This bums me out for two reasons. Mostly because I've come to love those little rug rats and I probably end up spending more time with them when I come over than I do with Max and Jules. But also because I thought they might be a bit of a buffer between Stephanie and me, because I find everything to be very awkward at this point.
I suppose there's a reason we have one-night stands. You engage in the most intimate activity imaginable with a near stranger and then you go your separate ways. It doesn't get any more awkward than impregnating that stranger.
Lunch with Stephanie earlier this week did nothing to enlighten me about who she is. While I still pretty much trust her when she says the baby is mine, I find her to be a little elusive, which is a glaring difference since I tend to be an open book. It's so weird, though. Her outgoing personality is what attracted me to her after I got dazzled by her beauty. She's funny, charming, sexy, and confident, all things that get my dick hard. She knew just what to say and when to say it, and is the type of person who would be the center of attention at any social gathering. A sexually liberated creature, she knew how to fuck like there was no tomorrow, and her dirty mouth rivals mine.
But at lunch she couldn't have been more evasive about her life. I finally gave up and yielded to the million questions she asked me, from what it was like being raised in French Canada to playing in the NHL to my home life growing up. She has an insatiable curiosity and you can tell she's a listener. She likes to hear what people have to say.
But she's not a big talker. The most I got out of her was that her parents became very wealthy in the tech industry and were workaholics, however they did like to travel quite a bit. I learned that she's originally from Northern California--which explains her parents being in the tech industry--and that she came east to go to NC State University for its zoology program, then after she got her bachelor's, she did a master's in geology. Past that, I have no clue why she even likes zoology or geology or how she got to the point she wanted to work in a museum. Like I said, she controlled most of the conversation by asking me questions and listening with intense interest in me. Many would find that type of attention super flattering, but I would have liked to know more about her since we're going to be in each other's lives now.
At the end of lunch, we made tentative plans for me to accompany Stephanie for her first prenatal appointment, which is three weeks away. She'll be eight weeks pregnant by then.
Jules is the one who came up with the idea for this cookout today. If Stephanie and I are going to raise a child together, that means she will be around my family to a certain extent. Thus, it was a pretty good idea to invite Stephanie over in a low-pressure atmosphere to have some food and relaxing conversation to further get to know each other. And I need low pressure right now, as I'm completely rattled by Stephanie in about a million different ways, not least of which is the fact I'm still insanely attracted to her and I'm wondering how to tamp down those feelings.
Ordinarily I'm never unsure about women, but Stephanie is not ordinary in any way. She was the best fuck of my life, and now she's a pregnant woman I'm trying to get to know. And I don't want her to be pregnant. I want her to be a great fuck again, because I still want her, and yet this whole broken-condom-pregnancy thing has put a very weird spin on things. I'm hoping at the very least that at the end of tonight, I'll have a better grasp on how we're going to move forward with this pregnancy.
The doorbell rings and I practically jump out of my skin. Jules snickers and I flip her off.
"I'll get it," I grumble, and head back to the formal living room before turning right to the front door foyer. Max and Jules have a double front door that's mostly glass in a wood frame. It provides me a stunning and clear look at Stephanie as she stands there clutching with both hands the purse strap that's over her shoulder. The late-afternoon sun causes her crimson hair to practically glow, and it's a good thing she's wearing sunglasses because I would be equally hypnotized by her blue eyes as I am by her curls.
She gives me a tentative smile through the glass as I open the door and invite her in. "I'm glad you could make it."
Stephanie steps into the foyer and I get a whiff of her perfume, which has an exotic and spicy bite to it. It totally suits her. She takes off her sunglasses and shoves them into her purse.
"Thanks again for inviting me," she says softly, and I can tell by the tone of her voice that she's as nervous as I am.
For some reason, this gives me a massive boost of confidence and I reach down impetuously to take her hand. Squeezing it, I assure her, "None of us bite. Well, I actually do, but only in the heat of passion."
