Chapter 17
Discipline
“Cleverness is over the meticulous law. And heart over any cleverness,”
– Simard Polchinski
After the occasions Evan had with Tasha, he never really messed around with her anymore. He was too embarrassed to tell his gangs what happened.
“Nah, we are too cool for them,” he merely said.
Diana was trying to teach the children, about poems and prose, but children weren’t very excited. So she merely asked them to write how to avoid the certain situation like those happened in orphanage. She thought maybe it will help her understand them better.
Jake said he have to do the guard duty the day after tomorrow. Tasha said she’s going to teach Jake how to shoot the target so they went into the woods. Tasha hopped around Jake.
“Do you mind washing your face?... NOOO!” Jake screamed as Tasha wiped her face on his clothes. Jake tried to take her off but she end up blowing her nose on his clothes.
“No, I don’t mind,” grinned Tasha, playfully. “Urgh today was a shitty day. I had to endure some nutty woman who was upset about me existing.”
“No, they are saying because you carried guns. And you aren’t really polite to people,” said Jake.
“Hey hey, you have to be on my side,” said Tasha, twitching her lips. “Stay here.”
Jake stopped. She went further down to the woods and picked few pebbles and put it on the rock. Tasha ran back to Jake, grinning, and hand Jake her pistol.
“When going for a long shot, aim a little lower,” said Tasha.
“Do you think Alvin will be waiting for us in the spot?” said Jake, looking at the pistol.
“Of course he will,” said Tasha.
“You know he is back with former friends and all, why would he care about us?” said Jake, aiming at the target. “You do know that Alvin and Diana were married just to avoid Veron’s eye. You know, it’s not really a marriage.”
Tasha didn’t respond; her face became rigid. Jake shot the target; he missed. Jake sighed and lowered the pistol.
“So, when the cause is gone, there is nothing to…” said Jake raising his gun. And Tasha walked right in front of him. Jake startled.
“Woooa, I almost shot you!” blabbered Jake, almost jumped at her action.
“Will you stop whining?” said Tasha. “You don’t know shit about Alvin, because all you think about is yourself, do you? You selfish bastard.”
“…” Jake stayed silenced.
“Alvin went back for Polchinski for a sense of duty, why would he go back there in the first place huh?” shouted Tasha.
“Yeah, it was close to suicide,” murmured Jake. “I mean, yeah, he was crazy enough to march there, fighting against the formidable regime?”
“You, you know what? You haven’t changed a bit since you came out from the orphanage,” muttered Tasha, blushing. “I mean why would you? Because you don’t have reason to? Yes, you can make a game out of others’ life, that’s a fucking talent you got. Now Jake Caravel, try to play now. Can you save anyone? Then save Alvin for me.”
Jake silently watched Tasha; he flinched a little when she called him Jake Caravel, which she never addressed him in that way before. But Jake had enough of Tasha bossing him around; he doesn’t want to be treated like a kid anymore.
“Yes, you are noble and brave. You rescued me from time to time! I get it! You are just some crackup head! What do you expect me to do, huh? You are being bad to Diana, she misses him too! What about you? You are living inside your ego, acting like some tragic hero! You narcissistic cunt,” exploded Jake.
“What did you call me?” said Tasha, angrily, raising her eyebrows.
“I said you are a cunt,” said Jake, throwing the pistol a far, pushing her. “Are you mad? Cunt?”
Tasha stumbled but did not fell. She was mad, lowering her stance, was ready to attack.
“Go on, do you think I can’t handle one little girl?” sneered Jake.
“Well said,” said Tasha. She grabbed the rock from the ground and ran toward him and they started fighting.
In the tent, Diana was looking at what Jake and Tasha’s wrote. Nancy was making a blanket out of the deer skin they caught.
“How is it?” said Nancy, kindly.
“It is a piece of work,” said Diana, narrowing her eyes, on the paper. “More of a cryptology,” she added, looking at the hardly recognizable handwriting.
“What did they wrote about?” asked Nancy.
“Well, I guess it is mostly about the thing Alvin taught them. And their dark experience at the orphanage… Rage and despair…” said Diana.
“Those poor children,” said Nancy. Later in the afternoon, Gilbert dropped by and gave the chunk of boar meat they brought. Nancy took out the berries from the basket and put it on the plate.
“Thank God for the food,” said Diana, looking at meats and fruits. “Where are those kids, anyway?”
But as soon as Diana took her jacket, Tasha and Jake walked in. Diana glimpsed at them, their face was bloated. Jake had a nasty cut and bruises on his face. Nancy gasped, dropped the folk but Diana wasn’t surprised at all.
“Dinner’s ready,” said Diana. “Let’s say a prayer.”
The children looked at Diana and sat at the table quietly. Diana didn’t mention a word about their wounds throughout whole evening. Diana talked about other topic; she didn’t bring up the topic about Alvin either.
At that time, Alvin was laying down on the grass looking up at the sky. Stein was sitting next to him. Stein got injured on a shoulder, medic wrapped around the bandage around his arm.
“Aren’t you too old for this shit?” murmured Alvin.
“Maybe,” said Stein.
“I have a question,” said Alvin.
“Go on,” said Stein, grunting.
