When he returned, he slid into bed and wrapped his arms around her. “How do you feel?”
“Like I’m floating.”
He chuckled softly and tapped the side of her head. “I mean inside. Are you okay with what we just did?”
“Oh, yes.”
“Are you sore at all?”
“Yes, but it's a good sore. I know you think it was just the heat, but I wanted it. I wanted you. I mean, I wanted you to be my first. I've thought about it since the day I met you.” The words were hard to get out, but she felt he needed to know that. Otherwise, it was as if she had just used him to scratch an itch, which seemed rude.
And so, so wrong.
“Onyx, I am so humbled that you feel that way. I won't deny that I have very strong feelings for you and probably have from the moment we met. I couldn’t act on them while you were my student. You understand?”
“I do. I'm sorry.”
He skimmed the back of his hand over her cheek, then nudged her chin up until she was looking him in the eye. “No, don't be sorry. I didn't mean it like that. I'm honored you wanted me to be your first.”
I'd like you to be my last.
Onyx was aware how insane that sounded, so she kept that thought to herself.
Even though the heat had abated, Onyx couldn't get enough of Cole. They stayed in bed for hours. Not from a frantic need to fuck. No, this was sweet kissing, fondling, and lazy discovery.
When they rolled out of bed to eat something, Cole spoke to her seriously. “We can't let anyone know you're here.”
“Don't worry, I don't want to get you in trouble with the school.” She was offended he thought she would be so stupid.
“No, not that. Your people will be looking for you,” he clarified.
“But no one will think to look for me here.”
“You've never mentioned me to anyone at home?” he asked with a note of surprise in his voice.
She blushed, then sobered. “Just my mother.”
He stroked his fingers over her cheek in that slow, comforting way she was starting to crave. “I'm sorry.”
“I can't understand why she always encouraged me to follow my dreams. She made sure I went to college, she wanted me to travel. Why did she tell me all those things, if she intended to force me to mate Denny and stay in Catcall?”
“I can't answer that, darling.”
Darling. He called her darling. She wanted to swoon.
Her last few minutes at home popped into her head. “My mother's journal. I brought it with me, it's in my backpack.”
He looked at her thoughtfully. “She kept a journal?”
“Yup. I found it by accident right before I left. I think Marie and Wilson have been trying to get their hands on it too.”
“I'm glad you got it before they did.”
“No kidding.” She jumped up, leaned over to kiss him and darted to her room. She came back with the book flipping through the pages.
“Wow, it looks like she's kept this journal for over twenty years, only writing in it like once every couple years. Where should I start?”
“Start at the beginning, Onyx, you should know the whole story.”
9
Cole braced himself for what he was about to hear. Over twenty years of Jade's life were in that book. What would she have written about back when she wasn't much older than Onyx was now?
He came into the coffee shop again this afternoon after class. We were busy, so I couldn't talk to him until my break. I hated bugging him, because he probably thinks I'm just a dumb kid. But, for some reason I'm drawn to him. I brought him a fresh cup of coffee and he asked me to sit down and join him. We talked for so long, he told me all about today's lecture. He's so interesting! And smart! I could never be with someone so far superior to me in intellect; it would probably drive him nuts. But, he's so nice.
Halloween is next week. I know I need to take the time off, because my heat will be unpredictable. My mother says it's normal and some of the werescientists are working on a pill that will help repress it. Wouldn't that be amazing! Not to be ruled by our hormones? Maybe werewomen would be able to take up leadership positions then? I tried talking to Mom about starting classes at the community college, but I know I'm lucky I'm even allowed to work outside of Willow Hills. None of the shifters my age do. It's not far enough though. I want to see Italy and France, England and Ireland. I want to travel everywhere, spend my time with someone I truly love. Like him. He’s traveled all over. I read once there are over 300,000 feral cats living in Rome. Wouldn't it be amazing to run the streets of Rome as a cat? I wonder what he would think of me if he knew what I really was?
“Did your mother ever go to Rome?”
“Not that I know of, no. I wonder who the mystery man was?”
Cole shifted in his chair and didn't answer her question. “I wonder about the pill she was talking about, was it ever produced? I find it hard to believe shifters get anything done when they have to spend one week a month rutting like animals.”
She blushed and looked down.
“I'm sorry. Shit, that was insensitive. I didn't mean it like that.”
She seemed to let the moment go and went back to the main issue. “I overheard Marie and Wilson talking about it. They didn't want me to get my hands on any before Halloween. Apparently they took whatever she had out of the house. I didn't know if it was a pill or something else.”
“Most likely it's similar to human birth control pills. Although those had been around already for quite awhile before she wrote that. So maybe it's a specific variation.”
“They called it CR-1.”
He shook his head. “No idea. I spelled you last night, but—” He stopped and smiled at her “—it didn't seem to take.”
“Spelled me?”
“A protection/binding type of spell. That's why I left the candles burning in your room. It seemed to ease your suffering for awhile and you were able to rest,” Cole explained.
