“Find him innocent and have mercy on him. Blessed are the merciful: for they obtain mercy. Do not be afraid of what others might say about you for acquitting an innocent man. Blessed are they that suffer persecution for justice’s sake, for theirs is the kingdom of Heaven.
Chapter 90: Verdict
Guilty. We are all guilty. Each one of us, and God condemns the guilty.
Chapter 91: Parting
One of the guards let me speak with Jacob one last time before they took him to his cell.
“Do not be sad. I have accomplished what God wanted me to accomplish. I have served my purpose and completed my mission. I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith.”
“No, Jacob don’t give up, we can appeal, we can get you out of here.”
“No, it is God’s desire that I remain in prison. One who breaks an unjust law, and who willingly accepts the penalty of imprisonment in order to arouse the conscience of the community over the injustice, gives a great teaching to the world. It is from numberless diverse acts of courage and belief that human history is shaped. Each time a man stands up for an ideal or strikes out against injustice, he sends forth a tiny ripple of hope.”
“I can’t just leave you in jail. You are innocent and you deserve to be free to continue your teachings.”
“I am free. Stone walls do not a prison make, if I have freedom in my love and in my soul, I am free.”
“What about your work, what about the teaching of the truth?”
“Truth, crushed to earth shall rise again, it always does.”
I considered this in silence for a moment while Jacob gathered the strength to ask me a question.
“Where are you going?” he said.
“I am going out to the world. I will continue your work. Your message will continue and grow stronger.”
Jacob bowed his head, “Thank you my son. Be strong and of good courage. Wherever you go I am with you always even unto the end of the world. If I do not see you again on earth, we will meet again in a place where there is no darkness.”
“I know your teachings but is there anything else I should know?”
“You know it all. I kept back nothing that was helpful but proclaimed it to you and taught you all. Test everything, hold onto the good and you will do what is required of you. Take with you this final teaching and share it with the world, ‘Abhor what is evil, cling to what is good.’”
Chapter 92: Beauty
I look at the world through new eyes. Therefore, I will not grieve. Jacob is gone, but he has not failed. He accomplished what God wanted him to accomplish. He has overcome the world. April whispered this to me and I am done with sorrow.
Besides, on a beautiful day like this, no one could be sad. The world seems like such an ugly place, only because we never look around to see the beautiful and the good.
We must focus on that which is beautiful and good. Look at the beauty all around you. Our world is full of sound, our world is more lovely than anyone’s though we suffer and kill each other.
Follow me. Flee the works of man. In the works of man, everything is as poor as its author; vision is confined, means are limited, scope is restricted, movements are labored, and results are poor.
Flee the works of man. Seek out a quiet place to pray, visit, commune, and listen to our Father. There you will discover a quiet Garden of Eden. There you will find true life. There you will find tongues in trees, books in running brooks, sermons in stones, and good in everything.
Look. Listen. Understand. Our Lord has written the promises of resurrection, not in books alone but in every leaf of the springtime. God is small. Even on a single leaf of a tree, or a tender blade of grass, the awe-inspiring deity manifests itself. God is behind all-we find great things made of little things and the little go lessening till at last comes God behind them. Through unity, the small thing grows, through disunity the largest thing crumbles.
Live now, believe me, wait not till tomorrow, gather the roses of life today. Most people live lives of quiet desperation. Don’t be resigned to that. “I shall live” is not the saying of a wise man. This is your life and it’s ending one minute at a time. Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Tomorrow’s life is too late; live today. Live today, forget the cares of the past.
Go for it now. The future is promised to no one, but for now, the future is bright. The golden age is before us, not behind us. Nevertheless, you must hurry. Summer’s lease has all too short a date.
I hear shouts and see children playing down by a small pool. April has put a spirit of youth in everything.
Then I hear screams as the children throw rocks at one of their number. From the heart of the fountain of delight, wells up some bitter taste to choke hope even amid the flowers. Ours is a world of sweets and sours, our flowers are merely flowers. Every rose has its thorn. The rose and the thorn, and sorrow and gladness are linked together.
Then a miracle occurs. One of the children stops the others from throwing rocks. He comforts the injured child and all begin to play together again. Often the prickly thorn produces tender roses. Hope. We have become beautiful without our knowing it.
Our world is beautiful, but beauty is always subjective. What is beautiful is that which puts into material form a part of the hopes and dreams and feelings that lie within us. The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt with the heart.
Chapter 93: Beginning
And so, my friends, we have reached the end of our story. It is not really the end, for every ending must mix with a new beginning. Life begins perpetually, and is forever dying to be born afresh, forever young and eager. The sad and wonderful thing about life is that it goes on.
What have I discovered? I have discovered nothing. I have only found out what I knew. I understand the force that in the past gave me life and now too gives me life. I have been set free from falsity. I have found the truth.
What have I accomplished? Nothing. I sought to separate the good from the evil and to make the world a better place. I have failed. So far, I have failed. However, we become better through failure and time is infinite. I believe a day will come for sure when I will know the truth.
Mary and Simon come to me to say goodbye. “Good luck,” Simon says and walks away without looking back.
Mary looks at me with tears in her eyes. She is too proud to cry. She hugs me and whispers in my ear, “Remember me when I am gone away. Seni her zamam veya aslam seveceğim.”(I will always or never (sic) love you.)
We embrace. She puts her head on my shoulder.
“Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened,” I say.
She leaves. She does not look back. I want to call out to her, tell her I love her. I say nothing. I feel this is important in some way, but I am no prophet and here’s no great matter. Instead, I wipe away the stain of tears, the aftermath of almost too much love.
I say nothing and this is good. I pray for their happiness and that too is good.
I alone am left. Sometimes I think we could have gone on, all of us, trying forever, but it didn’t happen. They left me alone.
I am alone just as I was when I began this journey. Yet, I have changed. I am a part of all that I have met and they are part of me. Now, I do not fear to walk the lonely road which leads far out into the sullen night.
Alone, I will face the world. My only duty is to bless the world through what I am. I will test myself against the world and we shall see who will break first: I or the world.
I have faith that soon I will be joined by others. I believe, in fact, that the adventure of humanity is essentially an adventure of groups. When I am joined by others, we will face the world together. Then we shall see who breaks first: us or the world.
Right now, all I can do is be me, whoever that is. My past is gone, my present is passing, and my future is arriving. Yesterday is just a memory and tomorrow is never what it is supposed
to be. Nevertheless, I am not afraid of tomorrow, for I have seen yesterday and I love today.
It is now time to depart. Farewell, my friends. Remember today for it is the beginning of always. Today marks the start of a brave new future filled with all your dreams can hold. Think truly to the future and make those dreams come true. Set impossible goals and when it becomes obvious the goals cannot be reached, don’t adjust the goals, adjust your action steps.
Farewell, my friends. I know where I am going. Do you? Which of us is going to a better place is unknown to everyone but God. I’d love to change your world, but I don’t know how. I’ll leave that up to you. Do not be afraid. Throw yourself from the cliff, drown yourself in love, die a thousand times, but try to live. Who knows, you might just make it.
As I leave, I glance back, once, and watch Mary and Simon as they, hand in hand, with steps measured and slow, make their solitary way through Eden.
Etiam venio cito amen veni Domine Iesu
Terminat hora diem. Terminat author opus.
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