Nathan with other women. Ugh. It hurts more than distracts. Try again. Nathan mucking out the stables. Okay, here we go, I’m getting there.
His mouth fixed on mine, kissing me, his hands wandering everywhere. We’re going to end up having sex here if he gets his way. What was that all about earlier, stopping us having sex so I could feed? It’s like he’s forgotten all about that.
But he was right. I do need to feed. And I need to stop this, but my mind isn’t responding, it’s just going along with the amazing feelings I’m having. But I could lose control and hurt him. Keep thinking yucky things, Alex.
Nathan milking a cow. Yep, that’ll do it. Nathan milking, milk from a cow’s udder. Oh God, gross.
There we go.
And somehow I manage to extract myself from him, using a great deal of self-restraint, and say, “Well, horny boy. You’re just going to have to wait a while longer, because I'm not risking it. I’m not risking you.”
Pushing him back gently, I give him a soft smile.
“Killjoy.” He pouts, which only makes me want to kiss him.
Manure. Think manure, Alex, and cow udders.
“What happened to practical Nathan, you know the one from earlier? Who are you and what have you done with him?”
He lets out a low chuckle.
It does all kinds of evil things to me.
“Seriously, since when did I turn into the sensible one of the two of us?” I ask, bemused.
“Since you came back on fire.”
I raise an eyebrow at him. “What do you mean?”
He cups my face with his hand. The contact drives me crazy.
“You’re different Alex, but still the same, if that makes sense. You’re just so independent and strong. You’re full of determination and it’s as hot as fucking hell.”
He lets out a small laugh. “You used to need me, before … now, not so much – and it’s okay.” He says at my expression. “I like it.”
“I need you,” I say fervently, meeting my blue eyes to his green ones, ignoring the little voice in my head, saying I’m like this because of Zeff.
I’m stronger and more independent because he helped me to become a better version of myself. Better than the one that left Nathan sleeping in that hotel room that night.
I sweep my Jiminy Cricket to the back of my mind and watch as Nathan’s smile turns into a slippery grin.
“You turned me on before, no doubt about that, but now, well you can see for yourself.” He looks down and I follow his gaze.
We both look back up at the same time. I feel a strong frisson of energy; electricity and arousal flow between us.
Will it always be like this with him?
God, I hope so.
I bite down on a smile, which I think would have become a lusty smile had I not stopped it, and move away from him before he can try and get his way with me, again.
Then without looking at him, I shift into my other self.
I look up at him. He’s smiling down at me. He looks impressed. He pulls his dog tags off over his head, dropping then on our pile of clothes, and then he shifts too. I’ve never seen him turn before. His fur is dark brown. He nuzzles into my own fur with his nose, sniffing me. Looks at me for a long moment and I see an almost smile in his eyes, then he takes off running.
I dart off after him, very quickly catching up.
We hunt together, and it’s the most exciting and exhilarating feeling ever. After we’ve finished we lay together in the woods, sated.
I watch with my wolf eyes Nathan changing back to his human form. Then I let my body shift back too.
I lay on my front, propped up on my elbows, looking at him laid there on his back, staring over at me.
“You’re amazing, you know that?” he says in a low voice.
“That a compliment, Hargreaves?” I tease. Nathan doesn’t issue compliments often or freely. But he sure is throwing quite a few around today. “Because I could seriously get used to them.”
“Maybe … Jones.” He turns onto his side, facing me, and runs his fingertip lightly down my back. It sends a shiver rushing down my spine.
I can’t believe I’m laid here in the woods, naked, and I actually feel comfortable.
And it’s because I’m with him. He makes me feel so utterly safe and comfortable.
I rest my chin on my shoulder and stare at him.
He stares back.
“What are you thinking?” he asks, his voice warm.
“Nothing.” I smile. “I’m just happy.”
“And fed.”
“Well, yeah, that too.”
He leans closer and gives me a delicious kiss. Moving a breath away from my lips, he says, “Are you happy, here with me?”
I feel a sudden ache deep within my chest that he even has to ask. It knocks the wind out of me.
“Of course I am,” I say emphatically.
He says nothing more, just stares into my eyes, piercing straight into my soul. But something tells me there’s more to come. That there’s more he wants to say … ask.
But he doesn’t.
Do I think this because I keep expecting him to ask me about Zeff, and he doesn’t? Not once has he mentioned his name, or anything Original wise, since I told him about Zeff yesterday at the stables.
I guess I just thought he’d be curious. I know I would be. He knows I spent a week with Zeff in Italy, I thought he would question the contents of that week. Have questions about Zeff, knowing exactly who and what he is. But so far, nothing.
Not a nada.
If it were me, I’d be more jealous of the thought of Nathan spending a serious amount of time with another woman, irrespective of who they were.
And part of me is glad he doesn’t ask, don’t get me wrong. But another part of me is bothered as to why he doesn’t.
