*
I hadn’t seen Nancy since that awful night when Dad and Greg dragged me before the entire church and everything had turned into a virtual nightmare. I was sure she was angry with me and probably didn’t want any more to do with me. Still, I wondered how she was and what she was doing. What’s more, I wanted to ask her about the dark clouds that had attacked everyone. I also had been craving coffee ice cream for some time, and I considered Baskin Robbins’ the best. I had been fighting the urge for several days, but I finally gave in one especially hot afternoon when I was out and about on church errands.
When I walked in, they were busy. Nancy and a young Asian man were the only two working. Nancy saw me, but didn’t say anything. The young man finished with his customer first and asked if he could help me. I went to order, but Nancy suddenly spoke up and said she wanted to talk to me, for them to switch customers. He shrugged and said it didn’t matter to him and she came on over, and in a low voice asked, “You okay?”
I was surprised. I had expected anger, not concern. “Not really,” I honestly replied.
Nodding for me to come around to the side so we could talk, I followed, not sure what she was going to say.
“I am so sorry that Aunt Ruth got you in trouble!”
“I… I thought you were angry with me?”
She shook her head no. “Why would I be angry with you?”
“I thought you considered me a traitor or something.”
“No! No! No!” She glanced over at the Asian boy. “You okay, Mike?”
“I’m okay. I’ve got everyone covered.”
She glanced at the clock on the back wall. Still speaking to Mike, she said, “It’s three. I’m going to take a five minute break now.”
“Ok,” he replied, flashing a white-toothed smile. “Then I get mine.”
“Naturally,” she said, grinning. She turned to me. “Mike’s a saint.” She thought about it a second. “Well… not actually. But you get my drift. He’s great.”
“There’s something I have to ask you about, Nancy.”
She focused on my face. “Toss it at me. What is it?”
“That night… when Greg and my dad dragged me into the church… Well, they were… well… pretty much trying to exorcise a demon out of me.”
“I heard.” Her brown eyes flashed angrily. “I was really pissed when my aunt told me what she did. Honestly, I’m done with her now. I have put up with her crap for a couple of years. Went to church with her to try and appease her. Wasn’t enough. She had to betray you. She had to betray me. I don’t care if she is the only aunt I have. I have had it!”
“Seriously?”
“Damn right. Seriously!”
“I was so afraid you were mad at me.”
“Why on Earth would I be mad at you? You’re the one who was railroaded into confessing something you shouldn’t have had to confess. I know. Aunt Ruth told me all about it.” She grinned smugly then. “Right before I kicked her fat derriere out of my apartment and told her I didn’t want to ever see her ugly face again.”
“Oh! Did she tell you about the little dark clouds attacking us?”
“Yep.”
“Did she tell you that they left when I asked Jesus for forgiveness?”
“Yep!”
“What were they?”
“I’m not sure, Brenda… Astral entities of some kind. I have seen them before, and they have never harmed me or anyone of my pagan friends. I don’t think they were there to harm you. Did any of them attack you, specifically?”
I had to think about it a minute. “Actually, no. I was so terrified I freaked out, not knowing what was going on. I just did what I thought I should under the circumstances. Reacted in a way I was brought up to react. I called on Jesus for forgiveness. They didn’t leave immediately. It took a few minutes. They still attacked some of the parishioners, but eventually left. So, I figured that I had been in the wrong after all. But it sure as hell didn’t feel like it.”
“Yeah. That comes from that Christian brainwashing. I am so glad my folks didn’t raise me up in the church. Actually, my dad was an atheist. And mom just didn’t care. She said she believed in something. Believed there was a God, but she didn’t believe in all the religious mumbo-jumbo her sister believed in.”
“You’re lucky.”
“Tell me about it.” She glanced back over her shoulder to check the clock and then turned back to me. “Hey. If you can get away, come by one of these evenings.”
“Are you kidding? I’m a prisoner in my own home. I had errands to run. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have gotten by here to see you.”
“That is no way to live, Brenda. You need to get away from there!”
I bobbed my head yes. “That’s an understatement. But I don’t have my own money. I don’t have a job. Neither Dad nor Greg will let me get a job. They say my duties for the church are my job, even though I don’t really have more than a few dollars at a time to spend for myself.”
“I am so sorry. And I hate to say it, so glad I’m not in your shoes. Wicca is awesome. You would have been happy with us.”
“Maybe. But that’s out of the question now.”
She touched the top of my hand with her fingertips. “If you really want to find a way, you will. You know there’s that old saying: “Where there’s a will there’s a way.”
“I hope you’re right.” I realized I’d been there a little too long. “Well, I’d better get. And thanks so much for not being angry with me.”
“Never! It’s that traitor aunt of mine that I am pissed at. Not you. You come back to see me anytime you can. Now, you wanted a coffee cone. Right?”
I nodded yes.
“Two scoops?”
“Always.”
She got my ice-cream and handed it over the counter to me. “And no charge.”
“You’re sure?”
“Absolutely! I’m assistant manager now. Got promoted a couple of weeks ago.”
“Congratulations!”
“Thanks! I’m happy about it.”
I thanked her again for the cone, said goodbye to her and Mike and left. I was now worried that I had been gone too long and couldn’t get home fast enough.
