The young woman turns around in the front seat. “Bleu didn’t mention she was expecting. But it’s best she didn’t. Torrence wouldn’t have stopped until he was certain he had beaten those babies out of her along with any chance to conceive more in the future.”
I look at this petite woman in the front seat of my car. The top of her blond head is barely visible over the seat from where I’m sitting in the floorboard.
“Who are you?” I demand.
“Lainie.” She hesitates before saying the rest. “Grieve. Before you ask, yes. I’m Torrence’s wife. But not by choice. He’s a monster who held me prisoner in that place for the last two months.”
Lainie bursts into tears. “Bleu said you would help me and you did. You’ll never know how grateful I am. Thank you so much.”
I’m not often shocked but Lainie Grieve has just managed to do so. And while I have many questions about what’s happening within The Order, it’s not my focus right now.
We arrive at the hospital’s emergency services entrance. “I have to walk away at this point,” Jamie says. “I can’t risk being seen with you. Some of the people from my medical program like asking too many questions.”
Jamie’s right. My face was all over the news after my arrest. Being seen with me will bring up issues he might not be able to explain away. “Of course.”
“Sterling. Go inside and fetch help.”
Jamie opens the door to get out. “Call as soon as you know anything.”
I remain next to my wife while we wait for help to arrive at the car.
I don’t know what has happened to Lainie, but I suspect her face isn’t the only thing damaged. “You need to be examined.”
She nods, tears cascading down her crumpled, bruised face. “My head hurts. So much.” Her whole body shakes, though from fear or pain, I don’t know.
“They’ll have to report your attack to the police. I don’t care what kind of statement you give as long as it doesn’t include me or The Fellowship.”
“I was assaulted by an unknown attacker. I didn’t see his face,” she says. I suspect this isn’t her first time to tell that story. “I’ll enter the hospital separately so they don’t make the connection.”
“That’s probably best.”
“Thank you for rescuing me from that monster.” Those are her last words before getting out and disappearing.
A swarm of medical personnel surround the car. They slide a board beneath Bleu’s body and transfer her limp form to a waiting gurney. “Sir, is this your wife?”
“Yes. She’s pregnant with twins. Six weeks.”
I see the looks exchanged when they note the extensive blood on her clothing. “We’re going to take good care of her. And your babies.”
* * *
My mum stays with me while Bleu’s gone for tests. First, they must ensure she has not sustained damage to her head, neck, or spine. Thankfully, they rule out any neurological problems but I’m still concerned. It’s been hours and she remains unconscious.
The doctor and nurses assure me they see no reason she won’t wake on her own soon but it’s unsettling to see her lying in what appears to be a comatose state.
The ultrasound is last and they won’t allow me to be present when it’s done. I have no idea if our babies survived. When I ask, the nurse tells me the doctor will be in to discuss the findings. I think they would’ve told me if everything was all right, so I assume he’ll be delivering bad news.
I need my mother’s advice. “The first thing Bleu’s going to ask when she wakes is if the babies are okay. How the hell am I going to tell her they’re not?”
Mum halts the crocheting project on her lap. “Bleeding isn’t supposed to occur during pregnancy so when it does, expectant parents panic. The amount of blood seems like much more than it actually is. I know because it happened when I was pregnant with your brother. I was certain I was miscarrying. As you know, I didn’t so you must believe that all is well with them until you know otherwise.”
My mum returns to crocheting. I think she’s doing it as a distraction. She’s only half-finished with the piece but I can clearly make out what it’s going to be—a baby blanket. Seeing it makes all of this surreal.
I’ve never lost children before. I only know one way to be ready for it. “I’m preparing myself for the worst.”
“There are plenty of situations where that’s an appropriate attitude but parenting isn’t one of them. You prepare for the best by hoping for it.”
Mum holds up her crocheting project. “I’m already done with the first blanket. This one should be finished by tomorrow. All I’ll need to do is add the pink or blue ribbons after we find out what they are.”
“I went back to the office right after we found out about the twins. I don’t even know what Bleu wants. Boys? Girls? A combo?”
“She’ll be happy with whatever you get.”
I left her at home alone. “This was my fault, Mum. Torrence took her because of me. We could lose our babies because of what I did.”
“You can’t think like that, son.”
“She has every right to blame me if they don’t make it.”
There’s a knock at the door, and then it opens. “Hello, Mr. Breckenridge.” Bleu’s obstetrician.
I’m numb as the doctor introduces himself. All I can think of is the news he’s about to give us. “There are concerns we need to discuss but I know your immediate question for me is the condition of the pregnancy. Let me start by saying that we detected two heartbeats on ultrasound.”
Oh, thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
My mum releases a sigh of relief. “I knew our babies would be okay. I told you, didn’t I?”
“As an OB/GYN, I’ll only address your wife’s health from an obstetrical and gynecological standpoint. I found significant bruising on her inner thighs. Because Mrs. Breckenridge remains unconscious and can’t tell us what happened, I had to follow protocol, which means examining her for sexual assault. I’m happy to report that I found no evidence supporting that.”
I didn’t allow myself to wonder about it because to do so meant it was a possibility.
