Read One Foot in the Grave Page 7


  “Yummy,” Felicity purred again.

  I pitied the man. She’d probably feel him up under the table before the toasts even began.

  Randy’s brother Philip poked his head in. “Are you ready, Denise?”

  She turned to me with barely contained excitement.

  “Let’s go get me married!”

  I smiled at Philip. “We’ll meet you in front.”

  Denise eschewed the traditional wedding march for a lovely instrumental ballad. Instead of the ushers escorting each bridesmaid down the aisle, Randy and the groomsmen were waiting in front. The bridesmaids would walk down one at a time in pecking order. As the maid of honor, I was last before Denise. I fluffed the train of her dress one final time before taking my place in the entranceway.

  As I stepped into the room where the forty-five family and friends were gathered, I felt a wave of pure inhuman power. Motherfucker, one of the guests was a vampire. They’d better be planning on only eating cake, or I would have to get real frisky with the silverware. That would be a neat trick, slaughtering a guest at the reception without anyone noticing. My eyes swept the crowd from right to left, seeking out the source.

  My mother sat next to Noah, whom Denise had invited before I could tell her that I was trying to break things off between us. Noah smiled at me as I walked down the narrow aisle. I smiled back and took inventory in a military manner. Bride’s side of the room, clear. Groom’s side of the room, clear. For some reason, it didn’t occur to me to look at the front where the wedding party stood. Even when I did, it took a second for recognition to register in my suddenly paralyzed mind.

  His hair was different. Honey-brown instead of the platinum blond from my memory. It was also longer than before, curling over his ears instead of hugging his head like a sleek helmet. Pale skin glittered against the ebony fabric of his tuxedo, such a creamy breathtaking contrast. Eyes so deep brown they were nearly black bored into mine with none of the shock I felt.

  Objects in motion stay in motion with the same speed and in the same direction unless acted upon by an unbalanced force. I proved Newton’s Law of Inertia, because even though my breath caught and my heart skipped a beat, I somehow managed to keep walking down the aisle.

  Bones’s gaze devoured mine. Inside me a completely unfamiliar sensation exploded, taking my lagging mind a second to diagnose it. Joy. Pure, unadulterated joy flooded me. I was actually about to spring forward and hurtle myself in his arms, when I stopped myself.

  What was Bones doing here? And why didn’t he look surprised to see me?

  That froze me from any craziness, like flinging myself at him as I’d been tempted to do. If Bones wasn’t surprised to see me, then he knew I’d be here. But how did he know that? And the most important questions—How did he find me? What did he want?

  Now wasn’t the time to find out. This was Denise’s wedding. I wouldn’t ruin it by causing a scene. Thank God and all his saints, I thought, that my mother isn’t looking closely at the groomsmen. She’d have no hesitation about ruining Denise’s day in a spectacular way. Whatever Bones had in mind, I’d deal with him after the wedding.

  Or I’d pass out. Whichever came first.

  Without further drama, I took my place by Felicity. She leaned over and hissed in my ear as Denise began her walk down the aisle.

  “Don’t even think about the hottie; I call dibs.”

  “Shut up,” I replied, too low for the guests to overhear. My palms were sweating and my knees felt like jelly. How was I ever going to make it through this wedding? Bones’s nearness was unbelievable. For four and a half years I had dreamed about him, and now I could reach out and touch him. It didn’t even seem real.

  Randy took Denise from her father’s arm, and they held hands. The appointed justice began the modified version of the wedding vows sans religious references. Bones turned and faced the man when the rest of the groomsmen did.

  The ceremony was a blur. I had to be nudged by Felicity to accept Denise’s bouquet when it was time for the ring exchange. When the justice finally pronounced them man and wife, I was relieved. How terrible of me. This was my best friend’s wedding, and all I wanted was for it to be over so I could have a moment to pull myself together.

  Denise and Randy ascended back up the aisle, and I nearly ran when it was my turn to follow them. Philip tried to restrain me to a sedate walk, but I yanked on his arm to speed him up.

