I had lost you! And now? I…find myself ecstatic one moment and confused the next. Could it…would it happen again?
Give me time. To see you, to have you hold me! Let’s be patient, move slowly. Let’s wait and see.
Love,
Gertie
Several weeks passed and another letter arrived from Gertie.
My dearest Bram,
I carry bad news. All agreed it should be me who tells you. Your mom has died. It was so sudden, my love. She was fine the night before. We had a wonderful dinner—Curpo and some of the old friends were there. After dinner she said she felt tired and went to bed. I stayed to help clean up everything in the morning. Bram, she went in her sleep. Peacefully. I didn’t know how to tell you this any other way. She loved you so much! And was so proud of you! There wasn’t a day that went by that she didn’t read your letters and show the newspaper articles to someone or tell them how brave and good you are.
Your mother was a simple woman who lived a simple life. She was strong for others more than for herself. She was devoted to your father, to you…to all of us.
She will be buried alongside Josef up on Grenchin Hill. Her gravesite will be the last. The iron gate will be closed, and only those who knew the deceased will be able to come and say their thoughts.
Oh! Bram, I wish I were there to hold you, to take away some of your pain. Her passing has awakened in me the realization of how short our time on the earth is. To be alone when there is someone whom you love more than anything else in this world there fox you, wanting you, is all that life is about!
Mom would have wanted us to be together. Everybody does, and so do I! I’m coming, my love, together we can share the loves and problems that life will bring.
Yours forever,
Gertie
Bram slept with Mo that night. He needed the companionship of a family member. Someone who was there for him, who had proven time and time again her devotion to him. He didn’t sleep head to head that night. He slept as a child curled up in her trunk. His tears were known only to her.
Bram shared with Kelly his sadness over the news of his mother’s death. The broad spectrum of contrast was difficult to experience. The joy and delight of Gertie and Curpo’s coming and the death of his mother. The yin and the yang at work once again. In the months to follow, his sorrow for his mother was replaced by remembrance; his longing for Gertie, by anticipation.
“Kelly! Gertie and Curpo are coming. Kelly! Kelly!”
Bram raced through the fairway chasing after Kelly, who was driving a loading tractor and couldn’t hear him. He ran around in front forcing Kelly to see him and stop.
“They’re coming! Gertie and Curpo! I just received a telegram!”
“Bram, that’s wonderful! When?”
“Soon! It just said they’re booking passage and will be here within the month! That’s all I know.”
Kelly had been worried about Bram—his depression, his lack of interest in anything but the new act. Gertie would be the one to snap him out of it.
Bram on occasion still met Sian under their tree. But it was becoming more difficult. Sometimes the light in the dream seemed to fade. Now that Gertie was coming, he knew he must let the dream go.
“Sian, my love,” he found himself saying out loud, “I must let you go. Our memories are everlasting. Sometime in the future perhaps we will meet again. I will never forget you!”
Bram felt she understood more than he did. She would have the knowledge to be content and know they both needed to move on. But it bothered him that he had promised they would always meet under the tree! And now he was breaking that promise! But, then why have the ability to promise? Are promises manmade? Maybe that’s the problem…
Dear Curpo,
My good friend, what will I do when we all die and I meet both Sian and Gertie in heaven?
Dear Bram,
Who says you’re going to heaven?
The train caravan rolled into New York City. Mr. North had decided to open the new season at world-famous Madison Square Garden!
For the last six months Bram had spent every waking moment working with Modoc. He had trained each evening in a special tent provided for him after the circus closed. An arena had been set up inside that had the same dimensions as the one in the main tent.
Everyone was curious about what the new act would be. Some of the roustabouts hung around. Circus people would come and go. A few trainers came in trying to learn the “secrets” of his training. But there were no secrets. There wasn’t one person capable of understanding, let alone learning what Mo and Bram’s communication was all about.
He loved to baffle many by whispering in her ear, or folding his hands in prayer and sitting cross-legged between her front legs. Sometimes the back ones! Many thought him a loony, others just let him be.
Bram asked that the calliope be left in his tent so he could use it in his new act. While he worked for the Wunderzircus he had learned enough to operate the automatic so he could start, rewind, and stop it. When the calliope was in the tent, he closed the tent flaps and asked that no one enter so as not to disturb Mo’s concentration. Then he would turn it low and work into the night.
Long ago Bram had conceived the performance. It was based on what his father had told him—about an elephant doing an act without a trainer. That would be something to make Modoc outstanding! He now had to create a performance that no other elephant had ever done. He wanted not only the audience to be impressed, but Mr. North and the circus people, too. It would be spectacular. It would be something that people would talk about for years. And he knew if he could just think of something, Modoc could do it! She was so smart. And then one night when he was thinking on his way back to his trailer, it came to him. It wasn’t Modoc’s size that impressed people, or even her personality—it was her heroics and her refusal to give up. It was the fact that they had survived a ferocious typhoon at sea, had many adventures in India, and had crossed on foot into the teak forest to pass a test in less than a month that it took many elephants years to do. It was the fact that together they had won the hearts of a people who allowed them into their village and led their own elephants to war, and their bravery that had saved many. That’s what impressed them. But Bram knew all that was because Modoc was special—she could act on her own. It was her intelligence.
