LONG
AFTER
MIDNIGHT
* * *
IRIS JOHANSEN
BANTAM BOOKS
New York London Toronto Sydney Auckland
Contents
Title Page
Quote
Acknowledgments
Prologue
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
About the Author
Bantam Books by Iris Johansen
Praise for the bestselling novels of Iris Johansen
Preview of Fatal Tide
Copyright Page
Now hast thou but one bare hour to live
And then thou must be damned perpetually
Stand still, you ever moving spheres of heaven
That time may cease and midnight never come
—CHRISTOPHER MARLOWE
The Tragical History of Dr. Faustus
Acknowledgments
My sincere thanks to Asst. Professor Dale L. Vogelien, Ph.D., for her help in overseeing my journey through the maze of genetic science.
* * *
PROLOGUE
* * *
I can’t do it.” Kate’s hand tightened on her father’s with desperation. “I don’t want to even talk about it. Do you understand? Don’t ask me, dammit.”
“I have to ask you.” Robert Murdock tried to smile. “There’s no one else, Kate.”
“There could be a cure. New cures are developed every day.”
“But not in my foreseeable future.” Wearily he leaned back against the pillows of the hospital bed. “Be merciful. Do it, Kate.”
“I can’t.” Tears were streaming down her face. “This isn’t why I became a doctor. You don’t mean it. If you were yourself, you wouldn’t ask me.”
“Look at me.” She met her father’s eyes. “I’ve never been more myself. Do I mean it, baby?”
He meant it. She searched frantically for a way to sway him. “What about Joshua? He loves you.”
He flinched. “He’s only six years old. He’ll forget.”
“You know better than that. Joshua isn’t like other kids.”
“No, he’s like you.” His tone was loving. “Bright and loyal and ready to fight the world. But he’s too young to be forced to carry around any kind of baggage. If you don’t want to do this for me, do it for my grandson, do it for Joshua’s sake.”
He had thought it all out, she realized in despair. “I don’t want to let you go,” she whispered.
“You won’t be letting me go.” He paused. “I’ve been lying here thinking about the time when you were a very little girl and we’d walk through Jenkins’s woods. You used to be sad when autumn came and the leaves fell. Do you remember what I told you?”
“No.”
He shook his head reprovingly. “Kate.”
“You said that each leaf was a link that could never really be broken or die,” she said haltingly. “It would curl and fall but it would return to the earth and the chain would go on brighter and stronger than ever.”
“A bit profound but absolutely true.”
“Bullshit.”
His face lit with laughter and for a moment he was once more that younger, stronger man in Jenkins’s woods. “You believed it then.”
“It’s easier to accept fate when you’re seven years old. I’m different now.”
“Yes, you are.” He reached out and gently touched her damp cheek with an index finger. “Twenty-six and one tough cookie.”
She didn’t feel tough. She felt as if she were breaking apart inside. “You bet I am,” she said shakily. “These days I’d get a ladder and nail those leaves back on their branches or find a way of keeping them from falling in the first place.”
His smile faded. “Maybe someday. Not now, Kate. Don’t try to nail me back to my branch. I’ve no taste for crucifixion.”
Pain stabbed through her. “You know I wouldn’t—I love you.”
“Then let me go. Help me. Let me keep my dignity.”
“I don’t know—I can’t even think of—Please, don’t make me.” Her head sank to rest on their joined hands on the bed. “Let me fight for you.”
“You will fight for me.”
“No, you want me to give you up. I can’t do that.”
She felt his hand lovingly stroke her hair. “You can do it. Because you’re one tough lady . . . and you wouldn’t want to be crucified either. We’ve always understood each other, haven’t we?”
“Not in this.”
“Even in this.”
He was right. She did understand. If she had allowed herself to think about it, she would have realized he would come to this decision. “To hell with understanding. I care about you.”
“And that’s why I know you’ll do it. I’ve tried to live my life with dignity. Don’t let it end like this.”
“You’re not being fair.”
“No, I’m not. Will you let me be selfish? Just this once?”
She could barely hear his words through the sobs that were shaking her body.
“Thank you, baby.” His hand continued to gently stroke her hair as he said softly, “But you’ll have to be very careful. I don’t want you hurt. No one must ever know.”
* * *
ONE
* * *
Dandridge, Oklahoma
Three years later
Saturday, March 24
You’re not concentrating.” Joshua lowered his bat and frowned at her reprovingly. “Get a grip, Mom. How will I learn if you make it this easy for me?”
“Sorry.” Kate grinned at him and sprinted to retrieve the baseball that had bounced off the high wood fence. “I forgot I was dealing with the next Fred McGriff. I’ll try to do better.” She wound up, lifted her leg, and released the ball.
Joshua connected with the ball and it soared over the fence. He grinned at her. “Home run.”
“But that was a good pitch,” she said indignantly.
“Great pitch, but you signaled a fastball.”
