“George!” Elzabeth called and ran forward. George’s expression softened with relief and he opened his arms, catching her and hugging tight. They stood there for a long time, clinging to each other. Might have been the sweetest thing I’d ever seen. Even if it was George and Elzabeth.
They pulled apart only when Stanton said, “Mr. Montes. What a relief. You’re not hurt, I assume?”
George and Elzabeth stared at her. The security guys moved in and asked a few questions—to make it all seem real. George went with the security guys to a corner of the lobby. Elzabeth refused to leave his side and no one argued. Stanton came to face down the rest of us.
Like Charles said—it was all theater.
I waited to see whom Stanton was going to yell at first, and what exactly she was going to yell about. But she didn’t. She just stood there, her expression still, and said, “Well. Thank goodness it all turned out well. Everyone, go back to your rooms. We’ll return to Galileo in the morning. Everyone needs to be packed and in the lobby by eight A.M.”
“That’s it?” I said, because I couldn’t help it. Charles elbowed my arm.
“That’s it, Ms. Newton,” Stanton said. She acted like she’d won something. But what? This was some kind of foot race, but where was the finish line?
“Come on, Polly,” Charles said, taking hold of my arm. “You must be very tired and should get some sleep.”
How was I supposed to fight back if no one would let me, and if there wasn’t even anything to fight against? Didn’t change that I felt like I ought to be fighting something.
Maybe it was me. I was just going crazy. Again, I blamed the gravity. I could live with that.
20
And that was the trip to the Manhattan Cultural Preserve. I wanted to say I had a good time. The place could convince anyone that maybe Earth wasn’t so bad after all, if it had horses. But I couldn’t think about anything without thinking about Stanton and what was going to happen next. Something was going to happen next. My stomach hurt thinking about it.
Galileo Academy and its grounds were supposed to be beautiful and awe inspiring, but it felt more and more like a prison. The cameras felt like eyes, and every instructor seemed to be paying extra-close attention to me, making notes on every little thing I did wrong. Because everything I did was wrong, I was sure. Except in Ms. Lee’s astrophysics class. She still smiled when I raised my hand.
George was fine. Acted like nothing had happened, even. He didn’t treat me any different than he had before, which was fine. If it had happened to me, I’d have pretended nothing was different, too. You didn’t want to draw too much attention to yourself, after all.
After a week, the routine had stayed routine, which was why I didn’t expect George to corner me at PE. We’d been running, and I’d been in the back with the rest of the offworld kids. We didn’t wheeze and straggle like we used to, but we still lagged behind the others. We got back to the locker rooms about twenty minutes after everyone else, and George was waiting by the outside door, slouching with his arms crossed, until he caught my gaze.
He waited until everyone else was inside before calling out, “Polly.”
I shouldn’t have stopped, but I did, letting him pull me aside.
“What do you want?” I said flatly, too tired to be offended.
“I just wanted to say…” He looked at his feet, then up again. Scuffed a toe on the ground. Was he actually nervous? “I know we haven’t really gotten along, and I probably could have been a little nicer and all…”
All I could do was stare. What was he doing? I braced to run, just in case.
He must have talked for a full minute, explaining: “… and whatever was really up with those guys and the kidnapping, I don’t even know. But Elzabeth told me everything that happened, and you and Charles stuck your necks out for me. And, well. Thanks. I really appreciate it. If there’s ever anything I can do for you, let me know. All right?” He was blushing a little, and his smile was tight and nervous, waiting for me to respond.
I didn’t know what to say. This didn’t seem like a trick. He was being genuinely … nice. I could tell because he’d never sounded like that before, at least not to me.
“I didn’t do it to get any favors from you,” I said finally. “I did it because it was the right thing to do.”
“I can still be grateful. Just keep it in mind.” He turned and walked into the building.
I would have gone through all that for anyone, if I thought he was being hurt. Did he even understand that? Maybe he did. Maybe this was the only way he knew how to say thank you. Because it was all about who could do what for you—Tenzig knew this, and proved it when he took me aside as we were walking back to the residence hall from class.
“You’ve figured out the system, I see,” Tenzig said.
“What are you talking about?” I shot back.
“Sucking up to the Earth kids. First saving Angelyn, then George. Lots of grateful, influential people lining up behind you. Pretty soon even Stanton won’t be able to give you a hard time.”
I stared. “I don’t even know what you’re talking about.”
“Yeah, you keep playing dumb. Makes you endearing. I get it.”
The game Charles kept talking about. Didn’t seem to matter how much I kept telling people I wasn’t playing a game—I didn’t know the rules, I didn’t know how to play, and didn’t even care—they saw what they wanted to see. I couldn’t win.
* * *
Then I got a video message from Mom. An actual video message, not just a note, and she was gushing. She was actually smiling all the way to her eyes. She went on and on about how clever I was for helping that boy—that boy with the very important family. She’d even gotten a personal message from George Montes’s father about what happened in Manhattan. After earning his praise, the reprimands from Stanton didn’t matter.
“You’re doing very well, Polly. I’m so proud of you. Just keep working hard and making friends, and everything will be perfect. Keep working hard, Polly.”