“… Why did you let go of the admiral position? Well, Nina, you know, was unstable at the time,” said Alvin. “I’m not saying she is stable now but… you know she was worse before.”
“The better question is, why did I put you in our army in the first place,” chuckled Stein. Alvin laughed.
“Those days,” chuckled Alvin, “were so full of shit.”
“Yep, I’m having the best time in my life right now,” said Stein. “Who knows? We also might have a chance to live.”
The wind breezed toward them. The soldiers were walking around, chatting casually, looking at the sunset.
“Live…” Alvin closed his eyes and smiled.
“I was with Simard for a long time. He was only man I could trust,” said Stein.
“Uh huh,” said Alvin, looking at Stein.
“It was my duty,” said Stein. “I don’t regret making her the admiral.”
Stein remembered the first time he entered Simard’s army when he was just a rookie. He was a young, passionate, and idiotic kid. He was fat and pimple faced at the time. The training was harsh, he struggled inside it. Simard worked at the military research department for the adoption of the military technology to his troops. And then, the civil war broke out; they fought against Veron well but they were overwhelmed by the enemy. Eventually he surrendered to Veron.
Simard asked Stein not to call him admiral anymore, he scattered his army and ordered them to hide. Simard were never warm toward Stein but he was always like a father for Stein. He disciplined him and took care of him. During all the years Stein met with Simard, Stein thought he was an asshole. But later he was the one whom he missed the most. This was the reason he decided to put Nina to the power and taught her everything he knew.
When they were all captured, Veron was interested in Alice’s Experiment. He proposed that if Simard choose to work for Veron, he will release the prisoners. Simard accepted the offer.
Stein was captured in the cell and Veron’s officers were pronouncing the execution day to the prisoners; he was just sitting there, accepting it and praying. But few days later, the soldier came and entered the cell. He took hi
m roughly out of the cell and brought him to some government officers. They said to sign the form and he’s free to go.
Stein asked them the reason why. Why are they doing this? They answered, “Your boss is our dog now,” and sniggered.
Later that week, Stein was looking for Simard. He worked in the construction area, lifting stones, struggling to earn his daily bread. He was curious about Simard’s whereabouts, walking on the ruins. Stein made a good friend with the guard working there. He later asked him a favor whether he could give him the address where Simard Polchinski lived. The guard was reluctant but gave him the address anyway as it was no longer a wartime. The address was written in a shred of paper. Stein followed the address one night. He walked and walked under the starry sky and stopped in front of the shabby wooden building. He walked up to it and knocked.
Few moments later, the door opened and he saw Simard with a haggard look. Simard smiled weakly at the sight of Stein.
“Didn’t expect you,” said Simard.
“So, is this the house the dictator gave you to live?” said Stein, his voice was hoarse.
“It’s quite a nice place.” said Simard, chuckling.
“…” said Stein, and they stared at each other for a moment. Simard looked tired, and had a bitter look.
“Come in,” said Simard and they walked inside the room. Simard hit the light and sat on the couch, and gestured Stein to sit. But Stein didn’t bulge. The room was cold, they could see their vapor.
“I had to do it, Stein, otherwise they won’t let you guys go,” muttered Simard.
“Then you shouldn’t have let us go,” said Stein.
“Let them have what they want, it’s not a big deal,” waved Simard. “Too many bloods have been spilled…”
“… I thought you were with me,” said Stein. “I thought I knew what I signed up for.”
“I did what I could,” said Simard. He stood up and went toward the kitchen; he was limping. He opened the refrigerator and took out the water.
“And you just admit your defeat?” said Stein. “And helping Veron for the rest of your life?”
Simard glimpsed at Stein, who was trembling with anger. He gestured to Stein again to sit down, but Stein ignored him. Simard poured the water in the cup and put it on the table. But Stein didn’t move to get it.
“… Stein, why are you here?” said Simard, sighing.
“Duty,” answered Stein. “And you owe me an explanation.”
“… Duty?” said Simard, frowning.
“Didn’t I swear to you, that I’ll fight for you till the end?” said Stein.
“Touching, I say, noble, you risked your life for me.” chuckled Simard. “But let me ask you a question, Stein. Am I really worth it?”
“…” Stein leered at him, stiffened and rigid. Simard grabbed the cup of water and gulped it down.
“It’s a pretty simple question. Do you happen to join my army against your will? I thought since you risked your life, there has to be some compelling reason behind it?” said Simard.
“Don’t fuck with me Simard,” said Stein. “We all want to kill Veron Komer.”
“I don’t deny it, perhaps I’m not the best person to give you this lecture am I?” said Simard, bitterly.
“…”
“But don’t get me wrong, my good friend. I’m not trying to defend myself. But nevertheless, tell me, why are you here with me?” said Simard.
There was a long silence. The air seemed like it froze. They could only hear the sound of the clock ticking.
“… Because I fear God,” said Stein, closing his eyes.
Simard silenced and merely looked on the table. Stein sighed and walked toward the door.
“Time will come, Stein,” muttered Simard, his eyes beamed. Stein went out and didn’t look back.
And that was the last time he saw his face. Simard disappeared with a black smoke and ashes after Veron’s raid. And then, that little Nina Polchinski walked into his life.