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Losing Charley (Full Circle #1)

  By Casey Peeler

  Copyright 2015 Casey Peeler

  This book is a written act of fiction. Any places, characters, or similarities are purely coincidence. If certain places or characters are referenced it is for entertainment purposes only. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

  No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews. The author recognizes all copyright and trademarks that are mentioned within this work of fiction.

  Dedicated to the Zoo Crew. Thank you for always being there! I love y’all more than you know!

  Table of Contents

  Prologue

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  About the Author

  Prologue

  July 20, 2012

  My body feels like it is about to turn to complete mush as I place my wet swimsuit into my locker after practice. I brush my hair and grab my bag as I head out of the locker room of the Grassy Pond Aquatic Center (GPAC).

  “Oh shit, Dylan! You scared the hell outta me!” I yell and playfully hit his arm as I run right into him when I enter the hallway. Dylan pulls me into the closest corner and kisses me with force and desire. He has the perfect body, perfect hands, perfect mouth, just damn near perfect everything. He’s like a bad habit I can’t break, my own form of crack. Once I got one taste of him, I had to have more. I’m freakin’ strung out on Dylan Sloan. As he kisses my lips, my body falls into his control. Just as my body moves in rhythm with his, I’m brought back to reality with the shutting of the locker room door. I pause briefly, but when I realize it’s a few freshman, I smirk at Dylan and continue for a few more moments before using every ounce of strength I have to push his smoldering lips off mine.

  “We better stop. If Coach sees us, then we'll have to work double time tomorrow.”

  “Charley, really?” Biting the corner of my lip, I smile at him. He takes me by the hand and pulls me through the exit and straight toward the parking lot.

  “What are you doin’?” I ask even though I already know the answer.

  “We’re finishing this out here since you’re afraid coach is gonna catch us,” he says with a smirk.

  Placing my hands on my hips playfully, “Dylan Sloan, I know you don’t think you’re going to have your way with me in the pool parking lot do you?”

  A flash of annoyance runs across his face, “Come on Charley, you’re seriously gonna just stop after getting me worked up like that?”

  Shrugging my shoulders, I wrap my arms around him, and kiss him gently. As I pull away, he places his forehead on mine.

  “You do realize you’re gonna be the death of me?” I don’t reply, instead, I kiss him sweetly one more time.

  “There's a party tonight at Trent’s on the West Side. You’re going with me. I'll pick ya up around seven.”

  “I’ll get Piper to cover for me,” I say with a wink. Since Dylan and I have started dating, Piper has been my cover more than once. There’s just something about Dylan. He’s always ready to have a good time and I’ve always liked to let loose just enough.

  “I like the way your brain works.” He slaps me playfully on the ass as we walk to our cars.

  “Just text me the plan. I can't wait to see you tonight.” He kisses me one more time before I get into my Honda and text Piper before heading home.

  Me: U got plans 2nite?

  Piper: Heard there’s a party on West Side.

  Me: Dylan wants me to go with him & I need

  cover.

  Piper: U got it, might see u there Justin txt me

  earlier.

  Me: Ur the best, I'll fill you in on the night

  Tomorrow:)

  I turn on the dirt road that leads to our farm. Knowing I’m about to lie to my parents, I put on my game face as I approach our old farmhouse. I notice my mom and dad are loading up the Chevy 2500HD and cow trailer. That’s weird. I cut off the car, grab my swim bag and walk toward the truck.

  “What y’all doing?” I ask my mom.

  “Your dad just got a call that the cows need to be at the sale in Athens by six a.m. tomorrow.”

  “Are you serious? That’s like what five hours away or somethin’.”

  “Charley, I know it seems crazy for us to go that far on such short notice, but they are paying big down there. Tessa is working and going to Kim’s for the night. I figured you could stay here and keep an eye on the farm. We should be back late tomorrow.”

  “Yeah, I can do that. Y’all need me to help ya finish loading up?” Seriously, how did I manage not to have to lie about my plans tonight? Score!

