Once again, I felt a piece of my heart fall away. The old Brayden wouldn’t have been impressed with a house on the beach. He loved the mountains and the backwoods where he had grown up. It’s the one thing that had originally endeared him to Jake because he and Jake shared the same passion.
Brayden didn’t say much else to me during the drive. He fielded some calls on his phone while I stared out the window. I’d never been to Los Angeles, least of all California before, so I should have been more excited about seeing everything. But I just couldn’t get rid of the nagging feeling in the pit of my stomach.
When we arrived at the house, I couldn’t help feeling even more overwhelmed. It was a mansion more than it was a house. It had a sleek, modern design, and almost wall to wall windows to take in the views. “It’s something, isn’t it?” Brayden asked.
“It sure is.”
He took my hand and led me up the walk and into the house. I had assumed even with the other guys at the house that Brayden and I would have some private time to talk and reconnect. The moment we entered the house, we were surrounded by people. Scanning the room, I searched for a familiar face, but I didn’t see one. “My room is at the end of the hall. I know you’ve had a long flight, so why don’t you go take a shower and rest?” Brayden suggested.
“Um, okay.” I thought he might show me to his room himself, but he started talking to a tall, dark-haired guy with tortoise shell glasses. Taking a deep breath, I rolled my suitcase behind me as I went down the hall. The door on the right swung open, revealing Jake in some swim trunks. His eyes narrowed slightly at the sight of me. “Hey, Jake!” I said, a little over-enthusiastically. Since Brayden’s and my engagement, things had become tense between Jake and me, but in spite of all that, I couldn’t help but feel glad to see him.
“What are you doing here?” he demanded, as he crossed his arms over his chest.
I shrank a little at his tone. “Brayden invited me for Valentine’s Day weekend.”
“How sweet of him,” he said, sarcastically.
“I thought so.”
“Yeah, well, have fun.”
“Thanks.”
He stalked off down the hall, leaving me wondering yet again what his deal was. We had always gotten along so well, even when I was out on tour with them. I couldn’t imagine what had soured his view of me unless it was he felt I was trying to saddle Brayden down with marriage.
When I got inside Brayden’s room, I once again felt the sinking feeling in my stomach along with a tightening in my chest. Nothing in the room looked like him. While the furniture most likely had come with the house, there were no touches of Brayden. Even in his roost on the old bus, he had kept little mementos around to remind him of me, of home, and his family. None of those were here.
Considering how sanitized of personality the room was, I was surprised there was even a picture of us on the nightstand. Abandoning my suitcase, I went to pick it up. It was a double-sided frame. One picture was from the night we got engaged when AJ had taken a pic of us when we were kissing on top of the Ferris wheel. The other one was of us Homecoming night when I had been crowned queen. Brayden wasn’t a part of the court, but he had met me as I came off the field. With roses in my arms and my glittering tiara on my head, I’d run into his open arms. The yearbook photographer had captured the moment when I pulled back and stared into Brayden’s eyes. We both had such expressions of love on our faces.
I swept my hand over my heart, trying to ease the ache burning in my chest. I felt like I was in a deranged fairy tale where our once happily ever after had turned so very sour. Willing myself not to cry, I grabbed a fresh outfit out of my suitcase and then trudged into the bathroom. I hoped the shower might make me feel better, but it didn’t. After I finished, I wrapped myself in one of the silky robes hanging on the back of the door. With my hair wet, I went out onto the porch that ran the length of the house.
After staring out at the ocean for what felt like an eternity, Brayden’s strong arms came around my waist. “Mmm, you smell nice,” he murmured, in my ear.
“Thank you.”
“Sorry I had to take care of some shit.”
“It’s okay.”
His hand trailed up my stomach to cup my breast. “I’ve missed you so fucking much, Lily.”
“I’ve missed you, too.”
As he pinched my hardened nipple, his teeth grazed along my neck. “Wanna go inside?”
I nodded and then let him lead me back into the bedroom. For the next three hours, we tumbled through the sheets, rolled around on the floor, and splashed water around in the Jacuzzi tub. The more I was with him physically, the more I began to slowly feel a more emotional connection to him.
My heart and mind felt even more at ease when he refused the invitation from AJ to accompany him and the guys to a club opening. Instead, we stayed at the house, eating Chinese take-out and watching goofball comedies. It felt just like old times.
Just before midnight, he took me for a walk along the beach. Hand in hand we walked along the cool sand, letting the waves lap against our ankles. Then we stripped down and made love on the beach by a secluded dune. On the way back to the house, he stopped to kiss me in the moonlight. “I love you,” he said.
“I love you, too.”
And in that moment, everything was right and perfect between us.
LILY
THE PAST
I yawned. “Good morning.”
Brayden laughed. “Try afternoon, sleepyhead.”
After I shot up in bed, I glanced at the clock on the nightstand. It was twelve-thirty. “Oh no!” I moaned.
“What’s the matter?”
Untangling myself from the sheets, I replied, “You shouldn’t have let me sleep so long.”
“Why? I figured you needed the rest.”
“I don’t have that much time with you, so I don’t want to waste a minute.”
