walking around with these people. What did we think others were going to say? “Dime con quien andas y te diré quién eres”. So I guess the moral of the story is that whether or not we wanted to hear this, we needed to hear it because as we got older it helped us make better decisions when it came to our relationships with others. So I guess I’ll leave you with another of her famous sayings, “El que no coge consejos, no llega a viejo”, translated "Advice when most needed is less heeded". You were right, Ma. You were right.
Death & Grief
Deeply affecting, life changing, emotionally draining the death of your loved one. You took it for granted she would be here - much longer than she was.
She bore you, nurtured you. She provided shelter and open arms to run to. She wisely let you fall. Life’s lessons you would learn.
Her death now rips through your soul, makes a hole too immense to repair. It causes pain so great, so indescribable. Like a tsunami, it swallows you up. Grieve a loss that can never be replaced.
No more sympathy when I hear of loss. I now feel deep, profound empathy. I feel the pain, I bear the grief, I know the fears. I too have walked that road.
Interminable is the anguish of grief, lasting is the sorrow and solace…oh, so fleeting. When does it end? Will there be release? Can I endure it?
Time heals all wounds. Does it? How long will it take? How will I know? What sees you through this? recollections fill my soul.
Solace for me - knowing she is no longer in pain. Her tears are no more, her suffering over. Gone, but not forgotten, death and grief temporal, memories everlasting.
Death is a Veil
Death is a veil. It obscures the what was of a life defined by pain and suffering difficulties in life remembered now no more.
Death is a veil. It filters out the sighs, the regrets, blotting out the brusque, obliterating the disappointments, illuminating the pleasures.
Death is a veil. For it helps us now perceive beyond the physical who was to the memory of a good, beneficent, cherished loved one.
Seen now through this veil, it is her legacy of kindness that remains forevermore. Rest in peace, dear one… Rest in peace
I Remember Her as a Fighter
I remember her as a fighter. You know the no-nonsense type, the kind that wouldn’t take "BS" from anybody. She could be feisty, abrupt and brusque at times but never without reason. She never considered herself smart yet many thought she was brilliant. She could find solutions to any problem, especially those that directly affected her or those closest to her. If the phone line went dead, she’d go to the neighbor’s house and use their phone to call the phone company. If she got the run-around, she’d demand to speak to the President. That technique never failed. “Go straight to the top!” she’d say and it always worked, service was always restored.
I remember her as a fighter. When she saw someone in need, she couldn’t resist trying to find a way to help them. I saw her bring homeless people into her home on Thanksgiving, welcoming them in, having them sit at the table, breaking bread with men and women that didn’t even have a place to lay their head at night. She made these people her mission, made them feel special and worthy. She fought to restore their dignity in her own humble way.
I remember her as a fighter. She hated excuses because she had endured struggles her whole life. As an immigrant to this country, she had suffered extreme prejudi
ce in spite of her green eyes and fair skin. I guess her accent gave her away. She wanted to be a model in her youth. She could’ve been - she was so beautiful. But the moment she opened her mouth to speak, it all fell apart. Even in her community, she experienced discrimination, mostly because she did not look like a typical Latina. She described it as one of the worst experiences of her life. Reverse prejudice she called it. Ignored and mistreated because of the color of her skin. It was a sad and demeaning experience that made her stronger and even more determined. It gave her resolve and motivation. She never wanted to hear you say, “I can’t do it.” You had to try because you didn’t want to disappoint her.
I remember her as a fighter. She wasn’t afraid of challenges. In her case, she was a jack of all trades or is it a Jill of all trades? She needed to work and she wanted to work and she did what she had to do to put food on the table. I remember her working in a photo factory, as a butcher in a supermarket, as a teacher’s aide in a public school and lastly as a salesperson in a small retail shop. She never finished high school but she did manage to get her