***
Sariel pointed out the fixed sentry points, but in the daylight, guards patrolled nearly every inch of the launch site anyway. He thought it best to wait for nightfall so they could bypass the security perimeter by flying over the walls and onto the buildings without being seen. The three demons waited for the sun to dip below the horizon before launching themselves onto the heavily guarded buildings.
Once inside, Sariel directed Lucifer to the showers and locker room inside Cape Canaveral in search of uniforms to help them blend in under the lights of the hallways. The scientists and staff were busy with the launch preparation for the next day and for the most part ignored the three demons, despite Azazel’s condition.
“He ate something awful in the cafeteria,” Sariel said, pointing at the limp demon draped over Lucifer’s shoulder and bleeding down his back. “Don’t try the shellfish. It’s like something out of Alien.”
“Jesus!” a bespectacled, blonde woman covered her mouth and hurried down the hallway.
“She could have been next,” Sariel smiled to his brother.
“You should have asked if she had an unusual number of nipples.”
“Yeah, hindsight.”
“Yeah,” Lucifer laughed.
A guard approached and pointed toward Azazel. “What’s wrong with him?”
“Thank God, you’re here,” Lucifer said, motioning the guard toward a closet door. “He went in there.”
The guard eyed the trail of blood down the other hallway suspiciously but unholstered his sidearm and led the demons to the closet. He opened the door, turned the light on, and barged into the room. “There’s no one in here.”
Lucifer waved to his brother after checking the halls. As the door shut, Sariel flipped the light switch and released a focused pattern-magic push that incapacitated the guard, knocking him out cold. The wizard assassin quickly changed into the guard’s tight uniform and tucked his shoulder length hair into the human’s blue cap.
“You look ridiculous,” Lucifer said upon seeing him.
“Well, you look like you just left the set of a horror movie,” Sariel replied.
They rounded a corner and found two more guards beside the shower entrance. The guards were the only ones in the hallway.
“What’s wrong with him?”
“We caught him sodomizing a flock of geese,” Sariel said.
“What?”
He released another push that leveled the two guards as the magical wave traveled through them.
Lucifer shook his head. “What is wrong with you?”
“Can you imagine the interrogation those two guys are going to have tomorrow?”
Sariel smiled, completely proud of himself.
Lucifer pulled the door handle, and Sariel followed him through the doorway. There were voices inside, and it was so humid and hot that it felt more like a sauna than a shower. Sariel pointed toward the lockers, and Lucifer pushed onward. They opened several of the metal doors before finding an orange jumpsuit.
“With all these comets hitting Mars, Jupiter, and Venus, this might be our last mission of the year,” a man’s voice said as his footsteps approached.
“Yeah, I heard Hank talking about increased solar activity too. Something’s going on … Hey … Who are you guys?”
“I’m Captain Donnelly,” Lucifer said, “and I’m looking for my uniform.”
“Well, you’re in my locker,” the man said. “See the name? Stanley Smith.”
“What’s wrong with him?” the other man asked, nodding at Azazel.
Lucifer looked at Sariel who blinked and bit his lip.
“We caught him molesting a school of jelly fish,” Lucifer said.
“He wouldn’t stop stroking their poisonous tentacles,” Sariel added.
“What?”
Again, the humans dropped to the ground, and Sariel laughed. He could do this all night.
Lucifer carefully lowered Azazel to the floor and stripped off his own bloody shirt and jeans. Sariel could hear the handle turning and the water pouring down on his brother from the locker room.
“Do me a favor and clean his wounds,” Lucifer called. “And find him a fresh change of clothes—preferably another flight uniform.”
Sariel moved Azazel into the showers and turned on the water to clean out the wound. He removed Azazel’s clothes and looked over the blackened injury to his stomach. “Maybe I should cauterize the wound.”
“Yeah,” Lucifer said.
Sariel placed his hand over the gaping hole and pressed heat into it. He tried to focus the fire so that it wouldn’t spread throughout Azazel’s body cavity. Underneath the trusted bodyguard, Sariel could see the flames licking at the shower tiles, and the stench of burning flesh filtered around the room as Azazel moaned softly.
“Ugh,” Lucifer said. “That smells terrible.”
“You know … our grandmother took shorter showers.”
Lucifer closed the valve and turned around. Sariel smiled as his brother gave him the stink-eye. Sariel continued to wash Azazel before pulling him along the tiles back toward the lockers.
“Seriously?” Lucifer asked. “You’re such a jerk.”
“If I get the uniform wet, I’ll look like an idiot,” Sariel said.
“You could just incapacitate the whole building,” Lucifer said. “You don’t even need a uniform. I need one so no one raises an alarm while I’m hauling Azazel to the shuttle.”
“Listen, Luke. I was trained as an assassin. Subterfuge is part of the fun. Do I tell you to go around not killing people on a battlefield?”
“I took a poll of the people in the room, and nobody likes you.”
“Eh, he’s all right,” Azazel mumbled.
Lucifer came back into the room and grabbed Azazel by the shoulders. “Good to have you back.”
“I feel like a roasted duck.”
“You sort of smell like one too.” Lucifer said, smiling at his old friend. “Can you walk?”
“With a little help.”
Lucifer grabbed his hand and pulled him up.
“You two love birds finish getting dressed,” Sariel told them. “I have a date with the control tower.”
“Tell her … that I said hi,” Azazel called after him.
Sariel pushed the door outward and turned down the hallway. He slowed down as he came to a large window looking into a room with hundreds of computer terminals and dozens of busy scientists and administrators. The far wall was glass from floor to ceiling, allowing the occupants to look out onto a launch pad, two fully-fueled solid rocket boosters and a space shuttle.
“Clearance?” a guard beside the door to the control room asked.
“Just a hair under six feet.”
“What?”
Another whooshing sound and another thud. “I’m going to miss this.”
Sariel used the security guard’s clearance card to open the door and walked in. He trailed a hand along the desks as he approached the window overlooking the shuttle. The bespectacled blonde female scientist from earlier passed in front of him. He winked at her as she gave him a surprised, confused look.
“Security isn’t supposed to be in here.”
He smiled as he looked around at all the working staff. Time for them to sleep.
“How many nipples do you have?”
“What?”