‘It was your father’s quip and not mine, and I never steal other people’s jokes,’ I explained with a sober expression before I turned back to Rameses. ‘I can see by your expression you agree with me, Rameses.’
So we sharpened our swords and waited impatiently as the days became weeks. Then in the dark of the moon the intrepid Pentu sailed the little sloop Artemis’ Promise back into her hidden mooring on the river below the Garden of Joy. I felt that she had justified the name we had given her by safely completing such a hazardous double voyage in such short order. Her hold was packed with gifts from Queen Tehuti to her daughter Serrena. These included a dozen bottles of her favourite perfume, a plethora of dresses in various magnificent hues sewn and embroidered by her favourite dressmakers, a pair of sandals to match each dress, a large selection of silver and gold jewellery studded with brilliant stones and numerous rolls of papyrus covered with magnificent hieroglyphics.
In one of these weighty epistles Tehuti explained in detail how worried she, Tehuti, had been all this time by one particular aspect of her daughter’s incarceration. ‘There is no suffering, not even childbirth, which a woman is forced to endure that is as agonizing as being deprived of appropriate apparel to wear,’ was how she phrased it.
As a deck-cargo the Artemis’ Promise carried almost fifty cages of pigeons which had been bred in the citadel of Lacedaemon, and therefore were conditioned by their nature to return there at their very first opportunity to take to the skies. Clearly Hurotas and Tehuti were determined to remain in contact with us.
Before the rise of the sun I had written three messages in the Codis Brevus addressed to Hurotas. I sealed them in the silken carrying pouches attached to the breasts of the pigeons. They seemed as eager to return to where they had been hatched as I was to see them on their way. But I kept them waiting a little longer while I wrote a separate note in which I confirmed that Artemis’ Promise had returned safely to her moorings, and that all the communications from Hurotas and Tehuti which it had carried were well received and agreed upon. As the first rays of the morning sun dispersed the shades of night I kissed the heads of each of the three birds and threw them into the air. They climbed into the sky on eager wings and made two or three circuits of the fortress before they flew away on a northerly heading.
Then we settled down to wait with all the patience we were able to muster. Weneg and his spies kept a day and night watch on the palace of Luxor and the harbour for the first sign of any unusual activity. I knew that we would not have much longer to wait, for Pentu informed me that Hurotas was almost on the point of following him when he left Port Githion. In the event it was a mere twelve days before Weneg hurried up the road from the city. From the top of the main tower of the Garden of Joy I watched him come. Even at a distance of almost half a league I could make out the excited expression on his face. When he saw me he stood in the stirrups and waved both hands above his head.
I rushed down the staircase to meet him at the front gates. ‘The entire city of Luxor is in an uproar!’ he shouted as soon as we were close enough to hear each other. ‘Drums beating and horns blowing! Utteric is girding his loins for war, or should I say girding the loins of his men for war while he hides under the bed.’
‘This must mean that Hurotas and Hui are at last approaching this very Egypt, with their allies. Find Rameses! An hour ago he was in the garden with the princess. Tell him that we are going into Luxor to assess the scale of Utteric’s warlike preparations, and try to fathom out his intentions. We will don the same old rags that we wore on our first visit to your wine shop. I will meet him at the main gates as soon as he is ready.’
I had deliberately left my own disguise unwashed and sealed in a wooden box, to prevent the lively stench that it emitted from evaporating. This was still sufficiently powerful to bring tears to my eyes when I sniffed it. I daubed my face and hands with soot and placed on my head a wig made up of an assortment of various types of hair, both human and animal. This was also unwashed, and infested with vermin. The vermin served to deter the unwelcome attention of strangers.
As I passed the stables I paused to examine my reflection in the water of the horse trough and saw that I looked sufficiently repulsive. I hurried on to the main gates where Rameses was already waiting for me. He was also untouchable in appearance and robust in odour, but in a more regal manner than I was or for that matter was the elderly crone who accompanied him. She was grossly overweight and her facial features were hidden behind a tangled mat of greasy grey hair. She waddled forward to greet me, and when I realized it was her intention to embrace me, I backed away in alarm.