I immediately want to snatch those words back, as I didn't mean to make a sexual innuendo. I don't want to make this any more uncomfortable than it already is, particularly since we had wild, pulse-pounding, uninhibited sex that goes beyond the norms of what strangers do with each other.
Thankfully, Stephanie just chuckles and squeezes my hand back. Once again, we're holding hands and not letting go. "I appreciate your efforts to put me at ease. Nothing like a sex joke to do that."
She's not only not offended, but she seems to be amused, and this is the lightest her voice has sounded since I found out she was pregnant.
I don't want to lose that and I scramble to maintain it.
"Well, sex makes everything better, right?" I ask in a low voice with a devilish grin.
"Totally right," she agrees with a laugh.
It's then that the slight coughing noise behind us gets our attention, and our hands pull apart involuntarily. I turn and see Jules standing there with a welcoming smile on her face.
She steps forward and puts her hand out to Stephanie. "Hey, Stephanie. I'm Jules and I'm so glad you accepted our invitation."
The women shake hands and I can tell by her posture that Stephanie is back on guard again. Still, she smiles at Jules and says, "It was really nice of you to invite me. And I think Luc has the right idea...that we need to establish some sort of friendship if we're going to go through this together."
Jules releases the handshake, choosing instead to loop her arm through Stephanie's. She pulls her past me toward the kitchen, chattering to her like they were old lost friends.
"Lucas tells me you're from Northern California," Jules says as I follow them. Once they get to the kitchen, Jules motions to one of the stools that sit at the center island and Stephanie takes a seat. I merely lean up against the entryway, fold my arms across my chest, and listen. "Max and I are thinking about touring some wineries there in the summer."
Stephanie's face brightens, and then she enthusiastically launches into some of the wineries that Max and Jules needs to try. In this moment, I see the same woman that flirted with me that night at the gala. In this brief moment, she's not weighed down about the pregnancy or how her life has so dramatically changed against her will. So very different from the closed-off Stephanie I got at lunch. I don't think it's necessarily me who closes her off, and I get the distinct impression that the consequences of what we did are weighing heavier on her than they are on me.
In this moment, I tell myself I'm going to figure out why that is.
--
I have to give it to Max and Jules. Tonight was a perfect and relaxing evening. We eventually moved out onto the deck, and because it was a little chilly, Max turned on some outdoor space heaters. He then managed to grill some superb barbecue ribs and we ate that along with Jules's southern potato salad and baked beans. The strawberry cake was served a little bit later as we sat around the outdoor table and chatted.
Max and I let Jules lead. She had established a quick and easy rapport with Stephanie, and because it was working so well, I let her run with it. It was nice to sit back and just listen and learn.
Jules didn't necessarily get any deeper or personal information about Stephanie's family than I was able to get, but her life since she became an adult has been interesting. She left home at eighteen and came to NC State in Raleigh, North Carolina, on a full-r
ide academic scholarship. She did mention that this was done against her parents' wishes, and when Jules asked her about that, she managed to keep it vague with a simple, "They didn't approve of my choice of careers."
That of course launched into a very long discussion about how Stephanie ended up where she did. Turns out she never had a burning desire to be a curator or a director at a museum, but she took the job because there's not a whole hell of a lot you can do with a zoology bachelor's and a geology master's.
"Then why did you bother with pursuing those degrees?" I had asked her.
She just shrugged and said, "I like rocks and minerals. What can I say?"
I laughed along with everyone else, but I didn't believe what she said. I can tell that Stephanie doesn't have a passion for either zoology, geology or the museum that she works at. It seems to me that more than anything, it was a means to an end. I know this about her, and I can make the comparison, because when she talks about something she's extremely passionate about she's a different person.