“Sounds like you’ve been missing me pretty badly,” he mused.
“Of course, I have.” I brought my hand to his face and rubbed my thumb along his jaw. “I love you so, so much. I hate to have to spend any time away from you.”
“I love you, too.” Jerking the sheet away from my breasts, he grinned. “Now why don’t you show me just how much you’ve missed me?”
“I can do that,” I replied
“I’m glad to hear it.” He then pushed me onto my back on the mattress.
***
After I showed Brayden how much I’d loved him to the tune of two orgasms for him and three for me, I slipped into the shower. Any other apprehensions I had about his feelings for me faded away when he brought me a tray of bagels, croissants, and fruit to the bedroom. Bundled in a robe, I chowed down on the feast before me.
“I have a surprise for you,” he said.
“You do?” I questioned through a mouth of jelly-filled croissant.
“Remember how I said there was a party for my label tonight?”
The bite of croissant I swallowed lodged in my throat. “Yeah, I remember.”
“Well, I gave our assistant your size and asked her to find you a dress for tonight.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, I didn’t want you to have to worry about getting a dress before you left. But more than anything, I wanted a dress you would feel comfortable in out here. I know how you feel about fitting in.”
And with those words, the happy little bubble of my day burst. “You mean you were worried about me not fitting in,” I countered softly.
He scowled at me. “That’s not it at all, Lils. I just wanted to get you something nice. What’s wrong with that?”
“Nothing.” I then forced a smile to my face. “I haven’t had a new party dress in a long time.”
He grinned and went over to the closet. He took out a garment bag and then unzipped it. “What do you think?”
It was a nightmare—both the dress itself and the world I found myself in. It was short, and I knew from the material it would be
skin tight on me. With the cutouts on the halter top, it would be showing a lot of cleavage too. While I’m sure it cost a fortune and had a famous designer’s name attached to it, it wasn’t me, and Brayden should’ve known that.
“That’s some dress,” I finally managed to say.
“I know, right? Fuck, Lils, you’re going to look so hot in this tonight.”
“Thanks,” I murmured.
He glanced at the clock. “We’ve got a few hours before we have to get ready. What do you want to do?”
“We could recreate last night with the movies.”
His brows furrowed. “You’ve never been to LA before, and you want to stay holed up here on a gorgeous day?”
I shrugged. “I just want to spend time with you.”
“I think we can do that and see some of the sites.” He jerked his chin at the bathroom. “Go get dressed, and we’ll go for a ride.”
“Okay,” I agreed, although I would have much rather just stayed in with him.
After throwing on some shorts and a T-shirt, I pulled my hair back into a ponytail and went to meet Brayden. He ushered me into the garage where a sleek, black Aston Martin convertible sat. “Oh my God, is this yours?”
“No, it’s the label’s. But it’s ours to drive as long as we’re staying at the house.”
“That’s amazing.”
“Wait until you feel how it rides.”
I slid onto the seat and buckled up. Brayden revved the engine, and then backed us out of the garage. Once we got on the main road, I knew exactly what he was talking about with the car’s ride. He drove me around some of the other parts of Venice Beach. Then we went to Hollywood. We strolled along the Walk of Fame and checked out the footprints at Grauman’s Chinese Theater.
While I had initially wanted to stay in, I had so much fun being out with Brayden. It felt like the past when we were exploring Atlanta together during our first year of college. Of course, the one thing that was different this time was Brayden being recognized by people. He got stopped three times for his autograph.
On the drive back to Venice Beach, we were both quiet. Brayden finally turned to me and smiled. “What are you thinking about?”
“Just about how much things have changed in the last few months.”
“For the better right?”
I shifted in my seat. “It’s much better for the band,” I replied.
Brayden frowned. “What are you not saying?”
Folding my hands in my lap, I sighed. “You don’t think things have been different between us?”
“I guess so. I mean, we’re both very busy right now.”
“I know that. It’s just…”
“Just what?”
“You’re different.”
He snorted. “Yeah, I guess I am. That’s what happens when a nobody becomes somebody.”
I couldn’t help cringing at his words. “You were never a nobody, Brayden.”
“In the industry I was. Now that’s all changed.”
“But it shouldn’t change you,” I protested.
Gripping the steering wheel a little tighter, Brayden said, “You can’t expect me to be the same person I was, Lily. People change as they mature and then when life puts them on a different path. I sacrificed a hell of lot to get where I am. Now that I’m here, I want to enjoy it. If that means partying or drinking harder than I used to, then I’m going to do it.”
“I see,” I murmured.
Brayden took his eyes off the road to momentarily pin me with a stare. “What are you getting at exactly? That I’m not the man you fell in love with or some bullshit?”
“No, that’s not it at all. You know I love you. It’s just hard for me since you’ve changed.”
“Sounds like it’s time you did a little changing.”
“So I can fit in better with you now?”
“Yeah.”
Hurt pierced my chest at his callousness. “Sure. I can try.”
“Glad to hear it.” To signal that the conversation was done, he reached over and turned on the radio. We didn’t talk the rest of the drive. When we pulled up at the house, I eased out of the car and headed inside. “We got about an hour before the car comes to pick us up. So get cracking on making yourself presentable,” Brayden said, with a grin.
