'You're welcome. Of course I wouldn't discuss anything with Kyle or ANYONE else. See you at 4. You mumble when you sleep.:('
Reading Mike's text I laugh to myself. Tyler always mentioned I talked and mumbled all the time when I slept. He also said it drove him crazy because he could never make out actual sentences. Instead he could only pick up random words that didn't make any sense to him.
Deciding to finally check my other texts I find myself holding my breath as I pull up Tyler's text from 7:12 last night- hours after our showdown.
'I really am sorry for all this. And I want you to know I still love you very much. I hope we can talk about this soon and maybe be friends? I've decided to keep the apartment if you really do want to move out. I guess I'll see you on Sunday afternoon? There’s no rush. Let me know when you're coming. Call me if you ever need anything.'
Thinking about Tyler keeping my apartment with his whore pisses me off. I'm the one who painted our place and decorated it. I made it a home for us, a very happy home I thought at the time. Just thinking about her living there now enjoying all my hard work and the furniture I paid for pisses me off even more.
Before I can stop myself I text, 'Don't be there Sunday after 1:00. And I need nothing from you. So fuck off.' Hitting send, I feel almost giddy. I don't swear often at people, and I never really needed or wanted to swear at Tyler before all this. It feels pretty good telling him off under the circumstances though.
Pulling up the next text from Tyler at 10:02 it only reads,
'I hope you're okay?'So I figure what the hell?
'Fuck. Off.' covers everything this morning.
Next I see a text from Kyle last night as well, so I mentally prepare for more bullshit.
'I know you know about Kaitlyn and I'm very sorry I didn't tell you. I wasn't being an asshole I just didn't know HOW to tell you. You were so sad and I felt so badly for you. And yes she's my sister but I don't approve of what they did at all. I didn't even know she was sleeping with Tyler until you told me. If you ever want to talk I'm still here for you.'
Three for three? Finding this all so amusing suddenly I text 'Fuck off' and send it back to Kyle.
And finally, there's a text from Selena from not long ago.
'You were supposed to call me first thing this morning. But its 9:30 and you haven't called and you're not answering your cell. Call me kiddo. I didn't like the way you looked last night. Luv ya.<3'
In the meantime, a text beeps through from Kyle again.
‘I’m really sorry for all of this. Thank you again for helping me study. You’re still the cutest red-headed Brainiac I’ve ever known. Take care.’
Nope. I’m not engaging Kyle again. He can go away like the rest of them as far as I’m concerned.
Going to the washroom, I have a quick shower and settle in for my phone call. Selena will probably demand I come over when I tell her everything but I don't want to yet. She'll make me cry when she hugs me and when Griffin sits in my lap to play I'll feel bad crying around him.
Using the little coffee maker and the one comp cup of coffee I settle in for Selena to make me feel better...
... And 45 minutes later I do feel a little better.
Selena's home is open to me as of today she offers. Her mother has a huge garage for my things, and she can get me into a little bachelor apartment in her building. She thinks she may even be able to convince her Super to let me rent it monthly with a security deposit so I can move out when I leave for school in a few months.
Oh, and Tyler is a fucking asshole.
Selena hates Tyler and thinks he's a total douchebag who she insists is going to beg me to take him back within weeks. Selena says she knows women like Kaitlyn, and she knows woman like me, and apparently I'm the type of woman men want a forever with 'once they get their rocks off' with women like Kaitlyn.
Selena admits she actually met Kaitlyn once at Mike's New Year’s Eve party last year when I was working. She also knows Tyler was there that night which naturally drives me mental wondering if that was the night things started between them. Just the thought of them dating, or screwing, or whatevering for the last 16 months makes me want to scream, and cry, and kill them all over again.
Finally, Selena gives me hell for renting this motel, and says she would have given Mike shit for letting me stay here alone if he hadn't spent the night with me. She also makes me promise I'll check out today and either stay with her or at Mike's starting tonight, which I promise I'll consider so she stops bugging me about it.
