Read Loon Lake Page 18


  The afternoon before he left on his pilgrimage she took him to the Bunraku puppet theater. Each large puppet was manipulated by three figures in black hoods one for the right arm and spine and face including the lifting of the eyebrows one for the left arm one for the feet, the puppets moved dipped bowed gesticulated raised arms to heaven walked ran, each movement was accompanied by the three black shadows behind to the side and underneath and to further disintegrate the human idea the voices of the puppets their growling thrilling anguish was delivered from the side of the stage by a reader whose chants were punctuated by the plunks of the samisen like drops of water falling on a rock and Warren Penfield after several hours of this thought yes it’s exactly true, when I speak I hear someone else saying the words when I decide to do something someone else is propelling me when I look up at the sky or down at the ground I feel the talons on my neck how true what genius to make a public theater out of this why don’t we all stand up and tear the place apart what brazen art to tell us this about ourselves knowing we’ll sit here and not do a thing.

  The puppet play told the story of two lovers who, faced with adversity, decided to commit suicide together and so at the intimate crucial moment there were eight presences onstage.

  A cold bright sun glittering on the snow, dazzling the eyes, you couldn’t tell where you were, in what desolate tundra of the world. But men got to work. The stamping of thousands of feet muffled by the deep snow.

  Inside the Autobody the great clamoring noise seemed distant, a distant hum, as if the peculiar light reflecting the snow outside were a medium of shushing constraint.

  It was an ominous day, I felt something was wrong, from down the line it came like a conveyed thing, going through my station like a hunk of shapeless metal with no definable function.

  But I knew secrets, I was in on secrets.

  At lunchtime the whistle blew, belts slowed down and stopped. I listened to one generator in particular, pitch whine dropping deeper and deeper to nothing. I went to my locker, men rubbed their hands on rags and looked at each other. Then someone came in who thought he knew where the trouble was, and holding our sandwiches and thermoses, we drifted toward it, we climbed over the car bodies and trod the motionless belts as if walking on tracks, and we came finally to an area flooded with bright daylight.

  Two great corrugated sliding doors were open, I could see outside to a flatbed railroad car. Granulated snow gusting in. Sticking to spots of oil and grease. The cold sting of the day blowing in.

  “Here, you men, you don’t belong here!” A uniformed guard coming toward us with a scowl.

  They were dismantling a whole section of machines, unbolting them from the floor and preparing to hoist them on pulleys. Someone said they were tool-and-die machines for the radiator grilles.

  At quitting time I waited in front of the tavern across the street from the main gate. Red didn’t show up. I walked quickly in the dark down Railroad Street.

  “The train I ride on is a hundred coaches long, you can hear the whistle blow nine hundred miles. You see, Joe, when the New Year comes soon as everone’s past the Xmas bonus, soon as everone begins to think a the spring layoffs as you cain’t help but doin when the year swings round, that’s when we’re a-settin down. You understand the beauty o’ that? The union’s allotin considerable monies. You see what you don’t know is that Number Six makes all the trim for the Bennett plants in three states. Do you take my meanin? Ever bumper. Ever hubcap. Ever runnin board. Ever light. When we set down come January, ever Bennett plant in Michigan, Ohio and Indiana is gonna feel it. ’Course I’m trustin you with this, you cain’t tell no one, it’s a powerful secret compris’n the fate of many. Ohh-oh me, ohh-oh my, you can hear the whistle blow nine hundred miles.”

  When I got home Clara wasn’t there. I went next door. She was standing in the bedroom doorway holding Sandy’s baby.

  Two men were sitting in the parlor. They were dressed in work clothes. Sandy introduced me, they were members of the board of the local and I thought I recognized one of them from the meeting. He was a skinny little man and he didn’t look at me as he talked. “Yeah, Paterson,” he said, “I seen you around.” His eyes darted to the phone on the desk.

  The other man was younger, bulkier, he had a fixed smile on his face as if he had trained himself to it. “We’re waitin fer Red,” he said.

  They sat back down. Sandy James didn’t know what to do with them, she stood there rubbing her palms on her hips. The parlor was awfully crowded, I thought, with all of us and a Christmas tree too with the tip touching the ceiling the star awry.

  “You and James buddies, Paterson?” the little man said.

  “Yes.”

