CHAPTER XIV
Since Vera's departure Raisky had experienced the meaning of unmitigatedsolitude. He felt as if he were surrounded by a desert, now that he wasdeprived of the sight of her, although nature around him was radiant andsmiling. Tatiana Markovna's anxious solicitude, Marfinka's charming rule,her songs, her lively chatter with the gay and youthful Vikentev, thearrival and departure of guests, the eccentricities of the freakishPaulina Karpovna--none of these things existed for him. He only saw thatthe lilac curtain was motionless, the blinds had been drawn down, andthat Vera's favourite bench remained empty.
He did not want to love Vera, and if he had wished it he ought still toresist, for Vera had denied him every hope; indeed her beauty seemed tohave lost its power over him, and he was now drawn to her by a differentattraction.
"What is Vera's real nature?" he asked his aunt one day.
"You see for yourself. She recognises only her own understanding and herown will. She was born in my arms, and has spent her whole life with me,yet I do not know what is in her mind, what are her likes and dislikes.I do not force her, or worry her, so that she can hardly think herselfunfortunate. You see for yourself that my girls live with me as free asthe birds of the air."
"You are right, Grandmother. It is not fear, or anxiety, or the power ofauthority that binds you to them, but the tenderest of home ties. Theyadore you, and so they ought to do, but it is the fruit of theirupbringing. Why should worn-out conceptions of duty be pressed upon them,and why should they live like caged birds? Let them dip into thereservoir of life itself. A bird imprisoned in a cage loses the capacityfor freedom, and, even if the door of his cage is opened, he will nottake flight."
"I have never tried to exercise restraint on Marfinka or Vera. Supposinga respectable, rich man of old and blameless family were to ask forMarfinka's hand, and she refused it, do you think I should persuadeher?"
"Well, Granny, I leave Marfinka to you, but do not attempt to doanything with Vera. You must not restrain her in any way, must leave herher freedom. One bird is born for the cage, another for freedom. Verawill be able to direct her own life."
"Do I restrain or repress her? I am like the police inspector who onlysees that there is an outward semblance of order; I do not penetratebelow the surface unless my assistance is invited."
"Tell me, Grandmother, what sort of a woman is this priest's wife, andwhat are the links that bind her to Vera?"
"Natalie Ivanovna and Vera made friends at a boarding school. She is agood, modest woman."
"Is she sensible? Possibly a woman of weight and character?"
"Oh no! She is not stupid, is fairly educated, a great reader, and fondof dress. The pope, who is much liked by the local landowner, is notpoor, and lives in comfort on his own land. He is a sensible man,belongs to the younger generation, but he leads too worldly a life forthe priesthood, as is the custom in landed society. He reads Frenchbooks, and smokes, for instance; things that are unsuited to thepriestly garb. Every glance of Veroshka's, every mood of hers is sacredto Natalie Ivanovna; whatever she may say is wise and good. This suitsVera, who does not want a friend, but an obedient servant; that is whyshe loves the pope's wife."
"And Vera loves you too?" asked Raisky, who wanted to know if Vera lovedanybody else except the pope's wife.
"Yes, she loves me," answered Tatiana Markovna with conviction, "but inher own fashion. She never shows it, and never will, though she loves meand would be ready to die for me."
"And you love Vera?"
"Ah, how I love her!" she sighed, and tears stood in her eyes. "She doesnot know, but perhaps one day she may learn."
"Have you noticed how thoughtful she has been for some time. Is she notin love?" he added in a half-whisper, but immediately regretted thequestion, which it was too late to withdraw. His aunt started back as ifa stone had hit her.
"God forbid!" she cried, making the sign of the Cross. "This sorrow hasbeen spared us. Do not disturb my peace, but confess, as you would tothe priest, if you know anything."
Raisky was annoyed with himself, and made an effort, partiallysuccessful, to pacify his aunt.
"I have not noticed anything more than you have. She would hardly belikely to say anything to me that she kept secret from you."
"Yes, yes, it is true she will say nothing. The pope's wife knowseverything, but she would rather die than betray Vera's secrets. Her ownsecrets she scatters for anyone to pick up, but not Vera's."
"With whom could she fall in love?" remarked Tatiana Markovna after asilence. "There is no one here."
"No one?" interrupted Raisky quickly.
Tatiana Markovna shook her head, then went on after a while:--
"There might be the Forester. He is an excellent individual, and hasshown an inclination, I notice. He would be certainly an admirable matchfor Vera, but...."
"Well?"
"She is so strange. Heaven knows how any one would dare, how any manwould woo her. He is splendid--well-established and rich. The wood aloneyields thousands."
"Is the Forester young, educated, a man that counts?"
Vassilissa entered and announced Paulina Karpovna.
"The evil one himself has brought her," grumbled Tatiana Markovna. "Showher in, and be quick with breakfast."