When I eventually hang up I realize Tyler broke my heart on Wednesday in a way I'll never get over, even if I eventually move past it. My exam was yesterday and I've set myself up for my future. It's now Friday and a plan is slowly forming for me.
I've lasted 2 days without Tyler and though it aches unlike anything I've ever known, I'm proud I'm still functioning. I'm doing this, and I know I'll continue to do this without Tyler moving forward.
*****
Walking in the back I prepare for a long shift. Friday shifts are 8 hours, but they're so much busier the time flies for us though the exhaustion settles in quicker.
Entering the employee lounge, I put my purse in my locker and turn for the mirror one last time. Smiling at Kelsey, I notice she's looking at me strangely but I don't know her well enough to question the strange look.
Kelsey's behavior suggests she knows what's going on in my personal life, but I honestly don't know how she would. Selena would cut out her own tongue before betraying a confidence of mine, and I doubt Mike would either. Besides being my good friend, he's also my boss, so Mike has to tread carefully with me around the other employees so everything looks fair with no favoritism between us.
Finishing my makeup and hair, I decide to ignore Kelsey. I feel a little hyper-sensitive right now so probably a little paranoid that everyone knows what Tyler did. I'm emotionally off definitely, I can tell by the way I even allowed Kelsey to get under my skin.
Checking the boards, I see I'm in the bar/lounge again, but this time Sheila is working it with me. Eventually trading off with Selena who worked the 1-6 she hugs me tightly and whispers to keep my chin up. And after a 20 minute overlap, she finally leaves demanding I call her later to let her know where I'm sleeping because she hasn't dropped the motel thing.
Watching Mike mix a drink I still feel a little awkward regarding last night, but I think we should be fine. Between him hearing me cry in the night and sleeping beside him I do feel weird though.
"Stop thinking so much, Saige," he grins like he’s reading my mind. "Nothing is different between us. We just had a slumber party. And if you crash at my place later you get to do my toenails tonight."
Laughing, I feel better instantly. "Sorry... But you're only the second guy I've ever slept with- oh! Not like that," I blush. "Oh, actually like that too," I laugh totally embarrassed.
"Well, I'm honored," he teases.
Laughing when Sheila walks up to us with a grimace and a pout I reach to help her quickly. Dabbing her shirt with club soda to get the dark line of ketchup off her, Mike takes her tray of dirty dishes to the kitchen. When she's significantly wet around her stomach, I laugh again and raise her apron higher on her stomach to hide the mess.
"You could never do this with your scrawny hips," she laughs lifting the apron a little higher to cover more of the mess across her stomach.
"It's not my hips that are the problem, it’s my short torso. If I raised my apron any higher, it would rest right under my boobs."
"It totally would," she bursts out laughing already in a better mode then when she pouted her way over to us. "There's a couple at 4 who asked for you," she head tilts over as I look.
Oh, shit... Dickhead. Pausing, all the air leaves my lungs and my discomfort is obvious to Sheila. When Keith waves and the woman across from him smiles at me like I know her, I'm totally confused.
"Do they need anything right now? Like could you walk over with me to refresh his coffee or som
ething?"
"Ah, sure. I was just going to pour him another. Why?" Sheila asks already straightening her spine beside me.
Turning my head so he can't read my lips I give her the quick facts. "He was a total handsy pig last night. But he left okay so I doubt he's here to cause a problem."
"Got it," she nods grabbing the coffee pot as we walk over.
When we approach, Keith immediately stands up. Stretching out his hand, he offers it to me with an embarrassed smile.
"Saige..." he smiles politely. "I didn't think you'd talk to me, but I should’ve known you would," he adds as we shake. Dropping his hand quickly he continues, "I'm here to apologize once more for my lewd, offensive behavior last night, and I'd like to introduce you to my sister Michelle," he says with a smirk.
"Hi, Saige!" Michelle, who looks close to my age smiles warmly. "My brother mentioned what a dickhead he was last night, so I thought I'd apologize as well. What you said to him was awesome," she grins, and I can't help my own. Nodding, Sheila is silent and Keith blushes deeper.
