an hour,” he said. “If you haven’t texted me with your answer by four o’clock, I’ll tell everyone at school tomorrow.” Piper nodded. She turned and walked away from Marcus. Deep in thought, she held her head down and her hands in her pockets.
On her return, Piper headed straight for the kitchen where Katie was waiting. Katie watched as Piper filled and turned on the kettle, she then crossed the room and wrapped her arms around Katie. “We can’t be together anymore,” Piper said. Katie looked shocked. This was not what she had been expecting.
“What did Marcus say?” Katie demanded.
“He said he would tell the whole school if I dumped him,” she said. “And I can’t have that, Katie, I just can’t.” Tears began to form in Piper’s eyes as she stared at Katie. Katie took a deep breath.
“I hope that one day you realise what a mistake you’re making,” And for what? A little bit of fear?” she said. Katie turned and left the room. Seconds later Piper heard the front door slam. She wiped the tears from her eyes before reaching into her pocket for her phone.
It’s over. I choose you.
Confusion
Sometimes the person you really need
is the one you didn’t think you wanted.
Anonymous
Her fingers gently trailed their way down my arm to my wrist. Once there, she took my hand in hers, interlocking her fingers into mine.
“Do you want me?” she whispered. I looked down at our entwined hands. I wanted her more than I had ever admitted, even to myself. I looked up and my eyes met hers.
“Kiss me,” I murmured. I didn’t need to say anything else as she leaned closer to me pressing her lips against mine. We stayed that way for several minutes until she pulled away and opened her mouth to say.
December, 2010
“Miss Little,” a voice said. “Miss Little, are you in the land of the living?” I opened my eyes to find everyone in my English class staring at me, my teacher looked particularly unhappy.
“Detention, Miss Little,” he said. “That’s the third time this week you’ve slept during my class.” He turned his attention back to the white-board and resumed talking to the class as I glanced around the room. My best friend gave me a sympathetic smile and my boyfriend winked at me. I sighed and slid down in my chair, I’d had that same dream many, many times before and always just before I started dating a new guy. The first time had been almost two years ago and two weeks later I started dating my first boyfriend. That relationship lasted a month and since then I had dated almost every guy in my grade. Usher Johnson, whom I had been with for three weeks, was my current boyfriend. Anyway, I knew that I had to take drastic measures to make the dream go away once and for all. So, I was grateful when the bell rang and I could escape the last class of my day. I walked quickly through the school and was almost half way down the hill when Usher caught up with me.
“Something wrong?” he asked as he fell into step with me. I slipped my hand into his.
“Just annoyed that I got detention,” I lied. “Mum promised to buy me a present if I made it the whole year without getting into trouble.” Usher squeezed my hand.
“You’ll still come over tonight, won’t you?” he asked. I smiled.
“I wouldn’t miss it for the world,” I said. “I’ll be over at six thirty.” Usher pulled his hand out of mine as we reached the corner where we split up.
“My parents are leaving at six,” he said. “We’ll have the house to ourselves until nine.”
“I’ll see you then,” I said and kissed him before heading in the opposite direction. Usher and I lived on opposite sides of town but we always walked part of the way home together.
It took me fifteen minutes to walk home and when I arrived I went straight to the kitchen where I poured myself a glass of orange juice. I was about to take a sip when I heard a knock on the front door. Jessy Picket, my best friend, was already talking as I opened the front door.
“So, thanks for waiting for me,” she said sarcastically as she walked into the house. “It’s nice to know that your boyfriend is more important than your best friend. Do you have any more juice?” She asked when we reached the kitchen.
“Jessy, I have to tell you something,” I said as I poured her a glass. Jessy glanced up.
“Should I be sitting down for this?” she asked. I shrugged and Jessy carried her juice over to the table. I took a deep breath once she was sitting.
“Usher and I decided,” I said. “Tonight’s the night.” I didn’t have to say anything else; Jessy knew exactly what I was talking about. And she immediately looked at me like I had sprouted two heads.
“Are you freaking crazy?” she asked.
“Well that was not the reaction I was hoping for?” I said. “Something like ‘Congrats, Aster, I’m glad this guy makes you that happy’ would have been fine.”