I observed the differences when Jules found out that Stephanie likes to work with the elderly, a subject that came about naturally since Jules works part time at a nursing home. I don't know why that revelation stunned me, but it did. Steph apparently donates her time to a nonprofit that delivers meals to housebound geriatrics, and she also volunteers at some of the local nursing homes by visiting patients who don't have family members. This, of course, was right up Jules's alley, so the ladies had plenty to talk about. At that point, Max and I were almost completely cut out of the conversation so we talked about the play-offs that were coming up.
And now the evening has wound down and I'm walking Stephanie out to her car. I'm not going to be leaving just yet as I want to get Max's and Jules's impression of her, but I thought it was the polite thing to do.
There's certainly no other purpose, like perhaps seeing if she's any different with me when we're alone and after spending a few relaxed hours together.
Pulling her keys from her purse, Stephanie turns to me with a laid-back smile. "Thanks for a great evening. I had a lot of fun."
"Then I'm glad," I tell her as I open her car door for her.
"I'm also glad we didn't talk about the pregnancy tonight," she says softly, her eyes lowering to the ground.
"There's plenty of time to talk about that," I assure her. "Just wanted you to meet some of my family since they'll be going through this with me."
Stephanie's gaze comes back up to mine and this time there's a sparkle of mischief. "You don't plan on having them in the delivery room, do you?"
I bark out a laugh as I toss my head back. When I look at her again, I'm shaking my head. "Trust me...I'm the only one in this family who will be looking at your--"
My words abruptly cut off as I realize the dual mistake I made. Bringing up sex and implying that I was going to get it again from her. Once again, my foot gets shoved into my mouth.
A sheepish smile takes my mouth hostage. Stephanie cocks an eyebrow at me, but the smirk on her face tells me she's amused.
"I'm sorry," I say hastily. "I don't know why I keep talking about sex with you. I mean...not that I don't like sex, because I do. Actually, I love it."
Stephanie tilts her head to the side and says, "And why is it that we shouldn't talk about the sex we had? I mean, it was phenomenal."
"Yes, it was," I agree with her.
Best. Sex. Ever.
"Look," she says as she lays a hand on my forearm. "This is new territory for both of us. I get that it's awkward, but we need to move past that. Otherwise we're going to be in for a miserable time over the next several months."
"I agree," I say readily.
"We should have sex again," she says at the same time.
"What?" I exclaim even as my groin tightens at the thought. I'd be lying if I didn't admit to fantasizing about that night a time or twenty. But I wasn't prepared for the possibility that that could happen again, because it just seemed selfish to say, "Hey...sorry I knocked you up, but I'd really like to fuck you again."
"Well, why not?" Stephanie says simply as her hand falls away. "You and I are both healthy adults, I certainly can't get any more pregnant, and we clearly had amazing chemistry. I'm single. You're single--or at least I assume you are--and we both enjoy sex."
Well, fuck...when you say it like that, why the hell aren't we having sex right this very minute?
Instead I try to throw some logic out, but I really hope she shoots it down. "It could complicate things."
"Not if we agree it would be casual," she says, and I like the way this woman thinks.
There are a million reasons why this would be a bad idea. I know nothing about Stephanie, and yet I have no choice but to try to forge an alliance with her so we can successfully parent our child. Sex would complicate everything, because sex is about emotion, it's about feeling and opening up. Much of that may be physical, but physical can lead to the nonphysical. How much are we going to both be at risk for confused or hurt feelings when that happens and then doesn't work out? Because Stephanie doesn't seem like a relationship type of girl, and I definitely don't want to be in a committed relationship. I like being single way too much.
"But if you don't think that's possible," she says quickly, "I'm cool with that as well."
"Now wait a minute," I say as a hold my palms up to her and ignore logic and reason. "Let's not be that hasty. This could have some merit."
Stephanie's eyes start to sparkle again as she grins at me. "You know, I've been researching pregnancy, and apparently my hormones are going to be a little wacky. I've heard a very unfortunate side effect is that I will be extremely horny."