I supposed that was pretty close to “I love you.”
This was during the evening study period, and I tracked down Charles at his desk. I pulled a chair close and whispered, “I got a video from Mom.”
He raised an eyebrow and waited, so I kept talking. “She’s making me very nervous.”
“Because she’s being overly solicitous?”
“What?”
He glared. “She knows every detail of everything that happens here, and moreover she seems pleased about it.”
“It’s Stanton, isn’t it?” I said. “Stanton is reporting to her.”
He blinked in surprise. Like he didn’t expect me to figure it out. “Yes. I assume she’s reporting to all the parents—but she has staff for that. Automated review forms. Our mother seems to be getting much more detailed information.”
“It’s making me nervous,” I repeated.
“It should.” Then he glanced around, over his shoulder like he was in an actual old-style spy video. “Meet me outside the front doors of the weight room before your PE class tomorrow.”
“Why, what—”
“Quietly,” he whispered. “I have to show you something.”
* * *
I was sure he wasn’t going to be there and would leave me standing there like an idiot while everyone else did their weight rotations. Then Franteska, the upperclass student supervisor, wandered over to stand with me.
“He here yet?” she asked.
“What?” I replied stupidly.
She gave me a look. “Your brother said he wanted to talk.”
“To you?”
“How is it you two are even related? I thought twins were supposed to be the same.”
“Welcome to the infuriating world of genetics,” I said. She huffed in agreement.
Just then Charles came down the corridor to the weight room. With him was Harald, Franteska’s classmate, who was supposed to be supervising the running PE se
ction.
Harald said, rather loudly and obviously in a way that made Charles wince, “Newton here might be interested in weight training, so I thought you both could talk to him about it.” He glanced at the camera in the corner for only a second, but it was still really obvious.
So this was all staged for the benefit of anyone who might be spying on us. Crazy weird.
“Tell Polly what you told you me,” Charles said as we clustered together, pretending we were discussing weights.
Harald said, “Everyone’s talking about your class’s field trips. Every year goes on trips—Yosemite and Manhattan are standard for first-years. But in the thirty years of the school’s history, nobody’s ever had an accident. Not the way your class has. Even in the middle of Yosemite, everything’s controlled. It’s part of Galileo’s reputation.”
Franteska added, “None of this is supposed to be dangerous. It’s about building community. That’s what Galileo is about—developing connections that will benefit us for the rest of our lives. Networking. We’ll always work together.”
“Well, that’s kind of elitist,” I muttered.
“Of course it is, that’s the point,” Harald answered.
“Tell her the rest,” Charles said.
Harald took a deep breath. “I was doing an intern shift at administration and I overheard Stanton. I think she was recording a message rather than talking to someone. But she explained that you two were undermining her efforts to integrate you into the system. She kept insisting that Galileo wasn’t structured to properly assimilate Martians and that she might need to take more extreme measures if you didn’t start fitting in soon.”
Charles nodded for my benefit. “If Galileo is meant to build community, we would never be a part of that community without serious intervention.”
Franteska shrugged. “I don’t know. You’re not too bad, once people get used to you.”
Both Charles and I glared at her for that.
“If Stanton’s manipulating the system, it affects everyone here. Not just us,” Charles said. “So what’s the next field trip? I’m asking in the name of community, of course.”
Franteska and Harald glanced at each other. “It’s a secret,” she said. “We’re not supposed to talk about it. It’s supposed to be a surprise.”
Harald tried to sound comforting. “All the first-years do it. It’ll be great. Especially for you guys.”
“Even if you consider it in terms of accident potential?” Charles asked.
Franteska’s eyes went wide. “Oh, no—”
“Shh,” Harald hushed her when she started to say something. “I’m sorry, we can’t talk about it. It’s tradition. But I’m sure … I’m sure everything will be fine. I’m sure of it.”
“Right. Thanks,” Charles said flatly. “Have fun lifting weights, Polly.” He stalked away. Harald shrugged and went after him.
“It’ll be fine,” Franteska repeated to me, but her smile was more of a wince.
“Sure it will,” I said. I wondered if weight throwing was a thing.
* * *
After PE, I started thinking—would getting kicked out of Galileo really be so awful? I could go back to Mars. I could do something worthwhile there. I didn’t believe I’d be cut off from piloting entirely. I could get another internship at the astrodrome. Somehow, I’d make it happen without all these so-called connections.
“What are you thinking?” Charles asked cautiously, suspiciously.
“It’s like you said when we first got here. Earth has systems set up so that nobody starves, and anyone who wants an education can get one—but not everyone can go to a place like Galileo, and that’s how they get an aristocracy. Family dynasties like the Chous and the Monteses. But Colony One isn’t old enough to have dynasties, an aristocracy, anything like that. Maybe Mom is trying to start one, with us? Is that why we’re here?”
“And what do you think about that?” he asked, like he was an instructor and I was the hapless student.
“I think if the Mars colonies are going to keep working, we have to look out for everyone. Mom’s not doing that, is she?”
“I don’t know,” he murmured, and I didn’t believe it. I didn’t believe that he didn’t know, that he didn’t have an opinion.
