Layna, thank you for being in my life. I can’t begin to tell you how much you mean to me. I cherish every memory we’ve shared together.
Now that I’m gone, it’s more important than ever that you and your mom look out for each other. Your mom acts very strong in front of others. But, I know her. She’ll lock herself in her room and fall apart alone. You have each other now, and you have to lean on one another. I want my two favorite girls to be happy and have a wonderful life. I’ve been lucky because I’ve had the best life I can ever hope for.
I’ve said this a million times, and I’ll say it again. I’m so proud of you. I can’t believe all that you’ve accomplished. Remember to follow all your dreams. Life is too short, baby. I want you to do all that your heart desires. My wish for you is that you find eternal happiness like I found in your mom.
Remember, if you ever need me, all you have to do is think of me. Even if you can’t see me, trust that I’m there, guiding you and lighting the way.
Be happy, my sweet baby girl.
Love you more than life itself,
Your daddy
Layna is crying so hard by now that I don’t know if the sound of the sobbing is from me or from her. I can barely catch my breath as I fall apart in front of everyone, even though I had promised that I wouldn’t. My dad walks up to Layna and brings her down. She drops to her knees in front of me and while we hold each other, we share the pain of losing the one man who has meant the world to us. With our bodies shaking from the sobs, we hold one another tightly, knowing that Chance would want us to pick up the pieces and move forward.
And although losing him is killing us right now, we know that we will eventually heal. We’ll heal together, with Chance guiding us each step of the way.
A full week later, I’m brave enough to read my own letter from Chance.
Hey you,
If you’re reading this, then let me start by saying I’m sorry. I don’t want to leave you, but I guess somebody with higher powers is saying, “Too bad.” I’m going to miss you so much. You’re my soul mate, Lily, and I will find you. One day, I’ll find you again.
Lily, you have completed me. Completed my life. I’ve thanked God every day for leading me to you. You’ve given me so much…taught me so much. Your love, your strength, your passion, your courage, your determination. And, you’ve given me Layna.
You need to know that I’ve got important flash drives in our safe. One has all of the information about our assets and all of our accounts. Even though I’m cutting out early on you, I’m at least reassured by the fact that financially, you both will be well taken care of for a long time.
The other flash drive has access to all of the research I’ve done. If Layna still decides to take that path in her career, please give it to her. She’s a brilliant girl. If anybody can finish what I started, it would be her.
Lily, I don’t want you to cry anymore. Remember, you “choose strength.” This is the time I need you to find that strength inside you and be a mother and father for Layna. I know you’re more than capable of that. She’s going to need you, especially right now.
I want you to be happy. Always keep that beautiful smile on your face.
I love you so much. I’ll always be with you, Lily. Always.
Until we meet again…
Yours eternally,
Chance
I wipe my tears with my unsteady hand. Sometimes true strength arises from our weakest point. Taking a deep breath, I choose strength once again.
Chapter Twenty-nine
I know I’m dying. Nobody knows my body better than me. Not my family, not any of the doctors. After catching a viral infection that eventually attacks my lungs, I end up with pneumonia. The doctors have tried everything. I’ve been in the ICU for over two weeks, connected to all sorts of tubes and the ventilator since I can’t breathe on my own.
Although I can’t open my eyes, I know what’s happening. My parents, who are now in their seventies, have not left my side. Kathy, along with my other friends, colleagues, personal helpers, and past therapists continue to visit. Layna has taken a leave from her medical school and has flown home. Just like her daddy, she has been attending Johns Hopkins School of Medicine. She has vowed to follow her father’s steps and is focusing her career in neurology. She’s been studying all of the research he left for her, committed to continue working on his findings.
Even as I lie there dying, a sense of pride fulfills me. My little girl, who is now twenty-three, has grown up to be a strong, confident woman who can accomplish anything her heart desires.
I can hear the beeping of the machines around me. I can hear the soft sobbing of my mom from the corner of the room. I can feel the occasional kisses on my forehead from my dad. Most of all, I can feel Layna holding my hand.
It’s not like I haven’t tried, but my body just isn’t strong enough to fight any longer. My family has always known my wishes. I don’t want to be hooked to any artificial means to stay alive. I’m well aware that they have discussed this and need to make some tough decisions. I only hope they remember all of my wishes.
“Mom, I love you.” I hear Layna whispering in my ear. “Thank you for always being my rock and inspiring me to be my best. Be at peace, Mom. Don’t worry about me. I’ll be okay.”
I smile to myself, knowing she’s going to be fine. My parents are still around, and she has a strong support group with her friends and colleagues. Kathy also has been like a second mom to Layna. Besides, she has her dad’s brains, charm, and looks. And, she has my courage. I’m not at all worried about her.
I try to squeeze her hand to let her know that I hear her. I have no idea if I’m successful, but I feel her squeeze my hand tighter.
