He’d voiced his regret they had spent the summer living rough in Link’s outbuilding, but he didn’t see what she did. She had no regrets. This had been the best summer of her life. She had Tobias, and with his patience, she was gaining control of her animal in ways she never imagined possible. And she’d found an unexpected friend in Link. Compared to Perl Island, Wolfland, as Fox called it, was comparable to heaven.
“Tell me more about your brother,” Tobias said as he turned onto the main drag in Galena.
“Oh he’s a total dipshit. And I love him. He and my parents think I landed some big job in a lab in the lower forty-eight. They think I can’t visit because the airfare is too expensive. I’ve only talked to them a few times since…you know.”
“You can visit them now. You’ve come a long way, and I think you’re safe around people now.”
“Really?” Hope bloomed in her chest.
“Yeah. You should spend the holidays with them. Reconnect. And then next April, we’ll make a trip up to Anchorage together, and I’ll ask your dad for his blessing. I thought about calling him before I asked you, but some things just don’t feel right over the phone.”
Vera’s face stretched in a grin, and she pulled his arm over her shoulder, snuggled her face against his bicep. “He will love you. My mom, too. They didn’t like Jonathan much. I don’t even think they could figure out why. He just never sat well with their instincts. You’re a good man, though. Good to me. I can’t wait for them to meet you.”
“Will you ever tell them?”
“About Fox?”
Tobias nodded and pulled into a parking spot right in front of the only diner in town.
“I don’t know. I don’t think so. I have changed so much since my family saw me last that I think it’ll be a lot already. Plus Elyse told me over the radio that there are laws on who we can tell.”
“Well, Clayton lays down the laws, and me and my brothers enforce them. You can do whatever the fuck you want, and I’ll back you.” His voice sounded deadly and dangerous, and she believed him. This was the advantage to pairing with the biggest, baddest predator shifter in existence. The fear factor diminished considerably at the top of the food chain.
“Wait there,” he murmured, cutting the engine. Tobias jogged around the front of the Bronco and opened her door for her, then pulled her hand to the crook of his arm as he led her across an icy patch and into the diner.
He wore a navy sweater that clung to his wide shoulders and dark jeans that sat just right on his tapered hips. Her mate cut a striking silhouette, but it was his eyes as he turned and graced her with a smile over his shoulder that held her. He used word “love” sparingly, but his eyes always revealed his feelings. It was enough.
As they waited for a table, Tobias held her hand as she rested her cheek against his arm.
The hunchbacked woman with an easy smile said, “You two make a beautiful couple. How long have you been married?”
“We’re getting married next spring,” Vera said as another wash of excitement zinged through her. Sometimes she forgot how heavy the meaning of Tobias’s ring on her finger was.
“It feels like I’ve always been with her, though,” Tobias said.
Vera looked up at him in surprise. Usually when they came to town for short visits and supply runs, Tobias didn’t talk to anyone. He was a quiet man, and it was usually up to her to carry on conversations. Her mate smiled down at her and kissed the top of her head.
“How long have you been married?” she asked the woman, whose husband was leaning against her shoulder, staring vacantly out the window.
“Fifty-three years,” she said proudly. “I’ve loved every one.”
“Silver,” the host called.
“Oh, that’s us. It was nice talking to you,” Vera said, waving to the woman.
“You too, dear. Good luck with wedding planning.”
“Thanks.” The fact that she could very well be planning this wedding on her own while her mate hibernated suddenly felt like another hundred pounds added to the already substantial weight on her shoulders.
No, tonight was going to be a good night. She wouldn’t think about her failures. Not right now.
The host led them to a booth in the corner and set their menus on opposite sides of the table. With a polite smile, Tobias slid in next to Vera and dragged his menu to him. She understood. She didn’t want to be away from him for even a minute, even if only a table separated them.