She wiped her palms on her jeans and looked at him in disgust. “How?”
“You always lift your leg higher when it’s a fastball. You ought to watch it.”
“I will next time.” She made a face. “You could have gone easy on me. I have to work this afternoon. I don’t have time to search the neighborhood for that blasted ball.”
“I’ll help you.” He dropped the bat and came toward her. “If you give me another fifteen minutes’ practice.”
“Get one of your friends to pitch to you. Rory’s the team’s pitcher. He must be pretty good.”
“He’s okay.” He fell into step with her. “But you throw a better slider.”
She opened the gate and preceded him to the front of the house. “You’re darn right.”
“And you learn quick. You don’t make the same mistake twice.”
“Thank you.” She inclined her head gravely. “I appreciate the kind words.”
His freckled face lit with a sly smile. “I’m buttering you up.”
“I suspected as much.” She made a half motion toward him and then caught herself. Joshua was an affectionate child but he was a very dignified nine. It was Saturday afternoon and the suburb was brimming with neighborhood kids. It wouldn’t do to
have one of them see her son submit to a hug. “We’ve been practicing two hours. I don’t have any more time.”
He shrugged philosophically. “I thought I’d give it a shot.”
“Like you gave my fastball.”
“Yep.” He glanced away from her. “You brought home work from GeneChem again?”
“Uh-huh.” She glanced around the postage-stamp front yard. “Where is that ball? Do you see it?”
He didn’t seem to hear her. “Rory says his dad said the people who work at GeneChem are building Frankensteins.”
She stiffened and turned to look at him. “And what did you tell him?”
“I told him that he was stupid. That you’re trying to save lives, and monsters are only in books and movies.” He looked away from her. “Does it make you mad that people lie about you?”
“Does it make you mad?”
“Yes.” His hands clenched at his sides. “I want to punch them in the nose.”
She smothered a smile. This was serious stuff. It was the first time Joshua had faced the controversy surrounding her work, and she must handle it as diplomatically as possible. Unfortunately, diplomacy wasn’t her forte. “It’s better to try to explain and make them understand. It’s not really their fault. What we’re doing in genetics is fairly new, and a lot of people don’t understand that by studying and attempting to alter gene structure, we’re only trying to fight diseases and make life better.”
“Then they’re stupid. You wouldn’t hurt anyone.”
“I guess they think I may not do the right thing, that I won’t be careful enough.”
Joshua made a rude noise.
She wasn’t reaching him. She had an inspiration. Joshua was a computer fanatic, like all the kids these days. “I’ll buy you a computer program that explains DNA and what medicine is trying to do. Maybe you could show Rory.”
He instantly brightened. “But what if he still doesn’t get it?”
Then you punch him in the nose, she wanted to tell him.
Diplomacy. She wouldn’t have Joshua suffer for her impatience and frustration. “Then you come to me and we’ll map out a new plan.”
“Okay.” He studied her, and his face suddenly lit with mischief. “And don’t worry, I won’t tell you when I punch him in the nose.”
Shrewd little rascal. He was entirely too perceptive for his age. Perceptive and bright and totally lovable. She felt herself melting as she looked at him. Small, sturdy, with sandy brown hair and an untamable cowlick, he was nearly irresistible. She quickly turned away and started back to the house. “Just for that, you can find the blasted ball yourself.”
“That’s not fair. You’re the defense. If you didn’t catch it, you should be—”
“Telephone.” Phyliss Denby stood on the front porch. “Long distance. Noah Smith again.”
Kate frowned. “You told him I was home?”
Phyliss nodded. “I got tired of making excuses.”
“Will you help me find my ball, Grandma?” Joshua asked.
Phyliss smiled at him as she came down the steps. “You bet.”
Kate gave Joshua a mock scowl behind Phyliss’s back. They both knew his grandmother would jump over the moon if Joshua asked her. He smiled innocently back at Kate and turned to Phyliss. “I hit a home run. Fastball.”
“She kicked her leg too high again?”
“Yep.”
“You knew I was doing it too?” Kate asked indignantly. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Why should I tell you? I’m no pitching coach,” Phyliss said. “Go answer the phone.”
Kate moved reluctantly across the porch and into the house. She didn’t want to talk to Noah Smith again. She usually had no problem asserting herself, but the man’s confidence and persistence were overwhelming and annoying. At first she had been flattered that Smith wanted to hire her. J. and S. Pharmaceuticals was a small but prestigious company, Smith himself a famous research scientist, and the money he had offered more than generous. But the man couldn’t seem to take no for an answer. It was as if he didn’t hear anything he didn’t want to hear.
“Sorry to bother you on a Saturday.” Noah Smith’s deep voice was layered with silken sarcasm when she answered the phone. “It was necessary. I never seem to catch you at home . . . or the office. Strange.”
“Not so strange. And just how did you get my home phone number, Dr. Smith?”