“Moving on to the pregnancy. The babies look stable. But as you know, your wife has had a very significant bleeding episode. The trauma to her abdomen caused a marginal tear in the edge of the placenta. That means it has a slight separation from the womb. But the bleeding has stopped. We’ll keep her hydrated and on bed rest and see what happens.”
I wonder if “see what happens” is an official medical prognosis. “Do you think our babies will be all right?”
“All we can do is watch and wait.”
* * *
Bleu moans off and on but it’s more than two hours after the obstetrician’s visit before she finally stirs for the first time. “Bonny.”
I squeeze her hand and her eyelids flutter. She struggles to open her eyes because they’re so swollen. When she does, they’re slits. “Ahh. There’s my sweet Bonny’s baby blues.”
She blinks lazily. “Hi,” I say.
Her eyes flicker several more times, I think trying to focus on my face.
“Hi,” she whispers. Her simple one-word greeting is music to my ears.
“How do you feel?”
She closes her eyes. “Nauseated. I think I’m going to be sick.”
My mum moves faster than lightning with the little bucket they left for such a thing. “It’s all right if ye get sick.”
Mum points to the drawer where the linens are kept. “Wet a washcloth with cold water for her face.”
I scramble to the small sink in the tight washroom, wet the cloth, and hand it back to my mother, my own hands shaking. Mum places the wet cloth against Bleu’s forehead. “There, love. This’ll help ye feel better.”
A few seconds later, Bleu rises in the bed and moans loudly while dry heaving into the basin my mum is holding. Once. Twice. Three times.
Very few areas of her body are free of bruising. She must be in t
errible pain.
“Oh!” Bleu’s eyes grow large when she wretches the last time. “I just felt something come out down there.”
Mum pulls the covers back for a look. “It’s just a little blood. That’s all.”
“Why am I bleeding?” Bleu’s hand goes to her stomach. “Oh God. I lost the babies.”
Worry can’t be good for her or them. I need to reassure her everything is all right. “You had some bleeding but both babies are okay. They did an ultrasound and saw two heartbeats.”
“I’m going to fetch the nurse. She needs to know Bleu is awake so she can assess her and call the doctor.”
I bring Bleu’s hand to my mouth for a kiss. “This is all my fault, Bonny. I’m so sorry I didn’t protect you and our children.”
She’s sobbing, tears rolling from the corners of her eyes on to the pillow beneath her head. “I’m bleeding. Does that mean I’m going to lose them?”
“The doctor says they look stable.”
She strains to sit up and winces. “Oh my God. It hurts.”
“What hurts? Where?”
“Everywhere.”
I feel helpless. I can’t make this better for her.
“Mum went to get a nurse. We’ll ask her to get you something for pain.”
The nurse comes quickly but is taking forever to assess Bleu. “She’s in agony. Can you give her something and then do this?”
“I’m sorry. I can’t do that, Mr. Breckenridge, but I promise I’m hurrying.”
I’m not at all pleased by how long it takes Bleu to get medication but I can tell when it begins to work. She’s much more relaxed. “Feeling better?”
“A little, but this is going to hurt like hell for a while.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“At least the narcotics help.”
“No. I mean I’m sorry this happened. It’s all my fault.”
“You didn’t do this to us. Torrence Grieve is to blame.”
“I left my pregnant wife at home without protection while I knew that my enemy was lying in wait. I was foolish and careless with the people I love most in this world. There’s no excuse.” I clasp her hand tightly. “Can you forgive me?”
“I thought I was fine and could protect myself. But I guess I’m not invincible. I think we both learned valuable lessons.” That can’t be the extent of how she feels. Maybe her mood is altered by what they gave her for pain.
She has sleepy eyes. “It’s all right if you want to take a nap.”
“I’m so tired.” Her voice is slowed.
“Go to sleep. I’ll be by your side. I’m not going anywhere.”
“Maybe just a little snooze.”
Bleu shuts her swollen eyes for less than a minute before they pop open. “Lainie! I promised we’d take her away from that place!”
“We brought her with us.”
“Where is she?”
“She was in bad shape and needed to be examined.”
“Is she all right?”
“I don’t know.”
“No one is with her?” Bleu is alarmed.
“I guess not.”
“Someone from The Fellowship needs to be with her in case Torrence or one of his minions comes for her.”
“I can assure you that Grieve won’t be coming for her.”
“You killed him. I’m glad.”
I’ve never been more pleased by a person’s death. “Aye. And the other two who beat you. Killing Torrence was the best move I could’ve made for us and our people.”
“But the others could come for Lainie.”
“Bonny. She’s Order. Our enemy. It’s not our job to protect Lainie from her own people. I wouldn’t have taken her out of there if I’d known who she was.”
“But they’re horrible people.”
“True, but members of The Order are part of that circle by choice.”
“Not Lainie. Her parents traded her to Torrence for money and power. She tried to escape and he locked her in that cabin. She’s been there for two months. He’s been raping her so she’d become pregnant with his child.”