  “Nah, we’re good. Just make sure you go check on the goats near Cash’s. Joker keeps jumping the fence,” Dad says.

  “All right, love y’all and be careful.” I give Mama and Dad a hug, go into the house and squeal like a giddy schoolgirl while doing a happy dance. Never in a million years would they let me stay out late at a party with Dylan if they were home, and they sure wouldn’t leave me alone if they knew that was the plan for tonight.

  Me: Parents gone tonight no need for cover,

  see ya at 7

  Dylan: Ur j/k right?

  Me: Nope :)

  Dylan: Plans just might have to change…

  Me: Ur not getting lucky

  Dylan: :(

  Me: U know I’m not that way

  Dylan: Maybe I can change ur mind… see you

  at 7

  Me: XOXO

  I go into the house, grab a Choice Cherry Gold, pop the top and look for a bite to eat. I’m starved! I scan the fridge and notice that Mama has left a chicken pie for us to eat. I fix my plate and scarf it down. All I know is if Coach keeps up these two-a-day practices, I don’t know if I’ll be standing at the end of the summer. Oh crap. I gotta text Piper.

  Me: No rents tonight, no cover, thanks girlie :)

  Piper: Really??

  Me: Yup! D thinks he’s getting lucky tonight lol

  Piper: LMAO! He should know better. You’re such a tease! Call me

  later

  I look at the clock, and it’s almost 5:30. I better get a move on. I’ve got to get all this chlorine out of my hair. I turn on the radio to my favorite country station, crank up the volume, and make my way to the bathroom to get ready. I use my most favorite scent in the world, Aruba Coconut. I decide that I need to look beyond hot tonight for Dylan. I know exactly what I’m wearing—Miss Me Jeans, a hot pink tube top and a black bow stretch belt. Heck, I decide to ditch my boots tonight for black wedges.

  As I get ready, I look into the mirror. If I’m going to look hot for Dylan tonight, I have to do something a little different. I add darker eyeliner to my light blue eyes, apply just enough shadow, blush, and bronzer to my porcelain skin, and finish my look with berry-colored lipstick. If I’m the girl on his arm, then I need us to look like we’re a match made in heaven. With that thought, I decide to roll my hair to give it extra body and a totally sexy look.

  As I wait for the curlers to cool, I can’t help but think about the first time Dylan asked me out. It was right after the state swim meet. We both placed first in our events. Our relays were in the top two, and Dixon High was State Champions. We were scre
aming with excitement. The next thing I knew Dylan was hugging me and looking at me with those eyes. I knew he was bad news. He was a love ‘em and leave ‘em kind of guy, but I didn’t care. He chose me, and I chose him. And for some reason, he had never pushed the sex issue. I just didn’t do that kind of thing, and I was upfront about that from the beginning. Not to say I don’t like to have a good time because I do. He was everything I liked in a guy— tall, short dark chocolate brown hair, a hot body that doesn’t leave much to the imagination in a Speedo, washboard stomach, tattoos, and as competitive as me.

  I’m ready by 6:45 and decide to watch a little CMT. I hear the exhaust of his Black 2011 Mustang coming down the drive. Why am I so nervous tonight? I leave the porch light on and head to the car. As I get in, Dylan looks at me.

  “What!” I say with a smile because I know exactly why he is looking at me with those eyes.

  “Damn, Charley, are you trying to kill me?”

  “I just wanna look good for ya.” I give him a soft, sweet kiss and then we head down the dirt road on the way to the party.

  We make our way to town and arrive at Trent’s on the West Side. Dylan hops out and grabs his cooler from the trunk. I check my makeup in the visor mirror and get out as well. Dylan grabs my hand and gives me a look like he’s up to something.

  “D, please tell me there are Fatty Nattys in there,” I say with my hands on my hips.

  “You’ll just have to find out, won’t ya?” He says putting the cooler behind his back. I know exactly what he’s wanting, and I plan on playing along.