So he concentrated on Modoc’s ability to think for herself. He wanted the public to appreciate her intelligence, to learn that animals can think for themselves. He felt it was just as important how she did the performance as the performance itself.
He wanted to share with the world that animals weren’t “dumb,” that they could reason, that a power of choice wasn’t just for the humans. And he thought of the perfect way to do it—he would have Modoc do an entire performance without him in the ring.
It would require her to think for herself and to remember each and every command. Now, that was something that had never been done before—with any animal! For her to be out there on her own with no commands, to remember—that would be spectacular. It was Bram’s way of giving the world a new way to look at all animals. To bring them to a new dimension in the eyes of the people.
Mo was ready. Ready to learn. To please Bram and to use her ability to understand what he wanted.
First Bram established a series of behaviors that had not been performed before. Then he taught Mo each one. He played the calliope while she was doing the behaviors. Each time he had Mo do a behavior, he would play a corresponding note. The music became the trainer, not the man.
The months passed. Mr. North had given Bram a date to have the new act ready. The grand opening. The new season. Not just Bram, the whole circus had to be ready. All the performers had been working hard on their own acts all winter, and now the moment was at hand.
The morning of the big day. The newspapers and radio stations had been sending out commercials, free tickets had been offered, clowns were sent into many schools to entice the children to ask
their parents to bring them. A parade of elephants, fancy horses, and clowns celebrated the coming of the circus down New York’s main street—all to lure people to come!
The circus’s public relations department had done a great job promoting Modoc, and now the time had come to produce.
New York was waiting for Modoc and Bram, Modoc and Bram were ready for New York, and the show was about to go on!
34
THE LINES AT THE TICKET BOOTH stretched down the block leading to the arena. This was opening day of the circus, the most important day of the year. And a sunny day it was. The sky was clear, the warm spring weather had brought an overflowing crowd—lovers of the circus, of the big top…and of Modoc. In the year that she had been at the circus, she had brought the attention of many.
Mr. North, whether for the prestige, or because of a side of him most didn’t know, gave the proceeds of the day to a charity group. In this case, the money was to go to the children’s ward at a local hospital.
This was also the time when all the new acts were to be presented. The press box would be full of reporters from every newspaper and radio station across the country. In one day a performer or trainer could be in the big top with a major act or out of a job.
Bram was as nervous as can be. He polished Mo’s ivory and the golden tips over and over again. She had been scrubbed clean and oiled to give her skin a warm, soft texture. Her toenails had been trimmed and buffed. One thing Bram wouldn’t them let do was put red polish on them! It just wasn’t Mo!
Her red and gold blanket and headpiece were cleaned and brushed. Mo was ready, Bram wasn’t. What if something happened? If Mo tripped or missed a cue, something…? He could lose her! Mr. North had a matching outfit of red and gold made for Bram. For the first time, Bram felt he was somebody. He could be proud!
Bram peeked through the curtain. The crowd was enormous, and tension in the arena was at a high level. Many of Bram’s friends came by to wish him good luck. Some told him to “break a leg,” which he understood meant good luck, he just didn’t know why.
“Ladies and gentlemen! Children from around the world! Welcome to Madison Square Garden! We proudly present the North Circus as it opens its spring season.”
The drone of the ringmaster echoed through the big top. A hush fell over the crowd.
“I wanted to wish you and Modoc good luck,” said a voice from behind.
Bram turned to find Mr. North standing there. He put out his hand for a handshake, the first he had ever offered to Bram!
“Thank you sir, I…we’ll do our best.”
Mr. North walked on, leaving Bram more nervous than ever.
For the next hour and a half the show went on, act after act, the acrobats, the High Flying Zifferonis, the clowns, the full herd of elephants stretching all the way across the arena. Some performers missed their cues, others performed beautifully.
Bram and Mo’s act was due to open the second half of the show, just after intermission. The half-hour of people racing back and forth getting soft drinks, popcorn, candy, hot dogs, all anxious to see the second half, seemed like an eternity to Bram.
And then:
“Ladies and gentlemen, children from around the world,” blasted the ringmaster. “The North Circus, under the personal guidance of Mr. North, brings you a one of a kind, first of a kind performance. One that has never been done before!”
You could hear a pin drop. No rattle of popcorn bags, no chairs scraping, no talking.
“You are about to witness a unique solo performance by an elephant—without a trainer! I repeat, no trainer! There has never been an animal known that has ever done it—except our one and only—our Golden Elephant—MODOC, and her friend and trainer, Bram Gunter!”
The applause from the audience was deafening! Bram and Modoc were waiting just behind the curtain. Bram was not surprised that North’s racial attitude was reflected in the announcer’s saying his name incorrectly.
This was the big moment he and Modoc had been waiting for! He leaned over and whispered in her ear, “This is for Papa, Mosie. And Mama.”