“Noah. I told you to call me Noah.”
“How did you get my home number, Noah? It’s unlisted.”
“But nothing’s really private any longer, is it? Who answered the phone? I’ve talked to her before.”
“My mother-in-law. It’s very flattering that you would go to the trouble of calling me at home, but I prefer to keep my home and work separate.”
“Your mother-in-law? I understood you were divorced.”
“I am but she still cares for my son. Phyliss is—” She stopped. “How did you know I was divorced?”
“I’d hardly try to hire you without knowing all I could about you.”
That made sense. “Then you must know I’m providing a very stable life for myself and my son and wouldn’t consider uprooting my family to take a new position.”
“Oklahoma doesn’t have the monopoly on stability. Seattle has a lot to offer. We need to work together. Do you want more money?”
“No.” She was suddenly tired of his bulldozer tactics. She said with precision, “I don’t want more money. I don’t want to move. In fact, I don’t want to work with you, Dr. Smith. Is that clear?”
“Perfectly. I’ll up the offer another ten thousand a year. Think about it. I’ll get back to you.”
He hung up the phone.
She gritted her teeth in frustration as she returned the receiver to the hook. Impossible. The man was impossible.
“You know it might not be a bad idea if you took the job,” Phyliss said from the doorway. “You need a little shaking up.”
“I’m happy where I am.” She made a face. “And you’d yell bloody murder if I took Joshua across the country.”
“Not if you took me with you.”
Kate’s eyes widened. “You’d leave Michael?”
Phyliss smiled. “I love my son but I’m not blind to his faults. He has a habit of pigeonholing people and then getting upset when they won’t stay in their niche. He saw you as his wife, mother of his child, keeper of his home. You divorced him because you’re more than that and you had to break out of the pigeonhole. He sees me as just good old Mom, his father’s widow, Joshua’s grandmother. I’m more than that too.”
Kate looked at her affectionately. Slim, tall, with short curly brown hair, Phyliss appeared younger and possessed far more vitality than many of the women Kate worked with every day. “Yes, you are.” She had been astonished and pleased when Phyliss Denby had moved in with her after the divorce two years ago. She had thought there was every chance her friendship with Phyliss would go down the drain with the marriage. Instead, her mother-in-law had taken over running the house and caring for Joshua when Kate was at work. Independent, brusque, and energetic, she had been a blessing for both Kate and Joshua. “But you wouldn’t want to move. You’ve lived here all your life.”
“Maybe it’s time I was shaken up a little too.” She came forward. “If this is a good job, don’t let it go by.”
“It’s not that good. Noah Smith is . . . eccentric. We probably wouldn’t be able to work together.”
“Eccentric?”
“Genetic research is a slow, methodical process of trial and elimination. He goes off on tangents.”
“And the result?”
She shrugged. “He’s brilliant. Naturally, he’s had his successes.”
“Then maybe tangents are the way to go.”
“Not my way.” She turned and moved toward the door. “And there’s no use talking about it. Even if I thought I could work with him, I can’t leave here.”
“Can’t?” Phyliss looked a
t her curiously. “One of the things I’ve always admired about you is the fact that you didn’t seem to know the meaning of that word.”
“All right. Won’t.” Kate smiled at her over her shoulder. “Did you find Joshua’s ball?”
“I take it the subject’s closed,” Phyliss murmured. “The ball was under the rosebush. Joshua says you have to work this afternoon. Should I take him out to the movies?”
“If you like. It doesn’t matter. Once I start work, I don’t hear him anyway.”
“I must have lost it for a minute. When you’re working, you wouldn’t hear a volcano erupting.”
Because every minute brought her nearer to the answer, and the anticipation was becoming unbearable. The last experiments had been wonderfully promising. She said lightly, “There aren’t any volcanoes in Oklahoma.”
“But there are volcanoes near Seattle. It could be exciting for you.”
Kate glanced around the small, cozy living room, at the comfortable sofa and chairs with faded upholstery, the old oak coffee table where Joshua could safely prop his feet when he was watching TV. She and Phyliss had carefully made this house a home. Even if she could have left, she would not have chosen to go. She needed the stability and roots she had here.
“I can do without excitement,” she said firmly. “I’m staying here.”
“She turned you down again?” Anthony Lynski asked as Noah turned away from the phone. “Stubborn lady. Are you sure you need her?”
“I need her.” Noah sat down at his desk. “I want the delivery system and she’s got it. Or she’ll have it soon.”
“I read that last article she wrote for the medical journal too, and it seemed pretty speculative to me.”
“Did you expect her to detail the process before it was patented?”
“Then why did she write the article at all?”
“Sheer excitement. I could almost taste it while I was reading the article. I felt the same way when I had the first breakthrough on RU2 three years ago. She wanted to share, to talk about it, but it wasn’t safe to confide in anyone.”