Leo shook his head. “I’d rather be celibate than in a vanilla relationship. I was preparing for a life of celibacy anyway before Emilio.” He didn’t voice that perhaps this was his penance. He’d wanted the priesthood to hide and subdue the things inside him that made him feel different. At the same time, he wasn’t going to live vanilla. It would be like Angelo settling down with a woman and having babies.
“I don’t do normal,” he said. “You’re either in it all the way with me, or not at all.”
“Aren’t we in it right now? Is the way you’re holding me in your bed platonic?”
If Caprice had said it, it would have been with an air of sarcasm. He would have wanted to smack the smart look off her face. But Faith was just being honest.
“When my family leaves, you’ll go back to your room in the east wing. I admit it’s dangerous getting this close, but we’ll both get over it and readjust when the holiday is behind us.”
The next thing she said was so quiet, he had to strain to hear it. “W-what if I gave consent?”
His breath stopped and his grip on her tightened. She couldn’t mean that. She didn’t trust that Caprice wasn’t a danger to her. She only wanted to keep him from going to the hotel.
He took a slow breath, not trusting his voice. “If you gave consent for what?”
“T-the things you like.”
“I think you should think about the consequences of that very long and hard. If you give me your consent, you’ll be treated as my slave, and I won’t allow you to take it back. You make that choice and you don’t get any more free choices in this house.” Her body tensed against his. Good. She needed to know she couldn’t tease him with this. He wouldn’t let her play with his emotions by trying to give him something only to take it back every time she became scared of it.
“W-would you be mean to me? I mean… would you be a lot different than you are now? Would I still be safe with you?”
He pressed a kiss to her forehead. “You’ll always be safe with me. I would expect you to obey me at all times. If you disobeyed, you would be punished. The dungeon is both for punishment and for play. I play rough, but I’m not mean.”
“I… um…”
Leo placed a finger against her lips. “Not tonight, Faith. You can tell me your choice after the family leaves. You need more than one day to think about it. Trust me.”
She lay against her pillow, the relief of being spared such a drastic decision for another week palpable. When she was settled in, Leo got up and began to get dressed. Now that he was thinking about it, he’d never get to sleep with a willing slut waiting for him at a hotel.
“Where are you going?”
He gave her a stern look as he put on his belt. If she was contemplating giving herself fully to him, surely she knew that prying into his personal life wouldn’t be acceptable.
“You’re going to see her, aren’t you?”
A tear slid down her cheek, and part of him wanted to punish her for it, though she hadn’t yet signed away her free will. Even without malice and intent, tears could manipulate, and he wouldn’t be controlled by her emotional outbursts, no matter how sincere they might be.
Leo didn’t give her the satisfaction of an answer. Instead he grabbed his wallet and keys off the night table and flicked off the light. “Go to sleep. I’m locking this door behind me. I’ll let myself in when I get back.”
He was a bastard for doing this, but Faith would never consent to his desires. She didn’t have it in her. She was merely bargaining for her life. Caprice was his last chance for a while to get his needs met from someone he wasn’t in danger of developing an emotional attachment to or damaging beyond repair.
Leo went through the kitchen to the wine cellar door, then down below to the den and grabbed his large, black medical bag from the secret compartment behind the bookcase. He unlocked the door to the dungeon to load the bag with the things he would need. Ropes—the scratchier and more unpleasant against the skin, the better—a gag, blindfold, various whipping implements, various clamps, a couple of dildos but no vibrators this time.
He was angry with Caprice, with himself, with Faith, with Angelo, with the whole fucking world. Some of it was nobody’s fault, but for each troubled thought and motivation spiraling through his mind, Leo needed to assign a villain. He didn’t plan on letting Caprice have an orgasm tonight. All he wanted was for her to feel raw and used to appease him.