I bust out with a forceful, elated laugh that she can bring humor to the situation. It definitely helps to put me more at ease, and also makes my dick harder because she's taking away every reason I could have to keep her at arm's length.
Stepping in close to her, I peer down so I can confirm the truth in her eyes. "Are you sure you want to do this?"
"I don't see any downside," she says breathlessly, although we both know that's just not true. But if she thinks we can have a casual relationship based on sex and it won't interfere with the new relationship we're trying to establish, then I think I need to take advantage of that.
Even though I know this could be a colossal mistake, I dip my face down to hers until our mouths are almost touching. "Did I happen to mention that my house is less than five miles from here?"
Stephanie practically purrs at the suggestion, and now I'm fully hard. "Then let's go."
Chapter 4
Stephanie
I wonder if Luc thinks I'm a complete skank because I'm into sex with him. Perhaps I shouldn't have come on so strong, but it's hard to regret doing so when what we're about to do is going to be amazing. The way I grew up ensured I'd be rebellious at some point, and rebellion at a young age often included sex when you weren't supposed to be having it. I learned early that it not only feels good but it can give you things you can't get elsewhere. It can give you emotional connection without having to sacrifice yourself for it--a brief, glorious connection when both of you are united in passion.
For someone who craved to just be noticed for so long and never got it, sex filled a big void for me. And the best thing about casual sex was that I could walk away if I wanted, because I found that I really wasn't prepared for something more than a brief fling Anything else was too overwhelming. So casual was the name of the game for me, and if feelings grew on the other side, and he wanted something deeper outside of the bedroom, well...that wasn't something I could quite let myself open up to.
I wonder if I should explain this to Luc, but then I chastise myself for even wondering. It's none of his business why I am the way I am, and I refuse to care if he looks down on me because I enjoy casual sex. He's the one who invited me into his home tonight.
And it's nothing like I imagined a professional hockey player would live in.
It's actually
quite small, although it's very pretty. Illuminated by well-placed exterior lighting, the house has dark gray siding with white trim and black shutters. It sits on a small hill that takes up the corner of a block of similar-looking homes. The landscaping I can see in the glow of the lights looks professionally done, as the grass is pristine and there are a variety of bushes and plants that you can tell were all carefully placed so that it looks artful.
I'd followed Luc here in my car and parked behind him on the street. When I get out of my car, he's waiting for me with a hungry expression as he takes my hand. We walk up the sloped driveway that intersects with a concrete path that leads to the porch and I tell him, "Your house is lovely."
"It's cute, but it's not mine," he says as he trots up the porch steps and opens a screen door. "I decided to rent for six months when I moved here so I could get a better lay of the land before I decided to buy. One of my teammates, Van Turner, is rooming with me. He's also new to the team."
Luc opens the front door and then steps back, motioning me in before him. The house is older and the living room is tiny. It's totally a bachelor pad, though, as there's nothing but a couch and a large-screen TV with various components on the opposite wall. The kitchen attaches, separated by a small island with a window that looks out over the backyard. To my right is a short hall with what looks like a room on either side and perhaps a bathroom.
My breath hitches when Luc comes to stand behind me, slipping my purse off my shoulder and lowering it to the floor. My nipples tighten when he pulls my hair away from my neck and gives me a feathery kiss there.
"I'm not even sure what to do with you," he murmurs as he brings his other hand to my breast. He cups it gently and squeezes, and holy hell that feels good.
Stepping back, I press my ass into him, letting my head fall to rest below his shoulder, which pushes my breast into his hand. "If you can't come up with anything unique right now, I'm cool with a repeat of our first time."
Luc gives a low, rumbling laugh that reverberates through me, and I can't help the smile that comes to my face. Perhaps for my temerity or perhaps he's just testing, but he pinches my nipple through the layers of my sweater and bra, and he's not nice about it. I buck and moan at the same time, the pain from that pinch shooting straight down between my legs where that familiar and much-wanted heat and wetness start to bloom.