Read Looking for Love Page 4


  Chapter Three

  Ella stood inside the glass windows of her conservatory-turned-office. If it weren’t for Carol’s insistence, she would have set up her home office in the dining room. She hated using her favourite room that seeped in the light from outside for business. Not many people in South Africa had a conservatory in their home. She liked to savour it for her me-time.

  Yet, Carol had spoken the truth. And this was more than a business. It was her dream.

  Somehow, her great-uncle had known the dream she’d buried deep inside her for years—to help people find love. Could her gran have told him? At school, she’d often been accused of matchmaking her friends, especially the Famous Four, but most of the matches had gone wrong so she’d stopped her prying in other people’s lives.

  She opened to the front page of The Album on her desk and stared at it. When would her first customer arrive? They’d placed an ad in their local newspaper and also on Facebook and online groups thanks to Pauline’s design expertise and Andrea’s emails to the relevant parties.

  It had cost a chunk of her savings, but her friends had promised to pay her back any day now. She’d already received Carol’s payment into her bank account. Carol, the ever-perfect finance lady. Ella didn’t know why she always complained about her job and career—Carol was an expert with figures.

  Oh, well. The weekend would probably pass like any other at this rate.

  A knock sounded on her front door. Her heart pounded, her mouth went dry, and her head spun a moment. She grabbed onto the filing cabinet to steady herself and take a deep breath.

  Within a few seconds, she’d stepped to the door and opened it. She blinked.

  “Ross. What you doing here now?”

  He frowned. “Well, nice to see you, too.”

  “It’s…well, I suppose it is a Saturday.” For a moment, she considered if he should be at work. Of course, she worked today, but he didn’t know that.

  “Come in.” Should she tell him about her new business?

  “I saw your advert.” He gunned her with a curious, questioning—could she say—interrogating gaze.

  “You did?”

  What would he think? She really wanted his approval on this.

  “What are you up to?”

  “We set up a part-time home business—after hours. To help people.”

  “Since when are you qualified to match couples?”

  His bumpy chin hardened flat. Why was he so upset?

  Tears pricked her eyes. Somehow, Ross’s criticism hurt more than she expected. “I’ve always wanted to…you know I like to help people find their special someone.”

  “Yes, I know you want your friends to find the right partners, but really, El, you’re jumping into things.”

  “No.” She sucked in a breath. “I thought hard about this.”

  “Long and hard?”

  She pasted a cheeky smile on her face to hide the quivers because of Ross’s doubts. “Hard, not very long—maybe a few hours.”

  How long had it taken since she’d read the letter and signed the back of The Album? Less than an hour. Maybe about half an hour. And the outcome for Pauline had only confirmed it for her and her friends. When she knew something was right, why wait? That’s what would happen when she met the right guy. She’d always felt she would just know. All the doubts, confusion, and pain would disappear when she met her ideal man.

  He flopped down on her couch and sighed. “I don’t know.”

  He reached for her hand and pulled her down next to him. “I don’t want you to burn yourself out. You work hard all week, and now every weekend, you’ll be working at home, too.”

  She loved that he cared, but this meant more to her than he seemed to gauge. “Only on Saturdays. And maybe week nights if it starts taking off. My friends are helping me—it’s a joint business. They’re doing all the admin and promo stuff. I’ll just work directly with the customers.”

  “Had any customers yet?”

  “Nope.” She sighed. “Want to be the first?”

  He gasped. “What?”

  “Just kidding. Want coffee instead?”

  “Sure, thanks.” He rested his head back on the soft, upper edge of her couch. “Been a long week.”

  Oh, so that explained his mood earlier. “Work still giving you a hard time?”

  “That, and the house is falling apart.”

  “What do you mean?” She stood over him, scrutinising the new lines forming on his forehead and around his eyes. She’d known Ross since they were in high school and to see him starting to age ten years later pinched at her heart a bit. For some reason, she’d thought he’d be young and carefree forever.

  “I bought a scrap heap.”

  “You chose it.”

  “I know. But once I bought it, I found all these hidden problems—cracks in the foundations, drainage problems in the garden, ant infestation in the roof, window latches broken, frames rusted.”

  That’s the first time she’d heard about all his house problems.