‘Kindly unhand me, madam!’ I warned her off. ‘I must caution you that I am riddled with both leprosy and the black pox.’
‘Both of them? How greedy you are, Tata! But I am not fussy. From you I will take either one you can spare.’ She tinkled with her own enchanting laughter. ‘Stand still so I can give you a kiss.’
‘Serrena!’ I cried. ‘How did you put on so much weight so suddenly?’
‘Just a few of the dresses that Mama sent me, packed around my waist. I learned the trick from you. But I must commend you: I just adore your hairstyle.’
The three of us slipped through the back gate of the fortress on the side furthest from the city, then under cover of the forest we circled back and came to Luxor from another direction entirely. Long before we were in sight of the city walls we heard the martial music: the drums, the fifes and the trumpets echoing up from the valley. Then when we were able to look down from the surrounding hills the first thing that caught our attention was the fleet of transports and warships anchored in the Nile River. There seemed to be several hundred of them, too many of them to count. They were moored so closely together that they made the great river look like solid ground.
Although their sails were furled, all the masts and rigging were festooned with flags of every conceivable shape, size and colour. Hundreds of smaller rowing boats threaded the narrow lanes of open water between them. These were piled high with the barrels and baggage that they were ferrying out to the larger vessels. My heart beat faster and the blood within it was fired by this warlike display.
Most people look upon me as a sage and a philosopher, a man of noble spirit and an essentially gentle and forgiving nature. However, beneath the veneer lurks the revenging warrior and the ruthless man of action. At that moment the hatred that I bore Pharaoh Utteric was so intense that it seemed to scald my very soul.
When we looked down on the city that stood between us and the river-bank we saw that within its walls the excitement and the warlike preparations were every bit as intense as those on the river itself. Every turret and tower, every rooftop and the encircling walls of the city itself were decked with flags.
Outside the city walls every road and footpath was packed solidly with traffic. There were chariots, carriages and carts drawn by men and horses and oxen and even by goats. This entire throng was converging on Luxor. The three of us started down through the dense forest that covered the hillside; disappearing into it until we met one of the tracks leading to the rear gates of the city. One at a time we left the screen of vegetation, adjusting our ludicrous clothing as though we had been attending to a call of nature amongst the bushes, and we joined the column trundling down to Luxor. No one took the least notice of us, and nobody questioned us when we reached the city gates. We were swept through them by the multitudes.
The streets of the city were even more densely packed with people than the country roads had been. The only persons who were able to move with any purpose were the squadrons and platoons of heavily armed men marching in endless ranks down to the docks to board their transports. Sergeants with whips went ahead of them, cursing the crowds and lashing out at those who blocked the way.
As soon as they passed the streets closed up again, so that we could only shuffle along, jammed shoulder to shoulder and belly to back. Of course, both Rameses and I knew the layout of the city intimatel
y; at one time it had been home to both of us. We managed to duck out of the main thoroughfares and into the alleyways and subterranean tunnels between the buildings and under them. Some of these passages were so narrow and dark that we had to move in single file, sucking in our bellies and turning sideways in the more constricted places. We held aloft burning candles or tapers to make out the way ahead. We steeled ourselves to the knowledge that the rickety buildings above us were prone to collapse, and close around us under the rubble lay the crushed corpses of hundreds of unfortunates who had been killed by the frequent cave-ins.
The tunnels we were following led with no or very little warning into caverns and chambers of various sizes and heights. All these rooms were filled with traders who were busily employed selling or buying any of the myriad objects on offer.
Amongst some of the more unusual wares that I noted were bottles of the goddess Hathor’s urine. I offered one of these as a gift to the princess as they were very reasonably priced. However, she declined on the grounds that she was quite capable of producing her own.