  “I have to go to the bathroom,” I lied in desperation. What I had to do was take a moment alone to recover my blasted equilibrium. “Tell Noah not to wait for me; I’ll go straight to do the pictures afterward.”

  As soon as we left the sanctuary, I bolted for the ladies’ room, my flower bouquet forgotten on the ground where I’d dropped it.

  The bathroom was on the other side of the club. Once inside, I sank to the floor by the sink. Oh God, oh God, seeing him made every emotion I’d tried to forget come roaring back with pitiless intensity. I had to get control of myself. Fast. My head fell onto my bent knees.

  “Hallo, Kitten.”

  I was so preoccupied with my breakdown that I didn’t hear Bones come in. His voice was as smooth as I’d remembered, that English accent just as enticing. I snapped my head up, and in the midst of my carefully constructed life crashing around me, found the most absurd thing to worry about.

  “God, Bones, this is the ladies’ room! What if someone sees?”

  He laughed, a low, seductive ripple of the air. Noah had kissed me with less effect.

  “Still a prude? Don’t fret—I locked the door behind me.”

  If that was supposed to ease my tension, it had the opposite result. I sprang to my feet, but there was nowhere to run. He blocked the only exit.

  “Look at you, luv. Can’t say I prefer the brown hair, but as for the rest of you…you’re luscious.”

  Bones traced the inside of his lower lip with his tongue as his eyes slid all over me. Their heat seemed to rub my skin. When he took a step closer, I flattened back against the wall.

  “Stay where you are.”

  He leaned nonchalantly against the countertop. “What are you all lathered about? Think I’m here to kill you?”

  “No. If you were going to kill me, you wouldn’t have bothered with the altar ambush. You obviously know what name I’m going under, so you would have just gone for me one night when I came home.”

  He whistled appreciatively. “That’s right, pet. You haven’t forgotten how I work. Do you know I was offered a contract on the mysterious Red Reaper at least three times before? One bloke had half-a-million bounty for your dead body.”

  Well, not a surprise. After all, Lazarus had tried to cash a check on my ass for the same reason. “What did you say, since you’ve just confirmed you’re not here for that?”

  Bones straightened, and the bantering went out of him. “Oh, I said yes, of course. Then I hunted the sods down and played ball with their heads. The calls quit coming after that.”

  I swallowed at the image he described. Knowing him, it was exactly what he’d done.

  “So, then, why are you here?”

  He smiled and came nearer, ignoring my previous order.

  “Not happy to see me after all these years? Do you know why I wanted to catch you unawares? So I could see your eyes, and know what you felt in that very instant.”

  Danger. Danger. Less than a foot separated us. I’d never been able to resist him touching me, and I wasn’t about to test my willpower now. Frantically I tried to think of a way to distract him.

  “Have you met my boyfriend?”

  There. That was a doozy. His eyes narrowed, and his lips thinned into a tight line. Yep, Noah was a mood kill for both of us.

  I pressed my advantage. Peril before passion; it was safer. “Just how did you weasel into Randy’s life to become a groomsman in this wedding, anyhow? Find out my best friend was marrying him? You must have mind-fucked him quick. They were only engaged a month.”

  He pointed a finger
near my face. “Your man Randy I’ve known for six months. Long before Denise met him. Unusual bloke, don’t you agree? You know what his first words were to me, after we sat side by side for an hour in a bar? He said, ‘I hope this won’t be engraved on my headstone, but you haven’t breathed this whole time. Care to tell me how you do that?’”

  I blinked. Denise had once said Randy thought outside the box. Way outside the box, it appeared. And I’d underestimated the size of his balls.

  “He knows what you are?”

  Bones nodded. “I gave him a peep of the eyes, you know, with the green lights on, and told him he hadn’t seen anything. He blinked at me the same way you just did and asked me if that was supposed to work.”

  Now I was really impressed. Randy had a natural immunity to vampire power, even from someone as strong as Bones.