I don’t fear death, for I have lived. I’ve lived a blissful life for fifty-six years. It hasn’t been easy. No, it hasn’t been easy.
But, I learned. Even with tears in my eyes, I managed to smile. Instead of worrying about my disabilities, I learned to live through my abilities. Instead of never trusting, I learned to bring down my walls for love. Instead of feeling like I wasn’t perfect, I learned that I was better because I was unique. I was me.
I finally understand the purpose of my existence. It’s not to be the next president or to change the world. I’ve lived a long, fulfilling life with people I’ve loved and who have loved me back. When there has been darkness, I’ve searched until I found a glimmer of light. I may not have changed the world, but I changed my world.
That night, I have a wonderful dream. I’m sitting in the middle of nowhere in my wheelchair. As I look around, I notice that I’m in my wheelchair in a meadow, surrounded by beautiful wildflowers. I can feel the soft breeze flowing through my hair, and I breathe in deeply the fresh, country scent.
There’s a song playing far away in the distance. I strain my ear to hear the music. It’s Perfect by Pink. I squint my eyes to see where the song is coming from. There’s a girl dancing—a lovely girl with long, curly, blonde hair. She’s dancing and singing the song at the top of her lungs. And, there’s a dog next to her. He’s barking and running around her.
“Come on, Lily. Come dance with me,” she yells.
“Layna?” I whisper. I can hear my voice, speaking clearly.
A figure is walking toward me. It’s a tall man with a strong build and a confident stride. I close my eyes. What’s happening?
“Hey, beautiful.”
I open my eyes to see Chance’s beautiful face next to mine. He looks like he did when I first met him. Just like back then, he looks young and healthy, and his eyes have that familiar twinkle. He’s kneeling in front of me.
Shocked, I reach forward with shaky hands to feel his face. This time, I don’t have to concentrate so hard to control my arm. I can actually touch him softly and tenderly.
He closes his eyes as I continue to explore him, trying to make some sort of sense.
“Chance? Is it really you? I thought I’d never see you again.” How am I talking
so clearly? And, my gorgeous husband is here, in front of me. Overwhelmed with emotion, my eyes fill with unshed tears.
“You can’t get rid of me that easily. Besides, I promised you I’d find you again.” Chance smiles and lovingly kisses my lips. “I’ve missed you,” he whispers. Taking my hand, he says, “Come on, somebody’s been waiting a long time to see you again.”
I try to drive my wheelchair, but it doesn’t move.
“You won’t need that here, Lily.” He pulls me up to stand with a gentle tug of my hand. I glance down, and I’m standing on my feet without anybody holding me up. Astonished, I look at Chance questioningly. Chance winks at me and encourages me to take a step.
As if it’s the most natural thing in the world, I step with my right foot and then the left.
Suddenly, the dog is right next to me, jumping up and down, wagging his tail. I scream in delight, “Duke!” He tackles me down and licks my face all over. “Duke, it’s really you!” I laugh because I can’t believe this amazing dream.
Pulling myself up, I glance ahead. Layna is laughing and still singing our song. “Well, come here, sis! We have so much to talk about.”
Moving one foot after another, I break out in a full sprint toward her with Chance and Duke running by my side.
About the Author
Jalpa Williby immigrated to the United States at the tender age of eight. Faced with many obstacles in the “new country,” Williby pushed herself to conquer all of the challenges. After graduating with a Bachelor’s of Science from the University of Illinois, Williby went on to earn Masters in Physical Therapy from Northwestern University. Her passion of helping her patients led her to a specialty in neuroscience, focusing on children and adults with neurological impairments.
Williby’s previously published novels, The Chaysing Trilogy, have won multiple awards and are Amazon best sellers. Chaysing Dreams and Chaysing Memories have been awarded gold medals from Readers’ Favorite International Book Awards in Romance Suspense category. Chaysing Destiny has earned multiple five star seals.
Williby now introduces My Perfect Imperfections in hopes to educate and inspire her readers.
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Author’s Note
First and foremost, I want to thank Amanda Walker and Angie Martin for their guidance and patience. You helped keep the vision alive for My Perfect Imperfections.
I must also recognize my family for once again being patient while I buried myself into my “literary world.”
My Perfect Imperfections is very dear to my heart. After years of working with my special needs friends, I can only hope that this book can do them justice. I especially want to thank all who interviewed for me to help me “get it right.” I so appreciate you entrusting me with your deepest thoughts, fears, and desires.
Lastly, I would be nothing without my readers. Thank you, thank you! If you enjoyed reading this story, I would love for you to leave a review on Amazon and/or Goodreads. Your support means the world to me.
You can keep up with latest news on my novels at http://jalpawilliby.com.
Jalpa Williby, My Perfect Imperfections
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