  He rubbed his forehead and she wanted to give him a head massage all of a sudden to ease the tension. He just looked so vulnerable and tired. Like someone very dear to her, she couldn’t bear to see that look on his face—helpless and despondent. It burst her mood bubble.

  “Really? You never told me.”

  “I’ve kind of been in denial.”

  “But you’ve been there two years already.”

  Why didn’t he tell her things? She told him everything. Okay, she hadn’t exactly mentioned The Album yet.

  “I know.” He cricked his neck with his palm. “Never mind about that. I’ll end up fixing it all myself, weekend by weekend. Maybe it’s a good thing you’re busy with your new business now. You won’t be seeing much of me.”

  “I can help you out on Sundays.” She hovered over him, pondering whether to massage his tense shoulders. Poor chap, worked to the bone.

  “What? Then you won’t get any rest at all?”

  “I don’t know. Maybe helping you will give me a rest in a way.” They’d always enjoyed doing tasks together.

  “Nah. I don’t expect—”

  She punched his arm. “Don’t be such a martyr. I’m going to help you. What’s decided is decided.”

  “Getting stubborn in your old age?”

  “Mmmh.” She huffed at him. “I’m not old like you—you’re already getting wrinkles. I just noticed them now.”

  He stood up and grabbed her hands. “Don’t lie to me.”

  He pressed his nose and cross-eyes right near her face, the tiredness gone and a mischievous grin lighting his face. Close up, she took in his rainy-day grey eyes flecked with snowflakes, the centre dark and deep, sucking her in. His eyes had always fascinated her.

  “You’re just jealous that I’m two years older than you and a whole ton wiser,” he continued.

  “Wise. You?” She pulled away before he could tickle her.

  Ross had gotten into this tickling habit the last few months, and she didn’t feel right about it. She had her suspicions he was developing feelings for her, and really, that wouldn’t go down well at all. It would totally mess up their friendship and then, what would she do without him? Sure, her chicky friends were her life, but Ross was a great sounding block when her relationships with them went bad. And they’d had their moments. Plus, it was great to have a guy to call when she needed a handyman or car repair advice. Or just a logical shoulder to cry on. Not an emotional, PMS, mood-swing girly shoulder.

  He dug his fingers into her waist, but she pulled away and ran to the kitchen before he could tuck in. Her heart pounding with the chase and relief of breaking away before he got really into her, she pulled out some mugs and brewed some filter coffee in her coffee machine.

  The doorbell rang.

  “I’ll get it,” Ross shouted.

  Before she could stop him, he opened up, and she came round to stand before her very first customer. Well, she hoped it wasn’t a peddler o
r religious converter at her front door.

  “Hi, I’m looking for Ella Haviland.” The woman stood awkwardly, her face red from an obvious blush yet she wore a neat pants suit with her hair straightened and elegant, as if for an interview.

  “That’s me.” She swallowed as her mouth dried up.

  “I read on the Zululand Fever Website about your matchmaking business.”

  “That’s right.” Ella nodded, a big smile taking over her face and her heart doing crazy spins inside her body.

  “Well, I have… May I talk to you in private?” She glanced quickly at Ross.

  “Sure, of course. Come through to my office. Would you like some dark roast coffee? We just started brewing some.”

  “Oh, okay. That would be great. Thanks.” The lady stood beside her.

  She looked at Ross, hoping he’d help.

  “I’ll bring it through?” he asked.

  “Thanks, honey.” She squeezed his arm. He flinched. What was with the guy lately? It’s not like I’ve never called him that before.

  She led her client through to the office. Client. She’d always wanted to have her own clients. Silly, really.

  “Please take a seat. Now, what can I do for you?” She sat down at her dining room chair made into a temporary office seat until she could buy one of those swivel typist chairs.

  “Hi, my name’s Bernice, by the way. Bernice Collings. Um…well, I have a problem. I like two men at the same time.” She bit her lip, and her gaze flickered from her lap to around the room but nowhere near Ella’s face.

  “Hey, it happens to the best of us.”

  “Really?” She let out a breath and looked right at Ella. “I feel so terrible. I’ve been leading them on—I’m romantically involved with both, and I just can’t decide who to break up with. I think I love both of them.”

  Ouch!

  “I don’t know if you can help me. You mentioned in your advert that you don’t just match couples, but you can also advise on existing relationships. By the way, what qualifications do you have?”