  “Obviously that was unexpected. I struck up a conversation with him and we became chummy. It wasn’t until this week, after I’d accepted my position in his wedding, that he met me at a bar with your scent all over him. You’d helped him move furniture that day.”

  I was relieved, yet at the same time hurt to think seeing Bones was only due to happenstance.

  “So running into you is just a coincidence? You’ve, ah, gotten over what happened before?”

  He locked his eyes with mine. “Wouldn’t you like to know? But I don’t believe I’m going to tell you. You can stew about it, like I’ve had to stew ever since I got your bloody Dear John note. I will tell you this, though—we have unfinished business between us. And we’re damn sure going to sort it out no matter how much you’d rather avoid it.”

  Oh shit. I’d left him with a note before because I knew I couldn’t face him and tell him goodbye. Now four years later, I still didn’t think I was strong enough.

  “Cather—, er, Cristine! Are you in there?”

  My mother knocked loudly on the door, and I sagged in relief. For once I was glad she was there.

  Bones’s mouth twitched. “I think I’ll just pay my respects to your mum, Kitten. Been a while.”

  “Don’t you—!”

  The threat I’d been about to utter died on my lips as he opened the door. She looked at him in bewilderment for a second before recognition dawned. Then her face went purple.

  “You! You!”

  “Lovely to see you again, Justina,” Bones said devilishly. “You look very fetching in that shade.”

  “You filthy animal!” she raged. “Every night I prayed that you were dead and rotting in hell!”

  “Mother!” I said curtly. Absence hadn’t made her heart grow fonder.

  Bones shrugged. “You should have spoken up a bit. The Almighty must not have heard you.”

  I pointed a finger at the door. “Bones, whatever you want to say to me can wait until this wedding is over. That’s my friend and yours out there, waiting for us to get pictures with them, and that’s what we’re going to do. Mother, you make one fucking peep to trash Denise’s wedding, and I swear to God I’ll let him bite you.”

  “Happy to oblige, Kitten,” he assured me.

  I jerked my head at the door again. “Out!”

  “Ladies.” He nodded and sauntered off.

  I watched him leave before going to the sink and splashing water onto my face. After all, I had to look pretty for the pictures.

  ELEVEN

  MY MOTHER NEEDED SEVERAL MORE DIRE warnings before she agreed not to do anything to disrupt the reception. Or notify my work about Bones. I had flatly promised to change myself into a vampire on the spot if she did either.

  “That’s what he wants from you, Catherine. He wants to steal your soul and turn you into a beast,” she said for the third time as she escorted me into the hall.

  “Well, then, you’ll bear that in mind and keep your mouth shut, won’t you? And for God’s sake, call me Cristine. Can you be more obvious?”

  We reached the door. Denise abandoned the pose she had with Randy and met us at the entrance.

  “Oh, Cat, I didn’t know that Randy’s friend was…” She lowered her voice. “A vampire! But don’t worry. I talked to Randy. He was amazed I knew they existed, too! We have so much in common. Anyhow, Randy swears he’s harmless. Says he’s known him for months.”

  My mother looked at Denise like she’d grown three heads.

  “Harmless?! We aren’t talking about a dog that may or may not bite! We are talking about a murderer—”

  “Ahem,” I interrupted, stroking my neck for emphasis. She closed her mouth and stalked off. Farther away I heard Bones snort with laughter. He’d been listening.

  “It’s okay, Denise,” I reassured her. “He knows as long as he keeps his fangs clean, we won’t have any problems.”

  “How does he know that?” she asked practically. “Did you talk to him? You were in the bathroom awhile and I didn’t see him. Did you corner him?”

  The other way around. “Um, well, kind of…er,” I stammered, something I hadn’t done in years. “I know him. I mean, I’ve seen him around before. Around Virginia, that is. He, uh, he and I have an understanding. He doesn’t mess with me and I don’t mess with him.”

  Denise accepted it at face value. “Well, then let’s go get pictures. I’m glad you two aren’t going to fight. Tell him not to mention anything about you to Randy, okay? Your boss would lose all the hairs off his balls if he found out how many people knew about you.”

