One other girl had had a father as paranoid as mine: Sophie Caruletta, whose father was supposedly linked to organized crime.
In seventh grade, our bodyguards had stood like sentinels outside the gray-stone exterior of Our Mother of Holies School for Girls until the two of us emerged at the end of each day, both of us whisked away in our black town cars.
Like me, Sophie was tagged as odd. Though everyone quietly respected or feared her father, no one dared tease or mock Sophie for his extraneous efforts at protecting her.
However, my father was simply a lawyer—albeit a successful one.
Lots of my classmates’ fathers were lawyers and none of them had bodyguards following their children’s every move like me, which left me in the center of the ‘bizarre’ target.
Stuart, being younger than previous ‘fatherly-aged’ bodyguards, had taken me from being odd to interesting because lots of the girls at Chatham thought he was hot. A few of the more aggressive girls had baited him on a daily basis, coming out of the building ripping off their coats, tucking their blouses in a tie at their midriff and unbuttoning until their colorful bras peeked out.
Would they be as brazen with Colin?
He’d settled on a box of Shredded Wheat—Daddy’s morning ritual food—and then he pointed to various cabinets, watching me for confirmation of which one held the bowls.
When he finally pointed to the right one, I hid a grin behind a mouthful of cereal. He pulled out a bowl, eyeing it. He whistled.
“Nice.”
Joining me at the island counter, he gingerly placed the bowl down. “You sure we can eat off this stuff?”
I nodded. “It’s our everyday china.”
“That’s right.” He shook Shredded Wheat squares into the bowl.
“I seem to remember gold plates in the dining room.” He grinned, poured milk.
“Mother likes everything just so.”
He spooned a bite of cereal into his mouth, nodded. “I can see that.”
The sound of rustling drew my attention to the door. Mother, fully made up and dressed in a lush, apricot velveteen workout suit fluttered in. Her emerald eyes latched on Colin. “Good morning.”
Mother never got up before eleven. Gavin didn’t come into the townhouse until nine, and the cleaning service didn’t come until after noon so as to allow Mother the time she needed to prepare privately.
Colin swallowed. “Morning.”
“You look marvelous.” Mother circled Colin. I couldn’t believe she was looking at him so critically, so unabashedly. She flicked at his shoulders, smoothed his sweater down his arms and back.
Colin’s eyes widened, but she didn’t see them. He looked like he was going to choke on the cereal in his mouth but he swallowed it down.
“Very nice.” Mother stood back, appraising him. “How did you sleep?”
“I slept fine, thank you.”
“Good.” Her gaze slid to me. “Darling, you have circles under your eyes.” She came to me and reached out to press her hands to my cheeks but I stood, grabbed my bowl and headed for the kitchen sink.
“Are you feeling all right?” Mother asked. “I don’t want you going to school if you’re at all under the weather, not with the flu going around. I’m sure they don’t sanitize the knobs and surfaces like they should at that place.” Mother shuddered.
I dumped my remaining cereal down the garbage disposal. “I’m fine.”
“Charles gave you your instructions about Ashlyn and school?”
Mother’s attention shifted back to Colin and a wave of relief coursed through me.
Caught in the middle of chewing, he nodded.
“Mrs. Harrington is the headmistress of Chatham. She’s very good about accommodating our wishes for Ashlyn’s safety.”
I cringed. “Mother.” A low burn of rage started at my feet and raced up my legs and through my body. “It’s ridiculous that you go to these lengths. It’s embarrassing.”
Mother froze, eyeing me through a cold stare. Colin’s chewing stopped. He glanced from Mother to me.
“Your safety is not open for discussion, young lady.”
Young lady? I wanted to scream. My fists opened and closed at my sides. I glared at her. “I’ll be waiting by the front door,” I growled, then stormed from the room.
Humiliation flooded me. I wanted to break through the front door and never come back. I opened the coat closet and retrieved my book bag, yanking it over my head so the strap crossed my chest.
Then I flipped my hair over my shoulders and let out another growl of frustration.
“It’s so embarrassing,” I muttered, adjusting my skirt. I dug for my powder compact, opened it and dabbed my chin and forehead.
“They have no idea.”
“You ready?”
I turned. Colin stood with his hands in his front pockets. Had he heard my grumblings? This couldn’t get worse. “Yes,” I mumbled. “You eat fast.”
“When I need to, yeah,” he said.
“Bye darling.” Mother waltzed into the entry, her smile aimed at Colin. “Have a wonderful day.”
Oh. My. Did she have any idea how ridiculous she looked?
Colin nodded in acknowledgement, his tweaked smile an obvious expression of the awkward moment. He entered the security code into the pad next to the door and a buzzer sounded. He opened the door and held it so I could pass.
“Bye you two!”
