Read No, Papa! Page 16


  The lesson was long and especially boring, something about the greatness-of-Italian-history-and-its-place-in-the-wider-development-of-European-culture or something but whatever it was, I found myself on a one-way ticket to Yawns-ville USA. And I arrived. I didn’t try to hide it, I just opened wide and let rip a long exhalation the meaning of which no one could have mistaken. The U-boat stopped droning about Renaissance art and rapped her ruler on the desk, her usual method of snapping my attention back when she suspected it might be straying.

  ‘What is wrong?’ she rasped. ‘Do you not find this interesting?’

  ‘About as interesting as a rain shower on a wet Sunday,’ I replied wearily. ‘Tell me, why do I have to learn this stuff?’

  ‘This “stuff”, as you call it, is your country’s history. It is what makes Italy what it is today!’

  ‘Yeah?’ I muttered. ‘Someone must have fouled up with the blueprints big time, then.’

  ‘Silence! You will not speak of your homeland in this way! You will learn respect for it!’

  ‘You’ve been talking to my father, haven’t you?’ I said. ‘You sound a lot like him sometimes, you know that?’

  ‘Your father is a great man, a man of the highest standing in the community! You should be proud of him and thankful that he has the wisdom you need to help you guide your life in the right direction.’

  ‘You mean control me so I turn out the way he wants,’ I said dryly. ‘And what’s this about his standing in the community? Most people hate the sight of him—apart from his family, that is, and they don’t count for anything in the wider scheme of things.’

  ‘Silence! You have been warned before about showing disrespect to your family. Don’t let me have to do it again. As for your father’s standing, it is of the highest order. He is a respected scientist, a man with a formidable reputation, one to be envied by those of lesser stature than his.’

  ‘You really have been talking to him,’ I said. ‘So this reputation, he guards it pretty jealously, I’d guess.’

  ‘A man in his position must guard it,’ she said. ‘His whole professional life stands or falls by it.’

  ‘Really,’ I said, suddenly getting interested. ‘So if something came out, something that he’d done that was maybe immoral or illegal, it could be pretty damaging to him.’

  ‘It could, yes, could even be fatal to his career. But there is no chance of that happening: your father’s character is beyond reproach. But we are straying from the lesson and there is yet a further half hour to go before we finish, and I will add an extra five minutes to make up for the time we have wasted in this pointless discussion. So, to continue…’

  And we continued. But I was okay with that. While I sat there and tried to look as if I was learning, I was thinking. He had something that was important to him, did he? Damaging it could be fatal to his career, could it? Ri-i-ight…

  I still had the papers from the time I went to see Eliana and the time I cornered the judge. The only problem was how to get this stuff out to a wider audience. Well, that wasn’t so much the problem, actually—the internet would take care of that—but rather how to get it there in the first place. You see, I still wasn’t allowed computer time, I wasn’t allowed out except under close escort and the only person in the whole of Sicily who could help was now strictly off limits so I had a bit of a problem. Since when did that stop me, I hear you ask? You know, we really are getting to know each other.

  But until then, I could at least do a little preparation. The first thing I needed was a scan, a scan of a damning piece of claptrap that a judge had already thrown out—Allegato 4. Lying to the court was not only pretty illegal, it was also pretty embarrassing to the person doing the lying, and even though the judge had thrown it out, that didn’t matter: my father had been caught red-handed, the crime had been committed. Even that being made known to the wider world would be enough, my father’s precious standing in the community shot through with enough holes to at least shake it a little, maybe even bring it down in a thundering crash of public humiliation. So I needed it scanned into a JPG file ready for uploading onto Facebook with the story behind it added courtesy of yours truly.

  But that meant I’d need a scanner (one in my father’s study, the one I’d already used), a computer to transfer the file onto (one in my father’s study but password protected), and internet access (one in my father’s study which I wasn’t allowed to use, one in the public library where I wasn’t allowed to go and one with Eliana who I wasn’t allowed to see). Simple, really, when you stopped to think about it.

  Have you ever found help coming when you least expect it? It happens all the time, you just have to know it’s happening, you have to see it.