"Thank you, but it's not necessary. You apologized when you left."
"Well, my friends thought I should maybe say it again. Sober," he adds sheepishly. "I really am sorry for touching and scaring you. I was being obnoxious, and I'm not usually such a jerk when I drink. I promise you I won't be like that in the future."
"Or I'll send him back here so you can kick him in the ass again," Michelle laughs as I smile.
"Apology accepted. And thank you," I smile shaking his hand once more. "I'll leave you to Sheila now. I hope you enjoy your meals."
Walking away before he apologizes again, I round the bar to Mike just stepping behind from the other end. "I made sure he wasn't here to start shit when he came in."
"Thanks. He was good and his sister is super cute," I add.
"Yes, she is," Mike agrees looking over at her and for some unknown, unbelievable, completely inappropriate, totally irrational reason I feel a twinge of jealousy, or anger, or something ridiculous like that stir deep inside me.
Shocked by my own feelings, I look back over at Mike stocking the liquor shelves not looking at Michelle any more, but I still feel a weird possessiveness toward Mike.
What the hell is that? Maybe I'm just possessive because of what Tyler did. Maybe I'm being oversensitive and irrational? Oh god, I hope so. I don't think of Mike like that and I don't want to think of Mike like that. He's just my friend, and I need his friendship right now.
Watching a new group of 4 being brought in by Kelsey, I try to ignore my strange feelings for now.
Greeting my newest table, I play the part of happy friendly and continue on. Glancing over at Keith and Michelle from time to time, I notice him looking at me way too often which feels almost creepy. I also notice Michelle looking at me once in a while which feels different after the Mike comment. I don't want Keith to look at me or apologize, or really to acknowledge me at all. And I really wish Michelle was a little less cute suddenly.
By 8:00, both Sheila and I have our 6 tables seated, eating, or waiting for orders. There’s a 3 table wait, our hands are full, and the last 2 hours have absolutely flown by.
Standing beside the bar, I notice Michelle leave for the washroom and that's when I accidentally make eye contact again with Keith. Motioning for me to join him, I almost roll my eyes before acknowledging him but just catch myself. I get it, he's sorry. But this is a little overkill.
Deciding to get it over with, I motion one minute, wait to deliver my drinks to the table beside him and then fake smile as I turn to Keith.
"How was everything?"
"Delicious."
"Good," I nod. "Well, if there isn't anything else I'll have Sheila bring over your bill."
"I wanted to know if you'd have dinner with me?" Keith suddenly blurts out to my obvious shock. Shaking my head no before even speaking, he looks down quickly then back up to focus on my eyes again. "I haven't stopped thinking about you, Saige. And I talked to my sister and she thought you sounded great, and I knew you were great after I left last night," he says almost pleading with me.
"Keith-"
"Just dinner. I can't stop thinking about you, and I'd love to prove to you I'm not really an asshole."
Nearly flinching away from Keith, he has NO idea how much the thought of dinner with him repulses me. Not just because I think he's probably an ass every time he drinks, but more importantly because I still love Tyler.
Right or wrong, I love Tyler.
Not that I'll ever do anything about it with him, but the very thought of having dinner with another man feels like I'm cheating on Tyler somehow. Admittedly, it’s not the case, but I can't shut off my love for Tyler in only 2 days just because he shut off his love for me.
"I'm sorry, but no. Thank you for the offer. Have a good night," I throw in as I quickly spin around.
"You don't forgive me, huh?" Keith asks loudly.
Turning back I'm angry and annoyed and a little embarrassed when I see the man at the table beside us watching me listening. "Keith, I do forgive you. But I'm not interested. Have a good night," I say with just enough tone to end this conversation.
Walking back to the bar, I wait for my next table to finish browsing the menus and purposely busy myself away from Keith and his sister. After a few minutes I finally see in my peripheral Keith and his sister leave.
