Chapter 2
Ahmad Franklin Jacobs, Jr.
“So what, man? You think just ‘cause your black ass is gonna be ballin’ at Georgetown University, you can’t hang with us?”
When my homeboys made statements like that, it made me regret my decision to tell them the good news of my scholarship to play basketball at Georgetown. I thought it was a big deal and hoped they would be happy for me. Instead, whenever I had to do anything else besides hanging out on the neighborhood court with them, they would always throw college in my face.
“That don’t make you better than us, homie.”
“I ain’t tryin’ to be better than y’all; I just got things to do. Know what I’m sayin’?”
It didn’t matter what I said or how many times I said it, my boys were going to walk away spewing the same ignorant ass bullshit.
“Man, you changin’.”
I knew I couldn’t dwell on how they felt or even do anything about it. I had more important things to think about. I was going to play ball for Georgetown University. I had to make the most of this opportunity. Playing ball was all I had wanted to do all of my life. Like most athletes, I started playing on the streets using milk crates as goals and shooting with old beat up balls. In Junior high school, I began to hone my skills and navigating on a much better court. A real floor with a real ball. My mother almost flipped her wig when the coach from Xavier Prep in Manhattan began calling and coming to the house, trying to recruit me to play for their team.
“Mrs. Jacobs, I feel that Ahmad has a real future in basketball. Xavier’s exemplary academic program, along with our outstanding athletic department, can really help him develop into something special. Not to mention the fact that if he maintains good grades, Ahmad could get accepted and play ball for one of the top colleges in the country.”
The coach was right. I worked extra hard in high school to keep a decent G.P.A. and even harder at playing great ball. Xavier Prep was the state basketball champion for three of my four years there. When the opportunity came for me to play basketball for Georgetown University on a full scholarship, I was in the right position to grab it.
My mom worked full time for a dry cleaner and there was no way in hell she would be able to afford to send me to a private school like Xavier Prep or to Georgetown University. The child support payments she received about once every three or four months from my father were barely enough to pay for subway fare for one let alone feed four growing children. My father came around every now and then because he said that he wanted his kids to “know their father.” That was bullshit and I knew it. I was the oldest and had heard more of it than my siblings. He really came around for an occasional free hot meal and some needy pussy. My mom was always glad to see his broke ass and was more than willing to let him hit her sweet spot. Always true to form, he was gone again before the sun came up the next day. I begged my mother to leave this fool alone but she never listened. The subject of my father was an extremely sore spot for the two of us.
“Ma, we don’t need him for shit.”
“You watch your mouth, Ahmad,” she would yell in her deep Jamaican accent.
“I mean it, Ma. He ain’t worth shit. You let him bounce around here and play daddy for a minute, fuck you and leave. Then what? Huh? You’re right back where you were. Working like a goddamn dog and depressed as hell.”
“Ahmad! I’m gonna slap the shit out of you if you don’t watch your goddamn mouth. Now, I am still your mother and I pay the bills all up and through here. I’ll have whoever the fuck I want up in this piece.”
“Ma, I can get a job and help out. You don’t have to kill yourself like this. Please, let me help you,” I softly begged.
“Ahmad, you need to be concentrating on school right now. Not working. I appreciate you wanting to help but baby, I got this. I don’t want nothing and nobody coming between you and your education. You’re going to college.” She reached out and grabbed my hand. “Anyway, your daddy is doing the best he can and I still love him.”
“You know what, Ma? Whatever,” I said as I threw up my hand in her face.
I was glad that I would be leaving for DC soon and would not have to put up with this shit. My sisters and brothers, on the other hand, were not so lucky. They would have to continue to watch this bullshit drama from time to time. I didn’t mean to be disrespectful to my mother, I just wanted better for her. That’s all.
But, I couldn’t worry about that right now. The list of things to do before I left for Georgetown was more than ten miles long. There was a lot of farewell pussy to get before I left town and I planned to take all that I could get my hands on. I also had to say tearful goodbyes to a lot of special people in my life. My grandmother made sure I had plenty of her bear hugs and sweet potato pie before I left town.
“Don’t forget about the old lady,” she said.
The main person that was going to be the hardest to leave was my girl, Corrie. She had been visibly sad ever since the day she learned that I would be going away to school. The sparkle that had always been present in her chestnut brown eyes was now gone.
“When will you be back?”
“Corrie, I promise to call you every day and to get home as much as I can to see you. When my team plays games nearby, you can come and watch me play. Wouldn’t you like that?” I asked, trying to make her feel better. It broke my heart to leave her behind. She was the main thing that kept me focused on my grades because I knew that if this basketball thing didn’t work out, I would need something solid to fall back on. I couldn’t let her down because, unlike most of the people in my life, Corrie really believed in me.
“Can I come to Washington to see you?”
“Well, maybe. I need to see how things are down there first.
I’ll let you know.”
I knew that what I was saying must have sounded to her like I was leaving her for good. I closed my eyes and savored the feeling of her soft skin as I stroked her delicate cheek. Man, I am going to miss holding you in my arms.
“Corrie, you know how much I love you, right?”
I pulled her warm body closer to me and inhaled her sweet scent.
“I love you, too, Daddy.”
Corrie Samantha Jacobs was born on my fifteenth birthday. At first, I wasn’t sure how I would feel about becoming a teenaged father until Corrie was born and I saw my own reflection in her little innocent face. I had fallen deeply in love with someone I’d just met. Corrie’s mom, Kim, and I only went out twice. We had sex on our second date and boom, Kim was pregnant. At first, I tried to pretend like there was no way the baby could be mine.
“Ahmad! You know that I was a virgin when we got together,” Kim tearfully argued.
“How do I know that?”
“Ahmad!”
She was right and I knew it. I’d been having sex since I was twelve years old and I could damn well tell when a girl was a virgin. But, being told that I was going to be a daddy scared the shit out of me. How was I going to support a baby? I didn’t have two nickels to rub together. My own father wasn’t around to set a good example and I was worried about the kind of father I’d be.
Since the day she was born, I made it my business to see Corrie every day. I didn’t have a lot of money to offer but I gave her all of my love and a great deal of my attention. I was determined not to mirror my father’s trifling behavior. Even though Kim and I were no longer dating, I was still going to be there for my little princess. And that’s exactly the way I treated her each time we were together…like a princess. Luckily, Corrie’s mom and grandma were cool and not a couple of bitter, money hungry bitches. They allowed me to come by and see her whenever I wanted. Even when I was broke, which was most of the time. Sometimes, Mrs. Agnew would bring Corrie to basketball games in the city so she could watch her daddy play. I would take her for play dates in the park or for weekends at home whenever my mom had the time to help out. Corrie was the one person in the world that I knew I just couldn’t let down
.
Georgetown was going to be the beginning of my plan to make a better life for her. I had a lot of work to do.