  TWENTY NINE

  Like before, it happened during a lesson. I was trying to draw a straight line with a chipped ruler when a sudden familiar ringing broke my concentration. I looked up but the U-boat had already slipped her moorings and was gliding down-channel.

  ‘Continue with your work,’ she rasped before submerging through the doorway.

  But I didn’t continue with my work, I pricked my ears up and listened. If it was Eliana again, I needed to know. It could mean another letter from home, news about the lawyer, even mum herself trying on the offchance that she would get me. Whatever, I wanted to hear this.

  ‘Hello?…This is Dr. Pellegrino’s residence, yes. Who are you, please?…I see. Well, he is not here but I am authorised to speak on his behalf. What is this in connection with, please?…I see. Yes, I do understand the situation. I shall inform him the moment he returns home…You are welcome. Goodbye.’

  I heard the phone click back down—cue for me to start looking busy again—but as she resurfaced, I couldn’t help but look up.

  ‘Problem?’ I asked, and to my surprise, she actually answered.

  ‘It is a matter of some consequence, yes, a matter for your father.’

  ‘Yeah? What, has he been caught fiddling his expenses again?’

  ‘Silence! For that show of disrespect, this lesson will be extended by a further fifteen minutes! The call was from your old school. Apparently, there are some things of yours that you left behind when you stopped attending and they wish to know what to do with them.’

  ‘Yeah, well, I did leave in a bit of a hurry,’ I said. ‘So what gives? Do I get them back?’

  ‘That is a matter for your father to decide, nothing of your concern.’

  ‘Actually, I think you’ll find it is my concern. You see, I left a lot of stuff there, a lot that might be useful to my education here.’

  ‘We…’ She hesitated. For the first time since she walked into the place, she hesitated, like she was thinking something, like maybe she could turn this to her advantage. ‘…I will put your suggestion to your father,’ she said eventually. ‘But the final decision will be his.’

  ‘Fine. And while you’re at it, tell him that only I will know where everything is so it will have to be me to go and do the necessary. If he’s worried I might get up to something, he can always send you along to keep an eye on me.’

  She thought about this for a moment, like she was considering the prospect of escaping the classroom for a few hours. ‘I will put the matter to him,’ she said carefully. ‘But for now, continue with your work.’

  And that’s how it started. Like she said she would, she put it to my father, and he, in a good mood for once because one of his articles had been favourably reviewed by a colleague, said yes—but only on the proviso that I was under close escort all the way, that I was not to be let out of sight of the U-boat’s periscope for even a moment. I could live with that. You see, one thing I’d learned in all of this is that it doesn’t take much to get a rule broken.

  So it was that we presented ourselves to the school secretary, and you know, she was pleased to see me. I mean, seriously pleased. As we walked in the door, she saw me, leapt up from her desk and rushed to give me a hug, ask how I was—you know what I’m saying here. The U
-boat? She just stood there looking sour, and I could understand that: no one would ever be pleased to see her.

  ‘So you are here to collect your things,’ said the secretary when she’d finished and the introductions are over.

  ‘Got it in one. But first, how are things here? How’s my favourite headmaster?’

  ‘Find out for yourself,’ she said, picking up the phone and pressing a button. Then: ‘Headmaster, there is someone here to see you…No, she doesn’t have an appointment but I think you will wish to see her…Fine.’

  Even before she put the phone back down, he was there, throwing his door wide open and standing there as I’d always known him, filling its frame, filling everyone in that little reception with his presence.

  ‘Elisa! How good to see you again! And I see you’ve brought a friend!’ he added, turning to her.

  ‘My governess and teacher,’ I said by way of introduction. ‘Signora Di Scoglio.’

  He held out a hand. ‘Delighted to meet you. It is not often that we get visits from people of such professional standing.’

  For a moment, she seemed completely taken aback, like she wasn’t used to receiving compliments. ‘I…well, that is…I mean…’

  ‘Come, come, Signora Di Scoglio! We are all of one persuasion here, dedicated to the education of our future citizens. You are too modest, I’m sure. Well, come in, come in. Maria, would you be good enough to find coffee for three, please?’ he added as we filed past him and into his small office. ‘And perhaps some biscuits?’