  Ella had been expecting this question. Just not so soon.

  “Well, I have read up a lot on relationships. I follow several psychology blogs and have done some part-time courses on family relationships. I also counselled young people part-time at the Open Door Crisis Centre.” At least she could say that.

  “Okay.” Bernice nodded.

  “I think my biggest qualification is that I care. I’ve been through the mill with difficult relationships, and I can spot a fake a mile away. I want to help people bypass that suffering.”

  “Yeah, haven’t we all been there?” Her client visibly relaxed, assuring Ella her arguments had hit home.

  Ella nodded. Let her talk a bit, although inside, she screamed to try out The Album.

  “Look, I don’t know how to start.” She lifted her head up to the ceiling as if to find illumination there. “Let me tell you how I met them.”

  At that moment, Ross brought through their two coffees on a tray with sugar and milk.

  “You’re a star.” She blew him a kiss before he walked out.

  He stood by the door, frozen for a moment. Then disappeared. Huh?

  Bernice took some calming sips of coffee and then put her glass mug down to start her story.

  Ella listened and actually enjoyed the whole saga because she could identify with so many things she and her friends had been through mirrored in Bernice’s situation.

  “Well, that’s it. I hope you understand now why I can’t choose between the two.”

  “Really, you didn’t have to justify yourself.”

  “No, I do. If anyone knew…” She sighed. “I’m a home group leader at our church. I-I suppose I have a reputation to uphold.”

  Ella swept her hand across the desk. “Your heart is more important than your reputation. In the end, you have to live with whoever you choose. People’s opinions of us change from year to year.”

  “I know.” She nodded. “That’s why I’m here. I nearly didn’t come, but I’m glad I did.”

  “Okay. All I need is a photo of you and one of Steve and another of Rob. Leave them with me for a few hours.”

  Bernice narrowed her eyes at Ella.

  How did she do this without sounding cuckoo?

  “I want to consider what you have told me about your relationships with these men. I’ll also do some research on them on the Internet and social media—get a feel for what they’re like. You can fill in this questionnaire about yourself before you leave, too.” She handed her the questionnaire Pauline had designed specifically for the purpose of looking like a professional business and not a palm-reader. “If you come back on Monday night, I’ll tell you who I think will be best suited to making you happy forever. You are looking for a long-term relationship? I only work with those who—”

  “Of course I am. I love them both and want to spend the rest of my life with at least one of them.” She let out a shaky breath. “I feel like I’m going to rip out one of their hearts. How do I do this?”

  Ella stared into Bernice’s pretty blue eyes. “I don’t know. I don’t envy you one bit.”

  “You’re lucky—you’ve already got a decent guy. What guarantee do I have that the one I choose will want to spend the rest of his life with me?”

  Ella swallowed to hold back a choke. Bernice had thought Ross was her partner? She supposed calling him honey and blowing him a kiss could give someone that impression. Oh well, maybe Ross being here had given a good impression to her client—that she wasn’t single and had found love successfully. As much as she wanted to rectify the misconception, it wasn’t the focus of the interview. She took Bernice’s hand as she stretched to get the form and a pen. “I know you’re going to make the right decision. If what I advise you to do doesn’t sit well with you, then you’ll follow your heart anyway. I think I’m just like a magnifying glass or binoculars—revealing what’s hidden in your heart.”

  “Thank you, Ella. I feel at peace. I know it’s going to end well.” Scratching in her bag, she took out a photo of each man and a photo of herself. “Good thing I keep a photo of them with me and I had some extra passport photos in my bag. Else, I would have had to come back.”

  “You could always email them to me and I can print them out.”

  A sudden fear gripped her. What if The Album didn’t work again? Silly thought really, but this woman depended on her, was paying her for the job. She couldn’t mess up.

  While the young woman filled in the form, she sat there, the blood pounding in her ears and the tension building. Never would she have expected a situation like Bernice’s, and she hadn’t realised how much a part of her first client’s life she would feel. The Album had better work else she wasn’t going to poke around with people’s lives ever again.

  Once the form had been filled, she led the young woman out and promised to call her on Monday. Turning around, she searched for Ross. He sat in her study reading something on the laptop.

  “Thanks for making her the coffee.” She felt bad for asking his help like a servant.

  He turned to her and smiled. “You were in there quite a while. Did you help her?”

