CHAPTER 14:
A Teletubby at Work
When Tucker arrived at the gym that evening for his shift, his boss Cliff greeted him in the foyer. ‘Hello Tucker. Good to see you on time for a change.’
‘Of course,’ Tucker said, determined to impress his boss. ‘You’re looking at the ideal employee, Mr Morrison. From here on in, you’re gonna see me as indispensable.’
‘I find that hard to believe.’ Cliff chuckled. ‘And since when did you start calling me Mr Morrison?’
‘It’s a sign of respect,’ Tucker greased. ‘You’re the boss, the man who pays our salary. I’m not like these other employees who think you’re a jerk. I…’
Cliff’s recoiled. ‘What do you mean other employees who think I’m a jerk? I try to treat all my staff with respect. I…’
‘Oh! I didn’t mean it like that.’ Tucker realised the difficult situation he had put himself in. ‘They all like you, Mr Morrison. We all think you’re the greatest boss ever…’ and then he thought about his offsider Frank Gunther and how he’d love to have his job. ‘Err… except for Frank. He thinks you’re a lousy boss and you pay him crap money, but if I was doing his job I’d be grateful. You wouldn’t see me going around bad-mouthing you, Mr M.’
‘Frank thinks I’m a jerk?’ Cliff looked pained. ‘Are you sure he thinks that?’
‘Yes, he’s always telling me what a tosser you are. Of course, I always stick up for you, I say you’re a cool dude.’
A frown appeared on Cliff’s face. ‘Now hold on a minute. How do you know what Frank thinks of me? He’s never around when you are. You’re on totally different shifts. He leaves half an hour before you get here.’
‘Oh, we often meet up at the pub for a few beers.’ Tucker beamed, admiring himself at how fast he could come up with a plausible reason for things.
‘What?’ Cliff scoffed. ‘The pub? Beers? Who the hell are you trying to kid? You’re only sixteen years old, you can’t get into pubs.’
Tucker realised he’d made another mistake, yet still adeptly came up with a response. ‘But people always say I look twenty. I’m very mature for my age.’
‘Bullshit! You’re feeding me a crock of shit. You don’t talk to Frank at all, you’re just making up fairytales.’
‘But they’re true fairytales!’ Tucker desperately searched his mind for something to back up his lies. ‘You know, I get really annoyed with him, Cliff. Every time I come in and look for cleaning products, the bottles are almost always empty. He uses so much and wastes so much. You really ought to give him the sack, Mr Morrison.’
‘Give him the sack? And who should we replace him with. You?’
‘Well I am your top employee.’ Tucker smiled broadly.
‘You, my top employee? The day that happens will be when you go through one day without making a total balls-up of something.’
‘Well that day will be today! So, I take it I’ve got the job?’
‘Huh! Look Tucker, I’ll tell you what, if you can get through today without messing up once, I’ll double your pay, how about that?’
‘You got yourself a deal, Mr M!’
Cliff chuckled a few times. ‘You’re incredible…’
‘Yep,’ Tucker said, standing up straight. ‘That’s what they call me, incredible. You’re lucky to have me, Mr M.’
‘Yeah, right.’ Cliff shook his head in amusement. Then his face turned serious again. ‘Oh, by the way, we’ve had a few people complain of getting sick after working out here. I’m a bit concerned about the state of the toilets and gym equipment. Have you been cleaning them?’
‘Of course! I gave them a thorough cleaning last night and I’ll be doing them again tonight.’
‘Good.’ Cliff was about to say something else, but then sighed. ‘Ok, well just make sure you do a proper job. I just thought it was strange that you used bugger all cleaning products last night.’
‘Hey, Mr M, my cleaning skills are so finely honed now I don’t have to use so much.
‘Well, I guess that’s something.’
‘I’m an expert toilet cleaner, my man. I’m saving this company millions.’
‘Huh! That’ll be the day. Anyway, I’ve got things to do, so I’ll pop by to see how you’re getting on later.’
Tucker felt very pleased with himself as he entered the main workout room. He didn’t know why he hadn’t thought of doing away with cleaning products months ago. All they did was create more work. It was much easier, just cleaning with a cloth and a bucket of hot water.
Glorious Gloria was the only one there working out on the leg press machine. Tucker couldn’t help but ogle her in her leotard. She was so fine. Just Tucker’s type.
Tucker scowled when Rex entered the gym. Rex delivered Gloria a friendly wave. She immediately sat up and returned a dazzling smile. If only she would smile at me like that, thought Tucker. Typical ubbing Cassidy, always getting all the positive attention.’
Gloria climbed to her feet and strolled over to where Rex was setting up some weights on the shoulder press machine. He turned to her and they exchanged pleasantries. Gloria’s face was full of sparkles and light as she spoke to him. It made Tucker ill to think that someone as glorious as her would be so friendly with a guy like Rex. She was ten years his senior too!