  I didn’t hear the reply as he closed the door behind us, didn’t need to. Maria was a good secretary, that much I knew.

  ‘So here we are again, Elisa,’ he was saying as we sat down. ‘We have missed you in this school.’

  ‘Really?’ I asked, surprised.

  ‘Absolutely. Your friendliness to the other students, your contributions to the lesson, our little chats.’

  I caught the emphasis in his voice, the twinkle in his eye. Did I get what he was saying here? You bet I did!

  ‘Yeah, I’ve missed them too,’ I said. ‘A lot’s happened since then, a lot more that could happen if it got the chance.’

  ‘I see,’ he said, and he said it in such a way that yeah, he did see!

  If the U-boat noticed anything about this conversation, she gave no sign. She just sat there gazing round at the office, and I figured that being an unofficial sort of teacher and all that, she was feeling maybe a little awed by it.

  ‘Signora Di Scoglio!’ the headmaster boomed, and you could almost hear the click of bone as her head snapped round to him. ‘I trust Elisa is proving to be as able a student as ever she was when she was here?’

  She glanced at me before replying, couldn’t hide the faint disgust of me. ‘She is…adequate,’ she said carefully. ‘Lacking in discipline and respect but these things can be changed.’

  ‘Ah, but I was thinking more academically. All boys and girls of her age go through a rebellious stage, it’s part of growing up. How is her work, is what I mean.’

  Another moment to consider this. ‘Adequate,’ she said again. ‘I have taught worse, taught better. But again, this can be changed.’

  ‘You seem somewhat knowledgeable in matters of education, Signora Di Scoglio,’ the headmaster said easily. ‘Would you care for a tour of our facilities here?’

  ‘This is not what we came to do,’ she said quickly. ‘Elisa’s things, they must be returned to her.’

  ‘And returned they will be,’ he soothed. ‘But surely while you are here, you can spare just a few minutes of your time to look at what we try to do here in this school and perhaps offer your expert opinion for improvements?’

  ‘Well, there is always room for improvement,’ she began, ‘but—but I cannot leave Elisa alone to find her things.’

  ‘Why, is that all! We can leave her with my secretary. A good and capable woman, as I’m sure you have witnessed. She will look after Elisa while we tour the school.’

  ‘Well…all right, then. As long as this does not take long. I have promised Dr. Pellegrino to have her back within the hour.’

  ‘Have no fear, Signora Di Scoglio! Our school is not large. We will be back here before the coffee has a chance to get cold. So if we may…?’

  He got up, beckoning to her to follow. She got up uncertainly, glancing at me as though wondering if this really was such a good idea. I said nothing, just let this play out as my wonderful headmaster had obviously planned it.

  ‘Maria,’ he was saying as he led the U-boat from the office, ‘I’m just taking Signora Di Scoglio here for a tour of the school. Please look after Elisa while we’re away, make sure she has everything she needs.’

  That emphasis again, and I glimpsed Maria giving a single nod as though she understood. I wasn’t sure but I had the suspicion my story was no big secret.

  But they were gone, the headmaster talking loudly as he and the U-boat passed down the corridor. Only then did Maria get up and come to me.

  ‘Do you still want coffee?’ she asked. ‘It is nearly ready.’

  ‘Thanks but it can wait,’ I said, springing into action. ‘What I need right now is a scanner and the headmaster’s computer.’

  ‘Er…can I ask why?’

  I stopped rummaging in my bag to look at her. ‘You know what’s been happening, don’t you?’

  She nodded. ‘Call it a welfare issue. All involved staff must know the circumstances of their students and I am involved so…’

  ‘Right. Then you’ll know that I have to do something, and that something involves scanner and computer.’

  ‘It is nothing illegal, is it?’

  ‘Illegal, no. Questionable, maybe. Look, you don’t have to help me, you don’t have to do a thing. Just leave me in here and look the other way. Okay?’

  She nodded hastily and withdrew, closing the door softly behind her.

