One of the rangers said, “Both of you just relax, you may be experiencing shock, so make sure you keep breathing…”
Angelyn caught my gaze and smiled. “Thanks,” she said.
“No problem. You’d have done the same for me.”
“No, you’d have found a way to climb back up all on your own,” she said.
I laughed it off, because she was looking at me like I was some kind of superstar, and I didn’t like it. Now I wasn’t just the kid from Mars, I was the kid from Mars who did crazy stunts. Somebody else would have helped Angelyn. Anybody would have.
The park instructor, Keller, was there, and for all his suspicious enthusiasm he seemed pretty competent here, effectively gathering the rest of the students together and making sure they were all right. Farther back on the trail, observing, her arms crossed, was Stanton. She didn’t look happy. I suppose not. Imagine having to report to Angelyn’s prestigiously important parents that their daughter had smashed onto the valley floor during a confidence-building exercise.
The medical guy checked us all out, put antibiotic ointment on our cuts and scrapes—George and Tenzig also had burns on their hands from pulling on the rope. But we were all declared healthy and fit to travel. A couple more air cars arrived to carry us back to the bus. So we didn’t have to walk back. But was it weird that I was a little disappointed that I didn’t get to finish the trek on my own two feet?
By the time we got back to the base meadow, the other groups had returned already, had their gear collected, and were ready to go. They looked on in awe as we disembarked the emergency air car. We were going to have to explain all this a million times, weren’t we?
I didn’t want to talk to anyone. My arms hurt. Breathing hurt.
Finally, we were on the buses and headed back to the shuttleport, and from there back to Galileo. I expected to sleep the whole time.
I was shocked when Charles sat next to me on the bus. I stared at him, but he just looked straight ahead, not saying anything. Both of us had white gauze on our hands, which made us look kind of alien. More alien, rather.
“Aren’t you going to tell me that was stupid?” I asked him, once we’d started moving and he still showed no sign of interacting with me. “That I should have waited and come up with a better plan?”
“You didn’t know if we had time for a better plan,” he said. “You did what you thought was right.”
“But was I?”
“Obviously. We all survived, didn’t we?”
“But—” I slouched. “Are you sure? There had to be a better way.”
“That’s the shock talking, Polly.”
“I’m not in shock.”
“A dangerous experience, extreme physical exertion, of course you’re in shock.”
“I wasn’t really in danger—”
“Sometimes I think it would take a nuclear explosion to do you in, as much trouble as you get out of,” he said.
“That almost sounds like a compliment.”
“I’m mostly thinking about how to use that trait to our best advantage.”
That sounded ominous.
After a few more minutes, he asked, “What do you think happened?”
“Rockslide. You saw the way that section of trail was open—that area had a lot of rockfall. Happens all the time.”
“But this time it just happens to fall right when a group of students is walking under it,” he said, and I couldn’t tell if he was asking a question or thinking out loud.
“Erosion,” I said. “Coincidence.”
“You think they would have had us hiking up there if they knew that rock was about to fall? You don’t think they check that sort of thing?”
“What are you saying?” I was speaking in a hushed tone—we both were. “Someone pushed that rock down on purpose?”
“I didn’t say that,” he said.
Leave it to Charles to turn a simple accident into a big production. “This isn’t some kind of puzzle for you to solve. It’s just an accident.”
“You’re probably right,” he said, straightforward, like nothing was wrong. “Don’t worry about it.”
Easy for him to say.
15
Back at Galileo, Stanton escorted Angelyn and me to the infirmary. My second visit there in a matter of weeks. I wondered if that was a record? I kept telling her I was okay, I felt fine, I hadn’t gotten hurt, I was just banged up a little. My ribs hurt when I breathed, but they’d get better. She muttered something about stress and made us stay. We sat on chairs next to each other until the nurse arrived. Charles somehow avoided accompanying us, even with his torn-up hands. I didn’t know how.
Angelyn still held a thermal blanket wrapped around her shoulders. She hadn’t said much, and even now her head was bowed. She was shivering, just a little.
