Read Pandemonium (MC Sinners Next Generation #1) Page 19


  “What are you doing?” I whisper.

  “Fuck yourself.”

  I blink. “Pardon?”

  “Fuck yourself, baby. Let me see how you like it.”

  I glance at the mirror to see myself, body dripping wet with bubbles running over my breasts. My legs are spread and I can see the folds of my pussy glistening in the reflection. It’s . . . weirdly sensual.

  Lucas takes hold of my hand and I watch his muscular arm place it between my legs in the mirror. My fingers graze over my flesh, and I gasp. It feels good, more so than any other time I’ve done this.

  “Show me,” he urges, flexing his wrist to make my fingers glide deeper into my flesh.

  I moan and take control, watching in the mirror with fascination as my fingers rub over my slow-growing clit. I run them up and down, parting myself wider, keeping my eyes on my pussy as I slip my fingers inside it. Lucas makes a throaty, groaning sound, and one of his hands disappears into the water. He starts stroking and I shiver, thrusting as deep as I can go, gasping in pleasure as my body comes alive.

  “See how beautiful you look like this?” he murmurs, reaching around with his other hand and cupping my breast, rolling my nipple between his thumb and forefinger.

  “I’m close,” I groan, thrusting my fingers deeper, coating them in my own arousal.

  “Fuck,” he grunts, pushing out of the water. “You’re going to save that for my cock.”

  He pulls my hand back and repositions me so that my hands are touching the tiles on the ground in front of the bath, half of my body propped up by the bath. He’s still in it, holding my ass to him. I can see us both. It’s hot.

  “Brace yourself,” he warns. “Goin’ to fuck you hard.”

  I curl my fingers slightly on the ground, hoping I won’t slip, and my moans fill the air as he slides inside, pushing his cock inch by inch into my depths. I watch him in the mirror, studying his face, loving how intense he looks, how his eyes soften with pleasure. He pulls back, and all the muscles on his body flex as he slams back in.

  “Lucas,” I gasp.

  “Luke,” he murmurs. “Call me Luke. It’s not felt right since...since everything but with you, it feels right again.”

  My heart melts, and I whisper, “Luke.”

  “Yeah,” he growls. “God yeah.”

  His cock slides in and out with ease, and I’m quickly building to a release again. His jaw is tight in the mirror, his eyes deep, full of pleasure. Just the sight of that sends me over the edge and I explode, coming so hard my hands slip forward. Lucas reaches down quickly, catching me around the waist and hauling me up against his wet, hard body as he finds his own release, his mouth near my ear, rumbling grunts echoing through the room.

  “Remind me to do that again,” I murmur lazily when we’ve both come down from that incredible high.

  “I plan on doing it millions of times over.”

  I smile at him in the mirror.

  And he smiles back at me.

  A real, vibrant, beautiful smile.

  CHAPTER 36

  NOW – AVA

  I fidget in my dress, stroking my hands over it. We’re in Lucas’s car on our way to a police charity evening with his team. He asked me to come and of course I agreed, but now I’m nervous. What if they don’t like me? What if I don’t fit in? This world is so different to the one I was raised in; will I feel that?

  Lucas reaches over, taking my hand. He looks stunning in his tux, his hair messy and damp, and his face clean-shaven. Stunning.

  “It’ll be okay. Stop fidgeting.”

  “What if I don’t fit in?”

  “You don’t need to fit into their world; you only need to fit into mine.”

  I look to him. “This is your world.”

  “No, honey,” he says, squeezing my hand. “You are.”

  My smile is huge when I respond with, “Yeah?”

  “Yeah, baby.”

  I look back out at the road, smiling the entire drive to the hall where the event is held. It’s a massive open space with polished wooden floors, a stage, and tables elegantly decorated with white tablecloths and silver finishings. Lucas walks me through, one hand in mine the entire time, keeping me close. He’s proud. My cheeks stay flushed and warm as we move. I’ve never felt so incredible in my life.

  “Lucas.”

