“I’m Luis. Something from the bar?" the waiter asked us. He was an older gentleman, outfitted in a very formal, black tuxedo. A starched white towel folded over his arm completed his ensemble.
Luis took our orders and left us. I looked around and took in the scenery. Bigliardi’s was small and dark, with cozy tables set randomly around the restaurant. The restaurant was renowned for their steak and my stomach grumbled.
We were seated at a small table for four against the wall. Jay was beside me.
"Just for the record Harmon, tonight is my treat. Vee and I are having a farewell dinner to Evelyn and you’re my guest. All right by you?"
"All right by me," he agreed.
I smoked a cigarette and we sat quietly for several minutes until Luis returned with our drinks. I held my soda water and said, "To Ev." I took a sip.
"To Ev," Jay repeated. "How was the rest of your day?"
"Shitty and I don’t think I want to talk about it," I told him. I was embarrassed and feeling guilty about my talk with Harold. Embarrassed because he felt he needed to raise the subject and guilty because I knew I was in the wrong. If I refused to talk about my day with Jay, I wouldn’t let anything slip.
Jay didn’t respond, he just sipped his beer. The silence was awkward and I let my eyes wander the room deliberately avoiding looking at Jay who was handsome in a solid navy blue suit. I wanted to curl up on his lap and go to sleep. Into oblivion.
I looked at my watch and prayed that Vee would arrive soon.
"So," Jay said. "Too bad about the Leafs. We’re almost through another season and it’s not looking good. I doubt they’ll get a playoff spot."
"Yeah. Too bad." Small talk. I hated it. My right ear started to burn.
"Where the fuck is Vee? It’s six-twenty. That asshole Oakes has probably got her working." I mashed my cigarette out in the ashtray. A younger version of Luis appeared and replaced it with a clean one.
"Another beer," Jay ordered tersely. He scurried away and I looked at my watch again.
"Jesus, Kate. Wind down. Take it easy." Jay put his hand over mine. My hand was balled into a fist and Jay worked at prying my fingers out of the fist. Very gently.
I could feel the heat from his body, he was sitting so close to me.
He leaned over and whispered in my ear, "What’s the matter, Kate?" And then I burst into quiet tears. Jay’s hand tightened on mine. I hated myself. Crying in a public place. I kept my head down and I tasted the tears that ran down into my mouth. I grabbed the napkin that Luis had placed on my lap when we sat down and tried to wipe my eyes with it but it was so stiff from starch I felt like I was wiping my face with a piece of cardboard.
I didn’t see Vanessa arrive at that moment but I knew she was sitting beside me when I caught a pleasant draft of her perfume. Now I was really embarrassed. I heard her order a vodka tonic. Jay passed me a clean tissue and I cleaned myself up.
I smiled weakly at Vanessa beside me.
"Hi."
"Hi yourself," she said back. More small talk. "You okay?"
I nodded. "Fine. Just fine."
Luis returned with Vee’s vodka tonic and I surprised everyone at the table.
"I’ll have a Canadian Club with gingerale on the side." I couldn’t remember the last time I’d had a real drink. Maybe seven or eight years ago. I looked forward to it. I felt I deserved it.
The drink relaxed me and we ended up enjoying the rest of the evening. We made a pact among the three of us that we wouldn’t talk about what was going on at the office. We were here to honour Ev so we told Evelyn stories. At one point Vee and I were laughing so hard Jay had to shush us.
"Everyone in the restaurant’s staring at us," he laughed.
"Fuck ‘em," I slurred, pretending to be drunk.
Vee agreed. "Yeah, fuck ‘em." Her slur wasn’t faked. She’d had some wine with dinner and she was now into the liqueurs. Something brown and thick served over ice. The thought of it made me shiver.
I waved at Luis and asked for the bill. Time to get out of here. Hit the dusty trail. Tomorrow wasn’t going to be a picnic. We’d be on call all day for the directors’ meeting. I had no idea if I was going to be expected to run back and forth between the office and the Four Seasons. I remembered that I hadn’t cleared that point with Harold. Normally he’d want me on the premises, wherever they were holding the meeting but I’d received no instructions.
Jay and I put Vee into a cab and waited for the valet to bring his car around. A taxi pulled up in front of Bigliardi’s and five or six Japanese gentlemen poured out. Jay and I backed up against the wall beside the entrance to avoid getting trampled.
Jay put his arm around me and I huddled close to him. I was feeling very sleepy and I was watching the Japanese. They were trying to convince their cab driver to get out of the car and take their picture in front of the restaurant. As I watched the Japanese another taxi arrived.
I just about missed them in the crowd of people in front of the restaurant. When I realized who was passing right beside us I just about fell over.
I elbowed Jay in his side and whispered loudly up at him, "There." I pointed. "Can you believe that?" I was amazed. Jay looked around and then down at me.
"What?" The valet arrived with Jay’s car and suddenly the sidewalk in front of the restaurant was empty. Jay started towards the valet and was holding out his hand to pass him a tip. The valet opened my door and I slid in. Jay got in and fastened his seatbelt.
"Did you see that?" I demanded.
He looked in the side mirror for traffic coming up behind us and eased the car into the street.
"What?"
"Not what. Who. Didn’t you see who got out of that second cab?"
"No. I was thinking about how tall I was compared to those Japanese guys."
Jesus.
"Tell me pretty Kathleen. Who got out of the second cab?" He looked over at me and smiled. "Dini Petty?"
"No. I don’t think Dini travels around the city in a cab. You’ll never guess."