The sound of glass shattering jolted me awake. I scrambled up and tried to look around. It was pitch black. Rustling bed covers alerted me that Antony was awake.
‘Are you okay?’ I whispered.
‘I knocked the glass over trying to get a drink. I’m cold.’ His teeth chattered.
It would be just my luck that he had a fever. How was it even possible in this day and age? Of all the lifetimes I had lived, I was sure that this was the best one for medicine. I blinked as the thought flashed through my mind. It had been a while since I had thought about my past lives. I often had dreams of times gone by. My mother had informed me that I was remembering times of the past when I had been someone else. My soul had inhabited many different bodies to gain experience. Each dream was just a snippet, a small screenshot of that lifetime. I could never piece anything together because I wasn’t supposed to remember. There would be too much pain, too many memories. A part of me longed to connect to a past life so that I could make more sense of the now. Another part knew that it was best to let the journey unfold naturally.
‘I’m going to turn on the light.’ I tried to feel my way to the lamp on the dressing table.
Somehow I made it without bumping into anything. When light flooded the room, my eyes traced the glass on the floor. A big chunk was next to where my head had been. I stepped around it and went to the other side of the bed. Antony watched me but his eyes were glazed.
‘Shall I ring for an ambulance?’ I whispered.
He shook his head. ‘No, there’ll be too many questions. Just do what the doctor said.’
I touched his forehead, and although it felt hot, he still shivered.
‘He said to look out for a fever. He didn’t say what to do if you had one.’ I knelt on the bed next to him.
‘Just hold me. Use your body heat to warm me,’ he whispered.
I hesitated. I had never been that close to a man before and the thought of it scared me.
‘Do you want to help me…or not?’ His teeth chattered.
Sliding under the cover, I wrapped my arm around his waist. He lifted his good arm and I nestled into the crook of his shoulder, resting my head on his bare chest. His heartbeat vibrated against my cheek.
‘That’s better.’ He sighed as my body heat started to sink into him.
His skin was hot against mine. I was glad he felt warmer. I swallowed, trying to stay completely still. It didn’t take long for his breathing to become shallow. How was I now in bed with Antony? I needed to find my twin flame, and there I was, cuddling up to an ordinary man that worked for my father.
Finding sleep was hard. I drifted in and out of consciousness for hours. Being so close to someone I hardly knew, didn’t help me rest easily.
The feel of his breath on my cheek made my eyes flicker open. His head was turned towards me, his face inches from my forehead. I should’ve stayed completely still but in my grogginess I tilted my head back to look into his face.
He was much closer than I realised and his eyes were open. My arm tightened around him without my consent. The light from around the curtain told me it was morning. Our breath mingled together. We were so close. He brought his head forward slightly and our lips met. The caress sent tingles flying over my body. A rush of air pulled through his nose and into his lungs as he held me against his side. The kiss deepened and he licked my lips, requesting me to open my mouth. In my sleepiness, I couldn’t deny him. He couldn’t hold my head with his good arm but he didn’t need to. I opened to him and his tongue touched mine. I gasped at the unfamiliar caress but didn’t pull away.
Tracing my hand up his chest, I cupped his jaw. He squeezed me against him and kissed me hard. My head was bent back. Our breath grew heavy and after a moment, he let go.
‘Sorry.’ He panted.
My senses reeled. My body hummed with a vibration that I had never felt before. He set me alight. I was relieved that he had pulled away. I wasn’t sure if I could have resisted if he had chosen to take things further.
‘It’s okay,’ I replied, going to move away.
He held me tight. I couldn’t move. I nestled into his neck. My nose brushed against his skin and the smell of him made my heart beat even faster.
‘I…’
He couldn’t speak and I didn’t want to say anything. The kiss had blown me away but it shouldn’t have happened. He was my bodyguard. We weren’t supposed to be in bed together. The thought didn’t worry me enough to move. I felt comfortable and cosy lying with him.
‘Don’t speak,’ I whispered.
‘But there’s something I have to tell you.’
My muscles froze. His words sent shock through me. I knew it was bad. The way my stomach clenched told me that whatever it was, it was going to sting.
‘I can’t be your soulmate.’
The words confused me. I had been convinced that he would say that he had a girlfriend, or something. I pulled away and looked into his eyes. He winced as the movement hurt his wounded shoulder. He looked a lot better with only a light sheen of sweat covering his forehead.
‘I didn’t think you could,’ I said.
He wasn’t my soulmate. There was supposed to be an amazing feeling of butterflies and an instant recognition when we first met. I didn’t have that with Antony. But I had something else.
‘That’s good, then. I promise this won’t happen again. We’ll start to look for your soulmate today.’
I was still, not sure whether to get out of bed, or stay where I was. It surprised me how much his words stung. He had just kissed me and now he pushed me away.
‘Yes, I better get started,’ I replied.
He pulled me down so that we were face to face. ‘I would really like to be friends, Pisces. Let’s forget this ever happened.’
Forcing a smile, I climbed out of bed. I wasn’t going to show him that my heart burnt at his words. Was I that insignificant? Did he just take advantage because I was a woman in bed with him? As I picked up my things, I vowed to never let a man do that to me again. It felt like crap and I had to bite my lip. It betrayed me as it started to tremble.
‘The doctor will be here soon. I’ll send Derek in to see if you’re well enough to get up.’
I left without looking back at the bed. I didn’t want him to know how hurt I was by his rejection. It was ridiculous really. I needed to find my soulmate, not waste time with Antony. It was time to distract myself from my bodyguard by going back to London to start my search.