  We both turn to see a group of men with women by their sides. Lucas makes a displeased sound, but he walks over anyway, holding my hand tighter.

  “Boys,” he murmurs, then his eyes scan over the women. “Ladies.”

  “It’s good to see you. Heard you’ve been busy on some important cases lately; we haven’t seen you,” one man says, his eyes studying me, even though he’s talking to Lucas.

  “I’m not here to talk about work.”

  “Who’s the pretty girl?” he asks, ignoring Lucas’s remark.

  “My girl, Ava.”

  His girl. My heart flutters.

  “Hi.” I smile.

  “I know that face.” The man grins, his eyes flashing with amusement. “Jackson’s daughter.”

  Great.

  “Don’t matter whose daughter she is,” Lucas mutters, pulling me to his side.

  “Jackson, as in biker Jackson?” a lady says, her eyes flicking to me and taking me in. “Hmm, yes, I can see it now.”

  “It has no point, so why are we talking about it?” Lucas growls.

  “No point?” The man laughs. “You’re fucking a biker’s daughter, and you’re a cop . . . it has a point.”

  “What I do with my personal life is none of your business,” Lucas responds, his voice like ice.

  “I didn’t even know Jackson had kids,” the female muses to herself. “I suppose it’s been over twenty years since I’ve seen him though.”

  “How do you know him?” the man with her snaps.

  “I . . .” Her cheeks flush.

  Gross. She fucked my father once.

  “Can we go?” I ask softly, tugging Lucas’s hand.

  “Yeah,” he says, glaring at them all before pulling me away.

  “Sorry about that, kid,” he murmurs, taking two champagnes from the waiter who comes by. He hands me one. I refuse.

  “Shit,” he mutters. “Sorry, I didn’t think.”

  “It’s okay,” I say.

  “Not okay. I should know better than to offer you alcohol after everything.”

  “Luke,” I say gently, placing a hand on his arm. “It’s okay.”

  He hands the glass off to the next waiter that passes, putting his down too. I don’t argue. He’s wound up and tense.

  “Do you want to dance?” I ask.

  His eyes flash to mine, and he smiles. “Yeah, that’d be good.”

  He takes me out to the dance floor and pulls me into his arms. There are eyes on us from all round, but I ignore them, pressing my cheek to his chest. He moves us softly across the dance floor, holding me as if it’s the last thing he’ll ever do. I never want to let him go; I just want to hold onto him until the world stops spinning, and it’s just us.

  My bladder has other ideas.

  “I have to use the bathroom,” I whisper.

  “Means I have to let you go,” he says, tilting my head up with his finger and kissing my lips.

  “I’ll come back.”

  Yeah, he knows that statement is going to be true for as long as I’m breathing.

  I’ll always come back to him.

  ~*~*~*~

  Tears run down my face as I sit on the toilet lid, clutching my purse to my chest. I’ve been sitting in this toilet cubicle for the last ten minutes, but I can’t get out because there’s a group of women standing at the sinks and they’re talking about me. The words they’re using cut deep, and I’m in here, listening to every, hurtful word.

  “I don’t understand what he’s doing with her. I mean, she’s pretty, but she’s biker trash.”

  “Exactly. Lucas is hot, sophisticated—everything she’s not. God, I fucked hi
m once; the man is out of control. She’s just an easy play-thing. It won’t last.”

  “She’s nothing like Jennifer; that woman had class. This one is young, too. She probably gives it good.”

  “Probably letting him get over his missing wife. Nothing like young, cheap, biker pussy. I’ve been to those clubs; I know how they work. She’s probably been screwing around since she was twelve. Her father was a whore.”

  “I knew Jackson; he was hot in bed. I went through a rebellious stage when I was younger and used to go to his club. The filth I saw there would make anyone’s hair stand on end. Trash. Utter trash.”

  “Such a waste of a good man. He deserves someone better than a biker slut.”

  “Right?” She pauses and I hear some rustling. “Let’s get back out there before we get busted.”

