CHAPTER IV
MONI CAN NO LONGER SING
On the following morning Moni came up the path to the Bath House, justas silent and cast down as the evening before. He brought out thelandlord's goats quietly and went on upwards, but he sang not a note,nor did he give a yodel up into the air; he let his head hang and lookedas if he were afraid of something; now and then he looked aroundtimidly, as if some one were coming after him to question him.
Moni could no longer be merry; he didn't know himself exactly why. Hewanted to be glad that he had saved Maeggerli, and sing, but he couldn'texpress it. To-day the sky was covered with clouds, and Moni thoughtwhen the sun came out it would be different and he could be happy again.
When he reached the top, it began to rain quite hard. He took refugeunder the Rain-rock, for it soon poured in streams from the sky.
The goats came, too, and placed themselves here and there under therock. The aristocratic Blackie immediately wanted to protect herbeautiful shiny coat and crept in under the rock before Moni did. Shewas now standing behind Moni and looking out from her comfortablecorner into the pouring rain. Maeggerli was standing in front of itsprotector under the projecting rock and gently rubbed its little headagainst his knee; then it looked up at him in surprise, because Monidid not say a word, and it was not accustomed to that. Moni satthoughtfully, leaning on his staff, for in such weather he always keptit in his hand, to keep himself from slipping on the steep places,for on such days he wore shoes. Now, as he sat for hours under theRain-rock, he had plenty of time for reflection.
Moni thought over what he had promised Joergli, and it seemed to him thatif Joergli had taken something, he was practically doing the same thinghimself, because Joergli had promised to give him something or dosomething for him. He had surely done what was wrong, and the dear Lordwas now against him. This he felt in his heart, and it was right that itwas dark and rainy and that he was hidden under the rock, for he wouldnot even have dared look up into the blue sky, as usual.
But there were still other things that Moni had to think about. IfMaeggerli should fall down over a steep precipice again, and he wantedto get it, the dear Lord would no longer protect him, and he no longerdared to pray to Him about it and call upon Him, and so had no moresafety; and if then he should slip and fall down with Maeggerli deep overthe jagged, rocks, and both of them should lie all torn and maimed! Oh,no, he said with anguish in his heart, that must not happen anyway; hemust manage to be able to pray again and come to the dear Lord witheverything that weighed on his heart; then he could be happy again, thathe felt sure of. Moni would throw off the weight that oppressed him, hewould go and tell the landlord everything--But then? Then Joergli wouldnot persuade his father, and the landlord would slaughter Maeggerli. Oh,no! Oh, no! he couldn't bear that, and he said: "No, I will not do it!I will say nothing!" But he did not feel satisfied, and the weight onhis heart grew heavier and heavier. Thus Moni's whole day passed.
He started home at evening as silent as he had come in the morning. Whenhe found Paula standing near the Bath House, and she sprang quicklyacross to the goat-shed and asked sympathetically: "Moni, what is thematter? Why don't you sing any more?" he turned shyly away and said:
"I can't," and as quickly as possible made off with his goats.
Paula said to her aunt above: "If I only knew what was the matter withthe goat-boy! He is quite changed. You wouldn't know him. If he wouldonly sing again!"
"It must be the frightful rain which has silenced the boy so!" remarkedthe aunt.
"Everything all comes together; let us go home, Aunt," begged Paula,"there is no more pleasure here. First I lost my beautiful cross, and itcan't be found; then comes this endless rain, and now we can't ever hearthe merry goat-boy any more. Let us go away!"
"The cure must be finished, or it will do no good," explained the aunt.
It was also dark and gray on the following day, and the rain poured downwithout ceasing. Moni spent the day exactly like the one before. He satunder the rock and his thoughts went restlessly round in a circle, forwhen he decided: "Now, I will go and confess the wrong, so that I shalldare to look up to the dear Lord again," then he saw the little kidunder the knife before him and it all began over again in his mind fromthe beginning; so that with thinking and brooding, and the weight hecarried, he was very tired by night, and crept home in the streamingrain as if he didn't notice it at all.
By the Bath House below the landlord was standing in the back doorwayand called to Moni: "Come in with them. They are wet enough! Why, youare crawling down the mountain like a snail! I wonder what is the matterwith you!"
The landlord had never been so unfriendly before. On the contrary hehad always made the most friendly remarks to the merry goat-boy. ButMoni's changed appearance did not please him, and besides he was in aworse humor than usual because Fraeulein Paula had just complained to himabout her loss and assured him that the valuable cross could only havebeen lost in the house or directly in front of the house-door. She hadonly stepped out on that day towards evening, to hear the goat-boy singon his way home. To have it said that it was possible for such a costlything to be lost in his house, beyond recovery, made him very cross. Theday before he had called together the whole staff of servants, examinedand threatened them, and finally offered a reward to the finder. Thewhole house was in an uproar over the lost ornament.
