This…I didn’t expect sex to be so much fun with Blake.
“Why are your jeans still on?”
He looks down. “Help me get them off.”
I’m eager to help him with that and work his belt loose. Popping the button on his jeans is harder and working his zipper down impossible.
“It’s stuck.”
“No kidding. You might need to cut me out of them.” He sits up and then stands, working his pants off. I sit up and tease my fingers around the edge of his boxer-briefs. The sight of him turns my body to fire.
He takes my face between his hands, tilting my head back for a kiss. We fall back against the bed together. I work my hands into his underwear, dragging them down. He finally helps me kick them off. Then we’re warm skin on skin, parts rubbing against each other. It feels natural and wonderful and a little bit scary.
He’s so hard and heavy, almost dangerous against me. Will this hurt? He said he might have trouble with gentle. Was that all talk?
Will he tear me apart with all the feelings I’ve nailed down for so long, or will he tear me apart with pleasure?
His hand moves from the back of my neck to my shoulder, sliding the skinny strap down. His mouth follows his hand, placing gentle kisses along the way. The coolness of the air disappears under the wet warmth of his mouth over my nipple. A little bird-type cry escapes me, and he smiles against my skin.
The longing in the pit of my stomach isn’t new. But the tingles racing over my skin, the tightening of my breasts, the burning flush moving over my skin—I haven’t felt any of those things in a very long time.
His hand covers my other breast, his rough skin deliciously wicked against my softer skin. I can’t stop stroking my hands over his body. Down his back, up his sides. “Blake,” I whisper.
He lifts his head. The need in his eyes painfully clear. “Are you ready?”
I reach down, wrapping my hand around him. He inhales sharply and closes his eyes. Slowly, I slide my hand up and down his hard length, savoring the smooth skin. He keeps watching as I stare at every inch of his body. I stroke a little harder and he inhales sharply. “Stop, beautiful. Give me a second.”
I still my movements but don’t take my hands away. There’s nothing in this world that could make me stop touching him. He leans over, reaching for the nightstand, slides open the drawer and grabs a few items, scattering them on the top of the nightstand. I don’t even bother looking, because it doesn’t matter. I trust him and want everything he wants.
He rips into a condom, and I move my hands to his stomach while he slides it on.
“Was the hotel stocked with condoms, too?” I tease.
“No, while you were changing, I put some things away.”
“Ooh, what else did you bring?”
“You’ll see. Now, quiet.” He runs his hands up my body, stopping to pull the lace cups of my bra all the way down. I’m a little anxious about the stretch marks on the sides of my breasts, but he doesn’t seem to notice. Instead, he gently brushes his thumbs over my nipples, then lowers his head to suck one in his mouth. His beard softly scratches my skin, intensifying every nip and lick. Even though I’m watching every move he makes, I let out a startled gasp when his teeth gently graze over my sensitized nipple, and I shiver with pleasure. Cold air teases my skin as he moves to the other breast and teases me at the same pace.
Heat pulses between my legs, growing hotter with every touch. I want his hands all over me. I need him inside of me. But he seems content to tease and torture me. And from the seductive smirk he’s wearing, he knows what he’s doing to me and loves every minute of it.
“Blake, please.” I’m so excited. Ready to jump out of my skin. I try to guide him to me, but he brushes my hand away.
“Not yet.”
I groan and he chuckles. “I’m torturing myself too, you know.”
“Then fuck me.”
The tip of his cock deliberately grazes my wet skin and I arch my hips up. Almost there.
He pulls back. His face is a mixture of concentrated control and raw need.
“Stop teasing me.”
His fingers brush over my cheek and he stares into my eyes. “I’ve been waiting for this a long time, Heidi. I want to remember every second of our first time.”
My heart flutters and I reach up, pulling him down for a kiss. While he claims my mouth, his cock brushes against my entrance and I tilt my hips up. This time he doesn’t tease me. He slips in, not enough to quench my burning need, but oh, fuck does it feel good.