  They all laugh and walk out, and I remain as I am, tears streaming down my face. Are they right? Am I trash? Is that how the world sees me? I think about the club I grew up in. I never felt that with them, not even for a second, but is that how the rest of the world sees us? Just cheap trash?

  My phone buzzes in my purse and I slide it out, glancing at the message from Lucas.

  L – You okay?

  I don’t know how to respond to that. If he sees me, he’ll know the truth and he’ll get angry, but if I leave, he’ll demand answers and he’ll figure it out. I think about the women and their cruel words. I think about the life that I know I live and I know how I should respond to this. It isn’t with pain, but with pride. I know the world I live in. I know their words are wrong. They deserve to know that, too.

  A – No.

  L – Where are you? What’s happened?

  A – I was in the toilet and a group of girls came in talking about me and you.

  L – Where are you?

  A – Still in the toilet.

  I tuck the phone away and only a few minutes later, the door swings open and Lucas barks, “Ava?”

  I push off the toilet and swipe my tears away before stepping out. The second Lucas sees me, his face hardens.

  “What did they say?” he says, his voice as soft as he can manage when he’s clearly angry.

  “They said I’m biker trash, easy pussy, and not classy like your ex-wife,” I say, my voice wobbling.

  His eyes flare and he turns, storming out of the bathroom.

  “Lucas!” I call.

  I rush out after him and when I get back into the ballroom, I find him storming towards the group of women. He stops in front of them, and when he opens his mouth, his words stop the entire room and everyone falls silent, including me. I knew he’d defend me, defend us, but until this second, I never realized just how much I meant to Lucas Black.

  “You’ve had your say,” he says to the women, his voice like a whip. “You stood in the bathroom when my girl was in the toilet and you had your fuckin’ say about what kind of woman she is—about what kind of relationship we have. You put her down, put me down, and thought that wouldn’t come back and bite you in the ass. You’ve had your say.” He leans in close to the bitchiest one from earlier. “Now I’m going to have mine.”

  Their faces fall, and their eyes get wide.

  “You’re unclassy, catty, rotten women with boring pathetic lives and husbands who would rather stick their dicks in the receptionist than go home and fuck your bony, cold asses. Just because you’re wearing nice dresses, expensive jewelry and pretty things doesn’t mean you’re not complete and utter trash—because you are, you know? Women like you that pick on those less fortunate are indeed just that—trash.”

  There is not a cricket to be heard in the crowd, and nobody tries to stop him.

  “That girl”—he points to me, and his eyes grow warm—“has been through more in her short life than any of you combined. So think what you will. In the end, it’s you that goes to bed each night, utterly alone, with not a single person in the world who cares about you. And tonight, you will know that her, the girl you just called worthless, will have me. And to me, she’s the god damned world.”

  With that, he turns and strides towards me.

  The entire room—except the group of women he yelled at—erupts in applause.

  Yes, I love this man indeed.

  CHAPTER 37

  NOW – AVA

  I slide my bottom onto Lucas’s counter and watch him get ready for work. We had a long, blissful night after the police function gone wrong, and I couldn’t have asked for anything better. He made it perfect, as I knew he would. He made up for the pain and the heartache those women caused. He fixed the hole and sealed it up even stronger.

  He’s doing that—making me stronger.

  His doorbell rings, and we both turn to look at each other. It’s pretty early, and by the look on his face, nobody comes around this time of the morning. He puts his coffee cup down and finishes doing his shirt up before walking over and swinging the door open. Then I hear nothing but utter silence. Not a single peep. Curious, I slide off the counter and glance over to see who is there.

  It’s a woman.

  And they’re looking at each other like they just saw a ghost.

  That can’t be good.

  It’s her who speaks first. “Lucas, long time no see.”

  When he speaks, his voices comes out as a garbled “Jennifer?”

  My body goes still. Jennifer? As in, his wife, Jennifer?

