Chapter 10 - A Day of Solitude and Contemplation
The next few days were just as blissful: I worked, I played, I socialized. However, on the sixth day, I had the urge for solitude and reflection, and I therefore spent most of the day on the mysterious Mount Anastasis. This was our own Mount Sinai, a place where God showed his power not by thunder and lightning, but by the greater miracle of bringing the dead back to life again. This mountain, however, was only one of many such mounts scattered throughout Paradise World in which resurrections had already taken place. Thus, these places were viewed as something sacred, and very few went up them except when instructed. Yet, on that sixth day, something deep within me moved me to venture up our sacred mount.
I left early in the morning, and upon reaching the grassy plateau, I stopped and again stared in wonder at the magnificent view that was all around. I thought back to that strange encounter with the angel, the spirit that had materialized in front of me. Would he come again? I wondered. For several minutes, I just stood there, waiting in anticipation. The wind whistled past, birds flew above, but no angel came to greet me. So I ventured onwards and upwards into the forest and on towards the miraculous place we called the 'Resurrection Sanctuary.' With its pools and fountains, trees and flowers, the garden looked just as enchanted as before. However, more importantly than just its beauty was its mystical, otherworldly energy it seemed to exude. For a long moment I soaked it all in, letting my spirits soar to dizzying heights. Then slowly, my senses returned to normal, and I continued my reverential stroll through the garden until....
It was gone! I closed my eyes and slowly reopened them, yet the building I had been resurrected in was no longer there. I do not know why that should have surprised me, but it did. The staircase leading up to the building was still there, but not the house, nor its beautiful veranda. I hesitated, wondering whether I had the right to venture any further. A voice within me told me that I did, and so with slow and deliberate strides I made my way towards and up the steps and onto the large empty slab of marble. Here that eerie sense of latent divine power was even stronger than before, a power that I somehow knew was channeled into this place, a place of miraculous creation, a place were even the dead could rise. I closed my eyes and saw myself once more in that strange yet perfect copy of our New York bedroom. However, upon opening my eyes, I again saw only an empty marble slab. Although not afraid, I felt strangely uncomfortable, as if overwhelmed by things I could not understand. Thus, I retraced my way back down the steps and back to the enchanted garden, then sat on the soft grass under the shade of a mango tree. Now, once more, I felt at perfect peace; my thoughts back to the things of Paradise that I understood. I reflected over these last few days. They had been truly blissful, even without my beloved Jenny.
Then oddly, my thoughts turned to the last few minutes of my former life: the gunshot wound, Jenny's screams, my body getting cold as the life force was draining out of me. I again recalled entering into that dark tunnel, then seeing a great and tremendous light, a light I had come to know here as the Divine Light. For just a fleeting moment, I recalled something else. What? No, I could not recall. I reasoned it might have been a mere dream after I had been resurrected, although still asleep in that mysterious room. It now seemed strange that upon my awakening, my death had then only seemed like a dream, and even stranger when a little later, I could not know whether I was still in a dream or not. Now, here I was, on my sixth day, thinking: Paradise was not a dream.
I reflected on all the brethren I had known in Portland, as well as the ones in Morningside Heights. Apart from Jane Murray and my parents, none were here in Deer Park. So where were they all? I wondered. Many were probably already living somewhere else in this vast new world, and the others, I reasoned, would soon be resurrected.
Suddenly, I felt acutely aware of Jenny's absence. I had largely come up to Mount Anastasis believing that I would be closer to the source which could make all things happen, even bestowing life to the dead. I closed my eyes and began to pray, seemingly feeling God's spirit enveloping all around me, far stronger than I had ever felt in my previous life, and almost as strong as within the Light itself. I prayed for Jenny's resurrection, and was somehow again told that it would be soon. But how soon? I again did not get an answer, only a kind of premonition that there were still some missions for me ahead, missions as yet unrevealed. Then the awesome feeling left me, but the elated feeling remained. I kept my eyes closed, lapping in the comforting warmth of the sun, the cool refreshing breeze, the chirping of nearby birds, and the sudden vivid fantasy of my beloved Jenny lying next to me. I let my imagination run wild and free, and now I could almost feel her lying next to me, feeling the touch of her warm and gentle hands, and her body close to mine. I became intoxicated in my reveries, a vision of pure delight. Then the image faded, and a heavy drowsiness swamped over me as I fell into a deep and soothing sleep.