  Taking a step forward, I place my arms around his waist. Looking into his eyes, I make by body flush with his and bring my lips toward his. As a smile spreads across his face, our lips meet and tangle with each other. Without breaking our heated kiss, I grasp the cooler, pop the lid, slide my arm inside and shiver as my hand comes in contact with the can. Dylan stifles a laugh within our kiss. Retrieving the can, I slow my kiss and take a step from Dylan as I open the can, and I look directly at him as the can meets my lips and I drink in the crisp liquid.

  Dylan retrieves the cooler from behind his back, and takes a step toward me. “It’s official. You’re trying to kill me.” I shrug my shoulders and smirk. He shakes his head then laces his fingers into mine as we walk into Trent’s.

  Since I’ve been with Dylan, I’ve experienced a lot of drinking and partying, as well as first, second, and third base. He wants a homerun, but I’m just not ready for that. I want to make sure the person is the one. I want my own fairytale, and before I take a relationship to that level, I want to know it’s forever.

  The first thing I notice when we enter the house is there is more than the usual crowd here. I see a ton of people that are older than me, but it is summer and most people haven’t gone back to college yet. Dylan takes me into the kitchen and places our cooler in the corner. I finish my Fatty Natty and pull another from the cooler. Dylan keeps me close to him as we head over to talk to Trent. Until Dylan and I started dating, I didn’t party too much, not saying that I never attended one but I guess being the oldest child I never wanted to go against my parent’s wishes. As we walk through the house it’s obvious the effect Dylan has on everyone in the room. He is Mr. Popular at Dixon High, and like a magnet, all the girls and teachers are drawn to him immediately. It amazes me how a guy can just walk into the room and have all the girls swarm to him. What makes me smile is the fact that I know I’m the one he loves and treasures.

  Knowing I have the hottest guy at school who likes me for me makes my heart warm. We share the same dream, and if all goes as planned, that dream will come true. We hope to go Division I in swimming after we graduate in May. For me, the drawback to our dream is Dylan’s possessiveness. He likes me to be at his beck and call. He doesn’t want me to hang out with Cash or my other friends like I used to.

  After talking to Trent for a while, the music begins to thump in the night, and I’d give anything to be on the dance floor right now. As my body begins to involuntarily move to the music, I look at Dylan and wink. Letting go of his hand, I make my way to the makeshift dance floor in the living room.

  In true party fashion, there are plenty of girls trying their best to entice a guy to dance with them. As the beat picks up, I sway my hips a little harder and pull my long blonde locks onto my right shoulder. Feeling someone come up behind me, it’s obvious it’s not Dylan, and as I glance over my shoulder I realize it’s Piper. Letting out a laugh, we let loose and as the song changes, I see Dylan standing against the wall with his arms crossed and a crooked grin. Pointing toward him, I tell him to come to me. When he shakes his head, it leaves me no choice but to cut up even more with Piper.

  Within seconds, Dylan is cutting in, and on me like white on rice. Pressing his body against me, it’s obvious the effect I have on him. He can’t keep his hands off me. They are in my hair, tracing up and down my arms, neck, waist, and legs. Inside, my body is playing tug-of-war with what I know is right. Realizing we are putting on a show for the world to see, I pull him from the dance floor and make our way to our own private area on the back porch. Dylan takes a seat in the rocking chair, and I straddle him. I kiss him on his forehead and make my way down to his lips and neck. We mess around and just have fun. Knowing I don’t have parents at home lets me cut loose, but I’m still in control.

  As the porch begins to get crowded, we slow our pace, and drink another beer or two. Around midnight, it dawns on me. Joker. That damn goat!

  “Dylan, you gotta get me home. I forgot to check on Joker.”

  He rolls his eyes. “Seriously, Charley! We can’t leave now. We were just getting started.”

  “If it was any other night, I would have had to be home already.”

  His eyes light up when it dawns on him that my parents aren’t home tonight. “All right, let me get the cooler and tell Trent we’re out.”

  “I’m gonna run to the bathroom. Hold my beer. I’ll be right back.”

  I hurry back to Dylan, pound my beer and head out the door. About halfway home, I start to feel like I’m not in my own body. I know the car is moving, but it’s like a total out-of-body experience. I begin to feel like I’m going to puke, but I know I haven’t had enough to be that drunk.

