“Ordered it online the night we had pizza. I’ve been waiting for the perfect moment to break it out.”
“You would do that.”
“I like messing with you. But it’s all in good fun. You know that, right? I have fun with you, Chelsea.”
“The feeling is mutual…when you’re not scolding me,” I joked.
“Even when I’m scolding you, it’s for your own good.”
“I know.” I smiled.
As we sat down for the movie, Damien made himself comfortable on my couch, kicking his big feet up on the coffee table and laying his head back. I relaxed my body into my own side of the sofa, careful not to get too close.
Even though I’d always heard of this movie, I had no clue what it was about and was surprised to find it starred a young Drew Barrymore. The main character had the ability to start fires with her mind. It wasn’t my type of story at all, so I found myself daydreaming through a lot of it, sneaking glances at Damien as he ate his popcorn. He seemed into it. Was he serious? He appeared to be really enjoying this.
At one point, he turned and noticed me staring at him. “What’s the matter? You’re not into it?”
“This movie is not really my taste.”
“Why didn’t you say something?”
“You were taking too much pleasure in the whole idea of watching it. I didn’t want to hurt your feelings.”
He lowered the volume. “Want to watch something on Netflix instead? What do you feel like?”
I feel like making out with you.
God, that’s the only thing I feel like doing right now.
“It’s getting too late to start a new movie. It’s fine.”
“Well, I’m not keeping it on if you’re not into it.” He grabbed the remote and pressed stop.
It was suddenly quiet.
“Can I ask you something, Damien?”
“The answer is always yes, so stop prefacing everything with that question.”
“What was it exactly that you invented that allowed you to buy this building?”
“It was a type of headphone technology. Myself and a co-worker sold the patent for ten million.”
Say what?
“That is so amazing.”
“After taxes and divvying it up, it wasn’t that much money. I used my half to buy this building at auction and fix it up.”
“So, you invested all of it here.”
“Yup. And it pays off.”
“You were very smart to do that and not waste it.”
“I love that I can keep a few good people employed. That’s honestly the best part.”
“Murray had nothing but good things to say about you as a boss.”
“My job is easy. What you do at that youth center on a daily basis, shaping kids’ views of life and the world, opening their eyes to new things…that’s way harder than anything I’ve ever done.”
“It’s funny. There’s this teenage girl who’s been coming to me for relationship advice…me of all people.”
“Just tell her all the answers can be found in the unicorn,” he said, rolling his eyes facetiously.
That caused me to erupt in laughter. “I should have you go in and set her straight. Although, she might not care about Kai anymore once she became lost in your blue eyes as you were yelling at her to get over it.”
I immediately regretted the eyes comment. He simply smiled at me, looking like he didn’t know how to respond.
“Do I yell?” he asked.
“Only sometimes.”
We stayed making comfortable conversation on the couch for a while until he finally said, “Alright…so we’ve ruled out another movie?”
“Right. No movie. I think I’m gonna turn in.”
He lifted himself off of the couch. “That’s my cue, then.”
Damien bent down, ejecting the DVD from the player.
I walked him to the door. “Thank you for everything.”
He lingered before he said, “Your eyes ain’t so bad, either.”
I smiled and felt flush from the compliment.
He continued, “Your douchebag ex was right about one thing.”
“What?”
“You do blush every single damn time someone compliments you.” He paused. “Every single time.”
I was sure I was blushing even more when I said, “Goodnight.”
“Goodnight.”
CHAPTER NINE
PANDORA’S BOX
Rubbing my eyes, I said, “Seriously? They are extra loud today.”
Damien’s phone voice was way too bright and cheery for so early in the morning. “Why don’t you come have breakfast with us? If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em.”
“So, the only way I can get The Double Ds to stop barking is to come over there? Seriously, there has to be a better solution.”
“What could be better than breakfast with us? They miss you.”
“I seriously doubt that.”
Over the past several weeks, Damien and I had started to figure out that for some reason, the dogs stopped barking whenever I came over to complain in the morning. As soon as I’d return to my apartment, the barking would start up again. It was almost like they were messing with me.
“Come on, I’ll make you some coffee and eggs. If you want toast, you’ll have to bring the toaster oven.”
“I’ll toast some slices and bring them,” I said, throwing some clothes on with a smile on my face.
“We’ll skip the bacon.” He laughed.
“Um…yeah. No bacon, please.”
Damien had left his door cracked open and was emptying a frying pan full of scrambled eggs onto two plates when I let myself in.
Carrying a dish of toast, I said, “Look, they’re not even burned.”
“You must’ve not been reading and toasting.”
Dudley and Drewfus were circling around me, but as expected, they’d stopped barking with me here.
Hoping for some scraps, the animals sat by our feet as Damien and I ate at the kitchen table.
“It’s amazing how quiet they are now.”
Taking a bite of toast, he said, “They’re quiet when they’re content.”