And when the waiter showed up and Tobias had ordered enough food to feed a small army, her mate leaned in closer and told the server that he wanted to pay for the meal of the couple sitting at the table across the room. Vera looked over his shoulder and grinned at the older couple they’d talked to who were settling into a small two-seat table near the opposite wall. Sweet Tobias.
After a beer and a glass of cheap red wine were delivered to their table, Tobias sat back, draped his arm around Vera’s shoulders and said, “I ordered a karaoke machine.”
“You did not!”
“I did. It’ll be delivered to the Galena post office in a couple weeks.”
“Oh, my gosh!” she crowed in disbelief. “Well now it’s going to be a party.”
“Hell yeah, it will be. I can’t wait to see you get up there and do your thing.”
“You’ll be singing with me.”
“I will not. My voice is shit.”
“Perfection isn’t the point of karaoke, McBeefcake. Fun is.”
“Mmm, well maybe if I get enough moonshine in me, I’ll consider it. As a wedding present.”
She took a long sip of her wine and shook her head. “Uh-uh, I want sausage for my wedding present.” She waggled her eyebrows. “Werebear sausage.”
Tobias nearly choked on his beer. He cast a quick look around and lowered his voice. “Stop it right now, or you’ll get some of that werebear sausage up against the sink in the bathroom.”
Vera opened her mouth to give him a snarky retort, but the server showed up with the three appetizers Tobias had ordered, so she held her tongue.
Tobias leaned over and nipped her neck, sending her into a peel of giggles, then he began dragging cheese fries to her plate. He always did that, served her before himself. It was one of the million things she adored and respected about him.
“Who do you want me to make invitations for on your side?”
“Well you already invited my asshole father, so I’m good.”
Carefully, she asked, “Do you want me to invite your mom?” He didn’t talk about her. In fact, she knew next to nothing about the woman since Tobias skittered away from any mention of her. Even her inner animal drew up curiously at this conversation.
“No need. She wouldn’t come, and I wouldn’t want her there anyway.”
“Why not?” Vera asked nonchalantly as she pulled a long strand of cheesy goodness from a fry.
“She left when I was too young to remember her. Just bailed. Some people aren’t meant to be parents, and my dad knocked up the wrong lady. He chose her, but she didn’t choose him back. And she never even knew what we were. She’s some fancy news anchor up in Anchorage. I tracked her down when I was fifteen, right before the first hibernation. Jenner missed her, or maybe he missed the idea of her. I didn’t, but I watched my brother pine for a mother figure, and I wanted to know how she could do that to her kids. Not for me, but for my brother. I love…” Tobias swallowed hard and cast her a sideways glance. “I love my brothers in my own way. I’m protective. I wanted answers before I told Jenner who and where she was. I wanted to make sure she wouldn’t hurt him again.”
“And?”
Tobias shook his head in disgust. “She would’ve hurt him. She didn’t have any feelings about what she’d done. She was proud she’d left and got the life she wanted. Even called us an anchor around her neck. Said cutting the weight was the best thing she ever did.”
Vera exhaled slowly and leaned against his arm. “I’m sorry.”
Tobias
twitched his head. “Margo Costa.”
Vera nearly choked on a french fry. “Margo Costa is your mom?”
“Yeah.”
“Holy shit, McBeefcake. Wow.” Stunned, she frowned and leaned back into the soft cushion of the bench. She’d watched Margo Costa on the news for years. “I can toilet paper her house if you want.”
With a chuckle, Tobias spooned a pair of stuffed mushrooms onto her plate. “I don’t doubt you would, protective little mate. You shot my dad defending me. I can only imagine what kind of rampage you could unleash on my mom. Let her be, though. I like her completely detached from my life.”
Around a bite of food, she admitted, “When I was a kid, I used to toilet paper houses with my brother and his friends.”
“Is he older or younger?”
“Older by three years, but way less responsible than me. I had a tendency to be really nerdy in school, and he would always remind me to ease up on life and find the happy moments.”
“You do that,” Tobias said. “That’s one of the things I love about you. Even with all of the bad shit, you still laugh and joke and make the people around you feel happy. You’re pretty damned inspiring.”
