Chapter Ten
The spring ocean breeze gently caressed my face as I smiled at what my God had done in my life. I felt light all around me during the darkest time in my life. It wasn’t until I surrendered everything into His care that I knew He was all I had ever needed. It didn’t matter that I had lost my job, there was sure to be another one around the corner. It didn’t matter that Kevin despised me for what he had done; I was still Sean’s mother no matter what he said. And that was a fact that neither he nor some agency could ever take away from me. I know that with total assurance now.
I now believe that the truth will indeed make you free. I embraced the Truth, and it was like every shackle that attempted to bring me down broke away. For the first time in my life, I spiritually saw things that I was never able to with my natural eyes and ironically saw some things naturally that I couldn’t spiritually.
As I sat on that sand dune covered in peace I hadn’t felt in a long time, my cell phone rang. I peered down at it and saw Kevin’s number scroll across the screen. At first I figured that it must’ve been the devil tempting me already when I hadn’t been saved thirty minutes yet, but then I thought about my baby and answered the call.
“Hello?”
“Hey Melinda.” Kevin’s voice didn’t have its usual stench to it.
“Hi Kevin,” I cordially responded. “To what do I owe this honor?”
“Let’s not go there.” He paused. “Uh look, I’m calling because Sean keeps asking about you.”
“Is he okay?”
“Yeah, yeah, he’s fine. He wanted to talk to you, so I figured I’d give you a call and let you talk to him.”
I almost couldn’t believe my ears. Kevin is calling me so that I could talk to our son?
“Mel, I know things ended badly between us, but I just want you to know that I don’t think you would ever do anything to intentionally hurt Sean.”
“Really?”
“Yeah really, I do.” Kevin sighed, and continued, “And I’ll do whatever it takes to get you cleared of any abuse charges.”
“What?” I questioned, wondering if he was for real.
“I guess I’m in the forgiving mood.” He chuckled and his baritone voice tickled my ears. “I guess all Easter messages kind of do that to a person.”
“Sometimes it does more.” I glanced at the glass vodka bottle I had emptied onto the parking lot asphalt. “So, can I talk to Sean?”
“Sure, he’s in the living room. And if you wanted to spend some time with him later at your mother’s, you know, like you always do on Easter with the rest of your family, I’ll drop him off for a few hours and pick him up later.”
“Really?” I was taken aback. This had to be God.
“Why do you keep asking me that? Yes, really.” He had a smile in his voice. “Anyway, let me get him for you. Hold on a sec.” There was a brief pause, and then I heard Kevin say, “Sean, your mother is on the phone.”
Seconds later, Sean’s innocent little boy voice called my name as if to question if it were truly me, “Mommy?”
“Yes, baby.”
“Mommy, I miss you so much!”
His love made me beam ear to ear. “I miss you too, Sean.”
“When can I come home?” he quickly asked.
“Soon baby, but I tell you what, I’ll bring your little Spiderman over to Grandma’s and we can have dinner together.”
That seemed to make his day, and when I called my mother to tell her that I loved her, it seemed to make hers. I waited a few days before I told her what had happened on Good Friday, but I couldn’t hold my peace when it came to sharing what had happened that early Sunday morning.
Months went by and Kevin was just as sincere as he was the day Jesus saved my life. When I saw the last of Sasha Turner, I was so relieved, but even beyond that, I had my little boy free and clear. It amazed me that Kevin didn’t fight my having primary custody of Sean, but I later found out that things hadn’t worked out between him and Lisa as planned.
It was strange when he finally apologized and stopped blaming me for his cheating. Ironically, he discovered that Lisa was carrying another man’s baby. When the child was supposedly born premature, weighing nine pounds and five ounces, Kevin knew what was up. He immediately petitioned for a paternity test that proved that he was not the father.
I could have gloated in his misfortune, but really what would that have proven? That I was right? He already knew that. Not to mention that we still have our child to raise together. It never felt good to see Sean witness our arguments, no matter how hard we tried to “work things out” in another room. A child can feel when the atmosphere isn’t right. And resentment was something that I never wanted Sean to grow up with, not for me nor for his father.
Even my mother rallied to my side with more support. I’m sure it was because I had finally committed my life to Christ. After learning about how much pain I was in, Mama admitted that she had somehow placed church work over God’s work. They’re both important, but Mama confessed that after Daddy died she tried to do the work of two people, his and hers. It was comforting to hear her acknowledge that God has called us to help others and if that meant missing a church meeting to tend to a sick family member or feed the homeless, then so be it.
What would have happened if I had broken my leg and needed medical attention? Mama told me that she realized that my spirit was broken and I needed spiritual guidance. She told me that she thanked God for sparing my life because if I had killed myself, she wasn’t sure how she would’ve dealt with it.
Today, we all have healthy relationships: me and my mom, me and my siblings, me and my ex, and me and my two good friends, Farrah and Charlotte—who just happened to be my sister-in-law. We don’t have perfect relationships, but definitely healthy ones. We talk about our problems, we make time for one another, and we love unconditionally ... especially now that I’ve allowed true love back into my heart.
A year later on the anniversary of rededicating my life to Christ, I can still say that there is no love like God’s. It’s not because He gave me a better job than the last one where I now work with my aunt who I thought had given up on her dream of owning a consignment shop. It’s not because I now live in a house where only my name is on the deed. It is because He opened my eyes and removed the blinding scales. He wanted me to truly live, not merely exist. And to think that He sent an angel named Vita whose very name means life.
I know love, real love, because I personally know the One who is love.