One of the vendors, a creature with a heavily painted face and of indeterminate gender, accosted me with the salutation, ‘Hello, darling boy, how about a bit of toing and froing, or if you prefer it inning and outing?’
‘Too early for me, I am afraid. I have not yet digested my breakfast. It will give me hiccups,’ I declined politely.
He, she or it stared at me suspiciously and then challenged me, ‘You remind me of the famous Lord Taita, the seer and sage. Except that you are older and much uglier.’
‘I doubt you ever met Taita,’ I returned the challenge.
‘Oh yes I did.’ He waggled his forefinger under my nose. ‘I knew him well.’
‘Then tell me something about him that nobody else knows.’
‘He had a pleasure post that was longer than an elephant’s proboscis and thicker than the wanker of a whale. But he is dead now.’
‘No, that was his twin brother you are thinking of. The real Lord Taita was left-handed. That is the only way you could tell them apart,’ I explained.
He looked perplexed and picked his nose. Then he shook his head and mumbled, ‘That’s strange! I never even suspected that Lord Taita had a twin.’ He wandered away still picking his nose. Both Rameses and Serrena lifted the hair of their wigs that hung down over their eyes and stared at me.
‘I wish I was able to lie with a straight face like that,’ Rameses told me wistfully.
‘What is your twin brother’s name? If he is younger and prettier than you are, I would like to meet him,’ Serrena asked me seriously, and Rameses pinched her buttock so she squeaked.
Rameses and I continued working our way through the subterranean labyrinth towards the surface. Finally we climbed up a derelict sewer and came out in a corner of the parade ground behind the pile of ancient rubble which concealed an open-air latrine that was popular with both sexes. There were a number of patrons engrossed with their business when we emerged amongst them. We took little notice of each other but all of us continued unperturbed with what we were about.
On that memorable day the parade ground was the busiest and most crowded part of the entire city. We would not have been able to force our way into the amphitheatre if we had attempted the usual route. As previously arranged we found Weneg and four of his ruffians waiting to welcome us at the exit from the informal latrine. They gathered up the three of us, forming a protective cocoon to shield us from being trodden under by the multitude, and we forced our way up the stone tiers until we reached a ledge near the summit from where we had a splendid view over the stadium. This was packed almost shoulder to shoulder with what seemed to be the entire population of Luxor.
Only the centre of the stadium was bare. It was roped off and protected from being engulfed by the masses of humanity by guards standing shoulder to shoulder facing outwards with drawn blades. Below our perch was a raised wooden saluting podium. However, for the moment it was also empty. In front of the podium was a bandstand on which a fifty-piece band was belting out lusty marching tunes and patriotic airs.
The tumult mounted steadily until with a final clash of cymbals the band fell silent and the drum major turned to face the audience with his arms held high. Slowly the din subsided.
Then in the silence a tall figure stepped on to the bandstand. It was a figure of pure gold. From head to feet it was covered with the glittering metal. Gold helmet and face-plate, golden cuirass and golden greaves and sandals. The sunlight played full upon it, dazzling the eyes. It was a skilful display of showmanship.
Then once again the band burst into a full-throated anthem. I recognized it as the epic created by Utteric to his own glory, to which he had given the modest title ‘The Invincible’. This was the signal for a regiment of Royal Guards to take to the field. They marched out a thousand strong, beating their swords against their shields and singing the chorus of the anthem:
‘Ten thousand dead upon the field,
But the Invincible lives on!
Ten thousand years pass by,
But still the Invincible persists!’
Listening to the inane and ridiculous assertions of the chorus I felt my rage and my hatred flaring afresh for the monster who now ruled Egypt. His madness was enhanced by the cunning and shrewdness with which he leavened it. I glanced at Serrena where she sat beside me. She was instantly aware of my eyes upon her. She replied to my unspoken comment without taking her eyes from the golden figure.