At the very least I owe Lainie my help and support since Jason’s death set off a firestorm that has severely impacted her life. And I mustn’t forget she tried to help my wife and took a beating for it. “Mitch is in the waiting room. I’ll send him to sit with her for now. We’ll figure out the rest later.”
“Thank you.”
The door to Bleu’s hospital room should be swapped out for one that will revolve. A parade of no fewer than a half-dozen doctors pass through it over the next couple of hours. Like clockwork, one leaves and another enters within fifteen minutes. It’s much the same with our friends and family. The Fellowship wants to show their support for their leader and his wife.
But Bleu is exhausted. I see it in her heavy lids. It’s time for all visitors to go. Even Lorna and Westlyn, although I know it won’t be easy.
“Bleu’s too nice to say it so I’m going to do it for her. You’ve done an excellent job of seeing to her every need. But she’s really tired and needs her rest.”
“Maybe we can step out for a while,” Westlyn says.
Lorna nods in agreement. “We’ll sit in the waiting room.”
Stepping out to the waiting room means they’ll be back in a little while. “I’m here to take care of her, so go home. You can come back tomorrow after she’s rested.”
I don’t give them a choice. I can tell they don’t like it much but they do as I tell them.
It’s finally the two of us. “Thank you for doing that.”
“All part of a husband’s dirty job.”
She lifts the covers. “I want to be close to you. Come lie next to me while I sleep.”
I kick off my shoes and slide in beside my wife. I’m forced to leave my prosthesis on, something I never do when I get into bed.
We lie on our sides spooning. “It’s all right for you to be angry with me about what happened. I promised to keep you safe and I didn’t. I deserve every bit of your fury.”
She sighs. “I never once thought I needed you to safeguard me. I fancied myself doing you a favor by agreeing to let you play the part of my protector. But I had it all wrong. I’m tough but I put myself in danger by not seeing my own weaknesses.” She curls into me like a frightened child. “I can’t believe I was so wrong.”
She’s trembling so I tighten my hold. “I’m so sorry. I swear that will never happen again. Things are going to be different when we go home. When I’m away, you and the babies will have a minimum of two bodyguards at all times.”
“I can’t believe I’m about to say this, but I think I need that to feel safe again.”
My wife doesn’t feel safe. That breaks my heart because it’s a testament to the husband I’ve been. But I’m going to do everything in my power to gain her trust again.
“Debra called me right before The Order took me. She got the evidence we needed to prove Abram is innocent. At least of my mother’s murder. I’m sure he’s guilty of plenty of other offenses.”
I know Abram is capable of a lot but I never believed he was guilty of Amanda Lawrence’s murder. “How do you feel about that?”
“I should be happy your uncle didn’t kill my mother. But I’m not. I hate him.”
She should. He’s done terrible things to her. “Abram is finished badgering you. I’ll see to that personally.”
There’s a knock at the door. When it doesn’t open right away, I know it’s not a doctor or nurse. They don’t wait for an invitation to enter.
I told my people no interruptions. I was very clear about it. And now someone is disrupting one of the most important conversations I’ve ever had with my wife.
“Hold on,” I snap. “Fuck!” I toss back the covers and swing my legs around to replace my shoes.
Bleu touches my back. “Don’t get up.”
I twist to kiss her forehead. “I’ll only be gone long enough to reprimand whoever this is disturbing us.”
I open the door and find Kyle, one of two men I’ve assigned to guard Bleu’s door. “I told you no disturbances. My wife needs rest,” I growl. What part of that does he not fucking understand?
“We have a problem, Sin. A big one,” he whispers.
Chapter Five
Bleu Breckenridge
“I need to step out with Kyle. I’ll only be a minute.”
“No.” I try to sit up but stop when the pain is too great. “Don’t go.”
“I’m not leaving you. I’ll just be right outside the door for a moment. Promise.”
Wrinkles crease Sin’s forehead. The deep ones only make an appearance when he’s worried. “Something’s wrong.”
“Fellowship business. Nothing for you to be concerned about. Rest and I’ll be back before you can miss me.”
He leaves, shutting the door behind him, not giving me the chance to argue further.
Rest? He has to be kidding. Like that’s going to happen when I know there’s a problem.
God, I hope nothing has happened to Lainie.
Sin returns and plants himself in the chair next to my bed. “I’m going to tell you what’s going on but do not get upset. It isn’t good for you or the babies.”
“Telling me to not get upset makes me get upset.”
“Ellison is in Edinburgh.”
“What! Why? It’s only been four days since we spoke. She doesn’t know this happened, does she?”
“I don’t think it has anything to do with your kidnapping. I’m inclined to think she’s here as a surprise.”
Shit. Talk about bad timing. “She’s going to have a come-apart when she finds out I’m in the hospital and haven’t called her.”
“She’s at Agnes’s because I can’t let her into our flat.” Right. That damn bloody message on the wall. She’d flip the fuck out if she saw it, as would any normal person.
“I have a crew working to erase all evidence of what happened. New paint in the living room. New furniture. But they’ll need at least a day to make it happen. What should we do with her in the meantime?”
There’s nothing to consider. “I don’t have a choice. I have to see her.” Like this.