“So, you’re saying they’re happier when I’m here?”
“Maybe they like having a female around when they wake up, or maybe they just sense something that other people don’t.”
“Like sense something about me?”
“You know how strong their sense of smell is.”
“Yes, I do.” I laughed. “Between your supersonic hearing and their sensitive noses, I’m pretty much screwed around here.
“Maybe they like the way you smell.”
“Are you saying I’m like a piece of smoked meat to them?”
“No. You smell better than bacon.”
“You’ve smelled me?”
“Yes.”
“What exactly do I smell like?”
“You smell really nice. It’s a sweet smell.”
“You’re bacon me paranoid.”
He chuckled. “Okay…so either they like your smell, or they just sense that you’re a friendly person, and they calm down when you’re around.”
Damien was giving me a funny look that prompted me to ask, “Are we talking about them or you?”
“Maybe both.”
My heart fluttered, and I wanted to stomp on it.
He broke up a piece of toast and threw the remnants on the ground. The dogs scurried to beat each other to it.
When Damien got up to pour more coffee, I said, “So, I’m going out with Brian Steinway again this weekend.”
He was stirring in sugar, and his hand stilled for a moment when I’d said it.
“I didn’t realize you were still seeing him. You hadn’t mentioned him in a while.”
Brian and I had only gone out a few times in a span of a month. While he didn’t give me the same butterflies Damien did, I’d yet to find a legitimate reason to stop casually dating him. We hadn’t done
more than kiss; that was mostly because of my own hesitation.
“Yeah…I figure why not? He’s nice enough.”
Damien slammed his mug down. “Nice enough?”
“Yes.”
“You do realize you just basically wrote him off, right? So why bother spending any more time with him if you’re not crazy about him?”
Because I need a distraction from you.
At the same time, I love being around you.
“What’s the harm in spending time with someone?”
“The harm is that while you’re passing the time, he’s getting more and more smitten with you. And I’m gonna have to kick him off the property when he becomes disgruntled.”
“I think you’re jumping too far ahead.”
“Okay. We’ll see about that. Anyway, you shouldn’t be wasting your time with him if he’s not exactly what you want.”
“You can’t always get what you want.” I was sure Damien had no clue that I was thinking of him when I’d said it. I thought I’d been doing a pretty good job of hiding my true feelings for him lately, going along with us just being friends. But if there was one thing I’d learned from this, it was that you can’t control your attraction to someone. If it’s there, it’s there. It can either be ignored or acted upon but not controlled. But I was grateful for Damien, even if things couldn’t progress past friendship. At the very least, he’d helped take the focus off of Elec.
“Where’s he taking you anyway?”
“Fondue.”
“At least he’ll be dipping his stick into something.”
“You are bad.”
“Did you tell him you like to be double-dipped?”
“Excuse me?”
“You know…two guys…double dipped.”
“I don’t like that at all…nor would I ever do it in real life.”
“I’m just messing with you.”
“You like to do that.”
“Double dip?”
“No! Mess with me.”
“I love it, Chels. Especially when you blush.”
“You’ve never called me Chels before.”
“Do you not like it?”
“Elec used to call me Chels, so no, I’m not really crazy about it.”
“Well, then we need to come up with a new nickname.”
“What?”
“I’ll think about it.” He grinned.
“Oh, boy.”
Damien rested his chin in his hand. “Any other names banned?”
“Leeches.”
“Leeches? Why would I call you leeches?”
“Elec used to like to scramble the letters of words, to make new words. He once figured out that if you scramble the letters of Chelsea, you get leaches. But then we both later realized that leeches is actually spelled with two E’s and no A, but the nickname stuck.”
“Hmm. Elec is not that bright. What do you get if you scramble the letters of dumb fuck?”
“Now you have me thinking about that.” I laughed.
“Bum fuck?” He chuckled. “No, wait…that’s missing the D. I can see how that shit would be addicting, though.”
“Bum fucking or anagrams?” I joked.
Damien spit out his coffee in laughter. “Yes and yes.”
Staring at Damien, I thought about how at the very least, I was grateful to have found a friend and protector in him.
“You’re a good egg, Damien. And you make good eggs, too.”
“My mother taught me how to make scrambled eggs fluffy but not runny.”
“How is your mother? You don’t talk about her much.”
“She’s alright. I’m due to visit her soon. Tyler and I have tried to get her to move closer to us. She’s about an hour from here down 101.”
“She doesn’t want to move?”
“She still lives in the house we grew up in. I think it would be hard for her to leave, since there are so many memories of my father there. She’s never really gotten over his death, hasn’t even dated anyone since he died.”
“That’s got to be hard.”
“We both keep telling her she needs to move on.”
“What does she say to that?”
“She says when you really love someone as much as she loved my dad, it’s irreplaceable. She says she’d rather just spend her time alone, trying to seek out and connect to his spiritual presence.”
“Wow. God, that makes me want to cry,” I said as a lone teardrop travelled down my cheek.