  Already, I was behind the desk, reaching for the mouse and…Oh God, no! The computer was locked. It was no big deal, it just meant it had been left for a while, the screensaver had come and gone, and the whole machine decided it wasn’t needed for a while so could take a nap. It’s a simple security thing but so effective that to wake it up takes more than just a rude shaking. I looked up at the clock. I didn’t need this. They would be back soon and if they caught me in the middle of doing this then I wouldn’t be the only one in trouble. I glanced at the door. Nothing for it…

  I rushed to it, yanked it open. ‘Maria.’

  She looked up from her own screen. ‘What?’

  ‘I need your help. The computer’s locked and I was wondering if maybe—’

  ‘—I had the password,’ she finished dryly. ‘Well, yes, I do but I can’t just give it to you.’

  ‘I know but…Look, this is really important. If I do this, I stand a much bigger chance of getting back home to mum in England. Isn’t there anything you can do?’

  She eyed me sternly, like a teacher about to tell someone off. ‘What you want to do, just how “questionable” is it?’

  ‘Let’s just say my father won’t like it when he finds out but he deserves everything that comes from it.’

  She hesitated maybe a full two seconds before she was up and out of that chair and pushing her way past me.

  ‘You stand outside, you close the door and look anywhere but in this direction,’ she said, so I did.

  I heard the tapping of keys and silence, then she was emerging from the office again, looking tight-lipped at me.

  ‘Whatever it is you have to do, do it now and be quick. And if anyone asks—’

  ‘—the computer was live or I hacked into it or I was never here—yeah, I know. But look at it this way: the headmaster did tell you to make sure I had everything I needed.’

  ‘You know, that makes me feel a whole lot better. Go on. Move.’

  I moved. I switched on the scanner. As it warmed up, I was pulling the infamous Allegato 4 from my schoolbag, brought with me to pack my things into but
in reality acting as hiding place. I lay it on the bed, closed the top and pressed the scan switch. Even as it was doing its stuff, I was at the computer, working out where the file should be sent. Desktop, had to be desktop. Instantly deleted from desktop, and that was important when it came to saving headmaster’s skins by destroying evidence.

  An icon flickered into being on the screen. I opened it to find a perfect JPG image of the paper—damn, the paper! I grabbed it from the scanner and thrust it back into my bag. That was something that could be left lying around even less than a computer file. Stage one over. Let stage two commence.

  I opened the internet, typed into the address bar facebook.com, and the screen was suddenly flooded with familiarity. It had been a long time since I was last logged in, not since I’d left England. There were messages waiting for me, posts on my wall asking where I was, was I okay? But they would have to wait. I clicked on the new post box, typed in a short message, short but to the point and in block capitals so no one could miss it.

  SORRY I’VE BEEN AWAY BUT MY FATHER IS BLOCKING ALL CONTACT BETWEEN ME AND THE OUTSIDE WORLD. PLEASE READ THIS. MY FATHER, DR. VITTORIO PELLEGRINO OF THE STATE UNIVERSITY, HAS LIED TO A COURT. THIS IS A CRIMINAL ACT. THE PROOF IS IN THE ATTACHED SCAN. MY MOTHER NEVER WROTE THIS LETTER. IT IS A FORGERY AND HAS ALREADY BEEN THROWN OUT BY A JUDGE AND I REPEAT, MY FATHER HAS COMMITTED A CRIME BY LYING TO A COURT. PLEASE SHARE AND SEND VIRAL. AND WISH ME LUCK. I WANT TO GO HOME. TO ENGLAND.

  I uploaded the scan and waited for it to appear on my wall, then shut down. I wanted to stay longer, to maybe catch up with people, but I knew I couldn’t afford to take that chance. That time would come. That much I could promise myself.

  I was sitting quietly when they returned, the headmaster and the U-boat, his voice booming well in advance to warn me they were on their way back, just in case I was up to something and needed to look all innocence when they finally walked in through the door.

  ‘Well,’ he said as he sat down in his chair again, ‘I hope Maria has been looking after you while we’ve been gone.’

  I let slip a grin, couldn’t help it. ‘Don’t worry, she was very helpful.’