  I study the woman who would be utterly stunning if not for the skinny junkie look she’s wearing right now. I don’t know if her hair has always been that shade of blond, or if she was always so skinny and small, but I imagine not. Still, she’s got delicate features and stunning eyes. Without the dark rings under them, she’d be beautiful.

  “It’s me,” she says, but she doesn’t sound happy about it. “I heard you’ve been looking for me? You look good, Luke. Really hot.”

  He flinches.

  I want to go to him.

  “You’ve been missing for over a fuckin’ year, left me after I lost my daughter, and now you’re here telling me I look hot?”

  She waves a hand. “Don’t be so dramatic. I figured you got over me a long time ago. I’m here to talk, so are you going to let me in, or are we going to do this here?”

  She looks past Lucas and sees me, and for a second, her eyes flash with a slight level of pain before she replaces it with anger. “I see it didn’t take you long to move on?”

  “You left,” Lucas says, his voice almost disbelieving. “You fucked another man and left me alone at the hardest moment of my life, and you want to judge me for finding another woman?”

  “She’s pretty,” she says, ignoring him. “Bit young, though, don’t you think?”

  “Tell me what the fuck you’re here for and leave,” Lucas roars, so loudly Jennifer flinches and looks up at him. For a split second, I can see something soft in her eyes.

  “Luke,” she says, her voice less chirpy.

  “Don’t call me that,” he growls. “Tell me what you want and get the fuck out of my life.”

  “Why are you talking to me like this?” she cries, throwing her hands up.

  “If you’re seriously stupid enough to ask that question then you don’t know me at all.”

  “No, you’re right about that. I don’t know you. You pushed me away, you know.”

  His fists clench. He’s on the verge of losing it.

  “I lost my daughter, I lost my life, and my wife decided to make it harder by fucking off and letting me spend over a year looking for her.”

  She frowns. “Which is why I’m here, by the way.”

  “Not lookin’ for you anymore.”

  “But you are.”

  I narrow my eyes. Lucas stiffens.

  “I know you’re looking into Ricky, and I’m here to tell you to stop.”

  Ricky? Who the hell is Ricky?

  “That his name?” Lucas mutters.

  “I’m being serious, Lucas. He’s not happy with you digging into things you shouldn’t be dig
ging into. I’m here, you can see I’m safe—now stop looking or”—her eyes swing to me and then back to him—“you’ll regret it.”

  “Was that a threat?”

  She crosses her arms. “I don’t want anything to happen to you, okay? I loved you once, loved Shylie, but you’re sticking your nose where it doesn’t belong.”

  “Scared I’ll take down all you and that pathetic piece of shit have created?”

  “No. I’m scared for your life.”

  Lucas grunts. “You can assure Ricky I couldn’t give a fuck what he’s doing with you and his shit. I’m a cop, but even I know I’m not big enough to take down something that huge.”

  “I knew you were smart,” she says, studying him.

  “Now are you done?”

  “Really? That’s honestly all you feel towards me after everything?”

  “Got a woman in my house behind me that is ten times the woman you are, so yeah, that’s honestly all I feel.”

  My heart swells.

  “You know he’s been married twice, right?” Jennifer says to me. “You’re not holding hope that you’ll, you know, be the one, are you?”

  I don’t answer her.

  “Well, you know what they say.” Lucas grunts, putting his hand to her chest and pushing her out of the doorway. “Third time is a charm.”

  With that, he slams the door in her face.

  When he looks at me, our eyes hold, unanswered questions flowing between us.

  The first and foremost being . . . are we in danger?

  ~*~*~*~

  “So,” Skye asks, as we enter the compound for the weekly cookout on Saturday night. Lucas is working, so I took the opportunity to come along and catch up with everyone. “His old wife just showed up?”

  I nod. “Yep, just appeared at his front door acting like she never did a thing wrong.”

  “What a bitch,” Skye breathes. “How did Lucas take it?”

  “He was in shock, seriously. He was completely thrown. His voice was almost disbelieving when he was speaking to her, like he was in a dream. But that passed pretty quickly, and he got really upset. It took me hours to calm him down.”