  “Dylan, I don’t feel so good.”

  “You want me to stop and get you something to eat?”

  “Yeah, that might help.”

  I try to eat my burger, but for some reason, I can’t seem to find my mouth. Before I know it, we are pulling onto my dirt road and approaching my house. Dylan looks at me with a strange expression that makes my insides quiver. He takes the burger from me and discards it in the bag. His eyes now look raw and hungry. What is wrong with him? I try to open the door, but I can’t seem to find the handle. Dylan walks around the car to open my door for me. When he realizes I’m not able to move, he carries me from the car, unlocks the door and takes me upstairs to my bed.

  He removes my wedges and helps me lie down on the bed. I’m so glad that he’s taking care of me. My eyes are extremely heavy. I try to keep them open, but struggle. Before I can put everything together, Dylan is on top of me, kissing me hard. Too hard. He continues to kiss me like I’m property as he takes off my jeans. I try to push his body off mine, but I can’t. What the hell is he trying to pull? Everything is starting to get fuzzy, but I manage to say the most important words I can to make him stop.

  “Dylan, what the fuck are you doin’? Stop! I said STOP!” I continue to try to push him off me, but it’s no use. He continues to take full control of me.

  “Shhhhhh. Please don’t make this harder than it has to be. I’ve been patient, but I’m tired of it. We can do this one of two ways, willing or unwilling,” he snarls.

  “I said get the fuck off me!” I scream while I dig my nails into his arm.

  “That’s not going to help,” he says with a devilish smile.


  In my heart I know I don’t stand a chance. He’s strong and overpowering. I cry and scream, but it is no use. There is no one at home and there are acres upon acres separating my farm from another person. He is in full control. Once he finishes, he kisses me gently and leaves. I want to throw up; instead, I curl into a ball as the tears begin to fall. I’m home alone, and a night I thought was going to be special, has turned into the biggest nightmare of my life. I decide that I have to be strong. I force myself to stop crying. I tell myself that I am fine. Trying to forget what has happened, I focus on what needs to be done, shower and check on the damn goat. I try to move, but I can’t. What am I going to do? I just want to forget. Wait? What the hell did he do to me at that party? I notice my phone is on my nightstand. If I can grab it, I can text Cash.

  Me: $ wiiill u ck on Jker? (Will you check on

  Joker?)

  Cash: R u drunk?

  Me: no, pplease (No, please)

  Cash: U sure ur ok?

  Me: Yup

  Cash: k

  I try to force myself up, but I can’t. It’s like I’m dead weight. My body feels dirty, violated, and I have to wash him off me. As I’m trying to figure out how to move, I hear the front door close. Oh God, no. Please don’t let it be Dylan. I start praying to God.

  Lord, PLEASE protect me. Keep me safe and forgive him. Amen

  “Charley!” Then there is a pause. “Char!” I hear Cash calling. Oh shit, he’s going to have a come apart! What am I going to do? I look around the room to grab my clothes, but it’s no use.

  I can hear him coming up the stairs. He knocks on my door as he walks in. That is a habit for us, along with no secrets.

  “Char, Joker’s fine. Whoa! What the fuck happened here?” His eyes roam the scene in front of him, taking in my ruffled bedspread and the position I’m lying in.

  I swallow hard trying to get the words to come out, but it’s not working. My body begins to shake as tears begin to stream down my face until the floodgates open and I can’t turn them off. Cash takes me in his arms and holds me until my body stops shaking.

  Cash’s arms pull me in tighter as he turns my face toward his. “I want the whole truth.” I try to answer but there are no words. Fury flashes across Cash’s face. “If that asshole did this, I’m going to make him pay.” Looking into his eyes, it’s obvious that he’s struggling with what to do. Deep down, I try to search for the words, but I find nothing.

  Dropping his hand, he moves from the bed, and begins to pace the floor. What is he going to do? Digging deep within my soul, I manage a few words.