She was such a masochist that it would be fine with her. Whatever he wanted to do, she just wanted him to touch her. If it weren’t for her personality, she’d be the perfect woman. But Leo couldn’t trust her. He’d always be paranoid about her motivations. Relationships were all one big chess game to her, and he wasn’t going to be a pawn on her board.
Standing outside in the snow, bundled in a black coat, holding a bag filled with torture devices, he felt like Mr. Hyde going to set about the dirty business of feeding the darker impulse so the mild-mannered Jekyll could continue to go about life in peace during the day.
“You know it’s a bad idea.”
Leo jumped at the sound of his brother’s voice, and Angelo stepped around the corner he’d been lurking behind. He dropped his cigarette into the snow and it hissed as the frozen water put it out, sending a spiral of smoke up from the ground.
“Damnit, Ange. I know it’s a bad idea.” He didn’t pretend confusion. They knew each other well enough to dispense with the ritual of denial.
“Isn’t Faith in your room?” Angelo pointed up at the window.
“She is.”
His brother shook his head. “I practically gift wrapped your new toy and you won’t even play with her. It’s enough to give a brother a complex.”
“It’s not right,” Leo said.
“And using Caprice is?”
When Angelo became the moral one, you knew the earth had tilted fully off its axis and only flaming apocalypse could follow.
“There are degrees,” Leo said. “Caprice knows this isn’t going anywhere. She’s not a victim. She’s never been a victim for one day in her life. Faith is different. She’s at my mercy, and that wasn’t her choice. I can’t stand the thought of hurting her.”
“I’m pretty sure this hurts her. I’ve seen the way she looks at you,” Angelo said. “She’s ripe for picking.” He was determined to play matchmaker and see that his gift was put to good use. His new strategy was temptation. Leo was surprised his brother hadn’t followed him and Faith around with mistletoe.
“You know what I mean. I mean damage her. We aren’t in a relationship. We’re two people stuck together by circumstance. That’s all.”
“Keep telling yourself that.”
Angelo pulled out another cigarette and leaned against the building. He flicked the silver lighter, and his face glowed as he took a drag to catch the flame. When he was finished being dramatic, he said, “Maybe you’re afraid to be happy. I never noticed it before, but I think you aren’t satisfied in life unless you feel guilty about something. My brother the saint. Tell me, does the weight of the world ever get heavy?”
“Fuck off.”
Angelo’s laughter followed him through the snow to his car.
Chapter Thirteen
Leo had called five hotels before he’d found one to put Caprice up in. The last thing he’d expected was for The Plaza to have an opening on Christmas day or to have a room available for an entire week block. Sometimes life was funny. He’d set her up in a deluxe courtyard room on the ninth floor. It was the least he could do, isolating her during the holidays as he was. But he didn’t want her around Faith.
He hadn’t bothered calling, and it was coming close to midnight, but Caprice would let him in if she knew what was good for her. He’d caught the floor when he’d made the reservation, but now the room number escaped him. He took a breath and approached the registration desk, trying not to look sinister.
“Could you tell me Caprice Clementi’s room number please?”
“I
’m sorry, sir, but we can’t give out the room numbers of our guests. I could telephone her for you if you’d like?”
Leo looked like he was there to whack her, so he couldn’t blame the hotel staff for their concern. And he did intend to whack her, just not in the way they probably thought. He set down his bag and pulled his wallet out, placing his driver’s license and credit card on the marble. “Leo Raspallo. I paid for the room.”
Panic entered the man’s eyes at the name, then his attention turned to tapping keys at a speed that would impress any secretary. He checked the name on the license and the card number against what was in the computer and cleared his throat. “I apologize, Mr. Raspallo. I didn’t know. She’s in room 912. Would you like a key card?”
“I would.”
Why knock if he was paying for her accommodations? He was here to take what he wanted from her anyway, why pretend with pleasantries and knocks on doors that he wasn’t fully entitled to her body until she got on a plane?
The man scanned the card and slid it across the counter with a weak smile. Leo returned a smile of his own, collected his bag, and got on the elevator.