The rational side of me is saying, maybe he just doesn’t want to know, that’s simply it. The irrational side is saying … well you can probably guess what my irrational side is conjuring up.
But then ultimately there is nothing to know. Not really. A fleeting almost moment, that he doesn’t need to know about, because it was nothing.
So it’s a moot point.
I know that whatever I thought I might have been feeling for Zeff at that time was just me projecting my feelings for Nathan onto him.
My loneliness was looking for a substitute, and Zeff fit the bill.
Nathan starts to stroke the skin on my shoulder with his rough finger, removing all traces of thoughts over Zeff from my mind with it, trailing it down my arm, his eyes following. I watch him, watching me. He moves his attention back to my face, my mouth. I wet my dry lips. His gaze softens, and the way he’s touching me and looking at me has my skin fizzing, tingling. The feeling rushing over me, taking complete hold.
You know that feeling, the one when you know you’ve finally got it. Got the one person you’re meant to spend your whole life with, right here in front of you. Someone so truly amazing they beggar belief. And he wants you right back, as you are, asking for nothing in return.
Nathan is mine. My one.
The sensation makes me dizzy, heady.
“I want you in the worst kind of way,” he murmurs.
And with his words, all my thoughts slide south of dirty.
Wearing nothing but a smile, he leans closer, his hard body pressed up against my side, he kisses me gently, lips barely touching. A little moan of pleasure escapes me.
That’s all it takes for him.
I feel him harden against my leg, then shifting me up and onto my side, he rolls onto his back, pulling me on top of him in one fluid movement. He kisses me deeply, intensely, in only the way he can, making me feel like only he can. Unknowingly lifting me out of my jaded past, taking me far far away from all the pain and hurt I’ve carried around for so long, and he lands me into paradise.
Our paradise.
And I swear to all the gods, I’m never coming up for air again. I am never losing
this feeling that I have right now, here, with him.
Chapter 28: Birthday Boy
“Careful, watch the door,” I say, as I manoeuvre Nathan through into the dining room, my hands covering his eyes.
Jack, Craig, and Scarlett, are standing around the table in silent anticipation.
Today is the 5th of March. The day Nathan turns thirty.
I couldn’t believe it when he told me that it was going to be his birthday today – such a coincidence. I only realised it was March when he told me.
My birthday is March 6th. I didn’t tell him though. It’s not important and I don’t really feel like celebrating it.
I shopped online for Nathan’s present, he hadn’t exactly left me with much time. He was insistent he didn’t want a present or to celebrate, but I told him to put a sock in it.
He’s turning thirty, it’s a big deal.
Borrowing Craig’s laptop I searched online for ages, finally stumbling across something … well the only think I could think of to buy him really.
He’s not so easy to buy for, I’ve discovered.
Well I ordered the gift, and Craig collected it first thing this morning for me, as I still can’t go out in public around here. I’m just praying Nathan will like it.
I also ordered clothes, shoes, and underwear too, and had them delivered on express delivery. I’m wearing dark blue skinny jeans and a black strappy top. Simple yet, sexy. Oh and my new underwear of course. No more basic white bras and undies for me. Sexy, all the way from now on.
God bless the internet is all I can say.
I did have to borrow Craig’s credit card though to pay online, but I gave him the cash straight away. His credit card bill will look interesting that’s for sure … La Perla, Victoria’s Secret, Topshop, H&M. I hate been trapped on the farm like this, having to rely on delivery and them to get things I need. Hopefully it won’t be for too long.
I used the money that I should have given Zeff to pay for my passport to pay for Nathan’s birthday present and my new stuff. I should feel guilty, I know I should, but right now I’m too mad with him to care. I’ve still got plenty of money left over, but I’m going to work here on the farm in exchange for my room and board. Jack didn’t want me to pay him rent, but I was insistent.
I pay my own way from now on. No relying on anyone else.
Jack has cooked an amazing lobster dinner. He even let me and Scarlett help him cook, which is a first for Jack. It was awesome. I had a real blast in the kitchen with them both. It was really good to spend time with Scarlett, getting to know her better.
The table is all set up for dinner, candles lining the centre, and a pile of presents and cards at the end from us all.
Champagne is chilling in the cooler. Birthday cake at the ready. I really hope he likes it.
I'm so nervous I’ve got butterflies swooping circles in my stomach. We spent the morning together, but he went out this afternoon Carting with Craig, giving us time to surprise him with this meal tonight.
I position him in front of the table.
Sliding my hands away from his eyes, I say, “Happy birthday!”
Jack, Craig, and Scarlett, all chorus in too.
Moving around, I see the smile on his face. But I also know he’s so uncomfortable right now. He really doesn’t do the centre of attention thing. But I don’t care. It’s his birthday. And he’s turned thirty. It’s an important day, even if he says it isn’t.