  “Cash, please.”

  “Did he hurt you?” he asks as he approaches my bed.

  All I can do is shake my head yes as the tears begin to fall faster. He sits on my bed and pulls me into his side. Seeing the struggle in his eyes, I know that Cash is ready to leave me and kill Dylan, but I can’t let that happen.

  “Please, Cash, don’t do anything. I’m begging you. I told him no, but he didn’t care. I just need you to help me, Cash. My body feels like a boulder. I can’t move, and I have got to get what’s left of him off me. You have to help me!”

  I can see the struggle in Cash’s eyes. “You know I want to walk down those stairs, out of the house, find him and rip his balls off?”

  “Please Cash, I need you.”

  “You better be glad I love you so much.”

  Cash carries me to the bathroom. Looking into his eyes, I see them fill with water. He sits me on the toilet while he turns on the water. Watching every move he makes, I notice he uses his sleeve to wipe his tear-filled eyes. He turns and places me in the tub. When he realizes I can’t do this alone. He asks me if it’s okay to touch me, when I nod yes he washes away the remnants of Dylan. He takes my shampoos and washes my hair and cleans me from head to toe. You would think that I wouldn’t be able to have another guy touch me, but it’s different with Cash. He knows me, and I have trusted him since I was four years old. He would never hurt me.

  When I’m clean, he helps me out of the tub and wraps me in a towel. He dresses me in my favorite pajamas, brushes my hair and carries me to my room. As he places me on the vanity chair, tears begin to fall again as he removes the linen from my bed.

  “I can’t sleep here, Cash. Not after that. Please, take me to the club.”

  The club is our place. When we were five, our dads built us a clubhouse. It was made of wood and tin. It had a window overlooking the pond where we fished. We practically lived there. As we got older, we made it more of a hangout with the modern technologies: a futon, fridge, and electricity. Now, we use it as a place to escape to when life gets rough.

  “You got it.”

  He scoops me into his perfectly chiseled arms built from working endless days on the farm and places me in the cab of his truck. He drives to the back of the field. Cash carries me up the ladder, turns on the lantern, lays me on the futon and wraps me in his arms. I feel safe and loved as my world is falling down around me and I fall asleep.

  As the sun began to peek through the club window, my eyes try to open but it’s the pounding in my head that brings last night back to the forefront. As I try to move, Cash’s arms loosen from around me, but still give a safe presence. When I pry my eyes open, I look at Cash. His eyes are tired, and I know he hasn’t slept. Taking a deep breath, I try my best to push the tears back, but it’s no use. My body begins to crumble and with my first sound Cash pulls me back into his strong arms. He saved me last night, and I owe him my life.

  “Char, whatcha wanna do today?” Cash asks in almost a whisper.

  “Can we hide out here all day?” He gives a half grin, and holds me tighter in his arms.

  “Honestly, Charley, I guess the better question is how are we going to handle today. Your parents will be home this afternoon,” he says as he looks at me for clues.

  “I don’t know Cash. I mean, maybe, I can just tell them we had a fight at the party and broke up. Heck, maybe I should just quit the team too.” I say as tears begin to form in my eyes.

  “Don’t cry Char. Please don’t cry. Maybe I can go with you to practice or hang out nearby in case you need me.”

  I wipe my eyes and shake my head no. “You can’t do that because someone’s bound to think that’s weird. Besides, I’ve just got to make it through my senior year, and I don’t have to worry about him anymore.”

  “I think that might be harder than you think, and I don’t think your parents are going to believe you. You eat, sleep, and breathe swimming.”

  “Well, they are going to have to,” I say with a little attitude as I stand, and Cash throws up his hands in surrender.

  Walking toward the club’s window, I grab my fishing rod and the loaf bread. As I attach the loaf bread to the hook, Cash is beside me doing the same. He doesn’t say a word as I toss my line into the water and he follows behind. Sometimes no words need to be spoken because silence says it all.