  He nodded, kept nodding as if unaware of the brevity of my answer.

  And then the phone rang and he jumped up as if he had been waiting, and grabbed the receiver. “Yeah,” he said, “yeah, that’s it.” He hung up.

  “Well,” he said looking at the other one, “I guess we’ll be on our way,” indicating the door with his chin. “Sorry to trouble you, Mrs. James.”

  “Red should be home right soon.”

  “No, no, that’s okay,” the little man said. “Just tell him we were in the neighborhood. Nothin important.”

  They left, she locked the door after them.

  “Oh, it gives me the jitters,” she said, “strangers comin round and askin questions.”

  “Like what?”

  “Where we got our lovely furnishins? How long we had the radio?” I went over to the desk, for the first time I noticed the phone had no number written on it the little white circle was blank.

  “Where is Red?”

  Sandy looked at me and down at the floor.

  “Come on, Sandy, for God’s sake,” I said.

  “To a meetin,” she said. “A secret union meetin.”

  “A board meeting?”

  “I guess.”

  I didn’t argue with her. I motioned to Clara and we went back to our side. The house, banked with snow, was without draught, sealed, like a tomb. I didn’t know why but I felt bad, I felt desolate, I didn’t care about anything.

  “Hey, big boy,” Clara said. “Let me see you smile.”

  Later in our bed I was so huge with love for her it was a kind of mourning sound I made, plunged into my companion. The ceiling light was on. Her head was turned from me, her eyes were closed, her knuckles were in her teeth, high color spread up from her throat suffusing her face, her ears, this was not my alley cat of gasping contempt raking her nails down my back this was my wife connected to me by the bones of being, oh this clear ecstasy ravage on the skin, reluctance it was happening, lady’s grief of coming.

  I said to Red James, “Will you tell me what’s going on?,” my voice feeble and complaining. I already knew in this town of thirty thousand the crucial action was at my eyes, I was centered in it, it could not be less clear than something I would read in the newspaper. I was at the fulcrum where the smallest movement signified distant matters of great weight.

  And he answered wonderfully not as if he had until this moment deceived me but as if I’d always known and admired him for what he was.

  “See, Joe, I coulda stayed on, you know? Hell, I had it so finely made I mighta run for somethin someday in the national. But the client don’t give a hoot fer that. He gets the intelligence and he spooks like a horse in a hurricane. I mean I’d laugh if I didn’t feel like cryin.”

  We were walking home men everywhere talking in groups LAYOFFS! in the headlines flyers announcing a mass meeting trampled in the snow. Red suggested we stop in for a drink. We stood in front of a tavern I’d not been in before, the light in the window was gold and orange, it looked warm in there, I felt I’d better have something.

  We sat in a booth in the back under a dip in the patterned ceiling. Behind us was the door to the toilet. We sat in this plywood booth drinking twenty-cent shots with water chasers I smelled the whiskey in my head odor of piss cigarette smoke the sweat
of every man in the room.

  “’Course I ain’t without choice, they’s a little job at the Republic Steel in Chicago. Ain’t no auto worker in Jacksontown gonna follow me to pull steel in Chicago. An’ ifn there is, just in case, looky here.”

  He pulled a paper bag from his lunch pail, shook a small bottle uncapped it put a drop of liquid on his right index finger rubbed the liquid into the red hairs on the knuckles of his left hand. He spread the hand on the table: the red hairs were black.

  “You like that?” he grinned, my stunned silence, he signaled the bartender for two more. “But hell, I’m thinkin to drop industrial work. You been to the city of Los Angeleez?”

  I shook my head.

  “Well, they’s a need for operators there. They’s so much messin around what with them movie stars and all, you see, ever good wife needs to make her case sooner or later, if you get my meanin. As does ever good husband. Yessir, they’s opportunity in Los Angeleez.”

  He was nervous, talking with much careless confidence his glance kept flying up to the room behind me and coming back to me and flying off. It happened in the crowded bar that the lower register of his voice was lost in the babble of the room, so half of what he said I couldn’t hear, I only saw the trouble he was in enacted on his face, in the animated appearance of him spiky unshaven red hair around the Adam’s apple, the suddenly large teeth threatening to engulf his chin, pale white eyelashes pink-lidded eyes staring through their mask.