Sure enough, Greg met me at the door, face drawn, angry. “Where you been?”
“I’m not a child! And this is a free country. I was running errands for yours and Dad’s church! You’re the one who sent me, remember?”
His brown narrowed. “What do you mean by ‘yours and Dad’s church’?”
“It’s certainly not mine! Honestly, I hate church anymore! Hate it!” And I stormed off to the bathroom and locked the door behind me, so he couldn’t follow. I shook uncontrollably. I had to wonder: Had I reacted too fast when I had given in that night at the church? Had I betrayed myself? “Shit!” I hissed. “Shit! Shit! Shit!”
“Brenda! Open the door!”
“Not until you promise to leave me alone!”
“You’ve been talking to that witch, Nancy, haven’t you?”
I didn’t answer.
“You had an ice cream cone in your hand when you came in – Baskin Robbins. I know that’s where she works.”
“As I said before, Greg, it’s a free country!”
“You are in danger of losing your soul! Don’t you care?”
“It can’t be any worse than living in the prison I’m living in now!” I retorted.
I heard him gasp and quickly leave. I knew he was going over to the church after Dad. I opened the bathroom door and ran out the front, not bothering to take the car. I headed straight for the park, tossing what little was left of my cone in a park trash can soon as I arrived. There was a water fountain. I went straight to it and rinsed off my hands and face. Then I saw the bench where I had talked to the blond-headed man, Erick, that day and went straight for it. I saw Dad’s car pass by, Greg in the passenger seat. I could see them, but they couldn’t see me. I figured it was only a matter of time before they realized I might be
at the park. So I jumped up and headed for the opposite side, behind the restroom building out of sight, hoping they wouldn’t think to search for me there.
This time I plopped down in front of a tall tree and leaned my back against it. I closed my eyes and did my best to slow down my breathing, for I had been panting from running so fast and so hard. I wondered if Erick was around. I know I hadn’t seen any signs of him upon entering the park. I opened my eyes, leaned forward and looked around in all directions. Only I couldn’t see through the bathroom building. I saw no one that even vaguely resembled him. “Dammit!”
I leaned my head back again and tried to clear my mind of all thoughts and anguish, for utterly devastated was the only thing I was capable of feeling, and that I didn’t want to feel at all.
I’m not sure how long I sat there, and I must have drifted off to sleep, for suddenly a loud, familiar voice said, “Here she is!”
My eyes popped open to see my father standing there glaring down at me while mopping his brow with a white handkerchief. Greg caught up with him right then.
“I just want to be left alone,” I said.
“There’s something seriously wrong with you, young lady!” my dad stated angrily.
“And there’s seriously something wrong with you! You can’t see what you are doing to me? You can’t see what you did to Mom! You take no blame for any of it.” I turned my attention to Greg. “And you’re just as bad, Greg! You’ve become my father’s clone!”
“What are you talking about, Brenda? I’ve tried to be understanding. I have.”
“Maybe a little. At first. But you are so freakin’ wrapped up in the church and what Dad wants you to do, that you can’t see the forest for the trees.”
“I’m doing God’s work, Brenda.”
“Yeah… Sure you are! Just keep telling yourself that,” was my sarcastic response.
“You need to come home. Now!” Dad ordered.
“I am not a thirteen-year-old runaway! I am a grown woman! You expect me to carry the load of three people! And it wouldn’t be so bad, if you actually cared about what my needs might be. But you don’t. Everything has to be what you dictate as God’s will. Well, I’ve got a newsflash for you. You’ve set yourself up on some pedestal, thinking you have all the answers, when you don’t. You’re doing what you want to do. No God is making you do it!”
Dad suddenly slapped me hard across the face. “I will not take your insolence!”
Even Greg appeared shocked. He just stared at Dad in disbelief.
My face hurt. It hurt like hell. But I wasn’t going to back down to him. Not this time.
“Go to hell!” I screamed.
He raised his hand to hit me again, but Greg intercepted his wrist. “No! No, Dad! That’s not the way. We don’t beat our women into obedience.”
Dad suddenly got this really weird look in his eyes and he slowly turned to Greg. He just stood there for a minute, pondering. After a bit, he said, “I’m sorry. I guess I lost it there for a minute.”
“I’m not the one you should apologize to,” Greg replied.
I was almost as stunned by Greg standing up for me as I was by my Dad hitting me.
Dad turned to me. “I’m sorry, Brenda. I just want you to come home.”
“Not if you’re going to yell at me and treat me like I’m some lowlife.”
He lowered his head, looking down at the ground. “I won’t. I promise. Just come home… Please?”
Dubiously, I looked at Greg.
He nodded yes.
“Okay.”
Greg took my hand and assisted me in standing. He held his arm around me while we walked back to the car. I wasn’t sure where any of this was going, but I knew that for the moment, my husband was at my side.
A male jogger with shoulder-length blond hair pulled back in a ponytail was coming down the path just as we approached the street and car. I recognized him instantly – Erick! And right as he passed by in front of us, I could have sworn he winked my way. After he passed, we continued on to the car. I couldn’t help wondering, though, if Erick had somehow had an influence on the outcome of what had just transpired. Then again, maybe I was just plain nuts. My father and husband had finally succeeded in driving me completely insane.