He breaks our kiss. Our eyes lock and he thrusts. Entering me with excruciating slowness. I need the extra time to relax and adjust to the size of him.
My eyes close, then open, I want to see every reaction on his face. My breath hitches. He’s so big, pulsing against me. I lift my legs, wrapping them around his hips. Letting him know I’m ready for anything he wants to unleash. His hands shift, gripping, pulling me closer as he shoves himself deeper inside me.
So good.
Incredible. Better than I ever imagined. Worth every second he’s made me wait.
“Blake.” It’s the only word that makes any sense. He pulls out, pushes in deeper. Our lips meet and he moves faster, pumping his hips against me, driving inside me harder and harder.
“Heidi.” His voice is rough, strained.
“More.”
“I’ll give you more. You feel so fucking good.”
“So do you.”
He leans down and presses a kiss to my lips. Next to me, his arms shake with the pressure of holding himself up and maybe holding himself back.
“Don’t hold back. I want you. Give me everything. I can take it.”
He silences me with a searing kiss, covering me with his body, wrapping his arms under me, holding me tight. When he lifts his mouth from mine, I’m breathless and panting. He sits up a little, hooking my legs over his arms, spreading me wide, thrusting into me even harder.
Soft oh, oh, oh noises pop out of me. Everything feels so good, I’m overwhelmed.
I’m so fucking close, but I don’t think she’s anywhere near where she needs to be. My hands slide under her ass, pulling her up, changing the angle. She moans and twists under me.
“Good?”
“Mmmhmm.”
“Are you close?”
“Feels good,” she answers without opening her eyes.
“That’s not what I asked.”
Her eyes snap open. “No. But—”
Fuck. My thrusts stall. I nip and kiss my way to her ear. “Tell me what you need.”
She bumps her hips up against me and lets out a frustrated little noise that almost makes me lose it completely. I count back from five. “I need you to not stop.”
Chuckling softly, I wrap my arms around her and roll us so she’s on top. “Sit up. Show me what you like.”
“Oh. Oh. Ow.”
I chuckle and she smacks my chest. “Figures you’re huge everywhere.” She takes a second to sink down, and I run my hands up her thighs to her hips. “You’re so fucking beautiful up there.”
Her face goes soft and she smiles. Her breasts are free from the skimpy top and she takes a second to slip her arms out of the slim straps. Somehow, leaving it on even though it’s not covering a damn thing, is dirtier, hotter than if she were completely naked.
My hands tighten on her hips, urging her to move. She gasps and moans. I tilt my head up so I can watch my cock disappear into her. Pretty soon, she’s grinding down on me hard. “That’s it. All the way,” I encourage.
“Oh. There. Fuck.” She clenches me so tight, I barely hang on. But I so badly want her to finish before I get off.
“You feel so good. You have no idea.”
She goes liquid at those words, moaning louder. Her eyes close and her head falls back.
“That’s it.”
Fuck, I’m buried so deep in her, I can’t hold on much longer. My fingers brush against her nipples and she lets out another moan, completel
y lost. I move my hands back to her hips, helping her movements. She rides me faster and faster, beautiful breasts bouncing. Breasts I want my mouth on. I sit up a little, changing the angle and she presses against me harder. I’m hitting her so deep and she keeps trying to get more. It’s fucking amazing.
“Fuck,” I pant through gritted teeth. “I’m really close, Heidi. But you feel so good. Don’t stop.”
She grunts in response, so tight and tense, ready to explode. So close. “Ah. Oh. Blake. There. There.”
“Thank fuck.” I grip her hips, holding her down on me tightly as she shudders through her orgasm. Her hips keep moving, grinding her pelvis against mine. “Fuck,” she whispers, drawing the word out until it’s unbelievably sexy coming from her lips.
I’m done. I’m pulsing inside her, groaning hard through my own orgasm. My hands squeeze her hips so tight I know I’ll leave marks, but I can’t let go. We’re both shaking, both orgasms blending together, so that I can’t tell if the flutters of pleasure racing over me are from her or me.