It made Tucker’s blood boil and made him think of his meeting with Luke. Rex would most definitely pay for stealing Gloria’s attention, attention that rightfully belonged to Tucker. He’d heard that Rex and his friends were going to have a beach party on Saturday, one that they had the gall not to invite him too. Well they would pay the price once he and Luke put their little plan into action. The party, Rex and his friends were so looking forward to, was going to result in humiliation and trouble for all of them. Rex would be in so much trouble, not even his money would bail him out of it.
Tucker chuckled evilly to himself at the thought.
Glorious Gloria returned to her machine, while Rex got to work on his. Look at the big meathead, pumping away at those weights. Thinks he’s Arnold Schwarzenegger! He’s in for a nasty shock on Saturday.
Tucker got to work on cleaning some of the machines. With a spray bottle filled with water and a cloth, he went around wiping the handles of the equipment.
Gloria finished her workout a short time later. Her skin glistened from sweat and she looked so sexy in her figure-hugging leotard. She was about to walk by him, but stopped, much to his delight and spoke to him. ‘Tucker, aren’t you supposed to be doing that with proper disinfectant sprays?’
‘Err…’ Tucker wasn’t sure what to say. He considered telling her it was a special new spray that only looked like water, but figured she wouldn’t believe him. She never believed any of his tall stories. ‘Short on disinfectant at the moment. We’ll be getting some more in tomorrow.’
‘I hope so.’ She moved off.
He watched her shapely behind as it swung backwards and forwards as she walked towards the exit, continuing to pump the handle on the spray bottle as he did. When he looked back, he found water dripping all over the machine he was cleaning. He groaned and went about mopping it up.
After cleaning a few more machines, he decided he deserved a well-earned break. He stepped back into the main foyer and was about to head for the staffroom when another vision of loveliness entered the building. His eyes opened wide and his heart leapt.
‘Vanessa!’ Tucker greeted eagerly. ‘Hi, how are ya, babe?’
At first, Vanessa’s expression was one of disapproval, but she replied in a friendly manner. ‘Wow, this is the last place I’d expect to see you. I would have thought that any place involving exercise, you’d avoid like the plague. In fact, I would have thought that just the word gymnasium would have had you feeling ill.’
Tucker saw this as an opportunity to impress her. ‘Hey, you’re looking at the workout king here. I often hang out here, working out, pumping iron and all that jazz. Everybody here knows me by name. That’s why I have the fine physique you’re lo
oking at right now.’ He slapped his flabby arms, making them wobble violently. ‘Pure, unadulterated…’
‘…fat?’ Vanessa smirked.
‘Muscle. It’s all muscle. You too can have a body like mine…’
‘…if I neglect it?’
‘Yep… hey wait no, this body I’ve got here took a lot of work, you know. Hours and hours of time spent in…’
‘…the kitchen scoffing down snacks?’
‘…In the gym training. I’m a machine.’
‘Yeah huh, like the ones you use to grind up rubbish. Waste disposal units I believe they call them.
‘No, I’m a…’
‘Pyles!’ the annoyed voice of his boss called from a nearby doorway. ‘Why the hell are you bothering potential clients? Get back to work, you haven’t got time to be standing around scaring off my customers.’ He stepped over towards the two of them.
‘Ah, so he works here.’ Vanessa smirked. ‘A Teletubby at work.’
‘Sorry Miss. I hope he hasn’t been a pain. You can rest assured he is usually out back cleaning and you won’t normally see him. To make up for it, I’d be happy to give you a week’s free membership.’
‘That’s nice of you. I’ll take you up on the offer. It really was a traumatic experience having to deal with this guy.’ She laughed. ‘You really should keep him on a leash you know. I think he may need a muzzle too, just to stop the mindless drivel that comes out of his mouth. The drool looks pretty toxic too, but seeing as you’ve been so nice, I promise I won’t sue on this occasion.’ She smiled cheekily.
‘I’m sorry. I promise he’ll never bother you again. If he does, he’ll be out the door in a flash.’
‘Relax! He was good for a laugh. Hey, I know I’m not a member yet, but is it alright if I just go in and take a look?’
‘By all means. Take as long as you like. Have a free workout if you like.’
‘Thank you.’ She smiled sweetly and headed toward the main door.
Cliff continued to gaze after her, until she disappeared from sight. He sighed, still staring at the door. ‘Wow, she’s incredible.’
Tucker spoke, ‘She’s new at my school.’
Cliff’s face dropped. ‘Damn. She looks about 18. What a figure!’
‘She’s pretty incredible alright.’
Cliff came to his senses and a glare came over his face. ‘Get back to work, Pyles! I don’t wanna see you farting around again.’