“Really?”
Tobias downed his beer and nodded. “Really. Sometimes I like to just sit back and watch you talk to people. Strangers, Link, Lena and Elyse on the radio. You have this way of making people feel better, even if they’re having a shitty day, just by talking to you. Nobody would ever guess how much you’ve gone through. You kept your sweetness when you could’ve gone the complete opposite direction. You could’ve become cold and hard. I hope our cubs inherit that.”
“Our cubs?” she said, turning mushy. He’d only ever talked about the possibility of one, but she wanted a big family with him someday.
“Yeah. And I kind of hope they turn out to be little foxes.”
“So they don’t hibernate?”
“No,” he said, eyes going completely serious. “So we have a chance of having little girls that are just like you. Plus, if you had a bear cub, you’d realize real quick what little hellions we are and stop at one.”
She snorted. “I can only imagine what you and your brothers were like as kids.”
“Little brawlers. Always fighting.”
“For play or for real?”
“Both. Instinct trumps all for grizzly shifters. I think we loved and hated each other all at once. But we would’ve done anything for each other.”
“And now?”
Tobias shrugged. “I still feel the same. Especially over the past few months. I think seeing Ian and Jenner again, witnessing how good they are to their mates and realizing my dad was wrong about how life has to be for bear shifters, makes me want some kind of relationship with my brothers. I’d do anything for them. Yeah.”
Four plates of food showed up after that, and to her shock, Tobias ate everything she couldn’t. The sheer volume of calories he was taking in told her he was getting close to hibernation.
She’d done her research, and soon he would start getting tired.
Maybe she had a week with him.
Maybe less.
Tobias paid for their dinner and the older couples’, then took her window shopping after that. Outside of a winter wear store, something cold brushed her hand. She looked down in horror to find a perfect snowflake melting against her skin.
“It’s okay,” Tobias whispered, his eyes on the tiny white star. “I don’t want you to hate snow.”
“Snow will take you away from me.”
“No,” he crooned, hugging her tight under an awning as they watched the white flakes drift down, slowly blanketing the street. “Timing and cold cause hibernation. Someday snow will be fun for us.”
She could imagine it for a moment. Snowmen and sledding. Christmas lights up on some imaginary cabin wherever they settled. Stomping boots off before entering the house and riding a snow machine together. Everything would be different soon. She would make sure of it.
“Take me home.”
“Home?”
“Well, not home, silly bear. Take me to Link’s shed.”
Tobias’s lips were curved up in a smile as he kissed her, and when he angled his head and brushed his tongue against hers, she melted to him like that tiny snowflake on her hand. Her strong Tobias, unaffected by the signs of winter.
Easing away, he rested his forehead against hers and rocked back and forth in the slow falling snow. “Vera?”
“Yeah?”
“No matter what happens, I want you to know how much I care about you.”
“Winter feels like breaking up.” Her voice came out nothing but a soft squeak as she fought to keep her emotions in check.
“We’re not breaking up, or even taking a break. You’ll live a life while I sleep, but when I wake up, for me, it’ll be like no time has passed and nothing has changed. You’ll still feel this important.”
“You promise?”
Tobias nodded and kissed her again, just a soft pluck of her lips. “I promise.”
Chapter Seventeen
Vera stepped out of the car and nearly busted her ass on a slick patch. Tobias would’ve been worried if she hadn’t immediately doubled over and laughed. He cracked a grin as he slid around the Bronco toward her to make sure she didn’t go down the rest of the way.
“How are you so clumsy?” he teased. “You’re a fox.”
Vera swatted his arm and almost went down again. Tobias caught her around the middle and kept her from hitting the snow, but just when he thought she would wrap her arms around his neck and allow him to help her up, she spread out like a starfish and closed her eyes, the heels of her boots resting on the thin layer of snow. “It feels like I’m flying,” she whispered through a full-lipped smile he couldn’t drag his eyes from.