Inside 912, Leo hung his coat in the entryway. A lush master bathroom was on the left. And then further in, toward the back, was the bedroom. He was surprised when he reached the foot of the bed to find Caprice going at it with a strange man—no doubt an old friend she felt justified in catching up with.
“I’m sorry, Caprice. Did you feel it was appropriate to hook up in a room I’m paying for?”
She scrambled off the man she’d been straddling and struggled to cover herself with the bedsheets. The man looked uncertain.
“Hello,” Leo said, addressing the stranger. “I’m Leo Raspallo. Get out, while I’m feeling generous.”
There were moments having that name came in handy. Though his hands were mostly clean of the family business, Leo never hesitated using his name to make an impression.
The man’s eyes widened. “I-I’m sorry. I-I didn’t know she was yours.”
“Hey!” Caprice snapped. “I’m not furniture.”
“Oh, you are if I say you are.” Leo appraised her like a piece of meat he was considering from the butcher. He turned back to the man who was trying to get to his clothing without flashing everyone in the room. “What’s your name?”
“I… uh… um… John.”
“Mm-hmm,” Leo said, not buying that name for a minute. “Well, John, I think it would be better if you put your clothing on out in the hallway. Don’t you agree?”
“But… I… uh…”
Leo raised an eyebrow. John grabbed his clothes and fled from the room. When Leo was alone with Caprice, he said, “You’re going to have to be punished for being such a rude, naughty slut, of course.”
This would have had Faith huddling in a corner, but Caprice smirked. “Was that scene necessary?”
He shrugged. “I’ve got a lot of pent-up energy.”
“I didn’t know you’d come see me,” she said, pouting.
“Like you said, Faith is never going to be enough.”
She smiled.
“Same rules as before. Starting now, no eye contact, address me as Master, only. Do you understand?”
Caprice looked down at the pattern on the bedspread. A shuddering breath left her when she said, “Yes, Master.”
“Did you manage an orgasm with him?” Leo asked.
“No, Master.”
“I’m not surprised. You won’t be having one with me, either.” His pronouncement excited her more. Perhaps she saw a challenge in it—or a game. She’d find out soon enough he was serious. The only person coming tonight would be him. Or there would be dire consequences.
This time, he took it slow. There were no guests to get back to, and for better or worse, Faith knew where he was. He spent half an hour tying Caprice up. He wanted her immobile and unable to squirm away, while still being accessible and open.
“Ow! These ropes are too tight, and they’re scratching me.”
Leo stepped back to observe his work, ignoring her whining.
“Leo!”
He extracted a collapsible, stainless steel cane from his bag, then with a flick of his wrist, extended it to its full size. He whacked her on the ass, and she let out a squeal.
“What did I say my name was?”
“Master,” she gasped. That tinge of fear was back in her eyes, and remembering herself, she quickly averted her gaze to the floor as the tears started to flow.
Leo went to the minibar and poured himself a drink, then sat in an overstuffed chair, his eyes drinking in his captive.
“Why are you with her?” Caprice asked after a few minutes.
“What kind of question is that? She’s my fiancée.”
“But she’s not like us. I just don’t understand what you see in her. Are you trying to be a martyr? I can give you what you want. If you break off the engagement, I’ll do anything. I swear. We shouldn’t have broken up.”
He downed the rest of his drink and placed the glass on the side table, his eyes narrowing. “You’ll manipulate and connive and cheat and get whatever you want while pretending to be my slave. You’ll play the good girl when I’m watching and do whatever the hell you want when I’m not. I put you up here as my guest, and I walk in to find you screwing another man under the sheets my credit card paid for. We might not be in a relationship, but that’s tacky by anyone’s standards.”
She turned away.
“Well, am I wrong?”
“You want too much,” she said, barely above a whisper.