“You are crying.”
“Well, see? There you go.”
He reached over and swiped my teardrop. “Yeah. It’s pretty fucking sad to see her so depressed.”
“You know, it makes me wonder.”
“Wonder what?”
“Wonder if there are different levels of love.”
“I definitely think there are,” he said.
“I think the level of love that is irreplaceable is the highest level. I mean, even after Elec broke my heart, I never once felt that he was totally irreplaceable. But that could just be because he hurt me. I don’t know whether it would have been different if he’d died. And I mean…plenty of people remarry after loss. So, clearly, those people were able to move on.”
“Well, I wish Mom would move on, because that’s no way to live.”
“Yeah, but she can’t.”
“I know,” he whispered, swirling his coffee around mindlessly as he gazed into his mug.
“Anyway, I hope to meet her someday.”
“She’ll come visit at some point.”
“Why doesn’t she visit more often?”
“She doesn’t like to leave her dog by himself. She has a small terrier that’s scared of my dogs. Since I have Dudley and Drewfus every other weekend, it makes it tough to get them together.”
“That sucks.”
“Speaking of sucks, I have to figure out what to do with these monsters next week.”
“Why?”
“I have to go to Los Angeles.”
“What’s there?”
“Just some business I have to take care of. It’s too complicated to get into.”
Hmm.
“Oh.”
“Yeah, so Jenna obviously handles them at night, but I’m trying to figure out a situation for them in the mornings and during the day while she’s at work. They’re not the type of dogs that can be left alone all day.”
“I can watch them,” I offered.
What am I, crazy?
“Chelsea, I wasn’t hinting at that. I would never ask that of you. You’re sweet to even offer, but you and the dogs…not a smart combo.”
“Maybe…but I thought they supposedly liked me.”
“They do, but you’d have to pick up their shit and all that. We’re not talking about little pebbles, either.”
“Oh, I know. I’ve seen you cleaning up their turds.”
“Some days, if they eat the wrong crap, it’s like Montezuma’s revenge. Seriously, I couldn’t subject you to that if you’re the least bit queasy.”
“I can totally handle it, Damien. I can tell you’re stressed about finding someone to look after them. I’m right next door. I can take them for two walks before I head to work in the afternoon then be here at night when she comes to pick them up.”
“You serious about this?”
The dogs were looking back and forth between us in unison as if they were interested in the outcome of this conversation.
“Totally.”
“Alright. But I insist on lining up a backup in case you bail out mid-week.”
“I won’t. I’m not a quitter.”
“I really appreciate it.”
“It’ll be good exercise. I see your ex running after them sometimes when she drops them off. They’re basically walking her.”
“Yeah, you just need to hold on and go with the flow.”
“I can handle it.”
I couldn’t figure out whether those would be my famous last words.
***
The following week with Damien gone, I needed to be up early to collect the dogs from Jenna.
That first day, I had to admit that I was a little nervous to meet her up close and in person. At the same time, even though she’d been intimate with the guy I was obsessed with, he’d dumped her. So, I felt an equal sense of sympathy and kinship, seeing as though Damien made it clear that things weren’t going anywhere between him and me, either.
Damien told me he always fed the dogs as soon as they were dropped off then took them for a walk an hour or two later. I figured I could try to nap in between their breakfast and the walk then take them out again before heading to work. In the evenings, I would give them one more meal and walk them one last time before she picked them up for the night.
He’d given me the key to his apartment, so I made myself some coffee while I waited for the dogs to arrive.
The door opened, prompting me to straighten in my seat. Dudley and Drewfus ran into the room ahead of her.
Wiping my hands on my pants, I said, “Hi, I’m Chelsea.”
“Yes. I know.”
Damien had told me that Jenna worked as a hair stylist downtown. She was wearing black pants that hugged her wide hips and a black shirt with the name of the salon written in sequins. Her physique made me wonder if Damien preferred curvier bodies to more athletic figures like mine. Her hair was cut into a straight brown bob. She was definitely attractive, although not someone I would characterize as a bombshell. Jenna was naturally pretty with big brown eyes and a funky style as exhibited by her multi-colored fingernails and fitted retro leather half-jacket.
“It’s nice to meet you,” I said.
“Is it?”
“Yes.”
“I’m sorry. I can be a little snarky. He told me to be nice to you.”
“He did?”
“Yeah. He didn’t want me to scare you away, maybe.” She gave me a quick once-over that made me wish I had dressed up a bit. “You’re probably so into him, that wouldn’t happen, though, right?”
Great.
“Damien and I…we’re just friends.”
“Oh, I’m sure that’s the official label. But you probably like him, right?”
“Why do you say that?”
“Because I’ve been there, and I can tell by your face. You’re blushing.”
“Everything makes me blush. It doesn’t mean anything,” I lied. “Well, regardless, it doesn’t matter. He’s already closed the door on that.”