She looked up at him sheepishly. “I blew the candles out when I woke up.”
“Well, that explains it. Here I thought I was losing my edge.”
She narrowed her eyes at him, but laughter escaped her lips. “Something else you did worked much better.”
He loved that she wasn’t a sensitive little flower. She had a sense of humor. But she was still so sweet.
Before managed another word, she set the book down, and leaned over to kiss him. He couldn’t help kissing her back. He brought his hand to the back of her neck and gently pulled her loser.
Before he knew what he was doing, he pushed his chair out and stood, yanking her against him.
She let out a soft moan. Not the intense, almost painful noises she’d made earlier when stressed from her heat. He slipped his arms around her and held her tight slowly moving his hands down to cup her ass. There wasn’t a part of her body that didn’t fit him perfectly.
He lifted her in his arms. She wrapped her legs around him and he carried her to his bedroom. He kicked the door open and crossed the room to drop her on the bed.
He climbed over her, settling on the other side of the bed. “Tell me you want this.”
“I want you.”
He nodded and undid the sash of her robe, pulling it apart to look down at her body. With a soft smile, he placed a hand over her belly button and stroked her satin skin.
“That tickles.”
He propped his head up in his hand and stared down at her for a moment, taking in all her perfect features. “You're so pretty.”
She opened her mouth to respond, but he needed to taste her mouth. Before any words came out, he leaned down and pressed his lips over hers. His hand traveled up, tickled her ribs and he used one finger to tease the underside of her breasts. She moaned and thrust her breasts up, begging for him to do more than just tantalize them. He grabbed one in his hand, rubbing her nipple with his thumb until it was rock hard. Then he did the same with the other one. He broke their kiss and slid down
to take one nipple into his mouth and suck. She arched her back, giving him better access. He let go and flicked her nipple with just the tip of his tongue, grinning when she jerked in response.
He lifted his head to watch her face. “You're so sweet.”
“Don't stop now!”
“Never.” And he bent down to take the other nipple in his mouth, teasing it with his tongue until she wriggled under him.
Slowly, he slid his hand down, stoking her softly. His fingers tickled her hips, skimmed over her legs. He nudged her legs apart and slipped his hand between her thighs
“Scoot back up on the bed,” he coached, positioning her so she was more comfortable and slipping a pillow under her hips. She watched him with wide eyes. He kissed his way down her body, and she squirmed to get away.
“Stay still,” he ordered. To his surprise, every time she tried to wriggle away, it only made him want to hold her down harder. Pleasure her even more. She pushed him in all the best ways.
He gripped her hips with his hands and kissed her stomach, trailing his way to her mound. She fought to close her legs and nudge his head away. “No.”
He popped his head up and studied her nervous expression. “Why not?”
“It's—” She blushed and couldn't continue.
“It's what, sweetheart?” God help him, because the way she turned red excited him even more.
“I don't...please.”
“Has anyone ever kissed you here?” He pressed a kiss to her inner thigh and watched her pretty cheeks flush even pinker.
“No.” She shook her head and closed her eyes.
“I want to taste you.”
She blushed red from head to toe now. “I don't want to taste funny.”
She’s too innocent for me.
He chuckled softly against her skin. “You smell sweet and I think you will taste especially wonderful. No more talking, Onyx. Just moaning. Maybe some purring.”
She nodded and put her hands over her eyes. He had the urge to restrain her. Tie her hands down and force her to watch as he used his mouth to bring her to orgasm.
Next time.
“Next time I want your eyes on me.”
She shook her head and suppressed a giggle.
All laughter died on her lips once he slid his hands down from her hips to grasp her thighs and push them apart. She brought her knees up, giving him an amazing view.
“Good girl,” he praised. His fingers teased the insides of her thighs “Wider, kitten. I want to see all of you.”
She hesitated, then opened a little more. Cole brought his lips to her and kissed down her seam. On his way back up he used his fingers to spread her open, kissing the wet, sensitive flesh, tasting the sweetness of her parted lips.
She gasped, her legs falling open. Her hips jerked against him Now that she was open to him, he used his tongue and placed long broad strokes up and down. When her legs shook, he used his tongue to gently lick around her clit.
The harder he licked, the loader she moaned until she was thrashing on the bed. He used his hands to hold her down, lapping at her harder and more insistent. Determined to make her come hard on his tongue. Her hands grabbed his hair and she tried to squeeze her legs shut. The burning tingle over his scalp as she held on to his hair fired him up even more. He gripped her thighs rougher this time, pushing them apart. He kept licking at her with precise, constant movements, then slid two fingers in her and lightly pumped in and out until her hips bucked off the bed and she let out a shriek. He sucked at her clit one last time and she let out a long shrill scream of pleasure.
“Good little pussy...cat,” he said with a smirk.
Panting so hard her breasts jiggled and covered in a fine sheen of sweat, she’d never looked more beautiful. “What...what was that?”