It takes several seconds for the pleasure to fade to where I can catch my breath or open my eyes. She slumps down over my chest, and I have enough of my brain left to wrap my arms around her. When I’m a little more with it, I graze my lips over her forehead and hold her tight, loving the way we’re still melding together.
She picks her head up and traces her finger over my mouth. “That was fucking amazing.”
“Yes, it was.”
Soft laughter eases out of her, contracting her muscles around me, making me groan. “Christ, I hope I can get it up again. We need to do that twenty more times.”
She gently rolls off me, curling up against my side. “I have faith in you.”
I turn and tap my finger against the tip of her nose. “Give me one second.”
My legs barely carry me into the bathroom to dispose of the condom and clean myself up.
When I return, she’s stripped off the lacy top that had barely been hanging on anyway. She’s lying on her side, facing me, head propped up on her hand.
I stop dead so I can stare at every bare inch of her. “Do you have any idea how sexy you are?”
She extends her hand, inviting me to join her. “No. Come show me.”
Much, much later we’re wrapped up together the way I’ve always wanted to be with Heidi. Not just the naked, worn out from too much sex part, but the part where my arm’s holding her close and her head’s resting on my chest. It’s just us. Quiet. Peaceful. Her soft fingers absently trace feather-light hearts over my heart.
“Who was your first?”
Okay, that question was not a part of this fantasy.
“Why are you asking?”
Against me her shoulder jerks. “Just curious.”
“Heidi—”
Her fingers stop their tracing and tap my chest. “Come on. You know everything about me.”
I’m not sure if that’s true, but there’s no way I’m bringing up anything remotely related to her dead husband in this moment.
“Some girl from school I was friendly with,” I finally answer.
She picks her head up and stares at me. “Not a club girl?”
My whole body’s on alert. This conversation feels dangerously close to stomping through a minefield. “No.”
“How old were you?”
“Sixteen? I don’t know. She was tutoring me in English.” I tip my head down so I can see her better. “You realize you were eight then, right?”
“I know.” She’s quiet for a second and my entire body tenses, waiting to see what she says next. “How many others?”
Fuck me. I don’t want to answer that. This conversation is bound to tear open old wounds and here she is holding a saltshaker. “What are you asking? You want a number, Heidi?”
“I guess.”
My gaze runs over her face, but she’s calm. I try to think it through but keep coming up blank. She’s waiting with a curious expression, but her body’s relaxed against me. It’s the reason I answer such a dangerous question. Never mind that I can’t lie to Heidi any more than I can lie to myself. “I don’t know.”
She doesn’t snort in disgust, pull away, or judge me. I trace my finger over her lips. “It doesn’t matter. You’re my last.”
Her mouth turns up slightly and she kisses my hand. “Did you love any of them?”
That I can answer easily. “No.”
“Not one?”
“No.”
I hesitated that last time and she picks her head up again. “I won’t be mad. I thought this was what adults in new relationships do.”
Her earnest words make me chuckle, and I lean over to kiss the top of her head. “You want the truth? I only seriously cared about one—Trinity.” She opens her mouth to say something then closes it. “Not the way you think. You remember what a chubby, awkward kid I was?”
“No. I don’t remember you that way at all.”
The quick, honest way she says it is so sweet, I lean in and give her another kiss. “Thank you. But I always felt that way about myself. She was genuinely nice to me. She helped me find my place in the club, encouraged me to run for Road Captain when they needed me. Besides your brother, she’s the only one I talked to about my mom dying.” She murmurs my name against my skin, and I squeeze her a little tighter. “But as far as wanna-marry, spend-my-life, have-children-with love, there’s only one. You.”
She rubs her leg against mine, sliding over me, shifting her body, so she’s lying on top of me. Her forehead touches mine for a second, then she plants a soft kiss on my lips. “Thank you for being honest.”
“I’ll never lie to you.”