“Yes, and that was the conclusion we came to the last time we had this conversation when we were breaking up. You gave me an ultimatum, and I told you to leave. The fact that you felt you could give me an ultimatum is 90 percent of the problem. I don’t want to play a game with you!”
“Then why are you here playing one? Is the vanilla suburban wife game going to be any more appealing to you? Missionary position, lights off. Is that better than this? I can’t give you everything, Leo, but I can give you something.”
Two women in his bed in the same night, both promising him half of the whole he craved. It wasn’t enough. From either of them. He rose slowly, alcohol and predation running through his veins and bent to grab the back of her neck.
His face moved in close to hers. He practically growled when he spoke. “I’m not playing into your manipulation again, Caprice. We are not getting back together. If you can’t handle that, I will pack up my things and leave now. I want to hear you say it, say you understand me and you accept the terms of what we’re doing here.”
She glared up at him. “What are we doing here, Leo?”
He released her and picked up the cane again. With one hand, he covered her mouth, and with the other, he raised the implement. A blur of silver sliced through the air and connected with her flesh. She let out a muffled howl against his hand. When she’d composed herself again, he released her.
“You can’t follow the simplest rules. I said while I’m here you will call me Master. If that’s too complicated for you and too much for you to remember, I’ll leave.”
Panic filled her eyes. “No, wait. I’ll be good. I’m sorry, Master. I’ll do what you want. I promise.”
“Say you understand and accept my terms. I have to know that you understand you won’t gain a relationship out of this. If that’s what you think your goal is, lose the delusion.”
“I understand, Master.” Her head dropped to the bed and a single tear slid down her cheek.
Leo had a moment’s hesitation where everything paused and went quiet. Inside the stillness of that moment, he knew the truth. She loved him. Or what passed as love in her world, anyway. She felt for him as much as she was capable of feeling for another human being, and he didn’t return that affection. It was wrong to keep going here, to play with her. No matter what she said, deep down he knew she believed if she pleased him enough, he might keep her and send Faith away. She di
dn’t know how to be honest, and that was a deal breaker for him.
And yet, here she was all tied up, begging him to use her. Faced with a long stretch of celibacy and no outlets for his sadism in sight, Caprice was too much temptation. She was a last meal on death row.
But like before, being here with her was weak satisfaction, like masturbation that results in a bad orgasm, where you go through the motions only to find the resulting pleasure is such a dim shadow as to have been a complete waste of time.
That was how Leo felt standing in the deluxe courtyard room on the ninth floor of The Plaza hotel. Having driven half an hour from his estate to get to the edge of the city and then another forty-five minutes fighting traffic, and here was a willing woman tied down, waiting for him to use her in whatever way appealed to him.
But when he looked at her, in his mind’s eye, he saw Faith there, pushing past her fears to submit. It would mean more because it was a sacrifice for her. As much as Caprice wanted to do anything to be with him, once she had him, her tune would change. Her resolve would melt like snow to reveal the dead grass underneath. Her willingness to do anything would drift away and he’d be left with yet another sham.
Caprice, he would never own. She wasn’t the kind of thing a man could own. Faith, on the other hand, was his. Even with his resistance to hurting her, she belonged to him and would never be able to walk out the door and out of his life. If he wanted to tie her down and whip her, he could do it. He could do any depraved thing to her that his mind could dream up. The only barrier was his conscience. If he didn’t do this with Caprice, if he didn’t take the edge off the hunger, he would end up losing control with Faith. Then he’d be the monster he’d always suspected he was.
Caprice didn’t resist when he took the gag from his bag and pushed the rubber ball into her mouth. The truth was, even being who she was, her words could still touch him. Without them, she was a mere thing, a masturbatory sleeve, a blow up doll, a punching bag. Without a voice she had no life or form to stop him or create uneasy guilt. The guilt would come later. With or without consent, it always did, and yet, he couldn’t stop himself from gorging on the hedonistic delight of a woman’s naked and bound body taking pain for his gratification.