“Hey,” I prompted, “you okay?”
She straightened, as if I had woken her up from a nap. “Ms. Stanton says I might still be in shock. That’s why she wants the nurse to look at us.”
I didn’t feel like I was in shock. Sure, I’d been scared—the whole thing was kind of a rush, really. Lots of adrenaline. But I wasn’t sick. Angelyn still looked as pale as she had when she was clinging to the slope. “That was pretty hairy stuff. When I saw you halfway down that rockslide—oh, my gosh, I thought I was going to throw up.” I laughed—not because we’d been in danger, but because we’d survived. I remembered the thrill, when I knew I had hold of her, and she wasn’t going to fall. “But it’s okay. We were smart, we got out of it. We’re okay.”
She hugged herself tighter. “I almost died. I’ve never been that close … to almost dying. I’ve never even thought about it before. Now I can’t stop thinking about it.”
I looked at her. “You weren’t going to die. Maybe get smashed up pretty bad…” Probably best not to go there. “Besides, you can’t think about it all the time. I mean, if you really think about it, everybody’s that close to dying all the time. Our bus could have gone off a cliff, the suborbital could have crashed, some weird disease could sweep through the residence halls—”
“No,” she said, shaking her head. “None of that could happen, all the safety protocols, everything’s so safe. You don’t have to think about it.”
“You can fall and die spontaneously at any time, really. There was this guy who worked with my mom, back on Mars. One day, he just fell over. Died right there, without a sign or anything. Turns out it was a brain aneurysm. A blood vessel just blew up and killed him. He’d had yearly checkups and they’d never caught it. Thing is, something like that could happen anytime, to anyone—”
“Polly, can you just be quiet, please?”
I slouched and shut up. Thing was, I hadn’t really thought about it before, either. The way I grew up, the way everyone on Mars grew up—we were taught that the planet would kill us if we weren’t careful. An air lock could blow, the power systems could fail. If the colony buildings depressurized, if we went outside without enough oxygen, if the heating system went out—there were so many ways you could die on Mars, you didn’t think about it or you’d never get anything done. That was what I’d been trying to tell Angelyn. But it came out wrong.
It meant you always knew where the emergency breathers were. You were always ready to react.
The nurse arrived. Same one as last time, and she rolled her eyes a little bit when she saw me. I must have looked okay—surly and glaring, actually—because she went to Angelyn first, took her temperature and blood pressure, checked her bandaged cuts and scrapes, and announced that she needed to stay under observation overnight. Angelyn actually looked relieved, like she felt better with someone watching over her.
I got my temperature and blood pressure taken, then was poked and prodded, which made my chest hurt even worse. The nurse frowned. Then made me stand behind a bone scanner.
“Cracked ribs,” she said.
“What does that mean?” I said.
“You’ll need to rest.”
<
br /> So I had to stay in the infirmary overnight, too. She also prescribed extra calcium supplements. Apparently, my non-Earth bones were so weak they’d taken damage from the pressure on the rope, and I was lucky they hadn’t all broken and collapsed my lungs and killed me. The nurse asked what made me think I could tie a rope around my middle and climb up the side of a mountain? I answered, Because it worked?
The overnight nurse stayed in her office, leaving Angelyn and me on our beds in the infirmary, with the lights out, only a glow coming in from the hallway.
I had to admit, lying flat on my back, perfectly still, felt kind of good. I still hurt when I breathed. Cracked ribs, right.
“Polly? Are you awake?” Angelyn whispered from her bed.
I blinked, startled; I’d been almost asleep. “Yeah.”
“I just want to say thank you. You saved my life. So thank you.”
Saved her life—sounded very momentous. Huge, really, and in a way, scarier than falling. I didn’t want to be responsible for something so important. I’d helped her because I could, because that was what you did—helped people. At the colony, we couldn’t survive without working together.
“I’m really glad you’re okay,” I whispered back.
I heard her shuffle as she arranged her blanket, rolled over, and settled in to sleep.