“I know.”
“You’re part of me, so lying to you is lying to myself.”
She kisses me again, longer this time. One of her hands moves up, running through my hair. “I know. I feel the same way.”
That conversation wasn’t as icky as I thought it would be.
I’m not thrilled the man I plan to spend the rest of my life with has been with so many women he’s lost count.
But, it took a lot for him to be honest with me.
“You were my first love,” I whisper.
“I know.”
“You were the first to break my heart, too.”
“I never meant to.”
“Are you mad I didn’t wait for you? That you weren’t my first?”
“No.” He traces his fingers over my cheek. “I could never be mad at you for anything, Heidi. I may not have been your first, but I’ll be your last.”
Waking up next to Blake makes me happier than I ever imagined. I have time to study the ink on his chest and arms. But, because I can’t help touching, I end up waking him.
“What’re you doing?”
“Memorizing every inch of you.”
“Hmm, I like that.” He leans over to kiss my forehead. We’re quiet together, touching each other. Tracing our fingers over every inch of one another as if we’re both trying to commit every plane and angle to memory.
He brushes his finger down between my breasts, settling his hand on my belly.
“Do you think Alexa’d like a little brother or sister?” he asks, breaking our silence.
Two kids before twenty? But there’s a skip in my heart, a flutter in my belly, at the thought of having a child with Blake. But, the question also unnerves me for reasons that leave me unsettled and defensive. “I don’t know. Why, you feeling like you need to have your own kid with me?”
“No.” He rolls us so he’s on top of me but holds himself up so he can stare at my face. “I’ll never lie to her about who her father is, but she’s mine, Heidi. She’s mine as much as any other kids we’ll have.” Every word is full of such fierce passion, I regret my words. He’s been good to Alexa since day one, and I don’t doubt him for a second. He rolls back to his side of the bed and stares at the ceiling. “I just thought maybe it’d be nicer to have them closer in age or something. I don’t know.”
>
“Okay,” I whisper.
He turns his head. Guess he wasn’t expecting that answer.
“Yeah?”
“Well, not right this second.”
“No. You need to finish school. And I need to get busy building us a house.”
“Really?”
“Fuck, yeah.”
“How many bedrooms is this house going to have?”
The corner of his mouth pulls up into a devilish smile. “How many do you want it to have?”
“I hope if we have daughters they have your red hair.”
“Why, so they can get teased in school?”
“As if you’d ever let anyone pick on your kid.”
“True.” He reaches over to the nightstand and I fake-groan.
“I don’t think my pussy can take any more, Blake.”
He laughs so hard, shaking the bed as he keeps reaching for whatever he wants. I tilt my head but just end up with my nose in his armpit.
“What are you doing?” he asks and I nip him. “Ow. I was going to give you something. Now I don’t know if you deserve it.”
“More orgasms? Because I definitely think I’ve earned them.”
He slips his hand between my legs, gently stroking. “Thought you couldn’t take any more?” His thumb brushes over my clit and my head falls back against the bed.
“Oh, fuck,” I murmur. “I was so, so wrong.”
A shudder ripples through my body and my back arches. Blake’s hot, wet mouth closes over one nipple, while he pushes a finger inside me. My eyes pop open and his eyes burn into mine while he lazily pumps his finger in and out. I roll my hips against his hand, and he lets out a harsh breath.
“That’s good. Do that again, beautiful,” he demands.
Lifting my arms over my head, I brace my hands on the headboard and roll my hips again.
“Fuck, that’s hot.”
One finger becomes two inside me.
“Open your eyes, Heidi,” he commands in a rough voice. “Watch.”
My first thought is no. I don’t want to look. But as my hips rock against him faster, I’m curious. My gaze slides down, watching his fingers reappear, shiny and slick from me. I watch as he slides them inside me and brushes his thumb over my clit. My hips buck harder against his hand and my orgasm sweeps over me. Before I can scream, his mouth covers mine, sucking down all the moans and cries that rush out.