  “Well put.” Well put, indeed.

  Bones was Felicity’s mysterious wedding partner. She was delighted, managing to squeeze herself indecently next to him in every shot. To make matters worse, he was being charming. I could have cheerfully killed them both after the pictures.

  But I couldn’t show how much it bothered me for the same reason I hadn’t run into Bones’s arms when I first saw him. No matter what my feelings were, nothing about our circumstances had changed. So I couldn’t afford to let him know how much I still cared. All I could do was play it cool—and hope Bones bought the act enough to leave me this time.

  I made a beeline for the bar right after the last click of the camera. There was only one thing that could help with tonight, and that was gin. Lots of gin. I downed the first glass without budging in front of the bartender.

  “Another one.”

  The bartender made an inquiring face but poured another gin and tonic. I eyed the level he selected and gave him a dirty look.

  “More alcohol,” I said succinctly.

  “Drowning your sorrows?” a familiar voice behind me mocked.

  “None of your business,” I replied, straightening.

  “There you are, darling!”

  Noah came over and gave me a peck on the cheek. Bones tightened his lips into a grim line as he watched.

  “Um, Noah…I’ll show you to your table.” I wanted to get him away from Bones, who was looking at Noah like he’d rather drink from his neck than what the bar had to offer.

  I saw Noah to his seat, since I was sitting separately at the head table with the rest of the bridal party. My mother pulled me aside as soon as I left Noah. Her face was florid.

  “Do you know what that beast did when you walked away from him at the bar? He winked at me!”

  Caught off guard, I laughed. God, that was priceless. She must have had steam coming out of her ears.

  “You think that’s funny?” she irrationally demanded.

  “Well, Mom, he risked his life for you, and then you tried your damnedest to have him killed. He may not like you.”

  I spoke low but flippantly, not concerned over Bones’s actions with her. He would never hurt her, I knew, but she definitely had some needling coming. God only knew what I had coming.

  There were place cards at the head table, which was one long, rectangular thing that would have everyone facing the reception room. I sat at the one marked Cristine Russell. Randy sat to my left, with Denise to his right. To my right read Chris Pin. Who…?

  “You’ve got to be kidding me,” I said aloud. W
hy didn’t I just shoot myself and get it over with?

  “Justina, we meet again.” Bones appeared and took his seat next to me as I vaulted out of my chair. “Wouldn’t want to be rude, but I believe your table is over there.”

  He inclined his head to where Noah sat, oblivious to the drama.

  “There you are!” Felicity squealed. She grabbed Bones by the arm and smiled at him. “You and I are paired together for the night, so no more running off! I hope you dance as great as you look.”

  “Slut,” I muttered, but not softly enough.

  “What was that?” she asked, still blinking coyly up at Bones.

  “Er, good luck.” My voice rose to a normal level and I backed away.

  Felicity looked smug. “I don’t need luck.”

  I downed my gin and then headed, again, for the bar. My mother glared at Bones as she followed after me.

  “Oh, Ms. Russell,” Bones called out. I froze. His emphasis on my fake last name was deliberate. Then again, what had I expected? I’d taken Bones’s real surname as my alias; did I think he wouldn’t notice? Or comment? “Would you be a luv and get me a drink? You remember my preference, I’m sure.”

  A slew of curses went through my mind, but I took a deep breath and reminded myself to stay calm. Denise was my best friend. She deserved a lovely reception, not a bloodbath.

  “That filthy, lecherous—” my mother began.

  “Stuff it.” We reached the bar. I gave the poor attendant behind it a murderous look. “Tall glass. All gin. Don’t even think about commenting.”

  His face blanched but he poured to my specifications. I took a long swallow before adding, “Oh yeah. And a fucking whiskey, neat.”

  TWELVE

  FELICITY TOOK ONE LOOK AT THE HALF-EMPTY pilsner glass of gin I returned with and gasped.

  “Cristine, can’t you keep a lid on your drinking? This is my cousin’s wedding, for heaven’s sake!”