“We couldn’t have me looking unpresentable, could we? That would be too mortifying,” I replied, before I stalked off to the bedroom.
I locked myself in the bathroom. I took another shower before I did my hair and makeup. When it was time to slide on the dress, I had to fight the urge to rip it to shreds. I hated the damn thing and everything it represented. But instead, I put it on. Standing in front of the mirror, I saw I had achieved just what Brayden wanted. I had transformed myself into an acceptable date for a desirable rock star like him to be seen with.
A knock came at the door. “Lils?” Brayden asked.
I unlocked the door for him, and he stepped inside. His eyes bulged at the sight of me. “Damn, you look amazing! Just like I thought you would.”
“Thank you,” I mumbled.
“Are you going to be mad at me all night?” he questioned softly.
Turning back to him, I shook my head. “I’m not mad at you. I’m hurt.”
“Just because I said you needed to be presentable?”
“It’s not just that one statement. It’s the way you’ve made me feel since I got here. That I’m not good enough to be with you.”
“Jesus, Lils, that not what I meant at all.” He drew me to him. “I’m sorry if I made you feel that way. You know I love you, and you’re the only woman I want to be with.”
I hoped, rather than believed, him to be sincere. “I love you, too.”
“Good. Now let’s go have some fun.”
***
When I got into the limo at the house, I was never so glad to see AJ and Rhys in all my life. I slid across the seat to hug them both. Neither one of them had a date with them. I wondered what had happened to AJ’s last girlfriend who I met once or twice. I didn’t ask where Jake was. After our initial run-in at the house, I hadn’t seen much of him.
Being with AJ and Rhys felt like old times, and it helped to ease the tension still hanging in the air between me and Brayden. When we got to the venue, I gasped and tried to hold my excitement in.
Brayden turned to give me an amused smile. “Why are you so fidgety all the sudden?”
“Um, hello, we’re at a party at the Chateau Marmont. This is huge!”
He gave an apathetic shrug. “I’m at these kind of places all the time now.”
“Yeah, well, I’m not,” I replied, as we got out of the car. On the way inside, I had to bite my tongue from squealing at some of the celebrities that walked past me.
When we got in the elevator, Brayden laughed. “You’re freaking out inside, aren’t you?”
I nodded. “Do you know that my students, especially the musical ones, would literally fall over in a heap at some of the singers and musicians I just saw? They might even piss their pants.”
“I don’t have to worry about you doing that, do I?”
I laughed. “No, but that doesn’t mean I’m not nervous.” Grabbing his arm, I said, “Promise you won’t leave me?”
“I won’t.”
“Not even to go to the bathroom?”
Brayden’s brows rose. “You want to go with me to piss?”
“Maybe. Or at least wait outside the door.”
“Jesus, Lils,” he muttered.
The elevator dinged open, and we stepped out onto the main floor. Wall to wall people packed the room. I shifted uneasily in my heels before gripping Brayden’s arm a little tighter. He led me through the crowd, occasionally stopping to talk to people. Most had no idea who I was, least of all that he had a fiancée. “We’ve got some good PR people hiding that one, don’t we?” he joked.
A middle-aged woman nodded. “Yes, they’ve got to keep the image that you’re all young, single, and available. The
image is just as important as the music.”
I gave her a fake smile. I didn’t see what harm it would do for people to know Brayden and I were engaged. Didn’t happy couples sell records as much as single guys? I knew it would be a losing game to push the issue around these people.
We continued working our way through the crowd. I had to fight myself from yawning at some of the boring conversations. I’d already spoken to at least fifty people before one finally said, “And what is it you do?” a balding man with a large gut asked.
“I’m almost finished with my teaching practicum. I should have a class of my own next year.”
“A teacher? What a noble profession.”
“Thank you.”
He winked at Brayden. “Since it doesn’t pay shit, you better keep your hooks in this one, eh?”
“Yes, I suppose I should,” I replied coolly. Brayden quickly steered us away from the man. “Great people,” I muttered.
“He’s an ass.”
“Yeah, he is, but I’m sure most of the people here would share his sentiments about my lowly tax bracket.”
Brayden ignored my comment. Instead, his attention seemed focused on the tall guy with glasses who I had seen at the house the day before. “Hey, Marcus, I didn’t get a chance to introduce you to my fianceé yesterday.”
Marcus sized me up. “So this is the future little woman?”
“I’m Lily,” I said, extending my hand.
“Nice to meet you. I’ve heard only good things about you.”
“I hope so.”
“Are you having a good time?”
“Oh sure,” I answered quickly.
Marcus laughed. “No need to lie. These parties can be so fucking boring.”
“If you say so.”
“Speaking of boring,” Marcus said before he leaned over and whispered something in Brayden’s ear. At Brayden’s nod, Marcus smiled. “Lovely meeting you Lily.”
“The same to you.”
As Marcus started walking off, Brayden said, “The label has some people they want us to meet.”
“But you promised you wouldn’t leave me,” I protested.