‘You are right, Taita. Utteric is mad but clever. He is slaughtering his own aristocracy, the great body of men whom his father, Pharaoh Tamose, trained to perfection, the army which defeated the Hyksos and drove them from this land of Egypt, because they are his father’s men. It is because their loyalty lies with his father in his tomb. In the view of Utteric they are all yesterday’s men. Men like you and Rameses. He knows all of you despise him, so he wants you destroyed, and replaced with men like Panmasi who worship him.’
Now she turned her head and looked at me for the first time, and she smiled. ‘Of course, you know that Panmasi who captured me is now a general in Utteric’s new army? In fact he commands the Royal Guards: the regiment that you see out there.’ She pointed with her chin; she was much too canny to use her forefinger and so draw attention to herself. ‘That is Panmasi standing behind Pharaoh on the reviewing podium.’
I had not recognized him until now that Serrena drew my attention to him. His helmet had obscured his features and he was partially hidden by those others who surrounded him.
‘And you?’ I asked her. ‘Don’t you feel anger when you see those two together, Utteric and Panmasi: the ones that humiliated and tortured you?’
She thought about my question for a few seconds and then she replied softly, ‘No, not anger; that is too mild a term for it. What I feel is a boiling sense of fury.’
I was unable to see her expression behind the dangling strands of the wig that she wore, but her tone was completely convincing. At that moment the marching guards came to a halt with one last stamp of their feet and held the bare blades of their weapons aloft in salute to Utteric in his golden armour. The abrupt silence that gripped all of us, both spectators and participants, was so profound that it was almost palpable.
Then the gold-clad figure of Pharaoh stepped to the front of the podium. Slowly and deliberately he stripped the glove from his right hand, and held his bare hand aloft. I felt Serrena stiffen beside me, but I could see no reason for this reaction of hers. It was not unusual for even Pharaoh to bare his right hand in this manner when saluting his troops.
However, the next thing that happened was totally unexpected.
On the far end of the parade ground facing the podium was a hillock which was a favourite vantage point from which privileged spectators were allowed to view the martial display. It was a distance of less than two hundred paces from the crest of the hillock to the front edge of the podium.
Abruptly a small, dark object took f
light from amongst the crowd on the distant hillock. I have exceptionally acute eyesight, and even against the dense mass of humanity I picked it out the very instant it was launched into flight. At first I thought it was a bird, but almost immediately I saw my mistake.
‘Look at that!’ I exclaimed. ‘Somebody has shot an arrow!’
‘Where?’ Rameses demanded, but Serrena had picked it out just an instant after me.
‘There, above the hillock.’ She pointed it out as it reached the zenith of its flight and began the drop. ‘It’s coming straight towards us.’
I made the calculation. ‘It won’t reach us. It has been lofted too high. But it is dropping straight towards Utteric.’ I scrambled to my feet. I was suddenly appalled by the fact that it was Utteric, my deadly enemy, who was in danger. If the arrow killed him I would be deprived of my revenge for all the suffering he had inflicted upon me and those persons dearest to me. I wanted to shout a warning to him but the arrow was dropping too fast for any call from me to be effective. Utteric still stood with his right hand upraised. His golden helmet and the cuirass that covered his chest were a shining beacon to which the arrow flew relentlessly. It was as though Utteric was welcoming death.
I saw the heavy arrowhead was fashioned from chiselled flint, designed especially to penetrate armour. It would tear through the malleable chest plate as though it were papyrus. Time seemed to slow down. Everyone, including Utteric’s staff and especially me, seemed to be frozen, unable to move. The arrow blurred with its velocity over the final few feet and then with a metallic clangour like that of a great bell it struck. Utteric was hurled backwards. But in the fleeting instant while he was still on his feet I saw the head of the arrow and half the shaft protruding from between his shoulder blades. It had transfixed him completely.
Then Utteric crashed into the wooden boards of the podium with such force that some of them splintered. He lay without further movement, pierced through his evil heart, and killed instantly.