Chapter 2
"Here's this month's list," Eugene's stepmom, Stacy, said as she slapped the dreaded piece of paper and a fifty-dollar bill into his outstretched palm.
"If there's any extra, can I buy …"
"Absolutely not, Eugene. Your father won't get paid until Friday. We'll be lucky to make the house payment this month."
"Here's an idea, Mom. Why don't you skip on this list of gunk for the month? Better yet, if you cut out half of this stuff, we could probably save enough over a year to build a swimming pool out back. Heck, I'm certain we'd still have money left over to get Haggy's back waxed," Eugene said with a chuckle while darting, Matrix-like, under and away from his stepmom's backhand.
"You rotten snot," she spat. "Don't tease me about my hygiene and your sister's …"
"Bushiness?" Eugene said while sidestepping another backhand.
Eugene's stepmother yanked open a kitchen drawer, the one containing mixing spoons, tongs, and the like. This meant only one thing. If Eugene didn't get out of the house quickly, his hide was in for a tanning.
"See you soon, Mom! Love ya!" Eugene hollered as he raced out the front door.
"Always cracking jokes about Agatha and me being stinky werewolves or Sasquatches. I'm sick of his mouth," Stacy grumbled as she tossed the massive wooden spoon. It crashed into the other utensils in the drawer. She slammed the drawer shut, and then clicked on the small TV in the kitchen.
"Can't believe it's almost suppertime," she sighed. After rummaging through the refrigerator, Stacy grabbed a couple of jars and a loaf of bread from the pantry. "Looks like another night of PBJs," she grunted. She glanced at the wall clock and wiped the sweat off her cheeks. "Nathan will be calling any minute. Better get Agatha to take her Daddy his dinner tonight. That good-for-nothing Eugene won't make it home before Nathan's dinner break." Stacy bellowed, "Agatha, get in the kitchen and help me with putting your Daddy's dinner together."
Muffled by distance, Agatha hollered her reply. Satisfied, Stacy took it as a yes, and with a grump and a nod, went on with slathering peanut butter onto a stale piece of bread.
Eugene was glad to be out of the house, even though it meant another emasculating trip to the pharmacy. "At least I got away from Agatha before she had another one of her fits," he sighed in relief.
He and Agatha despised each other. They were both products of prior marriages. Three years ago, Stacy and Nathan's marriage resulted in the collision of Eugene and Agatha's distinctly polar personalities.
Nathan admitted to marrying Stacy to keep the Department of Children's Services at bay. Tired of arrogant and demeaning social workers yanking Eugene away and in to foster care, Nathan made certain Stacy and his courtship lasted but one month. Eugene appreciated what his father did to keep the two of them together, but he questioned the cost. Although he referred to Stacy as Mom, he never felt she was much of a mother.
According to Stacy, her ex-husband abandoned Agatha and her the day Agatha was born. Eugene couldn't fault the guy for his decision. During her earlier years, Stacy probably was attractive. Agatha bypassed any vestiges of beauty and inherited the full set of her mother's detractions. As a result, the beastly pair frequented Eugene's nightmares.
Another curious outcome of Nathan and Stacy's marriage occurred when Nathan demanded that Stacy and Agatha sync together their monthly cycles. Then, with the coming of each full moon, he and Eugene would disappear. Although Stacy despised Nathan for his choice of working longer hours during her two weeks of need, she begrudgingly kept her mouth shut because the family desperately needed the extra money he earned.
Eugene hated moving around between the city's cheap motels, but staying in them two weeks every month was better than the alternative. Being around Stacy and Agatha when they were at their most ferocious wasn't even a consideration for Nathan and Eugene.
The trip to the pharmacy was always the first indication of the coming storm. The next day, Eugene would pack his and his father's belongings while Stacy and Nathan were at work and while Agatha was off doing things that Agathas do. Eugene didn't care for their lifestyle, but he admitted it was better than bouncing around between foster homes.
Perks included hanging out more with his father, eating whatever he wanted, watching TV and playing video games, and, best of all, staying far away from his stepmother and stepsister.
Although Agatha never stopped her witchieness, Stacy was sweet and calm at the end of each cycle. She and Nathan always disappeared into their bedroom immediately after dinner and remained in there until breakfast. Once Nathan departed for work, Stacy would dutifully empty Nathan and Eugene's suitcases and wash all their clothes. This was the point in the cycle when Eugene enjoyed being around his stepmom, not because she behaved like a housewife, but because she'd hug him and listen to what he had to say.
That endearing time wasn't now. As Eugene trudged through the slushy snow, he reviewed the list of supplies he needed to buy for his and his Dad's upcoming departure. His Mom's list was relatively easy, so it was committed to memory. The other list was slightly complex. Each month, he had to buy a different scent of air freshener. Switching up fragrances prevented Stacy and Agatha from being able to follow and find them.
Eugene nervously spun the silver serpentine chain around his neck while reading his father's list. "I'm not sure they'll have all this stuff, Dad," he grumbled.
"Who are you talking to, Guh-EEK?" shouted Billy McGuire as he clobbered Eugene with a snowball.
Standing up and wiping the sludge off his tattered overcoat and boots, Eugene politely hollered, "No one in particular, Billy. Just praying for deliverance." While Billy stared blankly, trying to figure out the meaning behind Eugene's comment, Eugene scrambled away, finding effective cover behind a long hedgerow. "Tossing big words at Billy is like dropping a handful of rice in front of a vampire," he chuckled.