‘Yes boss!’ Tucker decided against taking his break, just to appease Cliff. He also thought he’d like to return to the workout room, just to see more of Vanessa, even if it was just to gaze upon her from a distance.
When he re-entered the workout room he was surprised to see she was not in there. He peered around and figured she must have gone out back to see some of the other gym facilities first.
He cautiously made his way out back, wanting to make sure nobody noticed him. He walked through a short corridor to where the spa room was, but stopped when he heard voices. One was the unmistakable voice of the goddess herself. The other voice was one that Tucker did not care to hear. It sickened his stomach even more. She was talking to Rex. Tucker cursed his luck once again that Rex was getting to chat up the cute girls.
‘Please, Rex,’ came the angelic voice of Vanessa. ‘You’ve been avoiding me all day and I need to talk to you.’
‘We spoke enough on Saturday night.’
Vanessa’s voice wavered a little. ‘Please. I’m here now. I’m in some of the same classes as you at school. I’ll be seeing you everyday. You can’t keep dodging me forever and I don’t think you want to.’
‘This is nuts, Nessa. I can’t believe you turned up out of the blue like you did.’
‘I know and I’m not gonna say sorry about that. I need you around, Rex, it’s too hard without you.’
‘Come on, Ness, you’re not that needy. You survived for two years.’
‘I know, but I never stopped thinking about you. I’ve never stopped loving you. I’ve missed you like crazy.’
Tucker felt like sinking down to the floor in despair. It was the never-ending story of Tucker’s life... Tucker – the hero meets gorgeous damsel. Gorgeous damsel wants nothing to do with hero. Gorgeous damsel goes after evil villain instead. However, this saga had an even more evil twist. This time the gorgeous damsel was in love with the evil villain to begin with.
Tucker peeped around the corner and could see them both standing there. Vanessa’s eyes glistened as tears began to form. ‘Tell me you still care about me, Rex. I know you do. Otherwise you wouldn’t have stuck up for me like you did those two times.’
Rex remained silent for a few seconds, before he spoke again. ‘This can’t work. My life is different now. I’ve moved on.’
‘We can still be friends, can’t we?’
‘I don’t think we can ever just be friends. Besides… I can’t go through all that shit again.’
‘It won’t happen again. I promise!’
‘I’m sure you mean what you say, Nessie, but I just can’t take that risk and neither can you. I couldn’t handle it happening again.’
‘It won’t!’
‘I can’t risk it, Ness.’
‘It’ll be different this time. My mother and I won’t have to move away.’
‘How can you be so sure?’
‘Not me anyway. I’ll get a job. Modelling even.’ Tears continued to fill her eyes. It seemed strange to see her looking so sad. Tucker didn’t think that a goddess could cry.
Vanessa tried to take Rex in her arms, but Rex took a step back. ‘No, Nessie. It can’t happen. You know it was for your own good, we had to break contact. That’s why I never kept in contact with you after you left Taukauri. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do, but I agreed to it in the end.’
‘They’re wrong, Rex.’ Vanessa sniffed. ‘They are so wrong. It only made things worse for me, not being able to talk to you on the phone, not being able to chat with you on-line. It broke my heart.’
Rex touched her arm gently. ‘I know it did.’
‘I can’t… I…’
‘You can. You have to. You’ve gotta move on. You have to get over me.’
‘Like you got over me? I can’t do that Rex.’
‘No Nessie… Not like me… I never got over you.’
She looked at him hopefully for a few seconds. ‘…You didn’t?’
‘No. There’s hardly a day gone by where I haven’t thought about you and wondered how you were doing now.’
‘So, let me back in. We’re gonna see each other everyday.’
‘I can’t let you back in. For your good and mine, I can’t. It’s up to me to be the strong one.’
‘You don’t always have to be the strong one, Rex. You don’t have to be Superman all the time. For once, you can be weak too. You know Kryptonite really isn’t that bad.’
‘No. I can’t. Not this time.’
Vanessa sniffed, but just stared at him forlornly.
‘I’m sorry.’ He released her arm. ‘You’d better go.’
‘Ok…’ she said sadly. She took a step back, but continued to stare at him. Rex looked away.
Tucker knew he had to move, because she was coming back. He quickly ducked back around the corner and pretended to be adjusting one of the weight machines. He noticed her rush by and disappear out the front door. Rex came in a few minutes later and his eyes glistened. He wiped his face as if trying to rub away a tear.
All Tucker could feel for Rex was anger. It built up inside him like a fire being stoked. How could he treat a goddess like Vanessa this way? It made Tucker even more determined to teach Rex the lesson of his life. On Saturday, at the beach, he would pay for his crimes.
CHAPTER 15:
Culture Shock