The music started. They waited for just the briefest of seconds. The curtains parted. Modoc put up her trunk as Bram uttered, “Move up, Mo!”
Two spotlights, a blue and a white, followed as he ran Modoc to the center ring. She lowered her head; Bram held both ears and planted a kiss on her forehead. The blue spotlight followed him out of the ring into a waiting blue velvet-covered chair, and as he sat in it, the spotlight faded to dark. The bright white spot on Modoc was the only light on.
The calliope started. Modoc took her cue and for the second time in history, an animal performed without a trainer! She bowed low, then threw herself into a sweeping motion of twirls, spins, loops, high leg steps, lie downs, trunk fantasia—all interspersed by sounds of trumpets, squeaks, rumbles, clicks, and bellows. This wasn’t an act—this was a blending of articulate movements gracefully performed with near-impossible positions and patterns woven throughout. This was a song and dance performance! An overhead microphone allowed the audience to hear every sound she uttered.
Bram sat still in his chair, barely aware that he was breathing as his mind moved to the same beats as Modoc. He was so proud of her now. She was actually doing it! He had known all along that she was magnificent, special—and there she was, proving it to the world. He could almost feel his father and mother, Sian, Kalli Gooma, and even Jagrat’s energy beside him, pulsing with the same pride. Everything the two had been through, everything they had taught each other and learned from each other—every exchange of love the two shared were coming together at this very moment in time. He could almost hear Modoc’s laughter and enjoyment as she danced to the music to please the crowd. No terrifying ocean typhoons, no guns firing at her, no thieves trying to steal her from her beloved Bram, nothing but the happy energy from the people in the bleachers. This was magical, and everyone was caught in the luminous net of the moment. All came together smoothly on the beat, gracefully, as she ended in a sweeping bow. The light slowly faded to dark and at the last second a small but intimate “chirp” was heard—and the spotlight went out!
There was a long moment of silence, then the spotlights came on. The white on Modoc, the blue on Bram, and as he raced down from the platform, a thunderous applause went up! Bram gave Mo a big hug. Only he could hear her belly rumble.
She raised her front leg, Bram hopped up and slowly she raised him till he could jump to her back. A wave of his hand, a trumpet from Mo, as they exited the ring.
Bram headed her to the press box, a customary gesture to the dignitaries as well as the press. As Modoc bowed to them, he heard a familiar voice screaming above all the others. He looked up. There, standing cheering, applauding with the others, were Gertie and Curpo!
Bram wanted to jump off Modoc and run to them but instead waved and threw a big kiss.
Curpo almost fell off the seat he was standing on. Gertie was jumping and clapping her hands, yelling, “Bram! Bram!” She mouthed the words: “I love you!”
As Bram and Modoc passed the crowd on the way to the backstage curtain, the audience rose and gave them a standing ovation, standing until the curtain closed. This was the highest form of compliment they could give. Bram was off Modoc, leading her to the exit door as they came through.
“Bram! Bram!” screamed Gertie as she jumped into his arms. Bram caught her in midair, hugging, kissing his girl, his one and only…his Gertie! They hugged and kissed, feeling the moment, the pain of caring. Both had tears in their eyes. Bram felt someone holding his leg.
“Curpo! Curpo!”
He fell to his knees, embracing his friend, kissing him on the cheek.
“Blech! ’ave ya gone bloody wacky, now? I tell ya, is this a way to greet a gentleman? Get off your knees, it’s embarrassing!”
Modoc was dancing, trumpeting, and squeaking her “what about me?” body action. Both Gertie and Curpo hugged and kissed her. She wrapped her trunk around Gertie as she did
to Bram and belly-rumbled.
“We love you, Mo!” cried Gertie.
Mo picked up Curpo and opened her mouth as though to eat him!
“I’ve missed ya too, ya big moosh!”
Gertie whispered in Mo’s ear, “Thanks for bringing him back home to me.”
The three sat in the trailer and talked late into the night. A knock came at the door. It was Mr. North.
“Bram, my boy, you did it,” he said. “I’m proud of you. I’ll show my appreciation in the morning.”
He tipped his hat to Gertie, ignoring Curpo completely, and disappeared in the dark.
It was two in the morning before Curpo left. Gertie and Bram talked for hours of the many things that had happened in the years they were apart. Bram noticed that the girl he had once known had blossomed into a beautiful and intelligent woman. Their young love had matured.
Morning brought a new large trailer, a bonus check, a pay raise, and a box of candy for Gertie.
In the months to follow Gertie accepted a job offered by Mr. North to work with the equestrian act, a beautiful set of four matched palominos that did an exciting performance with four blond ladies. It wasn’t long before she was asked to take charge of it all, scheduling, costumes, training programs, everything. The people loved her, and she, having been brought up on a farm, was knowledgeable about all aspects of caring for horses.
Curpo turned down an offer to work in the sideshow as the World’s Smallest Man. “It was a put-down, it was. The man…what’s ’is name? North…knew I’d say no before he asked! He feels all the people here are beneath him!” Curpo had to laugh at his own bad choice of words.
Bram intervened. He talked to Mr. North.