The door thudded closed and I took the stoop down to the street where Eddy, Daddy’s driver, waited in our car. Colin opened the door and I slid in. He followed.
“Mornin’, Miss Adair.” Eddy’s thick accent always warmed me inside. He wore the typical navy slacks and matching sweater with shirt and a tie tucked beneath that most drivers wore.
“Morning, Eddy.” I slunk down in the leather seat, unable to shake the utter humiliation I felt.
“Hey.” Colin slid forward, his hand extended over the driver’s seat. “Colin Brennen.”
“Pleasure to meet ya,” Eddy said. He pulled into traffic. “Mr. Adair briefed me about you this morning on his way to work.”
Briefed? Did Daddy ever step out of lawyer mode? Was I simply another case to him? I crossed my arms over my chest, partly to quell the frustration boiling inside of me, partly to show my displeasure. Colin eyed me from across the backseat. I felt childish, acting like a brat. Casually, I sat up and clasped my hands in my lap.
“So you’re an old friend of the family?” Eddy asked.
“Yep, that I am.” Colin’s right leg jittered incessantly. Was he nervous? That would be a first. Soured by Mother’s insensitivity, I whipped out my phone to send her a text, then thought better of it. I wouldn’t put it past her to call me and lecture me on the spot.
For sure she’d call Daddy, and we’d go the ‘your safety is important’
lecture round yet again. She might even call Colin and tell him personal things she didn’t like about me—she’d done that with Stuart, telling him I wasn’t capable of making a simple decision—and he’d used that against me.
“How long have you been here in New York?” Eddy asked.
“About a year now,” Colin said.
“Ya like it?”
Colin’s shoulders lifted. His gaze was out the tinted window.
“Now that I’ve lived here, I see the city differently.”
Eddy chuckled. “Yeah, that’s New York for ya.”
We drove along Park Avenue to Freemont Street in silence. I was tempted to pull my iPod out of my book bag, and would have if Stuart had been with me. That’s how I’d kept him off my back for the drive to school. I watched Colin out the corner of my eye, unable to take my attention from him. His energy was raw, like having a powerful electric cable exposed, ends frayed and yet vulnerable.
His leg continued to jitter. He appeared ready to leap from the car and, what, I wasn’t sure. Did he regret the job already? Had Mother’s attention given him second thoughts?
He caught me watching. He remain
ed silent, but his brown eyes stayed fastened to mine in what? Curiosity?
School was easy for me because, through the years, my narrow life made learning something to look forward to. Outside of music, English and History were my favorite subjects. I loved to dream about life outside my world, and both of those subjects facilitated my fantasies.
Knowing Colin waited for me in the school somewhere caused my mind to wander. The dream of him pressing me against the door, kissing me, streamed through my brain to the soundtrack of his aching tune. Three of my teachers took me aside after class and asked me if I was feeling ok, telling me that I looked distracted.
My cheeks heated even thinking about what my teachers must think of me to notice distraction in their perfect little student.
I couldn’t wait until lunch.
Most of the other senior girls left campus for lunch, choosing to hit Joe’s Deli down the street or Indian Palace on the corner. I wasn’t allowed to leave, and Felicity kindly remained with me.
“It’s so boring we have to stay here and eat,” she mumbled. A twinge of fear trembled inside of me. Was she getting tired of living with my restraints? If she chose to take off without me, I’d be alone.
The thought made my stomach crimp, yet, I could hardly blame her.
“It’s ridiculous,” I said. “What burns me is that everyone thinks I’m this perfect conforming student. ‘She has one day of distraction and—call her parents—sound the alarm.’”
The scent of fried food and Italian seasonings filled the archaic, wood-paneled halls of Chatham as Felicity and I walked to the cafeteria.
A tingle of mischief shot through my blood. “Let’s go.”
Felicity came to a halt beside me. “Your dad will kill you.”
“He’ll fire Colin for not doing his job and I’ll finally be free of all of these bodyguards.” I tugged her sleeve down the hall and turned right, taking an empty corridor which led to the gated exterior of Chatham.
Felicity snorted. “Like that’ll ever happen. I don’t know, Ash, I love you and all, but if your dad finds out I was along for the ride and he’ll probably ban us from seeing each other. Think about it.”
She was right, Daddy would do just that. I stopped at the glass door and gazed out onto the cement courtyard of Chatham where groups of girls stood in clusters eating lunch. Some hung by the chain link fence, taunting the occasional high school boy or two who happened by from the private boy’s school two blocks away. Losing privileges with Felicity would pretty much cut off the minuscule vein I had feeding me anything social. Yet the drive I had to continue reaching for freedom wouldn’t let me stop trying.
Mother, with her weird interest in Colin would probably give me the silent treatment for weeks. Daddy would just find someone else to come work for him. If Colin lost the job because of me—I didn’t like carrying that weight on my shoulders.