He kissed his way up her body, stopping to dip his tongue in her navel and moving farther up to kiss her nipples. When he finished, he stretched out beside her. “How do you feel?” he asked gently.
She turned to face him. “I had no idea that would be so incredible.” He fingers trailed over his stomach, then lower. “What about you?”
“Later,” he answered with a grin.
“I want to...do that...to you...but you'll have to teach me, Professor.” She gave him a wicked grin and winked.
He groaned. “Naughty little kitten, aren't you?”
She snuggled into his arm and nodded. “If only my clowder knew, they wouldn't want me for Denny's mate now,” she said. Her soft voice told him she was close to falling asleep in his arms.
Cole stiffened, at her words but didn't respond. Why was he surprised? There was no way she wanted to settle down with her first lover, but he couldn't deny part of him wanted her to. Needed her to. This wasn’t just protective instinct. This was an all-consuming need to have her forever fire inside him. The thought of her going back to her clan, or joining a new one and finding another mate made him insane with jealousy. She was his.
From experience, he knew wereamimals mated outside their kind sometimes. There were lots of success stories in the magical community. Usually they mated with other magical creatures of some sort. Mating with humans rarely worked out well for them, although sometimes he supposed it was possible.
Imagine the magical child they would produce...
As soon as he had the thought, he shut those feelings down. She wasn't going to stay. He better prepare himself for that right now. Children? For god's sake, what the hell was wrong with him? It would be wrong to try to convince her to stay.
He looked down at her sleeping in his arms, so beautiful and sensual. Holding her close to his chest, he realized he had never felt more peaceful.
Too bad it couldn’t last.
10
Onyx woke draped diagonally across Cole’s bed. She was alone but someone had tucked the covers around her. She sat up and looked for Cole. Alarmed that she couldn't find him, she got up, slipped into her robe, and went searching.
She found him quietly coming in the back door.
He turned and smiled when he found her. “I thought you were still sleeping.”
“I just got up. Where were you?” She hated that her voice sounded somehow accusatory. Needy. That was the last thing she wanted him to think.
“I went out to look for something.” He gestured to the kitchen table, indicating she should sit down.
She crossed her arms over her chest instead. “What?”
“CR-1.”
“Really? Were you able to find it?” She couldn't hide the excitement in her voice.
“No. It must go under some other name or it's something only made in the shifter community, although I find that unlikely because it would be very inconvenient. However, I did snag regular birth control for you and we'll see if that helps.” He tossed a bag on the table. She stared at it for a while.
“I haven't had any more flashes since last night.”
“I know.” He eyed her carefully.
He was going to make her say every word, wasn't he? “As long as you're here to help me, I don't really need them.”
“Onyx, I loved making love to you, but I don't want to take advantage of your...condition.”
“Condition?”
“I don't mean it in a bad way. I'm trying to do the right thing.” He ran his hands through his hair, which she realized he did whenever he was frustrated.
She pushed the bag away. “We'll see what happens. I feel fine right now. Maybe it's over.”
“Okay.” He took the bag off the table and set it on the counter. “Have you looked at your mother's journal again?”
“No, I was waiting for you.”
He sat down and gestured for her to open the book.
The next entry was made the following year.
The Clowder leaders from a place called Catcall Falls have been in touch with my parents. They must have told them about my interest in travel and have invited me to come stay. When I said I wanted to travel I meant somewhere exciting, not
some other Podunk werecat community. But I am profoundly grateful for the change of scenery. It's only two weeks. They gave me unpaid vacation time from the coffee shop. Gino said he can't run the place for longer than that, so I need to hurry back. I'll miss him, I didn't get a chance to tell him where I'm going or when I'll be back. At least I'll have something interesting to contribute to our conversations when I return.
A few months later
They're gone. Mom and Dad are gone. They died together in some sort of freak accident. No one knows what happened. Everyone was so sweet to me in Catcall Falls, and I can't stand the memories at home. I haven't seen him in months now, so he's probably found someone else. It's better that way. I belong with my own kind.
Onyx stopped reading and looked up at Cole. “My grandparents also died together in an accident?”
He quirked his eyebrows at her.
“I never realized my mother didn't grow up in Catcall. I thought...I thought she and Marie had grown up here together.”
“Didn't she tell you any childhood stories?” Cole asked.
“No. I mean, just vague things I guess now that I think about it. I knew both my sets of grandparents had died before I was born, but I didn't know much more than that.”
Another entry was made a year later.
I'm married! Can you believe that? I guess I'm older than the average Catcall bride, but I still feel too young to be a “wife” isn't that crazy! God, I love Max. He's the most handsome, sweetest man I've ever known besides Daddy. He works hard and treats me very, very well. I know he's in line to become the next Beta of the clowder, but I don't even care about that. I just love him so much. This is real, true love. Not crush-love like I've felt...before. I've made best friends with a girl my age here, Marie. Her husband, Wilson, will probably be the next Alpha. The four of us do everything together. I know Catcall isn't Rome, but I do love it. Max has promised to take me to Rome one day so we can run with the feral cats.