“You’ve been with the guy for three weeks,” Jessy cried. “You’re going to sleep with him after three weeks? Why?”
“I think we’re ready,” I said. “What difference does the amount of time make?”
“Do you love him?” Jessy asked. I turned away. Trust Jessy to ask the one question I couldn’t answer.
“There are things I love about him,” I said, stealing a line from my favourite movie. Jessy narrowed her eyes at me.
“You’re making a big mistake, Aster,” she said, “You’re going to regret this.”
“How would you know, Jessy?” I said. “When was the last time you had a boyfriend? Oh, that’s right. Never.” I instantly regretted my words. I knew Jessy was just trying to help.
“Jess,” I said but she refused to look at me.
“Do you what you want,” she muttered. “I don’t really give a crap.” She put her glass in the sink before leaving the kitchen. I flinched as I heard the front door slam a minute later. I was tempted to kick myself, I was angry because. I knew that Jessy was sensitive about the subject of boyfriends and I’d been completely insensitive. I sighed and headed upstairs, it was quarter to four and I had a lot to do to prepare for the night ahead.
Two hours later I stood in Usher’s kitchen.
“I tried to cook something for you, but it was sort of a disaster.” Usher said as he pointed to a frying pan with bits of black stuff stuck to the sides of the pan. I grinned.
“It’s the thought that counts,” I said. “Shall we order pizza?” Usher’s house was just around the corner from a pizza bar so it didn’t take him long to return with our pizza…
“At least the pizza’s good,” Usher said as he started on his second slice.
“Next time,” I said. “Have you had enough?” he asked as I swallowed the last bite of my third slice. I grabbed a napkin and wiped my mouth before replying.
“I couldn’t eat another bite,” I said honestly. Usher smiled as he moved closer to me.
“That’s good,” he said. “Because there’s no dessert.” His hands crept up my arms and over my shoulders to cup my face.
“Darn, I was looking forward to seeing what you had made,” I said. Usher grinned.
“Maybe next time,” he said before gently pressing his lips against mine. We kissed for several minutes before Usher moved back and pulled me to my feet. He led me upstairs and into his bedroom where we started kissing again. Usher slowly slid his hands down my ribs and over my stomach to the hem of my shirt, he pulled my shirt up and we broke the kiss only long enough for him to slip it over my head. He dropped the shirt on the ground and pulled me into his arms before we fell sideways onto his bed. He pulled back to look me in the eyes.
“I love you,” he said. My heart missed a beat as I realised that he was telling the truth. I could tell that Usher wanted me to say that I loved him back but I couldn’t bring myself to say those words with meaning. Instead, I kissed him and slipped my hand into his shirt. Usher sighed and rolled us over until he was on top before kissing me again.
I was sitting in front of the TV with a bowl of ice cream when Jessy walked in. “I??
?ve been calling and texting you all morning,” she announced as she walked into the lounge I glanced up at her for a second before turning my attention back to the TV.
“I’ve been busy,” I said tonelessly. “What happened,” she said, concern coating her voice. I looked at her and suddenly tears were streaming down my face.
“How can you be so nice to me after what I said to you yesterday?” Jessy wrapped her arm around me and pulled my head into her chest.
“Cause I… you’re my best friend,” Jessy said. “You’ve been my best friend since we were two and I’m not just going to throw away the fourteen years of friendship we’ve had.”
“You’re the best friend a girl could ask for,” I said as I wiped my eyes and reached for a tissue. I blew my nose before leaning back against the lounge and hugging a pillow. Jessy studied me for a minute and I suddenly felt self conscious.
“What happened?” she asked for the second time. “The last time I saw you like this, Matt Butler had just dumped you. Did Usher hurt you?” The concern in her voice almost made me start crying again.
“No,” I said. “Usher was perfect. That’s the problem. He was gentle and sweet and I felt absolutely nothing.” An odd look crept over Jessy’s face as she asked me the next question.
“What do you mean?” she asked. I hugged the pillow closer before answering.
“Usher was touching me in the right places and everything but I felt nothing,” I said. “It was like I was just going through