"Got a love note for you," Sheila grins handing me a business card of Keith's as I huff. Flipping it over I read, "I'll make you forgive me eventually... I'm very persistent. Have a good night."
"Persistent? Try obnoxious..." I mumble as Sheila laughs at my face of annoyance. Throwing out his card in the garbage under the bar, Sheila raises an eyebrow to me groaning, "Ugh. Never," as I turn for the kitchen.
Grabbing desserts I quickly realize Sheila must know what happened between me and Tyler otherwise she never would've questioned me keeping Keith's business card for even a moment. I've received hundreds of business cards before and no one ever questioned why I quickly threw them away when I was with Tyler. Sheila just did though, I realize feeling hurt and humiliated all over again.
By 11:00 the last table settles in for Sheila and I'm looking forward to my night ending. I may have slept like the dead last night but I'm still exhausted. My feet are killing me and the sadness I feel constantly thinking of Tyler keeps making me tear me up, which depresses me further.
God, I can't stop thinking about Tyler, wondering where he is, and what he's doing. Then just as quickly I think of who he's doing and I want to burst into tears again.
Like a mantra I tell myself I only have to get through 2 more hours and then I can cry. I only have one hour of service and one hour of cleaning. I have 2 hours before I lie to Mike and say I'm on my way to Selena's, and 2 hours until I lie-text Selena I'm crashing at Mike's.
I have only 2 hours until I can release all this upset from my chest because of Tyler.
*****
Rounding the bar again for table 3's last drinks, I just lift my head when I hear a deep voice I vaguely recognize.
"Hi, Saige," the intimidating guy from last night says and my reaction is immediate. Jumping as I spin around I almost lash out at him. Not because of him necessarily, but because I'm just fed up in general, I'm tired, and I'm not in the mood to make small talk with another man tonight.
"Hi." Acknowledging the other man I remember with a nod, I continue pouring the wine for table 3 and try to ignore them when Mike walks over to take their order.
Leaving the bar, I don't look back so I don't have to entertain them at all. I hate that they know my name, and I hate that they've returned presumably to talk to me since I've never seen them here before last night.
Tidying up the mess left by my last table, I scrub a little harder than usual. I'm not exactly sure why I feel irritated, but I do. Between the sadness, exhaustion, and irritation, once again I look at the clock and wish this night would end already.
After dumping the used dishes in
the kitchen, I have to pass the end of the bar again and that's when we make eye contact. Looking at intimidating guy, he smiles and tilts his head to motion me over to them.
Pausing for a moment I weigh my options on the bitchy front. I could blow him off but he was very kind to me last night- well, they all were after Keith left. He wished me well and even told me to go back inside where it was safe. Overall, he was a total gentleman, as was his friend.
Deciding I can handle a little small talk I walk to them but it's the attractive guy who speaks first. "We didn't get a chance to introduce ourselves last night. I'm Dan Ciccone and this is Malcolm MacNeil."
"Hello... officially," I smile politely before stalling out. I can't think of a single thing to say to these guys and that's usually not like me.
"Tell me lovely, Saige," intimidating man named Malcolm breathes in a delicious Scottish brogue, "Are ye a wee Scottish lass, or an Irish Miss?"
"Scottish," I smile. "Me mum's a MacTavish from Dundee," I say in my best Dundonian accent, not to be out-brogued by Malcolm.
"Aye," he grins. "Well ye certain’ly do the Scottish colorin’ prrrroud," he laughs rolling the 'r' in proud way longer than necessary which naturally makes me laugh as well.
"Thank you. If my round face and green eyes didn't give me away, my red hair certainly does," I smile as he nods. "Enjoy your drinks gentlemen. It was a pleasure meeting you both. An a fellow Scot no less," I finish in my mother's native accent.
Smiling to myself, I return to tidy tables next to Sheila while waiting for the last of our Diners to finish. It's nearly midnight, we're almost closed, and though I still feel all the Tyler sadness weighing on my soul, Malcolm did make me feel a little lighter with his teasing.