Now, I was awake, totally, and all I could think about was the pressing ache across my ribs when I breathed. I couldn’t believe how much had happened over the last two days; it all seemed hazy now. Like it had happened in some video about someone else. Angelyn hadn’t really fallen, and I hadn’t really saved her. The rockslide hadn’t really happened.
But it had. Against all odds, it had.
* * *
The next morning, I demanded to be set free, cracked ribs or not. I didn’t have a concussion, I wasn’t bleeding, I didn’t want to be here anymore. The place smelled like a hospital and my stomach was turning. I promised the nurse I’d rest, and I got a note in my file excusing me from PE for the next two weeks. Angelyn was still asleep. She’d be fine, but the nurse would let her stay as long as she needed to.
Another note from Mom arrived on my handheld. Once again, Stanton must have reported what had happened immediately. Was she sending my mom reports every week? Every day? Why did that give me chills? The note wasn’t long, just saying that she was glad I was all right, and that she was proud of me for “stepping up” when someone needed help. Again, I felt baffled. Why wouldn’t I? Wouldn’t anyone?
I went to the dining hall for breakfast.
As soon as I entered the room, people looked at me, even more than normal. Even worse than after the motorcycle incident. Their heads bent together as they whispered. I blushed. I didn’t really want to know what they were saying. Ladhi and Ethan were sitting together, and I joined them. Charles wasn’t here.
“Hey, it’s the big hero!” Ethan said in greeting.
I scowled. “Is that what everyone’s saying?”
Ladhi stared. “Polly, of course they are. I was there, I saw the whole thing—it was amazing. You were amazing!”
“It was … I just…” I slouched and stared at my toast. “I didn’t do it to be amazing. I didn’t even really think about it.”
“It still makes you a hero,” Ethan said. “Maybe even more of a hero.”
“Is Angelyn okay?” Ladhi asked. “No one’s seen her.”
“She’s still in the infirmary,” I said. “She was in shock.” My shock seemed to be delayed—I was starting to feel twitchy. “Did any of that seem weird to you guys?”
“Which part of it?” Ethan said. “Because the whole trip seemed pretty weird to me.”
“If there was even the slimmest chance of an accident happening, do you think they’d have had us out there?”
“I suppose there’s always a chance of an accident. Transport breaking down, building catching on fire.”
“Maybe the whole thing was only supposed to look dangerous. Like it was all a setup to see how we’d react.”
Ethan shook his head. “Accidents happen, that’s all it is.”
Before I could reply, a hush fell over the dining hall. Angelyn had entered the room and went to the kitchen for her tray of food. She must have decided she’d had enough of the infirmary, too. Everyone was staring at her like they’d stared at me. She looked okay—the color had come back into her face, she was clean, her hair washed and done up in a braid. A big gauze bandage covered her elbow where she’d cut it on a rock. It looked incongruous with her otherwise neat appearance.
She scanned the tables, and when her gaze found me, her eyes lit up. She came over to join us, and I shifted to make room.
“Hey, how’re you feeling?” I said.
“Better. It’s hard to believe it even happened now. Seems like a dream.” Her smile was pensive.
“Oh, my gosh,” Ladhi said, pointing at the bandage. “How bad did you get hurt?”
Angelyn shrugged, blushed. She’d probably been hoping no one would notice. “A few scrapes. It itches a little.” Ladhi seemed very impressed. “I think Polly got hurt worse than I did—cracked ribs, the nurse said.”
“Oh, my gosh,” Ladhi repeated. “And you didn’t even say anything.”
“I get out of PE for two weeks,” I said.
“And she just shrugs it off,” Angelyn said.
We ate, then it was time to go to class. As we were cleaning up and shoving our trays back through the window to the kitchen, Angelyn stayed close to me.
She bent her head, lowering her voice to tell a secret. “The psychologist thinks I should go out again. Hiking, rock climbing, something. Overcome my fears or something like that. I wanted to ask you—will you go with me?”
“Yeah, sure,” I said.
“Good,” she said. “Thanks.”
I should have said no. I’d passed that test, I’d proved myself, I didn’t want to go through that again. But I said yes without thinking, just like I threw myself off that trail without thinking. Because we had to help each other. Despite all the competition, we did.