  “Not quite yet.” Should she tell Ross about The Album? What if he thought she risked everything for nothing? What if he criticized her impulsive decision? She’d always been so cautious.

  “So, you’re going to find her a handsome match?”

  “Um…this situation is a bit different. She’s already got… Never mind.” She began to walk out the room.

  “Wait, El.”

  Right now, she wanted him to leave. Usually, she enjoyed his peaceful, friendly company, but now, she wanted to go to The Album and put the photos in. In fact, she was supposed to call her three friends to watch the first official couple’s life unfold.

  “What?”

  “Do you want to find someone for me?”

  He grinned, and she stepped back, nearly bumping into the wall behind her.

>   “Sorry?”

  “I’m serious. I need a girlfriend. You even said it—it’s been over a year since I had a serious relationship.”

  “You said I’m being foolish starting this business and now you want to make use of my services?”

  He shrugged. Was he testing her? Seeing how well she did this?

  “I don’t know. I prefer not to match-make friends.” Not totally true, but her three girly friends had all decided that now they were fully involved in the business, they didn’t feel right about using The Album for their own counsel. Seemed like a ‘no friends’ rule made sense. And it had been a long time since Ross had been engrossed in another woman. She’d see him less.

  “Why? Because you’re not so sure of your abilities? I mean, what do you base it on? How do you match people up?” He narrowed his eyes at her.

  The light from the window filtered into the room, casting shadows across Ross’s face. It gave him a jagged, serious look. He wouldn’t let up—like a pit-bull holding onto its rope toy. When did he ever get so…what was it? Interrogative, picky, difficult?

  He stood up and came to her. Prickles ran up and down her arms. She’d never felt this vibe from him before—he’d always been so easy-going, just a friend to rely on, not…like a boyfriend—possessive, checking up on her, demanding. Hurt swirled around inside her, but she stood her ground, waiting for what he would say.

  He brought his hand up to her face and touched her cheek, his eyes silky soft and sending some weird sensation into her. She gasped at the strangeness.

  “I don’t want you to get hurt.” His tone sounded so intense.

  She pulled away. “I won’t. This is my dream.”

  “Exactly why I’m scared. A lot is dependent on this whim of yours.”

  “It’s not a whim.” Her voice came out a semi-scream.

  “I need proof it’s going to work.”

  She flung her hands down. “Oh, all right, then. You promise me you won’t tell a soul?”

  “What?”

  Close up, his skin glowed with a strong manliness. She’d never seen this side of Ross before and it sent her world into a spin. His deep concern, beyond the normal casual friendship, made her want to flee, but maybe it would pass. She just had to show him The Album.

  “Come.” No backing out now. My friends are gonna freak! She closed her eyes for a moment then sensed him staring at her, waiting.

  She took his hand and led him to the observatory. “Sit.”

  He sat in the client chair, frowning so deeply and his gaze intense, that she started giggling and clamped her hand over her mouth. “I can’t help it, Ross. You just look so serious.”

  “This is serious.”

  She stuck her tongue out at him. “Lighten up, will you. I swear, you’ve morphed into an old man overnight.”

  He smiled and some of the concern left his eyes. His shoulders relaxed and her world tilted back into place.

  “Right. Well, look at this book.” She pointed at The Album and then took the photo of Bernice and the photo of Steve to place on the frames on the first page.

  A strange jolt went through her as soon as she pressed the second photo down. She tried to shift them into the centre of the frame but they remained stuck as if glued to the page just like before. Her hands stayed on, too. She looked up at Ross who stared on, his face edged like cliff rock, his mouth a thin line. He said nothing, but his silence spoke volumes.

  “It’ll come. Just wait.”

  He shook his head. “What?”

  The jolts died down. Her hands came loose from their Velcro-ed position on the pages of the book and then she scribbled the names of Bernice and Steve on the lines below, in pencil.

  Rainbow light like the reflection of dust motes in the sunlight sent blotchy circles around the book. She couldn’t help grinning at Ross as his eyes opened wide at the overt display of magic.

  “What have you bought, Ella?” He reached out, and then withdrew his hand in caution.

  She ignored him. Opening the book, she turned to the next page. And the next. Followed by each subsequent one. Photos filled several pages. Photos of Steve and Bernice together, going shopping, traveling to a game park, kissing, sharing a meal. Photos of her with an engagement ring. Stunning shots of a wedding with Bernice in her beautiful cream gown and shimmery veil.