  By lunch, we make our way to my house, and we make sure everything is back to “normal.” Cash and I have both put off the duties of the farm all morning, and it’s inevitable that we will have to go our separate ways soon. As if he’s reading my mind, Cash opens his arms and I walk to them. Embracing me in the only arms I trust, tears stream silently down my face. He takes my chin and pulls it up to him.

  “Char-coal, I don’t want to leave you, but we have to if we want things to be normal. If you need me for anything, call me, and I’ll answer no matter what. Okay?”

  “Okay,” I say softly. “Cash I don’t know what I’d do without you. Thank you for being here for me. You are the best friend a girl could ask for.” He holds me tight for a few minutes then steps away. I walk him outside and as he walks down the steps on the front porch he turns to me, and smiles. In this moment, I know that I will survive, and Cash will always be by my side.

  Around three o’clock, my phone rings, a
nd my nerves are on edge when I see Dylan’s name appear. To answer or not? Taking a deep breath, I answer.

  “What do you want?” I ask with hatred laced in my voice.

  “I’m sorry Charley. I don’t know what got into me. Will you please forgive me?”

  Pausing and taking a deep breathe, I reply. “Hell no, I won’t forgive you. In fact, please don’t ever call or talk to me again. It’s over between us, and there’s no way in hell I’d every forgive you for what you did to me.”

  There is silence on his end before he says, “Look, I said I’m sorry. I can’t change what happened, but I never meant to hurt you.” I begin to laugh and can’t control myself. He has lost his damn mind. “You think this is funny?” he questions.

  “No it’s not funny, but the fact that you actually thought I’d bow right back down to you is hilarious. Goodbye Dylan Sloan.” I hope I sounded confident because I’m shaking like a leaf.

  Trying to sound confident in myself, I start to call Cash when Tessa’s voice startles me from behind.

  “Dang, I don’t know what happened, but you put him in his place,” she says as she props against the doorway.

  “He’s an ass, and we’re over,” I state hoping she won’t notice that I’m shaking.

  She shrugs her shoulders and smiles as she walks toward me. I feel my insides begin to crumble. “I never like him anyway. Dad’s gonna think he hit the lottery. He never liked him either,” she says as she hugs me, and I know my sister won’t ask anything else.

  “I just hope they don’t ask a gazillion questions or mama that I,” I state, and we both laugh because she will for sure.

  Tessa and I make plans for supper and as we begin to make the salad we see our parents pulling down the road. My heart begins to pound as the past twenty-four hours play in my head and I have no idea how I'm going to lie to Mama and Dad.

  After helping our parents unload, we all sit down for supper. We ask daddy about the sale, and then mama asks about last night. Quickly, I stuff a bite of salad in my mouth as I prepare to talk.

  “Um, well, Dylan and I broke up.” Daddy about chokes on his tea and mama can’t hide the grin from her lips.

  “Do you care to explain?” Mama asks.

  “Well, let’s just say I saw his true colors. He’s not who I need to be with, but I also don’t know how I’m going to tolerate being around him at practice. I think I might quit.”

  Mama takes a moment to process what I told them. “Char, I understand y’all broke up, but he’s just a guy. I think you went a little boy crazy over him, but that’s no reason to quit what you love.”

  “Mama, I just can’t be around him. So this is the easiest solution. Now drop it. Maybe one day I’ll change my mind, but not right now.” I don’t give her time to reply as I place my dishes in the sink, grab my keys, and walk out the front door.

  Driving to the pool to clean out my locker I vow, that from this day forward, Cash will be the only one to know my secret, that I will avoid Dylan at all costs, and I will act normal and continue to hang out with my friends like nothing happened. Now if only my insides weren’t crumbling into pieces. Thank goodness for Cash, my only lifeline.

  Each day things get easier thanks to Cash. He is the first person I speak to each morning and the last before I fall asleep. Spending every waking moment together, we do the things we love - fishing, working on the farm, swimming, and he even lets me pick cheesy chick flicks without complaint. When he sees I’m down, he lifts me up, and every time there’s a chance of running into Dylan he’s there to protect me. Little by little I begin to feel like myself again, but it’s his security that allows me to do so.