“Never mind,” I said, because I didn’t want to think about it anymore. “It’s like you said. If this is a game, maybe it’s better not to play.”
I totally blew off my homework that night. It felt great.
* * *
I worked on a plan to get myself kicked out of school. Steal a motorbike and take it off campus. Sabotage the plumbing in the dorm. Refuse to do any more PE. Punch Tenzig in the face during astrophysics. That would probably break my hand. It would be worth it.
Or maybe I could stick it out until the end of the year and convince Mom that I wasn’t cut out for Galileo and could I please come home. Maybe that would work. I could already see the look on her face, how disappointed she’d be, and I could hear her explain how I was giving up. Failing. Pilot-training programs didn’t accept failures. If I had known that going to Galileo would set me up for a failure that would not only not help me get into a good piloting program but actively prevent me from getting into any program … I felt like I’d been robbed. This was all a big con, and I was the biggest sucker in the universe.
But maybe I could take myself out of the game, as Charles kept calling it. Don’t compete. Let go of the need to be the best. Not be bothered at all when Tenzig tried to show me up. Maybe I could just get myself kicked off the next field trip, so at least I wouldn’t have to deal with any more wild expectations and crazy accidents. Stanton would probably be happy to leave me behind, seeing how much trouble I kept causing.
Maybe I could get sick. I researched diseases that we hadn’t been vaccinated against for something mild but annoying that I could catch so I wouldn’t have to go anywhere. But all I found were diseases so horrible they’d been eradicated and existed only in petri dishes in labs. And they wouldn’t just make me sick; they’d cripple me for life or kill me outright. Polio, smallpox … Maybe I could invent a disease. I could develop a severe allergy—to Earth.
Then I found out where our next field trip was going, the big secret Harald and Franteska wouldn’t tell us: we were going offworld. To the Moon. A lunar expedition. That meant an orbital shuttle, time on a station in low gravity, and a trip on a real M-drive ship to lunar orbit. The closest thing to home I could get without going interplanetary. And then a week on not-Earth. I really wanted to go. I didn’t want Stanton to know how much I wanted to go because then she’d put me on restrictions for sure. Grounded, really grounded. I hated that word.
I tried to stay very, very quiet for the next two weeks. I showed up with my uniform pressed and neat, my attitude adjusted, and my lips firmly closed. I wouldn’t speak unless spoken to. I wouldn’t even complain about PE.
“Are you okay?” Ladhi asked on day three of Operation Don’t Piss Off Anyone. We were getting ready for bed, ten minutes before lights-out. Even Marie watched me, glancing out of the corner of her eye while she hung up her uniform.
“Fine. Why?” I said.
“You just seem kind of … tense.”
“I’m fine.” I slammed a closet door and yanked back the covers of my bed.
Ladhi said, “If you’re trying to stay out of trouble, you might want to rethink. You look like you’re about to explode.”
Wouldn’t that be fun? “I’m just … I can’t … I don’t want to…” I sat down on the bed and sighed. “It’s that obvious?”
Both Ladhi and Marie nodded. Ladhi came and sat next to me.
“If Stanton wants to boot you from the field trip, she’ll figure out a reason and there’s nothing you can do about it. If she wants you to go, because Charles is right and she’s putting us through some kind of stress and disaster test, you could burn down the school and she’ll still let you on the trip. So you might as well just … well, get back to normal.
”
“I don’t know what normal is anymore. I haven’t felt normal in weeks. Months.”
“Just hold out another week,” Ladhi said. “At least on the Moon we’ll be able to breathe without thinking about it. Boris can show us the sights. He’ll be so excited, you know?”
“And we can finally show up the Earth kids,” Marie added.
I didn’t even care about that anymore. Charles was right. Better to not play the game. But I was looking forward to the low gravity.
* * *
The schedule for the lunar expedition involved a lot of homework. Well, it looked like homework on paper, but I already knew a lot of it. All of us from offworld did. Finally, the Earth kids were going to be at a disadvantage. Hard not to feel smug about it.
We’d take a shuttle to Cochrane Station, where we’d have a tour, emergency-procedure training, and then go for low-g and zero-g training, which I was really looking forward to. From there we’d take a short-hop M-drive ship to lunar orbit, then another shuttle to Collins City, where we’d stay for three days of classwork, including planetary geology and colony-systems engineering. Then we’d take a shuttle to a research station at the Sea of Tranquillity to collect our own geology samples, which we’d then take back to the lab and analyze. It wasn’t like we’d be discovering anything new, but it was still exciting. At least I thought so. It was real work. On top of that we had to calculate orbital trajectories for the entire trip, which wasn’t hard because we could use our handhelds, and if you didn’t enter in the right variables, you’d come up with a mess. And if I asked nicely, maybe I could get onto the bridge of the M-drive ship. The possibilities were wide-open. Not to mention it felt a little like going home.
After a sudden paranoid notion that Stanton would see how excited I was about the trip and ground me out of spite, I settled down and took Ladhi’s advice. Just act normal. Just play it cool.
At study hall a couple of days before we were due to leave, I asked Charles if he was looking forward to the trip.