“Thank you,” he murmurs, leaning down to kiss me on the cheek, just skimming shy of my lips. I still get spine tingles every single time he kisses me.
“It wasn’t just me, it was a team effort.” I smile around at everyone.
“Cheers guys,” says Nathan.
“You’re welcome, son,” Jack pats him on the back. “And happy birthday.”
I can see how happy Jack is that Nathan’s happy.
And it makes me happy. That’s a lot of happy’s but rather that than going back to where we all were before.
“Happy birthday,” chirps Scarlett.
“Yeah, happy birthday mate,” Craig chips in.
“Food smells great, what're we having?” Nathan asks me.
“Lobster with garlic sauce.”
His face lights up.
“It’s all on Jack. He said lobster is your favourite.” There’s so much I still don’t know about him. But I’m loving learning.
“It’s ready to dish up now,” says Jack, heading for the kitchen.
“You need a hand?” I ask, turning to him.
He shakes his head, “No. You all just sit yourselves down.”
Jack loves having people to cook for and take care of. It’s his thing for sure. I pull my chair out and sit down, Nathan sits beside me. Craig is opposite Nathan, Scarlett across from me.
“So I get presents too?” says Nathan, eyeing the little pile of gifts.
“Of course you do, silly,” I nudge him with my elbow.
“Yours in there?” he nudges me back.
I shake my head. Mine is in my pocket, hidden from view.
Craig smiles at me over the table. A little conspiratorial smile.
Jeez, you’d think it was something big I’ve got him. Because it’s not. Not really. Or maybe it is. I don’t know.
I start to feel nervous and a little nauseous. My hand is resting on the table. I drum my fingers on it. I think Nathan senses my nerves because he reaches over and takes my hand in his, entwining our fingers. That one simple act from him calms me and sends shivers running all over my skin.
No one has ever been able to make me feel like he does. Or ever will again.
Jack starts to bring the food over, laying the platters in the centre of the table, and everyone quickly tucks in, presents momentarily forgotten.
There is no clean way to eat lobster, it’s ridiculous. I’m making a real mess. But it’s also delicious which makes it hard to care.
Nathan looks at me, a smile forming on his lips. He reaches over and wipes a dribble of garlic sauce from my chin, then licks it off his thumb. Heat flushes through me, intimately.
He leans over and gives me a soft kiss on the lips. I’m left feeling disappointed when he moves away and continues on eating.
Coming to, I glance around the table, wondering if anyone just saw our exchange. They are all too busy tearing into their lobster to have noticed. Then I just sit for a moment watching them all, eating, drinking, the odd exchange of idle chatter.
And it feels just like old times.
Except there’s a few faces missing from around the table. A feel a pang for Sol and Erin. Carrie too, even though she was never here, I always wished she was.
But no, tonight is not about sadness of any kind, or discussing the Original’s or vampires or anything. It’s just about Nathan.
I filled Craig in, yesterday, about Zeff, and learnt a few things myself …
“So let me get this straight. You’ve met Matthias,” Craig said, a puzzled expression on his face.
“Yes.”
“And you thought he was someone else, because that’s what he told wanted you to believe?”
“Yes.”
“And he helped you? Wants to protect you from Isaiah?”
“Yep.”
“And they haven’t seen each other for eighteen years?”
“Nope.”
“Wow. Shit. I know they cast me out, but hell, I thought I was still in the loop to a certain extent. But fuck, there’s been a lot going on I didn’t know about.”
“Cast you out?”
Pause. “I’m kind of related to the Originals.”
“What?!”
“It’s not common knowledge, we have to keep it secret, obviously, but as you – know him, well then, I guess it’s not such a big deal now.”
My mouth opened forming an ‘O’.
“Their aunt, Genevieve, she was my paternal, great great and beyond grandmother.”
“Oh.” I wondered if Craig has the magic gene
at all. I didn’t ask though.
“And my family. We the ones who are charged with protecting and keeping them both safe. Have done for generations. I didn’t want in. I wanted a semblance of a normal life. Hence the cast out.”
Apparently, that’s why I felt that weird pull to Craig when I first met him. The bloodline. His bloodline is what in effect swims through my veins.
So I’m guessing that was part of the allure with Zeff too.
Anyway, enough Original talk. I don’t want to think about Zeff. It’s coming close to a week since I watched him drive away from me in Italy. And not a murmur.
I hope for it to stay that way. With all of them. No one knows I’m here. Still, I know I can’t stay here permanently. But I’m in a bubble at the moment with Nathan and I don’t want to burst it.
The real world is out there waiting to destroy me. So for now, I’m hiding in here with him.
I’ve noticed Nathan isn’t really drinking much tonight, he’s still on his first glass of champagne. I want him to have fun on his birthday, but still, I’m glad he’s eased back on the drinking.
We get to the presents and cards before having the birthday cake. Jack didn’t make it, he didn’t have the time, so he bought one and it looks delicious.