Well, most of us had to help each other. On my way out of the room, after dropping off my tray, Tenzig sauntered up to me, walking with me into the hallway.
“What do you want?” I said, more surly than was probably necessary.
“What you did yesterday? Totally slick,” Tenzig said. His smile seemed genuine, like he was really impressed, but with him it was hard to tell. “Rescuing someone like Angelyn? That’ll erase any black marks on your record. Good job.”
“I didn’t do it to erase any black marks,” I shot back. “I did it because I could—anyone could have done it.”
“Don’t bet on it. A lot of people just don’t have the guts for it,” he said, and I scowled. “Polly, don’t look so sour. I’m serious. Piloting programs love that sort of thing. It shows you have what it takes.”
“I already know I have what it takes.”
“Yeah, and now they will, too. I was wrong—you won’t need my help at all.” He stuck out his hand for me to shake.
I had to wonder what the joke was. In his world, I didn’t have enough status or pull to be able to get him anything, so why would he be nice to me? Then again maybe, just maybe, he was being nice. I took a chance and shook his hand. His grip against mine was warm and sure, not too loose, not too tight—not trying to start some kind of contest.
Then, instead of letting go, he pulled himself close, leaned in casual-like, and kissed me on the cheek. Not a big kiss. Just a light press of dry lips on skin that sent a spark flying to my scalp.
He turned and walked away, head bowed, expression hidden, as if the whole thing had been spontaneous and innocent and he was afraid of what I was going to think. What did I think? I touched my face; I could still feel where he’d kissed me, and smell the soap on his skin.
I wondered: What was that?
16
“What are you wearing to the banquet?” Angelyn asked me at breakfast abo
ut three weeks after the hiking accident and a couple of weeks before said banquet.
The banquet. Everyone had been talking about it for days. Around the end of the year, the school held a big party for students and their families—Earth families, who didn’t have to travel a couple hundred million kilometers to get here—to celebrate the winter holiday and the halfway point in the year. Apparently, it was a big deal.
I shrugged. “This, I guess.”
“Oh, no. You can’t wear that.”
I looked down at my school uniform. “What else am I supposed to wear?”
“You wear that every day. This has to be special. Didn’t you bring anything nice from home?”
“I could only bring what I could carry. Weight restrictions. I’ve got a couple of shirts and a pair of pants. What do you mean by nice?”
“A dress. Party clothes. Something snappy.”
I didn’t even know what that meant. I stared blankly at her.
“You don’t have anything?” she said.
“It’s at the school. I figure my uniform ought to be fine.”
“No one else will be wearing their uniforms. Seriously Polly, we really need to go shopping.”
I didn’t know how to do that. I kept looking at her like she was speaking a different language, and she sighed, exasperated. “Sit by me at study period tonight and we’ll start looking.”
So that evening instead of studying for biology I sat with Angelyn and looked at dresses on her handheld. The craziest outfits, every color I could imagine and then some, skintight with flounces and ruffles on shoulders, hips, and hems. Shining and sparkling fabric. The whole idea seemed to be to turn people into decorated artwork, because I couldn’t imagine actually functioning in a gown like that. Angelyn scrolled through dozens of them and sighed at every one.
“See anything you like?” she asked.
“I don’t know.” I wrinkled my nose. I didn’t even know what I was supposed to like. “What are you wearing?”
Her eyes got wide and shining as she punched up a new file and showed me a picture. The gown was … beautiful. I couldn’t even say why it was beautiful, I could just tell that it would make Angelyn look gorgeous and slinky and very grown-up. It was midnight blue and made of some fabric that rippled and shimmered across the model’s body, clinging to curves and falling away like water. Its neckline scooped almost to her breasts, and thin straps left her arms bare. Some kind of electronics made spots of light glow and swirl on the skirt, like actual stars. I imagined Angelyn in that dress, with her hair done up like the model’s, in curls that fell in waves over her shoulders. She wouldn’t look like Angelyn anymore.