Funny. She made him feel like he was flying, too.
Instead of dragging her into the shed and fucking her silly like his bear wanted to do, he laid her down on the snow and took his place beside her, ignoring the cold flakes that fell into the neck of his sweater.
Even with the clouds above, there were still patches of stars and the faint glow of the northern lights. Blue tonight, like Vera’s eyes.
Vera blew a long, frozen breath, like a steam engine, and wrapped her pink mitten-clad hand around his. “Next year, we’re going to build a giant snow-werebear.”
“I’m gonna build a snow wereporcupine and kick it in its snow dick.” He was still pissed at Harlan and his many painful quills.
Vera giggled and stuck her tongue out to catch the falling flakes beside him, and he was stunned once again at how beautiful she was. Chestnut hair fanned across the fresh powder, eyes dancing in a way he hadn’t seen them in weeks. Her cheeks were likely pink from the cold, but he liked to think they were rosy because she was happy. He liked to think he was the reason for the color there.
He’d never done that before—made someone happy. Oh, people were grateful when he delivered supplies to them out in the bush, but this was different. Vera was the most important part of his life now, and every smile she gave him made him feel like maybe he wasn’t such a monster. Vera was sweet and loyal, and if someone so un-jaded could love him, perhaps he could do this. Maybe he could be the mate she deserved if he worked hard enough and long enough. Or maybe it was Vera’s chronic optimism that was rubbing off on him.
“Why do they call them piggyback rides?” she asked.
Tobias rested his cheek against the snow and studied the perfect curve of her petit little nose as she stared up at the stars. “Do you want a piggyback ride?”
“Yes, but why do they call them that?”
Tobias rocked upward, then stood and helped her onto his back. Hands hooked behind her knees, he strode easily toward the shed behind Link’s cabin.
Vera rested her chin on his shoulder. “A koalaback ride makes more sense, right?”
“It probably deviated from a different word in a different language and didn’t actuall
y refer to the animal originally.”
“Huh.”
Inside the shed, Tobias built a fire in the wood burning stove he and Link had brought in. He handled the chill much better than Vera did, and he hated the thought of her sleeping cold tonight. Usually his body warmth was enough to keep her comfortable, but he wouldn’t be here in the morning. Vera watched him quietly, head canted, her eyes the startling gold color that said her fox was near the surface. She was so damned beautiful here in this place, the glow of the fire pulsing against her pink cheeks.
“You love me,” she said.
He shut the door to the stove and nodded. “Very much.” More than anything.
“I can tell by the way you look at me.”
“Mmm,” he rumbled, his bear pushing a satisfied growl up his throat. Clever mate.
Tobias pulled her waist to his, then tugged the hem of her dress over her head. She was wearing the red lacy bra he’d bought her when he had flown a delivery from Anchorage. Vera liked feminine things, and here and there he had bought gifts he thought she would like. Sweet pea bubble bath soap and tiny bottles of different shampoos. The pair of snow boots she wore tonight and a new nightgown. She always gave him the biggest smiles when he surprised her, and then she always grew all self-conscious and said his gift was, “too much.” She was so damned cute. She didn’t realize it, but he gave her gifts for selfish reasons. He felt normal when he made her smile like that—less like an animal and more like a man.
Unsnapping her bra in the back, he reveled in her sexy sigh. Hooking his finger in front, Tobias pulled her lingerie gently off her arms and let it fall to the floor. Unable to resist her a second longer, he kissed her. Tasted her. Felt her. She let off a sexy, helpless moan, and his bear pushed for more. This was their last time…
Pain left a gash in his middle as he deepened their kiss, desperate to rid himself of the thought of what he had to do. Leaving felt impossible when he was here with her. Fingers fumbling with his need to be inside her, he pushed her tights down as she kicked out of her boots. Vera was burning up like a beautiful brush fire in his arms, growing hotter and more volatile with every touch of his lips and brush of his fingertips.