I’d thought of running away before, but knew how stupid that irrational choice really was. I had no way of supporting myself. The picture of me coming back because I’d failed was worse than being stuck.
“You’re right,” I sighed. I was surrounded by the fences, doors, and windows I perpetually observed life from.
“But so what,” Felicity taunted.
“We’ll just make sure we don’t get caught.” I flashed a grin at her and tugged her through the door.
We snuck along the exterior brick and stone walls of Chatham, peering around corners, dipping beneath windows like fugitives. The forty-five minute lunch period clicked away, but I didn’t care. Finally, we reached the front of the building.
“You sure you want to do this?” Felicity giggled behind me.
Adrenaline pumped my blood. “Totally.” Frigid winter air bit through my blazer and whirled up my skirt. “Should have brought our coats.” I chattered.
“We’ll freeze before we’re halfway down the block,” Felicity joked. “But at least we’ll be frozen and free, right?”
I didn’t see Colin anywhere, and figured he was inside the building in this cold November air.
We made a beeline for the opening in the chain link fence and started on a jog down the street. I laughed, enjoying the cold air rushing past me, fueling the excitement bursting from the inside out.
At my side, Felicity laughed along with me, the two of us running like kids ditching school. Not that I’d ever ditched before.
We came to a stop at the second corner we passed. Our breath heaved in and out, shooting white smoky plumes into the air. Restaurants were the other direction. In our haste we hadn’t navigated our escape with food in mind, only freedom.
“Here we are,” Felicity blew out with a perfunctory glance around. “All dressed up and nowhere to go.”
“I don’t care if I eat. This is great.”
“Ashlyn.”
The male voice startled me, and Felicity and I whirled around.
Colin stood five feet away, at the corner. He’d followed us? He wasn’t even out of breath.
“How did you find us?” I gasped.
He started toward me, his eyes sharp. “It’s my job to protect you, remember?”
A tingle raced across my skin when he said the words protect you. At the same time, the word babysitter flashed in my head. Colin held my gaze long enough to pin me like a butterfly in a shadow box before he looked at Felicity and nodded. “Colin Brennen.”
“Felicity.” She tilted he head at me. “Ashlyn’s BFF.” They shook hands. Felicity’s cheeks pinked. “Forever, or until her Daddy finds out about this.”
I frowned, whisked past Colin and headed back the direction we’d come. I glanced back. Felicity hung a few feet behind, and Colin was gaining on me. The harsh wind searing the streets and buildings chilled me to the bone and I wrapped my arms around myself.
Seconds later, Colin’s presence pressed against my side. He had the decency not to interrogate me in front of Felicity and that was good, because anger surged through my body. If he had, I would have slugged him in the face, or at least fantasized about slugging him.
When we arrived at Chatham, Colin took hold of my elbow. His grip sent a wave of electricity through me. Felicity paused at my side, looked at Colin’s hand and then at me.
“Felicity, will you give us a minute, please?” he said.
Felicity nodded. Since lunch was wrapping up, crowds of junior and senior girls paraded into the school, coming back from their off-campus lunches. Groups slowed to watch. Whispers floated in the air. A chill teased my spine.
Colin’s piercing gaze remained on me. I was sure he felt the stares, heard the whispers.
He slipped his arm around me so his hand pressed at the small of my back, and he escorted me to a private corner of the Chatham courtyard. There, his right arm shot up to the stone wall, partially caging me in. Out the corner of my eye, girls congregated, curious.
“Want to tell me what that was about?” He kept his voice low, which I appreciated; even if I was humiliated at being caught doing something every other girl had the freedom to do.
“We were trying to go out for lunch. Lots of girls do it. See?”
I swept my hand in the direction of the students behind him. He ignored them.
“You’re not allowed to leave campus.”
I shrugged, and forced indifference on my face. His cologne, faded now, lightly filled my head and caused my stomach to rumble with want. The bell shrilled. He remained anchored to the wall, making me feel frustratingly vulnerable. The dream of him kissing me floated into my brain, leaving my mesmerized by his power to undo me.
“Okay.” I glanced away unable to look him in the eye. “I know.”
“Don’t do it again.” He moved into my line of vision.
“Understood?”
He sounded like Daddy. I worked to control my frustration.
“Yeah, I understand.” My voice tripped. “So, we’re good then?”
He stepped back with a nod. “Yeah.”
I passed him without
looking back, merging into the girls standing and watching us. Catty, curious whispers followed me to class. Stares stole after me, faced me when I went to my locker, visited the bathroom and trailed me when the bell rang signaling that school was over.
Felicity caught up with me at my locker. “Everyone wants to know who the hottie is,” she whispered, her green eyes following the girls walking by staring. “He’s gorgeous, Ash. Daddy done good this time!”