  Joe was suspended, blasted. Gone was the wiseass street kid, gone in love, gone in aspiration, gone in the dazzlement of the whole man, the polished being.

  “See, if the union was smart they wouldn’t never let on they knowed. Take their losses this hand, play for the next, string me along without me knowin and use me against the company and tell me one thing and do another and trick Bennett right out of their shoes. An’ shit, everyone woulda made out all around, the union ’cause they knowed ’bout me, the company still thinkin they had their inside op, and me still drawin my pay in good faith and doin my work.”

  He slumped against the back of the booth. “Hell, it’s all the same anyways, the boys’ll get their wages and grievance committees and such and it won’t matter, the company’ll just hike their prices, everthin’ll be the same. But you see, they let me know they know and the company knows they know and I’m not good to anyone anymore leastwise to myself and now I gotta take that poor chile and move her out of her home.”

  “Red, it is so weird! You recruited me!”

  “I surely did. I brought in numbers a good men an’ true.”

  “Let me ask you, does Sandy know?”

  “What, about me bein a detective? Aw, Joe,” he said with a grin, “the poor chile has so much of a man in me already did I tell her the whole truth she’d go out of her natural mind with love!”

  It now occurred to me to ask why I had been told. I was at the point of perceiving his peculiar genius, which was to make a lie even of the truth. He was waving his hand, calling someone, I turned just as two men arrived at the table.

  “Set yourself down!” Red greeted them.

  One slid in beside me, the other beside Red. I had never seen them before. They were heavy middle-aged men, one wore a suit and tie and coat with the collar turned up, the other had on a lumber jacket and a blue knit cap.

  “See,” Red said to them without any preamble, “I ain’t sayin I didn’t make a mistake. I don’t want you to think that, whatever happens.”

  “That’s all right, Mr. James,” the one in the overcoat said. He was sitting next to me. He pointed at me with his thumb. “And this is him?”

  “My good friend and neighbor Mr. Paterson,” Lyle Red James said.

  “I see,” the man in the overcoat said. He twisted in his seat and leaned back to look at me.

  The fellow across from him pulled off his cap. He sat hunched over the table holding the cap in his fists. He was a white-haired man and his florid face was covered with gray stubble. He now spoke, his eyes lowered. “James,” he said, “there is a particular place in hell, in fact its innermost heart, where reside for eternity the tormented souls of men of your sort. They freeze and burn at the same time, their skin is excoriated in sulfurous pools of their accumulated shit, the tentacles of foul slimy creatures drag them under to drink of it. This region is presided over by Judas Iscariot. You know the name, I trust.”

  Red began to laugh. “Aw, come on,” he said, incredulous, “that ain’t no kind of talk.”

  Then this man with the cap in his hands turned to Red and looked at him. I saw tears in his eyes. “On behalf of every workingman who has gone down under the club or been shot in the back, I consign you to that place. And may God have mercy on my soul, I will go to hell too, but it’ll be a joyful thing if I can hear your screams and moans of useless contrition from now till the end of time.”

  “Hey, brother,” Red James said, “come on now, you ain’t even tried to see if I’m tellin the truth. That ain’t exactly fair!”

  Both men had risen. The man with the blue knit cap leaned over and spit in Red’s face. The two of them made their way into the crowd and went out the door.

  Red was impassive. He splashed some water from his glass onto his handkerchief and washed himself. He glanced at me. “Catholic fellers,” he said.

  A few minutes later we left the bar. My blood was lit with two whiskeys, and with the imagery of sin and death in my brain I wanted to ask him more questions—questions!—as if I didn’t already know, like some fucking rube I beg your pardon would you spell it out for me please! Clara, I still had time, there was still time for me to get her and throw our things in a bag and get us the hell out of there. Instead I walked with Red James down Railroad Street in this peculiar identification I made with him, as if only he could guard me from what I had to fear from him, and on Railroad Street where it made a sharp turn there was a shortcut across an empty lot the moon was out and going across this terrain Red glanced at me as I tried to phrase my questions he looked at me with genuine curiosity, as if, with all his figuring he had not figured me to be, in this outcome, that stupid. And we went across the snow moon of the frigid night making our way to our joined homes and fates as if nothing had happened and two ordinary workers had only stopped for a drink in the time-honored way. He was singing now in his nasal tenor the ritual that comes on the excommunicated