When Moni with his goats passed by the front of the house, Paula wasstanding there. She had been waiting for him, for she wondered verymuch whether he would ever sing any more or be merry. As he now creptby, she called:
"Moni! Moni! Are you really the same goat-boy who used to sing frommorning till night:
"'And so blue is the sky there My joy can't be told'?"
Moni heard the words very well; he gave no answer, but they made a greatimpression on him. Oh, how different it really was from the time whenhe could sing all day long and he felt exactly as he sang. Oh, if itcould only be like that again!
Again Moni climbed up the mountain, silent and sad and without singing.The rain had now ceased, but thick fog hung around on the mountains,and the sky was still full of dark clouds. Moni again sat under therock and battled with his thoughts. About noon the sky began to clear;it grew brighter and brighter. Moni came out of his cave and lookedaround. The goats once more sprang gayly here and there, and the littlekid was quite frolicsome from delight at the returning sun and made themerriest leaps.
Moni stood on the Pulpit-rock and saw how it was growing brighter andmore beautiful below in the valley and above over the mountains beyond.Now the clouds scattered and the lovely light blue sky looked down socheerfully that it seemed to Moni as if the dear Lord were looking outof the bright blue at him, and suddenly it became quite clear in hisheart what he ought to do. He could not carry the wrong around with himany more; he must throw it off. Then Moni seized the little kid, thatwas jumping about him, took it in his arms and said tenderly: "Oh,Maeggerli, you poor Maeggerli! I have certainly done what I could, but itis wrong, and that must not be done. Oh, if only you didn't have to die!I can't bear it!"
And Moni began to cry so hard, that he could no longer speak, and thekid bleated pitifully and crept far under his arm, as if it wanted tocling to him and be protected. Then Moni lifted the little goat on hisshoulders, saying:
"Come, Maeggerli, I will carry you home once more to-day. Perhaps I can'tcarry you much longer."
When the flock came down to the Bath House, Paula was again standing onthe watch. Moni put the young goat with the black one in the shed, andinstead of going on farther, he came toward the young lady and was goingpast her into the house. She stopped him.
"Still no singing, Moni? Where are you going with such a troubled face?"
"I have to tell about something," replied Moni, without lifting his eyes.
"Tell about something? What is it? Can't I know?"
"I must tell the landlord. Something has been found."
"Found? What is it? I have lost something, a be
autiful cross."
"Yes, that is just what it is."
"What do you say?" exclaimed Paula, in the greatest surprise. "Is it across with sparkling stones?"
"Yes, exactly that."
"What have you done with it, Moni? Give it to me. Did you find it?"
"No, Joergli from Kueblis found it."
Then Paula wanted to know who he was and where he lived, and to sendsome one to Kueblis at once to get the cross.
"I will go as fast as I can, and if he still has it I will bring it toyou," said Moni.
"If he still has it?" said Paula. "Why shouldn't he still have it? Andhow do you know all about it, Moni? When did he find it, and how did youhear about it?"
Moni looked on the ground. He didn't dare say how it had all comeabout, and how he had helped to conceal the discovery until he couldno longer bear it.
But Paula was very kind to Moni. She took him aside, sat down on thetrunk of a tree, beside him, and said with the greatest friendliness:
"Come, tell me all about how it happened, Moni, for I want so much toknow everything from you."
Then Moni gained confidence and began to relate the whole story, andtold her every word of his struggle about Maeggerli and how he had lostall happiness and dared no longer look up to the dear Lord, and howto-day he couldn't bear it any longer.
Then Paula talked with him very kindly and said he should have comeimmediately and told everything, and it was right that he had told herall now so frankly, and that he would not regret it. Then she said hecould promise Joergli ten francs, as soon as she had the cross in herhands again.
"Ten francs!" repeated Moni, full of astonishment, for he knew howJoergli would have sold it for much less. Then Moni rose and said hewould go right away that very day to Kueblis, and if he got the crosshe would bring it with him early the next morning. He ran along andwas once more able to leap and jump, for he had a much lighter heartand the heavy burden no longer weighed him down to the ground.
When he reached home, he only put his goats in, told his grandmother hehad an errand to do, and ran at once down to Kueblis. He found Joergli athome and told him without delay what he had done. At first the boy wasvery angry, but when he considered that all was known, he took out thecross and asked:
"Will she give me anything for it?"
"Yes, and now you can see, Joergli," said Moni, indignantly, "how bybeing honorable you will receive ten francs, and by being deceitfulonly four: the ten francs you are going to have now."
Joergli was very much amazed. He regretted that he had not goneimmediately with the cross to the Bath House, after he had picked it upin front of the door, for now he had not a clear conscience and it mighthave been so different! But now it was too late. He gave the cross toMoni, who hastened home with it, for it had already grown quite dark.