the stadium, just as many were waiting to enter through the various gates.

  “Is the game ending or starting?” Carl’s friend asked wondering at the duplicity of spectator activity.

  “Both, there’s usually multiple games going on,” his guide answered reaching up toward Carl’s friend’s head who responded jerking back out of the way of the approaching hand.

  “What’re you doing?” Carl’s friend responded peeved off.

  “How else you think we’re gonna pay for our tickets?”

  “I’m getting a little tired of you grabbing clumps of my hair. You’ll have to find some other way to get us in there, but you’re surely not using any more of my hair.”

  “Then how are we supposed to get in?”

  “I don’t care how we get in. Plus I really didn’t want to come to the game anyway?”

  Carl’s friend’s guide sighed in exacerbation staring intently at Carl’s friend who returned a stern gaze.

  “Fine, let’s go get something to eat. I’m hungry anyway.”

  —— ♦ ——

  Carl’s friend was upset they were in what could be considered a sports bar, although he had to admit the aromas from the various foods smelled quite good. The numerous video and holographic displays encircling the eatery almost overwhelmed him, especially watching many forms of games he had no idea how they were played, how teams were identified, and in most cases, how the scoring worked. What he didn’t realize was that many of the games televised were actually extended battles between warring planets, dimensional adversaries or family feuds. The most prominent, being played on one of the larger screens and garnering the most watchers, was between two sister worlds engaged in a terse and pensive conflict.

  So how did this conflict arise? When the prime minister from one of the worlds visited the sister world, the housekeeping staff forgot to use fabric softener. As a result, the prime minister had a very uncomfortable night’s sleep and felt groggy the next day. Well, during an informal tea party, the prime minister kept yawning during his host’s wife describing her new hairstyle. She mistook his yawning as being bored or worse yet, not liking her hairstyle. She immediately turned to her husband admonishing him for lying to her and saying that he actually liked it. Well, her husband thought the prime minister made a serious gaffe on the “Bro Code” by not complimenting her hair even if he didn’t like. But it wasn’t the gaffe the planets fought the war about, or in this case, played the game until the utter exhaustion of one of the teams. The prime minister correcting himself stated he actually did like the hairstyle at the same time when he could get a word in. Her husband came out and said he actually did hate the hairstyle. She immediately kissed her husband and thanked him for his honesty while now she was upset at the prime minister for lying to her about actually liking her hair. He really didn’t care one way or another, he was just thinking through the entirety of this and how much all he really wanted was a Parson’s Parsimsimple Spiked punch and to take a nap on sheets cleaned with fabric softener.

  The food came out promptly satisfying both men’s appetites.

  “So are you gonna try and explain this game to me?” Carl’s friend asked. Observing the competition while eating, the nearest he could associate what the two teams were playing was a mixture of football, soccer and paintball. Each team fielded 25 to 30 players, one having to retire to the side if getting hit with what appeared to be a paintball containing a fluorescent substance.

  “Nothing much to explain, two teams get on the field of battle and duke it out.”

  “Field of battle?” The comment really confused Carl’s friend as his guide’s attempt to explain the history of the game, the objective of the game, and other key rules didn’t help. The duration of the game being until one side was completely eliminated was easily understood, but the rules for a player being eliminated and then being able to come back in after a set amount of time convoluted the explanation. The current game was said to have gone on for nearly one hundred of earth standard years.

  “So what happens when one side finally does lose?”

  “With this battle, the losing society has all its fabric softener taken away.”

  Carl’s friend returned the response with a countenance of incredulity. “Really, fabric softener?”

  “Hey, you’d be surprised the trouble fabric softener can cause.”

  Carl’s friend decided to hail for another drink and focused on another screen. “So what’s that one about?” he asked, pointing to a smaller holographic display with a much smaller number of players on the field, a combination of what appeared to be both male and female members of the species.

  “Tragic story with that one, it’s the story of two star-crossed lovers...”

  “And let me guess, the parents were bitter rivals, the two lovers met secretly and eventually got married then…” Carl’s friend stopped talking, noticing the baffled look on his guide’s face. “What? That’s not the story? I always thought that was a universal story.”

  “Yeah, your universe,” Carl’s friend’s guide quipped. “Actually the in-laws turned out to be great friends. It was when the husband one day accidently burned the food on a grill during a barbecue that the families got upset with one another and decided to settle it on the field, more so in jest, actually.”

  “It seems they fight about trivial things out here.”

  “Hey, things aren’t as serious or intense as your blue orb. You tend to fight over some serious stuff. Why’d you think your home is so interesting to all of us?”

  Carl’s friend decided not to continue on with the conversation. “Look, can we just go and try to find my salad?”

  Carl’s friend’s guide looked down at his watch and then at his companion with mild anger, because he was really enjoying the game. “Fine, we can go. The ministry should be open by now. We couldn’t have done anything since I just realized they were actually closed for the holidays anyways.”