  “Aah,” she sighed. So Steve it was.

  Pictures of Bernice with a swollen stomach. A babe in arms. Her heart melted. How precious to see a—

  “Oh, no.”

  “What?” Ross made a closer scrutiny of The Album this time.

  “They’re fighting. Look at this picture. He’s pointing a finger at her and she’s crying. The next one—she’s driving away in a mad rush while he screams at her by the front door.”

  “What is this?”

  “There aren’t any more photos. The Album isn’t nearly full. How terrible.”

  Ross touched one of the pages as if it would burn him. “Is this like a crystal ball?”

  “More than that. It can reveal any scenario you wish to try. Any couple who are placed on the first two pages can see whether they will have a happy future together.”

  “Where did you get this?”

  “Uncle Stan.”

  “Uncle who?”

  “I know. I hardly knew him, either.” Ross was aware of almost every fine detail of her family life. She could understand his hesitation. The Album had surprised her in its intensity.

  “How do you know what this book predicts is really going to happen?” He gave her that look again.

  “I don’t. I trust it, though. Many people have been changed by the magic.”

  “You can never know unless you live forty years into the future. You’re playing with fire here, Ella.”

  “I want to do this.” She stood up, her chest straight. “Never wanted something so much in my life before. Don’t you see?” She pointed at The Album. “It’s going to change people’s lives for the better. They’ll never go for the wrong person again—never get their heart ripped out and stomped on.”

  “But that’s what makes it all beautiful.”

  “What are you talking about?” She shook her head. Ross had changed. He’d become way too deep and overbearing. And argumentative. Before, he’d confide all his hurt in her. They’d bear the burdens together. Now, he had this strange…bossiness. Had hurt made him too cynical?

  “If everything went so smoothly, we wouldn’t appreciate the right one. If we had to step straight into a perfect relationship first time round, well, there wouldn’t be anything special about it when we do find the right one.”

  He looked at her, his pupils large, his eyes intense, prying right into her soul. She had a feeling he meant something more directly related to them about what he said, but couldn’t think what. All she could work out was that he criticized her again and she’d had enough.

  “Look, Ross. This is my decision. I know I want to do this. And so do Andrea, Carol, and Pauline. You’re not going to stop us this time.”

  He stood up and closed The Album as if to shut out the offensive sight from his mind. “Your friends are great, El, but this time, they’re wrong. I don’t have a good feeling about this.” He shook his head. “I’d better be going.”

  “Okay.” Get rid of him. Maybe their friendship was doomed to die now with her dream coming true. Could it be he was jealous of her dream finally happening?

  “See you, El. Look after yourself.”

  Sounded like a final goodbye. Her heart lurched.

  “I’ll see you again, won’t I?” Her voice shuddered a little.

  He spun round. “What? You think I’d cut myself off from you completely because I don’t approve of what you’re doing?”

  She shrugged and held her quivering lip from wobbling stupidly before his gaze.

  “I’d never do that.” He pointed his finger at her in a skewed way. “No matter what, El, I’m always on your side. You can come to me any time.”
>
  His face softened and something stirred within her. Something she violently rejected with her mind and heart before he picked at her feelings. He was out the door before she had a chance to respond.

  Her hands couldn’t text quickly enough to let her friends know it had worked. She apologized profusely for trying without them, saying Ross pressured her, and then waited. A slew of messages arrived, questions flowing like water down a waterfall.

  “Come here & I’ll tell you everything. Better still. Come & watch. I have another pair of photos to try,” was her last text.

  While she waited for her friends to race over, she prepared a quick lunch and sat down to read through a blog she followed on the RSS feed on her phone. Her mind annoyingly replayed Ross’s last words to her. Firstly, that he had a bad feeling ‘about this’ and secondly, that he would stand by her no matter what. Who said that nowadays? Even her other friends didn’t say things like that. They showed it by their actions, but saying it? With such sincerity and seriousness? Ross acted so alpha all of a sudden. He didn’t accept her decisions like he used to. He seemed too invested in them now. Odd! What to do? Would their friendship last?

  Why did it bother her so much? She had a dream to fulfil and the best girly friends in the world. She didn’t have to have a male friend, too.